AN: So, funny story. I thought it would take me two years tops to reach this part of the plot.
Many thanks to my beta-readers: GwendolynStacy, Duesal Bladesinger, fishebake, To Mockingbird.
"Yosh! Harissen-san, you won't get back in shape by laying on the ground!"
"Just let me die here," Conrad groaned, as every muscle in his body felt like it was on fire and his hair seemed to be made of sweat and sticking everywhere.
"Such unyouthful words! You shouldn't speak like that, Harissen-san!" Gai reprimanded him.
"... you do know that I'm older than you, right?" he asked, opening one of his eyes to glare at his personal trainer.
"Age is but a number! All that matters is maintaining a youthful attitude! Just look at your students!"
Ah, yes. Looking at someone really young for evidence on how to feel young. Conrad couldn't fault that logic. Except for one little detail.
"Ta'Sava can't feel his legs," Ta'Sava moaned in pain. Beta and Sven were in similar conditions, sprawled on the ground and looking like they too wished for the sweet, sweet release of death.
"Master Conrad, why are we here?" Beta asked, heaving. "It's your physical therapy, not ours!"
"Thankfully for your youthful, generous teacher一"
"Generous!?" Sven protested, getting slightly up to look at the shinobi. "He wants twenty percent of everything we sell at the store!"
"一the doctors at the hospital were able to shorten the long, harrowing and painful physical therapy thanks to the magnificent potions he brewed and their use of skillful medical ninjutsu!" Gai continued, apparently ignoring Sven's words. "This is not physical therapy anymore, it's physical training! Something that I felt was necessary to share with you, his youthful students. And he agreed."
"I don't want to be his student anymore, can I quit?" Sven asked, actually raising a hand.
"No quitting until we're back in Skyrim, Sven," Conrad answered. The young Imperial was probably just joking. Probably. Besides, the exercise would be good for them.
And if he had to suffer, he wouldn't do so alone.
"But if you really feel tired, I suppose we could take a short break," Gai suggested, raising everyone's hope… before producing a few green vials from his flak jacket. "To drink these stamina potions you made! They are an amazing training tool, removing fatigue and allowing us to train again and again! And they're green, the best color of all!"
Everyone but Gai groaned.
"Ta'Sava can't believe he sold those with a bulk discount," the young Khajiit moaned.
Conrad didn't hate mornings, he loathed them. Especially since he had to wake up earlier than usual to meet with Maito Gai.
By the Nine, he needed some coffee. The Akaviri were lucky. Before coming here, he had drunk it only a handful of times in his life. Now he could drink it every day, possibly spiked with some stamina potion.
He wasn't surprised to see a still drowsy Naruto having breakfast in the kitchen. After all, he had to wake up early too to meet with his teammates and their sensei. What caused him to do a double take though, was seeing said teammates sitting at the kitchen table in a similar state, still wearing pajamas.
"'Morning, 'ncle," Naruto mumbled, to which the other children looked up and greeted him as well, albeit in a much more coherent way.
He gave them a nod and proceeded to make himself some coffee, pretending everything was normal. It was only when he went to fetch the potion to put in his coffee, away from their sight, that he stared in the direction of the kitchen.
"They had a sleepover," someone said. Turning around, he saw Sven emerging from his and Ta'Sava's room. It looked like his apprentice didn't appreciate mornings as well. "They had a few while you were… indisposed."
"Sleepovers?" he asked as he took a sip. Nothing like a stamina potion that tasted like coffee to start a new day.
Sven looked towards the kitchen, where, judging by the noises, the children were arguing about something, before lowering his voice. "After the attack, Naruto was a mess. The other boy, too. Their friends just… refused to leave them alone. So, you know… sleepovers."
"Friends?"
"Sometimes it's just the three of them, sometimes there's others. Either here or at someone's else's place. If I'm right, the next time should be at the girl's place."
Conrad glanced back at the children again, kind of wishing he had one of those 'camera' things to capture the moment in time. Then he finished his drink and went to take a shower, to get ready for the meeting with Gai.
Today was leg day.
"What did you say this is called?" Conrad asked, looking at his plate skeptically.
