Chapter 2: Apples and Oranges

Sonny wished he could read her mind. He wished he knew what thoughts were swirling behind her brown eyes. Maybe she just didn't want to go to Brenda's wedding. Yeah if he said that out loud his psychiatrist would probably wonder if his medications needed further adjustment. It wasn't going to Brenda's wedding it was going somewhere with him.

Maybe his medications did need further adjustment, because he had clearly been living in a fantasy world. Somehow, at least in his mind, he had been convinced that bringing Alexis to Brenda's wedding was the perfect plan. When he had realized that letting go of Brenda and Carly might leave him free to find love, he hadn't been able to admit to himself that it was Alexis he had been looking for. Yet, he could see it had been. So, bringing her to Brenda's wedding had seemed like the perfect completion of the circle. Or not he guessed.

He thought back to that fateful conversation with Brenda. It had been a few days before Lulu Spencer's Junior Prom. Brenda had volunteered them to help outfit Lulu and Spinelli. Sonny had gone along with it for Brenda. Or maybe he had gone along with it mostly for Brenda. After all, Lulu was Luke Spencer's daughter. At one point, he and Luke had been friends and business partners. Things had gone downhill from there, that seemed to be a theme in his relationships Sonny realized. Even so, even if Luke had helped give Faith the opportunity to kidnap his kids and things would never really be the same, Sonny hadn't been able to forget the past as if it had never happened. So, he would help his old friend Luke Spencer's daughter. He had just wished that Luke Spencer's daughter could have selected to love someone other than Spinelli.

May 23, 2007

"Thanks! Well I better get Lulu because we need to get going," Brenda said as she stood up from the bench they were sitting on in the cobblestone courtyard of Port Charles Crossing.

"Where are you going?" Sonny asked.

"To Temptations…"

"Temptations?"

Brenda's eyes sparkled as she spoke. She really seemed happy and Sonny wanted to be happy for her. "It's Lucy Coe's dress line. I'm going to find Lulu something that hasn't been released yet. No one else will have it that way."

Sonny raised an eyebrow. "Lucy is going along with this?" he asked. He wouldn't have expected that, but he supposed people could change. He wanted to it was just figuring out how to actually do that which was the hard part.

"Well you know she and Luke were partners in his club for a while," Brenda said.

"Yeah, and Luke nearly killed her, or at least complained to anyone in ear shot that he wanted to repeatedly multiple times. Plus, there was that whole issue with Damian Smith," Sonny said.

"Ok well maybe I made a little deal with Lucy," Brenda admitted.

"Am I going to like this?"

"Well more than I am I think," Brenda said.

"What are you promising her?"

"Oh, I might have agreed to do a photo shoot for her Temptation line," Brenda said.

"You do realize that your old pal Jax owns part of that company with her," Sonny said.

Brenda sat down again. "Well, yes, but he still owns part of Deception Cosmetics too and I do work for them and just avoid him. Anyway, if Jax has a problem then it's his problem. He actually did me a favor because I would have married him, Sonny," she said.

"I know," Sonny said.

"Of course, you know. You were on the other end of the kiss; you know it was a kiss goodbye."

"I'm sorry for what part Ally played in that," Sonny said.

"Don't be, if I had married Jax I never would have had the opportunity with Cruz. Don't be mad, but I love him," Brenda said.

"I'm starting to see that. Which probably means us being seen together isn't a great thing," Sonny said.

"It's ok, Cruz knows we're friends and he deals," Brenda said with a smile. "Anyway, Ally already tried to convince him I was sleeping with Jason. She failed, but she tried."

"With Jason?" Sonny asked. He wanted Brenda to be happy, but he wasn't sure that Brenda being happy with Jason was something he could ever really wrap his mind around. Perhaps his feelings were unjustified; especially since he had slept with Ally who he was starting to see Jason might love. He liked to think he had no clue that Jason had any feelings for Ally then; after all Jason had been still dating Robin Scorpio when Ally and Sonny had what he supposed could best be described as "hate sex". Sonny shook his head, could he be any more messed up?

"I'm not sleeping with Jason. Ally just wanted Cruz to think that."

"Right, of course," Sonny said as he tried to hide the relief that flooded through his veins.

"Well you better go finish outfitting Mr. Spinelli. I'm supposed to meet Lucy before five," Brenda said as she stood again.

"Have Johnny take you; I'll have Mike give Milo, Spinelli, and I a ride later," Sonny said.

"Thanks," Brenda said and then she flashed him the smile that made it all worth it. She took a few steps forward and then turned back to face Sonny. "Maybe we can all have dinner at Kelly's later?" she suggested.

"You probably should spend some time with Cruz," Sonny said. Normally if he said that it would be laced with bitterness, but there wasn't bitterness.

"Cruz is working tonight; I don't mean to make you feel like my second choice though."

"We're apples and oranges baby," Sonny said.

Brenda laughed. "Good analogy, I'll call you when we're done," she said. She flashed another smile and opened the door to After Eight to collect Lulu.

