Confessions Of A Jacked Up Feudal Era

Chapter 1

It was a quiet and snowy night. Everyone had gone out in search of fire wood, except for

Sango and Kagome. Kagome had something on her mind. "Hey Sango, can…can we talk for

a bit" she asked. "Of course Kagome" said Sango happily and cheerfully. Kagome sat next

to Sango and grabbed her hand. "Umm, Sango promise me, promise me that we will always

be friends" she said. "Of course Kagome, nothing can destroy our friendship" she said so

full of life. "Ok, well then, here I go, I have been having an affair with Miroku" said

Kagome. The life Sango had had just died out. "WHAT?" said Sango shocked. "I am so

sorry that this happened, but it did" said Kagome. Sango stood up and began to put her

amour on. "Sango what are you doing" asked Kagome. "Oh No Girlfriend, nothing could

destroy our relationship except that" she said. She grabbed her Hiraikotsu. "Sango don't be

rash" said Kagome. Kagome got up and began to run out the door. The front of the hut

burst open as the Hiraikotsu came flying behind Kagome. It hit her in the legs and broke

them. "Sango, no please, I am sorry" said Kagome. "How could you Kagome, you were my

best friend" said Sango "You had Inuyasha". "I know but Inuyasha couldn't even fit a

medium condom" said Kagome. "Are you serious" said Sango. "Yeah, they look like two

berries attached to a twig" said Kagome. "Wow, I always expected Inuyasha to be packing,

THAT'S NOT THE POINT, BACK TO YOU" said Sango who realized she was off subject.

Inuyasha, Shippo, and Miroku came back. "Oh my god, Kagome what happened to your

legs" said Miroku. "You cheating bastard, how could you" said Sango. "What are you

talking about" asked Miroku. "Kagome is pregnant with your baby" she said. "WHAT?

THERE IS NO WAY. SHE SAID SHE WAS ON BIRTH CONTROL!" said Miroku. "I

lied sorry" said Kagome. Miroku took off his prayer beads. "Today this is my WHORE

TUNNEL!" said Miroku. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" screamed Kagome

as she was being sucked into the black void. Everyone was in pure shock and couldn't react

in time. It was too late, Kagome was gone. Little did they know that the wind tunnel actually

transports you to the ghettos of Compton. "OH MY GOD, YOU SUCKED UP KAGOME"

said Inuyasha. "Well she sucked me up first last night" said Miroku. "Why you son of a

…" said Inuyasha when suddenly the moon turned pink. A star formed around it. An elegant

lady appeared before them. "Behold I am the princess of the heavens, Kaguya" she said.

"Look lady what the hell do you want, either show those nice tits you got or beat it" said

Inuyasha. "Do you know who I am, I'm Kaguya Dammit, princess of the heavens, the

celestial maiden, and you talk to me with respect!" she said. Inuyasha got closer to her.

"Kaguya, baby, I know you want this but now isn't a good time" said Inuyasha. "Why you

little, here's my number, I'll be back, call me" she said as she faded away. "Now, where

were we" said Inuyasha. When suddenly, white spirits began to float around them. "Now

who is it" said Inuyasha. Kikyo was standing on top of a tree with a rope around her neck.

"I swear I'll jump" she said crying. "Ok, that's nice Kikyo" said Inuyasha not paying

attention to her. She turned over her wrist. "I cut myself, see, everyday to kill the pain".

"Yeah Kikyo, we all do ok, it's normal" he said. "I TOOK 35 ADVIL PILLS!" she said.

"Well, if you're that doped up, you'd think that you would have jumped by now" said

Inuyasha. "Dose anyone not care about me and my life" she said. "Well, I mean we have

been telling you to jump for the longest, I thought you'd had gotten the message by now" he

said slightly laughing. "Ok Kikyo, here I come to save you" said Inuyasha as he climbed up

the tree. "Finally, someone cares what happens to me" said Kikyo relieved. Then Inuyasha

pushed her off the ledge. "God, she wouldn't shut the hell up" he said as her body was

dangling back and fourth. "Now umm, Miroku what were you about to say". "I was about to

say…" said Miroku when he was interrupted. The wind began to blow everything. The

leaves and dust were picked up and thrown hundreds of feet away. "God Dammit, who is it

now" said Inuyasha again. A massive feather came floating down. It was Kagura. She had a

black eye and her kimono was torn and ripped. "Inuyasha –san, please give me an

extension" she said on her knees kissing his feet. "Get up, where the hell is my money" he

asked. "Please Inuyasha, I have a little" she said as she handed him the money. He looked

at the money and raised his hand back. Then he swung it forward and bitch slapped the hell

out of Kagura. "What the hell am I supposed to do with a dollar fifty, I can't even buy toilet

paper to wipe my ass with a dollar fifty" he said. He grabbed Kagura by the throat. "Look

hoe, Kanna is already sleeping with the fishes because of your crack addiction, if you cant

pay the money, then don't do the drugs, I want my money" he said and threw her down.

"Yes Inuyasha" she said as she crawled to her feather and it lifted to the air. Suddenly a

black man and his wife appeared out of the bushes. "Hey Inu, you got that stuff" he asked.

"Come on out bobby, and tell Whitney everything is clear" said Inuyasha. Bobby Brown

gave Inuyasha the money and got his drugs. "Hey dog, can I get a loan" asked Bobby.

"Bobby, don't make me whop yo ass" said Inuyasha. "Ok, ok man, I was just asking, just

asking" he said and ran off. "Ok, ok finally, now" said Inuyasha as shippo ran out of the

bushes. "GUYS, GUYS, I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING" he said screaming.

Inuyasha was so pissed that he pulled out his 22 gact and capped shippo in the head. "CAN

I NOT HAVE PEACE AND QUIET FOR 5 MINUTES, DAM" he said pissed. "Miroku I

was about to say…" he said when Kouga jumped out of the bushes. He went over to Miroku

and kissed him on the cheek. "Hey, are we still on for our date tonight" he asked. Miroku

looked at Inuyasha who had turned white. Miroku slapped Kouga and punched him in the

stomach. "I'll call you at 9" he whispered in his hear. Kouga nodded and limped off. "I'm

not even going to ask" said Inuyasha. Sango was also shocked. "You've been cheating on

me with Kouga too" she said. "Sango, I can explain, he said he was curious, it was just

eleven times" he said. "Well you know what I have also been cheating on you with someone

too". "Who" said Miroku. "KAEDE" said Sango.

If you just read this story, then your probably like, wow, this story is off the wall. It goes in all different directions. So if you think this should be updated or deleted, then let me know with a review and I will go from there. thnx