I know there are a lot of Sesshomaru fangirls out there mad at me for making him eat dog food. But I don't care…the big fruitcake…

"HOT DAMN!" Kurayami shouted. Jaken's death is truly a momentous occasion, so she called Maru-sha and Chiyo-chan and told them the glorious news!

"Hey, bitches!" She said with a ton of excitement. "Guess what?"

"You're pregnant with Naraku's baby?" Chiyo-chan asked.

"You got accepted into Heaven?" Maru-sha inquired.

"I wish, and hell no," Kurayami said, annoyed. "Jaken is dead!"

"WHAT?" They both exclaimed. "No way!"

"We're comin' over to look." Maru-sha said "I'll see you."

"Me too!" Said Chiyo-chan. Kurayami then hung up the phone and waltzed over to Rin, who was with Sesshomaru. Like always, he was emotionless. It was hard to determine whether he was mad, sad, happy, or just in La-la Land. Rin simply smiled at him and said "Aren't you proud of Rin?"

He just gave her a half-second smile, so he was happy. I think.

"I do believe, she asked you a question." Kurayami said to him. "Are you?" He just gave her an evil glare; she gave him an evil smile in response. Before he can answer, Maru-sha and Chiyo-chan burst through the door.

Hold everything, HOLD EVERYTHING!" Maru-sha hollered. She walked to the odd group of people standing around Jaken's burnt body. Chiyo-chan shrieked at his corpse, and hid behind Maru-sha. Maru-sha just knelt down beside him, feeling brave and poked his body with a stick (who knows where she got that from).

"So he is dead," Maru-sha said, but she jumped up in excitement. "LET'S PARRRRRTAYYYY!" The three "sisters" party-shouted and started doing the Can-can, while singing a mangled version of "Joy to the World" for the occasion.

"Joy to the world,

Jaken is dead,

'cause Rin just smoked his ass!

What are we gonna do with da body?

We're gonna cremate da body!

And dump his ash in da trash!

And dump his ash in da trash!

And duuummmp, and dump his ash in da trash!"

They sang and sang, and eventually everyone, except for Sesshomaru, joined in and did the Can-can, too.

"I'm actually glad that Jaken is gone. We should celebrate." Sesshomaru said, still emotionless.

"YAY!" Everyone said, happily.

He smiled a little. "But instead we must have a funeral."

"AWWWWWW!" Everyone said, upset. What's the use of throwing a funeral for someone so…BITCHY?

"Does that mean we have to wear all black?" Chiyo-chan asked.

"That's all I wear." Kurayami scoffed.

"Really?" Koga inquired. "I haven't really noticed."

"Me neither." Inuyasha said.

"GOOD!" Kurayami exclaimed happily. She likes to be overlooked. Less people to deal with, she says.

"I have!" Naraku said merrily.

"DAMN!" Kurayami said angrily.

"What? I would never look over you, my little jewel!" He said with sparkly eyes, grabbing her hands and rubbing the side of his face with them. Kurayami just grabbed him by the hair and chucked him out the room.

(30 minutes later)

Everyone walked outside and stood under Kurayami's giant avocado tree and around Jaken, who was stuffed inside a shoebox, which served as a coffin. Everyone was just in their usually outfits, except for Kurayami, who was wearing a black, long velvet dress with a hood. It wasn't a costume, really, but on Halloween she lied to everyone and said it was. Kurayami was already thought of as a VERY suspicious girl at her all-girl high-school. Kurayami was serving as a priestess (even though she's the most unholy individual among them.)

"We are FORCED to gather her today," Kurayami started, "As we are FORCED—OW!" Chiyo-chan hit her on the arm to tell her to stop. "Alright, alright. As we are about to mourn the death of Jaken, Sesshomaru's, uh, um…" she whispered to Sesshomaru. "What kind of servant is he?" He just shrugged.

"Ooookay, Sesshomaru's servant." She continued. "He was a good little toad, I think. Not only did he serve as a good servant, but also as a good volleyball."

"Football." Inuyasha chimed in,

"Basketball." Koga added,

"Baseball." Miroku said,

"Tennis ball." Kagome said,

"Birdie," Sango said,

"Regular bouncy-ball." Shippo piped up,

"Meow." Kirara purred, which probably meant, "A substitute for a ball of string."

"Wow!" Kurayami exclaimed, "He was useful after all! Well, let us pray. People, bow your heads." Everyone obeyed and bowed their heads.

Kurayami started "God, Buddha, my weak-ass father, Satan," Everyone winced as they heard her say his name. "Please, whatever poor sap Jaken happens to go to in the afterlife, bless him, and yourselves. Make sure you take good care of him, and your sanity. Amen."

"Amen." Everyone said. Kirara meowed hers.

"Ok," Inuyasha said. "It's over, so, we gonna bury the little runt?"

"Hell no," Kurayami said. "He might poison the avocados. Besides, I have no shovel."

"Then let's throw him away!" Chiyo-chan suggested.

"You don't have to tell me twice!" Kurayami said happily, ready to throw his carcass out. Then, all of a sudden, Jaken popped up from his shoebox coffin. Looking around at everyone, who was just wide-eyed in surprise. Of course, Jaken started rambling.

"What is going on? I demand to know what's going on! Milord, what's going on? Why am I in this box? Why are we under a tree? Well don't just stand there, get me out!"

Everyone was just pissed now, Rin looked at Kurayami with a questioning look. Kurayami took a hint and nodded her head in agreement. Rin took out "The Outsider", the gun Kurayami gave to her.

"Rin? Rin! Rin, you little wench! You put me in this box did you? Don't lie to me—Uh Rin? Rin, what are you doing with that? RI—"

BOOM!

Rin shot Jaken.

Boy, he's even worse after dying. Well he's truly dead now. So review if you want, but—hell you know what I'm going to say! Make sure you do that, you damn mortals! Sayonara!

Next Chapter:Shippo and Rin, sittin' in a tree...