Hello, how are you all doing? Talks of Destruction is back and I bring joyous news! The next chapter of OCAK is right around the corner and I think you'll all like one certain scene in it. Liquiir is really happy about it.

Without any further ado, enjoy!

Seasonal Scaling and Christmas Creeping

Lord Liquiir: "YES! YES, YES, YES!" Liquiir screamed to the heavens, knees on the floor and arms raised triumphantly in the air. I smiled. "Thank you! Thank you for taking pity on me, author! I take back all of the bad things I've ever said about you for cockblocking me all of these years!" He sighed and laughed a little. He's walking over to me, literally jingling all the way because he has a bell on his Santa hat and all nine of his tails have one bell each tied to the end of them. He sat down next to me. Just about every movement he makes is causing the bells to ring. That's fun for my ears.

Lord Beerus: "Um...I don't apologize for Liquiir's behavior. He deserved what's going to happen in the next chapter."

Lord Liquiir: "Yes, I did! Repeat after me: loophole. Nothing can bring me down today!"

Bulma: "Or tomorrow, the day after that, or in a thousand years," Bulma said. She's sitting on the couch across from me and Liquiir and there's a mysterious bag next to her on her right. "Hello, I'm Bulma. I'm joined by Lord Beerus. Or should I just call you Beerus from now on?" I glared at her. "What's wrong? 'Tis the season to be friendly."

Lord Beerus: "Do you want to come back to the next show?" She smirked.

Bulma: "I'll always come back. Sitting next to him is Mr. Over-The-Moon Liquiir. This is Talks of Destruction, Christmas edition." We have a small Christmas tree- "It's such an adorable little tree!" I waited a couple of seconds. There's a small tree in the middle of the table decorated with popcorn, gold, silver, and red tinsel, baubles of all kinds, and a gold star on top. There's also a large plate of chocolate chip cookies and eggnog. No, there's not any alcohol in it. Liquiir's just that happy.

Lord Liquiir: "What happens in the next chapter of OCAK was a fantastic present." He closed his eyes and crossed his arms, sighing happily. Bulma looked away from him and focused on me because he spread his legs apart. You'll understand why in a moment.

Lord Beerus: "I can confirm that. I was there. I appreciate this feast for the eyes you're giving us, Liquiir." I mentioned he's wearing a Santa hat, but he's wearing the rest of the outfit as well. However, it's not your typical Santa costume. It's cut off above the knees, giving everyone a great view of his shapely legs, and he's wearing black calf-high snow boots. As if that wasn't enough, his tails look like candy canes. He dressed up as Kurama in the Halloween Special, this year he's a slutty Santa.

Bulma: "Beerus and I didn't dress up as much. We're only wearing Santa hats with those white cotton balls on the end. And I think it's safe to say that Liquiir's on the naughty list this year." She's cracking jokes, but she's doing her best not to stare at him and drool. "Excuse me, I can promise you that I am not staring."

Lord Liquiir: "She's not staring, but she might need a bucket. Also, I'm not a slutty Santa. I'm a ho, ho, ho." I leaned forward and looked up his outfit.

Lord Beerus: "Are you showing us your underwear on purpose?"

Lord Liquiir: "Of course. What better way to spread Christmas cheer than by spreading my legs?" His underwear is a deep red and from what I can see it features snowflakes and a few foxes...wearing Santa hats.

Lord Beerus: "I'm trying to think of a word. What's the word I'm looking for?"

Bulma: "I believe the word you're looking for is 'Fox-ception'. Where did you even find that?" I sat back up.

Lord Liquiir: "The internet. You can find anything on there. Anything." Bulma sighed.

Bulma: "Do you two want to know something?" she asked, still looking anywhere except Liquiir. "Can you please close your legs now?" He closed them. "Thank you. Now I can look in your direction."

Lord Beerus: "What did you want to tell us?"

Bulma: "I think he pulls this look off better than I could and I don't know how to feel about that." He smiled cheekily.