"Katsudon. Here, take some more," Chouza said, serving the Nord some extra food. Inoichi had to suppress a smirk at how the man's eyes widened at seeing the Akimichi-sized serving now sitting on his plate.
"Thanks," Conrad said politely, looking around the table before frowning. "Where's the booze?"
"Sorry, Conrad. No alcohol, at least not until the kids have finished," Inoichi told him, gesturing to the table where all the children were eating.
They had wanted to organize a dinner like this for weeks, but then Minato's brother had got himself tangled with a S-Rank shinobi and got hospitalized as a result.
Once they had heard that he had awakened, Shikaku had muttered something about 'troublesome blonds getting everyone worried' and Chouza had started to ask how quickly they could start preparing the food.
Obviously, Naruto had been invited as well, and Conrad's apprentices too, who didn't seem that displeased with having to sit at a table filled with children younger than them.
"Don't worry," Inoichi continued. "Their team has a mission tomorrow. If you want, we can have a drink after they go to bed."
"Do they? Nothing dangerous, I hope?" the man asked, after glancing at the children for a moment.
"No, just a C-rank. The most they could have to deal with are some bandits, and Asuma, their sensei, is a very skilled shinobi. They'll be fine."
"From what Inoichi told us, banditry is a large problem in your homeland, isn't that right Harissen-san?" Shikaku asked.
"It was worse during the war, and the years immediately after it," he conceded. "But the remaining bandit warlords are… persistent."
"And your daimyos won't do anything to stop them?"
"Jarls, Shikaku," Inoichi corrected, making a mental note that the way-too-thin dossiers about Skyrim and Tamriel needed to be expanded. Maybe he could try to ambush Conrad after Gai had rendered him too tired to make excuses.
"They try… well, most of them try," Conrad trailed off before continuing, and Inoichi figured that there was a story there. "But they're not the only problem in the Holds."
"Such as?" Shikaku asks nonchalantly. Inoichi shot his friend a look, knowing exactly what he was doing. They had not invited the man to dinner to grill him for intel, after all. But Conrad didn't seem to notice or care.
"Where to begin?" The Nord let out a humorless bark at that, putting down the food he was about to eat. "The peace after the civil war was… messy. The Stormcloaks that didn't surrender harassed the Empire for years after. Even today, people can't or won't address the rampant corruption throughout the Holds. Daedric cults hide in cities and countryside, but that's kind of the norm for Tamriel I'm afraid. The Princes are always meddling, one way or the other. Not to mention the Thalmor."
"The Thalmor?" Shikaku wondered out loud, and Inoichi had to admit that he was a bit curious. He had heard the name before, after Conrad had drunk a few too many bottles of sake. Usually along what had to be a few creative swear words.
"They're a faction that rose to power in the Summerset Isles after a crisis had weakened the Empire. They managed to either annex or convince other provinces to secede from the Empire, further crippling it. If that wasn't enough, they tried to make the civil war in Skyrim last as long as possible, to make both sides easy pickings for later," Conrad quickly explained, his hands tightening around his glass as if he wanted to strangle it.
Inoichi and the others nodded in understanding, even if they were still clearly missing way too much context. Coups or playing two sides against each other were hardly something they had not heard of before, in fact, shinobi were often hired to help through them.
"Are they your enemies, then?" Inoichi asked. The Nord immediately turned towards him, his eyes as cold as ice.
"They've been killing my people for the past four decades," he said, voice low. "Damn right they're my enemies."
"Yes, I got that. I meant to ask if you're actively at war with them," he clarified.
"Me? Yes. The Empire? No."
That... didn't really make sense to Inoichi. And he wasn't the only one. "These Thalmor kill your people but the Empire you come from, that you're part of, won't protect them?" Chouza asked for all of them.
"The Thalmor are targeting any who worship Talos, a god of my people. Worshipping Talos has become illegal after the end of the Great War. Don't ask. That's a very long story," Conrad quickly added, seeing as they were about to ask a question.
"Maybe we'd like to hear a long story, Chouza pointed out.
"Did you lose this war and your leaders had to accept such terms?" Shikaku asked him. At that, Conrad shook his head sadly.
"No, we didn't lose, but it does feel that way. We didn't win, either."
