Disclaimer: I do not own Faith.
Warning: Contains graphic images of death and suicide.
Author's Note: This is my first Buffy fic. I would really appreciate some honest reviews. The lyrics are from the Seether song; 'Fine Again'. Lyrics are in bold italics.
It seems like every day's the same
and I'm left to discover on my own
It seems like everything is gray
and there's no color to behold
They say it's over and I'm fine again, yeah
Try to stay sober feels like I'm dying here
Faith surveyed her surroundings, always the slayer. She walked further into the crypt, searching for any vampire – un-friendlies. Seeing nothing, she laid down on top of a tomb. There was a strange sensation crawling up her spine. There was something morbid yet surreal about lying literally with the dead. After all, a slayer is death. So Faith had been contemplating this, which was unlike herself. Usually, she just let be, going with the paces and fireballs that life threw at her. But this was special. There was something innocent, something pure about being, in essence, death, that she had never felt before.
And I am aware now of how
everything's gonna be fine one day
Too late, I'm in hell I am prepared now,
seems everyone's gonna be fine
One day too late, just as well
But now she was in grieving, maybe that's why she could see it. She could see the light, the peacefulness associated with demise, a radiant sparkle of life that was elimuminated with a step into the darkness. Death was always there, it surrounded her, comforting her frayed senses. She felt that there was more to death than a semi – real existence in life. I can only be real if I am not living is what her thoughts led her too. The thought of being at peace, no more of her past coming up and biting her in the ass, was extremely appealing. For once, she felt something other than pain. I get it, is all she could think as she surrendered to the darkness once and for all, crimson pain etched down pale flesh.
I feel the dream in me expire
and there's no one left to blame it on
I hear you label me a liar
'cause I can't seem to get this through
You say it's over, I can sigh again, yeah
Why try to stay sober when I'm dying here
Faith closed her eyes, revelling in the pain of an open wound. She felt healed, like her life was meant to end this way. But she felt loved. She felt as if every thing in her life happened how it was supposed to, and she ended up as the person who she was meant to be. But maybe, this was her destiny. Maybe she was meant to descend into a world of darkness, only to be brought back to the world through the one thing she was always fighting.
And I'm not scared now.
I must assure you,
you're never gonna get away
And I'm not scared now.
And I'm not scared now. No…
I am aware now of how
everything's gonna be fine one day
Too late, I'm in hell
I am prepared now
seems everyone's gonna be fine
One day too late, just as well
I am prepared now,
seems everything's gonna be fine for me
For me; for myself.
For me, for me, for myself
For me, for me, for myself.
She died then, born into a different world, a world filled with light, waiting for an everlasting absolution, which would never come.