Lord Liquiir: "That's my curse." I pet one of his candy cane tails.

Lord Beerus: "The curse of Liquiir really getting into the holiday spirit. Moving on, we're here because we want to explain the difference between power creep and power scaling. It's something many people don't know and it causes confusion." Liquiir got up from the couch and-that cheeky bastard, he's bending over right in front of me. He's touching his toes! I crossed my legs.

Lord Liquiir: "I'm sorry, I'm getting a little bit of holiday stretching in. You need to stay limber. Anyway, power scaling is simple. It's basically a math problem."

Lord Beerus: "Liquiir, sit back down. You're making me horny...er." He turned his head and pouted at me. "That's making it worse." He straightened up and laughed, grabbing four cookies.

Lord Liquiir: "Okay, I'll sit back down." He sat back down and gave me three of them.

Lord Beerus: "Thanks." I stuffed one into my mouth.

Lord Liquiir: "No problem. As I was saying, think of power scaling as a math problem. If A is greater than B and B is greater than C, that must mean that A is also greater than C. That is proper power scaling. But, if C beats A, that's usually bad. I'm using the word 'usually' because writing and explanations are a factor." He lifted his right leg and used it to point at Bulma. "Bulma, take it away." He put it back down and ate his cookie.

Lord Beerus: "I might take away your costume privileges. Don't get me wrong, you look great. Really great, but you're too distracting like this."

Lord Liquiir: "How am I distracting?" He shook his body.

Lord Beerus: "You know exactly why, Jingles. Couldn't you have just worn a mistletoe at the end of your hat and called it a day?" He reached under his hat and guess what he pulled out and is now dangling over our heads?

Lord Liquiir: "Beerus, will you kiss me under this invasive and semi-parasitic plant that harms trees and has berries that are toxic to us?" I pointed at it.

Lord Beerus: "That's what mistletoes are?"

Lord Liquiir: "Now you know. I learned that from Bulma." I looked over at her. She shrugged.

Bulma: "That's one tradition I wouldn't mind doing away with. Not only do they have all of those bad qualities, they're a sexual harassment lawsuit waiting to happen. 'But you have to kiss me! The mistletoe says you do! So what if I put it on my crotch?' Also stuffing oversized socks with candy. What kid wants their candy to taste like feet?" I chuckled.

Lord Beerus: "Those are all very good points." Liquiir placed his paw on my shoulder, getting my attention.

Lord Liquiir: "So? Are you going to kiss me?" He shook the mistletoe.

Lord Beerus: "I'll kiss you, but not because of this shrub. I'm kissing you because I want to." I kissed him on the lips for a few seconds before pulling away. I took the mistletoe away from him and threw it at Bulma.

Bulma: "Uh-wha-hey! Don't throw bad traditions at me!" She tossed it onto the table. "Hm. Maybe I'll give it to my sister. I'm not saying she's desperate, but..."

Lord Beerus: "But...we still have a show to do. Can you explain what power creep is?"

Bulma: "Sure. Power creep is...wait. Why did it take me this long to realize that I should have explained how power scaling works? I'm a scientist and it's like math. What happened?"

Lord Beerus: "Liquiir happened." She smiled and nodded.

Bulma: "Liquiir happened."

Lord Liquiir: "I happened," he said, wrapping his torso up with his tails like he's a present and hugging a couple of them.

Lord Beerus: "You look minty fresh."

Lord Liquiir: "I feel minty fresh." I moved closer to him and draped my arm around his shoulders. One of his tails entwined with mine and then he rested his head on my shoulder.

Bulma: "So sweet. Continuing from where I left off, power creep is a term that pretty much means that as a series progresses, the newer 'Models', if you will, are faster and stronger than the older models. For example, in DBZ, the Saiyans arrive, stronger than anything Earth had ever seen. Then we get to Namek and we have stronger enemies still. We have Dodoria, Zarbon, the Ginyu Force, and then Freeza. After that we get 17, 18, Cell, and then Majin Buu and his endless amount of forms."