Inoichi figured he could always ask for more details about this Great War at a later date. "Alright, but why are these Thalmor so bent on forbidding people to worship their god?"
"Because they have long memories," Conrad said after remaining silent for a moment.
"What do you mean?"
"They're elves," he continued, clearly realizing that they didn't have any idea what he was talking about. "Look, imagine... imagine someone that ages so slowly that they may as well be immortal from our perspective. Imagine an entire nation of people like that, and how arrogant they could be. One day, though, here comes a human, who unleashes something terrible against them... all in order to conquer them. Then, they have to see this man become the Emperor of Tamriel, become a god, and all the terrible things he did were forgotten over time."
Shikaku sent Inoichi a meaningful look. Inoichi gave one of his own, inviting him to keep an open mind. In a world where the Daedric Princes existed, what was the existence of immortals or people becoming gods?
Wait.
"Your emperor is a god?" Inoichi had to ask. He had thought nothing about Tamriel would surprise him at this point. He was wrong.
"No, the founder of the Empire became a god, and since he was a Nord, he's very important to us."
"What's the 'terrible' thing he did?" Chouza asked.
Conrad sighed. "We're gonna need some drinks for this... let me tell you about Tiber Septim, and about Numidium, the Walk-Brass..."
The alchemical lab his apprentices had set up while he had been indisposed was… adequate.
It was little more than a shed which he could have sworn Inoichi's extended family had used to put some gardening supplies in the past. Still, they had managed to set up multiple working stations with tools, both finely crafted or improvised using Akaviri utensils or other equipment. And of course, the hose outside was very useful when it came to cleaning up or stopping any fires.
"We're almost out of fire salts, Master Conrad," Sven told him, continuing to check their inventory as Shizune and Tsunade chatted with his fellow magelings.
"I'll take care of it tonight," he assured, writing down on his notepad to summon and harvest a few fire atronachs later. Away from the lab. While he was at it, he made another one about trying to find a surrogate or alternative ingredient that didn't require him to kill something that threw fire when pissed off.
He went back to look at the rest of his notes. Which were messier than usual, but right now he was mostly making conjectures. Would it even work if he used it as a spell? He doubted he could pull it off as it was intended.
Maybe an array of runes between two points, one for arrival and one for一
"So, how do they work?" Tsunade asked as she looked at the many different types of potions arranged on the shelves, ready to be taken to the front of the store.
"Magic," he answered without looking up.
"Come on, lightweight. That's not a good answer and you know it," Tsunade said, turning towards him. Conrad grit his teeth. He really hated that nickname.
"How about I explain it to you while you create some yourself?" he offered, pointing at the tools on one of the tables.
"That's fine by me, but I get to keep them," she decided. "I want to examine them in a proper lab."
Oh, so she was insulting his alchemical lab now. Sure, technically it was the magelings', but his students' actions and decisions reflected on him.
"That would mean that you'll manage to prepare one on your first try," Conrad ground out, handing her a bundle of recipes from the small bookshelf.
"I think I'll manage," Tsunade assured him, snatching the pieces of paper before throwing a look at the workstation. "What's the blender for?"
"It's faster than grinding everything with mortar and pestle," Beta explained as she kept working on her own project.
"Wait, this recipe says that it needs… wheat and butterfly wings? Seriously?" she asked, incredulous.
"Yes. Some of the plants, bugs and other ingredients we normally use in Skyrim aren't available here, but we found a species of butterfly whose wings have similar properties to one back home. You'll also need… Shizune?" Conrad called, which seemed to surprise the woman for some reason. Ah, right, she had not been around for long so she didn't know he didn't use their honorifics. Well, that was her problem, not his. "Can you fetch that jar right above you? No, the other one."
"It just sounds… too easy," Tsunade grumbled as she picked up a bundle of dry wheat.
"It's not. The properties of the ingredients must be properly extracted, mixed and processed. Otherwise everyone would be able to heal from their wounds by eating bread or heal most sicknesses by munching on garlic," Conrad told her, gesturing to all the equipment and the various vials.
"Still, these ingredients aren't either rare or pricey," she reasoned. "You'd think that someone would've found out about such applications before."