Sonny stood outside for another moment watching her and Lulu walk towards the parking lot outside the perimeter of the enclosed outdoor mall. Where exactly his last line had come from, he had no idea. It was almost impulsive and free, sort of like where he had been years ago. Maybe it was a sign of better things to come. Maybe letting go of Brenda and Ally left him free to find love again.

He thought he remembered that conversation, and the feelings it evoked, so vividly because that was the day he had felt hope for the first time in a long time. That had been the day that Alexis had told him she forgave him. But maybe forgiveness wasn't enough. Maybe it wasn't just Brenda and Ally he had to let go, but Alexis as well. He wasn't sure he could do that though.

Before he could really finish that thought he heard a familiar squeal as Kristina came through the door and across the living room into his arms. "Hey, princess, how was school?"

Kristina smiled at him, oblivious to what she might have interrupted. "We learned about multiplication. Oh, but the classroom rabbit doesn't like Max. He bit him."

Sonny glanced over at Kristina's personal guard, Max Giambetti. He looked more embarrassed than angry. Sometimes Sonny envied Max's inner calm, as Lois would have called it. Supposedly his lamictal was supposed to help him find his own inner calm. "Are you alright?" he finally asked Max.

"Oh, yeah, it was just a little nip and all my shots are up to date," Max said.

"Yeah, that annual company physical is good for that," Sonny said.

Alexis rolled her eyes. Sonny wondered if she was annoyed with his attempt at humor or if it was him.

"Kristina, go upstairs and brush your teeth you have a dentist's appointment in thirty minutes," Alexis said.

Kristina pouted. "Didn't we go to the dentist already this year?"

"Yes, in April, it is now October. You're supposed to have your teeth cleaned every six months. Now, scoot!" Alexis said.

"Daddy!" Kristina whined.

"Your mother is right, go brush your teeth," Sonny said.

Kristina stuck her bottom lip out a little more but then she turned and went up the stairs to the upper level of the townhouse.

"Thank you," Alexis said.

"Why are you thanking me? She has to know she can't play us against each other. Anyway, I want her to have nice teeth," Sonny said.

"You know, I'm going to go wait in the car," Max said. He was out the door before either Alexis or Sonny could say anything more.

"So, about this wedding?" Alexis asked.

"Yes?" Sonny asked with trepidation.

Another uncomfortable silence enveloped them. Just as Alexis opened her mouth, Kristina bounded back down the stairs and back into his arms.

Sonny smiled at his daughter. He didn't know what else to do and it wasn't her fault that her parents couldn't seem to get things together. "Are your teeth all brushed?"

"Yes!" Kristina said, then she flashed him a very broad dimpled smile to prove it.

Sonny pulled his daughter close to him and kissed the top of her head. "I love you, Krissy, always remember that." Maybe Ally Rescott Corinthos Spencer Corinthos Alcazar Corinthos Durant wasn't the only woman he needed to figure out how to platonically co parent with.

It was different with Alexis though. At first, he thought it was because she didn't hate him, and she acknowledged he tried to be a good father. Life would be so much easier if Ally could get there. It wasn't just that though, he loved Alexis. Honestly, he wasn't sure if he had ever loved Ally. He had thought he had, he had wanted to at different times, but he wasn't sure he ever had. In retrospect, he was pretty certain that, in the spring of 1999, when Ally burst into his penthouse and found him making love to Alexis that his fling had met the woman he was falling in love with. Alexis hadn't been the fling though.

But Ally had attempted suicide after she walked in on them and guilt had pulled him back in. Alexis hadn't discouraged him. He had thought she was being noble, maybe she just wasn't that into him.

"Are you coming to the dentist with us?" Kristina asked.

Sonny could hear the hope in her voice. It broke his heart.

"No, your father has a meeting he has to get to. You can call him later and let him know how your checkup went and you're going to spend the night at his house tomorrow," Alexis said quickly.

He didn't have a meeting to get to. He didn't have anything planned. He'd probably go home and have dinner with Lois and reflect on the irony that maybe if both of them were less stubborn, or more willing to take a few risks to follow their heart, that Ned and Alexis never would have had a sham marriage and maybe all four of them, and their respective children, might be a little less broken.

Sonny debated challenging Alexis but decided not to. He had used Anthony and Morgan to try to pull Ally back in when she'd left him for Jax. He had vowed to never do that again and he wouldn't use Kristina or Molly to pull Alexis back to him. Maybe he just had to accept that she was never his to begin with. In his heart he knew that even lamictal and trileptal wouldn't get him there though.

Sonny gave his daughter one final hug, then released her and stood. "Bring your appetite tomorrow night because I'm making your favorite," he said as he started across the room to the front door.

"Lasagna?" Kristina squealed.

Sonny smiled. "Of course, only the best for my princesses," he said. Then he went out the door before he had to admit that the plural hadn't just referred to Kristina and Molly.