Lord Beerus: "You can look at history and see power creep in action. Do you remember horses? People rode them before cars came around. Speaking of cars, if you told someone back when they were still brand new that they'd eventually be able to go from 0-60 miles per hour in two seconds, they'd call you insane."

Lord Liquiir: "And just like how transportation evolved, weapons evolved. First there were clubs and rocks and spears. Next there were swords and arrows. After that are muskets and flintlocks. Today we have glocks and RPGs and fully automatic shotguns and assault rifles with scopes and thermal imaging."

Bulma: "In fifty years, maybe you'll have Spartan Lasers from Halo. Hopefully all of the examples we gave helped with your understanding of what power creep is. To reiterate, power scaling is that simple equation we used before. Power creep is that as something progresses, the newer things are better and stronger." I yawned.

Lord Beerus: "That was quick and easy. For our next topic, I think we should talk about how Toriyama doesn't understand math."

Bulma: "I love the sound of that."

Lord Liquiir: "That will be a fun show. And remember, don't be afraid to ask us questions. We'll be more than happy to answer them to the best of our abilities.

Lord Beerus: "With that out of the way, here's a sneak peek for the ninth chapter of OCAK."

Korn: "My father is indeed incredibly knowledgeable. However, there is one being in the multiverse who boasts omniscience. Or so it's said. She doesn't talk to people she doesn't know."

Videl: "Then why do people say she's omniscient?"

Lord Beerus: "Rumors. You know how it goes. They spin out of control. People say 'She lives on a book planet and spends all of her time reading. That must make her omniscient!' That's the logic of the masses."

Gohan: "A book planet?!" Gohan said excitedly. "That sounds-"

Lord Beerus: "Boring?"

Gohan: "-amazing!"

Lord Beerus: "If you say so." He looked at me, clearly annoyed with my attitude. He's a scholar. What other reaction would he have?

Gohan: "What's wrong with books?"

Lord Beerus: "Nothing. Nothing at all. Books are great. They don't hide anything from you. A book planet isn't the first thing that comes to mind when I think of exciting things, though. The rush of battle is what comes to mind. Being in the thick of combat. Being a warrior. Not turning a page."

Lord Liquiir: "Beerus, books are a mighty and merciless adversary. They can inflict serious damage. Have you never seen scars from a paper cut? Or someone strain their eyes while reading?" I coughed and cleared my throat to keep myself from laughing.

Lord Beerus: "Stop trying to make me laugh." I casted my gaze over to Gohan and sighed. "If you want, I can bring you to the book planet one of these days," I told him in a defeated tone. He brightened up. "It's in Universe 3, so you better come prepared."

Gohan: "I will. Thank you." He looked at Videl. "Would you and Pan like to come with us?"

Videl: "I don't think Pan would enjoy it that much. I think she'd get cranky because there wouldn't be anything to do except read." Using your kid as an excuse to avoid going somewhere. That's clever. I can't wait until I can do that with my kid.

Gohan: "You're right. Maybe in a couple of years when she's learning how to read."

Videl: "You can bring Bulma. She'd go nuts over this planet."

Gohan: "That's a good idea. I'll ask her."

Lord Beerus: "You better tell her that it could be months before I take you. Liquiir and I still have to plan literally everything about our life mate ceremony, have the ceremony, and enjoy our honeymoon."

Gohan: "I understand. I'm not in any rush. I do have just one more question."

Lord Beerus: "What?

Gohan: "Do you know what she looks like? The person who's omniscient?"

Lord Beerus: "No. Korn?"

Pan: "Corn!" Pan tried throwing some baby corn at me, but it didn't get very far.

Lord Beerus: "That's not the corn I meant, but thank you." Korn, the person, chuckled.

Korn: "I knew it was merely a matter of time until something like that happened. Now then, I have never seen her for myself, so I can only give you a very general description of her. She is a dragoness." We all stared at him, then at each other, and then back at him.

Lord Beerus: "That's it?"

Korn: "Yes. As I said, a very general description."

Lord Beerus: "You weren't kidding."

Bulma: "First off, yes to the book planet. Secondly, aren't we evil? We're not going to show you why Liquiir was so happy in the beginning of this show. You'll have to read the ninth chapter when it comes out, which should be before the end of the year." She's eyeing the bag next to her. "Before we go, I have some presents for you two." She picked up the bag, took out a couple of small boxes wrapped in red and blue wrapping paper respectively, and gave them to us.

Lord Beerus: "Thank you."

Lord Liquiir: "Thank you."

Bulma: "You're both welcome." She sat down next to Liquiir. "Beerus, open yours first, Beerus. I really want you to go first, Beerus." I ripped a piece of the wrapping paper off, crumpled it into a ball, and threw it at her.

Lord Beerus: "Stop being annoying. That's Liquiir's job." She ripped off some paper, crumpled it into a ball, and threw it at me.

Bulma: "You stop." I returned fire.

Lord Beerus: "Make me." She returned fire.

Bulma: "Make me." Liquiir gently grabbed our arms to keep us from throwing anything else.

Lord Liquiir: "Excuse me, I didn't dress up like this to get balls in my face. "

Bulma: "Pun intended?"

Lord Liquiir: "So much it hurts."

Lord Beerus: "Do you know what doesn't hurt?" I used my claw to cut open the box. It's a..a very unexpected gift. "This scale model of me." I held up toy me. It's six inches tall and it has a cataclysm orb in its paw. It looks like you can shoot the orb by pressing a button on the toy's back.

Lord Liquiir: "Aw! This toy version of you is so cute!" I handed it to Liquiir and put the box on the floor. "I don't think the ears are big enough, but everything else is accurate." I groaned at that.

Lord Beerus: "Thank you, Bulma. That's honestly one of the best toys I've ever gotten."

Bulma: "You're welcome, but toy Beerus didn't come alone." Liquiir put down toy me in his lap and tore into his present so fast that you would think it has food in there and he's starving.

Lord Liquiir: "A toy Liquiir for toy Beerus! They need to kiss." After Liquiir put the box next to him on his left, he made toy us kiss. Toy Liquiir has a detachable red ki sword and his nine tails. Unlike toy me which is smooth plastic, toy Liquiir has felt on him to give him a soft and pillowy look and feel. It's concentrated the most in his chest and his nine tails. I rubbed the tails between my fingers.

Lord Beerus: "These are very high quality," I noted.

Bulma: "I made sure they were."

Lord Liquiir: "Thank you, Bulma."

Bulma: "You're welcome." Liquiir cleared his throat.

Lord Liquiir: "You are now life mates," he declared in a deep voice. "Enjoy your honeymoon, you crazy kids." He put them back in the box and closed it. "If I knew you were going to give us presents, especially something this amazing, I would have gotten you something. I promise that I'll make it up to you."

Lord Beerus: "I promise as well."

Bulma: "I can't wait to see what you guys me." I nodded.

Lord Beerus: "I believe that's it for our show. Again, the next chapter of OCAK should be uploaded sometime before the end of the year. Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah. Happy Kwanzaa. Happy New Year, which will hopefully be infinitely better. Happy whatever other holiday is celebrated around this time. Stay safe and goodbye."

Lord Liquiir: "Have a great holiday!"

Bulma: "See you all later!" We all waved goodbye.

I don't really have much of anything to say that hasn't already been said. This year has been terrible. It sucked. Here's to 2021. I look forward to when we can finally say "Fuck off, coronavirus!" forever and put this awful year behind us.As always, until the next show, D.F.T.B.A.

(Don't Forget To Be Awesome!) Have an awesome day!