"Maybe someone did," Conrad said, giving up writing down more notes. He couldn't work on them if he kept being interrupted. "Then it was forgotten."
"What do you mean, Harissen-san?" Shizune asked as she started preparing the ingredients. It was refreshing to see how precise she was, a far cry from the sloppiness of his students back at the college. Not that he was in charge of Alchemy over there, but still.
"How to explain this… ?" he wondered out loud. "Konoha is less than one hundred years old, yes?"
"Yes, my grandfather and Madara Uchiha founded it," Tsunade replied. "What does that have to do with my question?"
"Humor me. How old is the oldest city on the continent? The still inhabited ones, I mean," Conrad specified. Not that he wouldn't have liked to explore some ruins in Akavir. He was just trying to make a point unrelated to that.
She didn't seem convinced but answered none the less. "I'm not sure about the rest of the Elemental Nations, but I think that the capital of Fire Country is six hundred years old."
"... six hundred years old? Really?" he asked, utterly unimpressed.
"It wasn't always the capital, obviously," she continued. "And there was a short period in which it wasn't even part of Fire Country, but then一"
"The city I live in was founded over four millennia ago," Conrad interrupted. It was actually closer to five but he wasn't trying to boast or give a lesson of Skyrim's history. "And it's not even the oldest city in Tamriel. Do you see what I mean?"
Tsunade gave him an impatient look. "How is that related to the fact that we lacked what is considered basic knowledge in your homeland?"
"I wouldn't call alchemy 'basic knowledge'," Conrad argued. "Although it's easier to learn compared to other magical一"
"The point, lightweight," she interrupted him.
"The last time our people met, Tamriel and Akavir… or the Elemental Nations, if you prefer… it was at war. You conquered us, and then centuries later when Tamriel tried to invade, it was a disaster. There's no way that your ancestors didn't learn something from occupying our land or by kicking us back into the sea."
"But then…" Tsunade started, understanding where he was going with this.
"Yes, something must have happened. Some kind of disaster or war, which caused the loss of this knowledge, and who knows what else," he explained his theory. "It would also explain the young age of your oldest settlements."
The scholar in him wept at how few historical sources were in these lands that went back further than one hundred years. They didn't seem to even have much of an oral tradition. Because keeping secrets was part of it. Maybe he should go ask a not-shinobi city一
"Yeah, yeah, this is all very fascinating but that's not why I am here," Tsunade said dismissively. How come he was the barbarian? "Let's talk about the healing ones."
"And about how they work," he finished for her, knowing where she was going with this.
"How does the potion heal the body? Does it speed up the natural healing process? Does it just create new cells and tissue? How does it know what to do without a guiding force?"
Conrad purposefully took a moment before answering. "Magic," he repeated. "And before you tell me again that's not a good answer, that's all there is. Imagine it like a spell, or a jutsu, fueled by its components: a solution and reagents. The more pure the solution, and how many reagents share the same properties, the better."
"That still doesn't really answer my questions, and many more I may have. Like any side effects these draughts may cause," Tsunade kept working, clearly unsatisfied.
"Feel free to visit some wounded at that hospital of yours," Conrad told her. "Give them some healing potions, watch how they work. I'm sure that seeing a wound close itself would make you understand."
He expected some more questions, or at least a remark or some snark. Instead, she kept working on her potion, checking the various recipes in silence.
"Harissen-san, forgive me if I ask, but... isn't your next physical examination scheduled for tomorrow?" Shizune asked, catching their attention.
"Yes, why?" he asked, not seeing why she had brought it up.
"Tsunade-shishou... if you wish to examine the long-term effects of the potions on a human body, why not visit Harissen-san? He used his potions for decades, after all," she suggested, meeting her teacher's eyes. For a few seconds, they looked at each other in silence, like they were having a silent conversation just between the two of them. One which Conrad lacked any context for.
"Fine, I'll give the lightweight a physical myself then," Tsunade conceded. "But I'm sure it won't hold many surprises for us."
"That's… that can't be right."
"I told you," Shizune said, sounding just a little bit smug.
"I don't think that's medically possible," Tsunade shook her head in disbelief, unable to tear her eyes away from his body.
"You know, I always thought that I'd enjoy being half-naked in front of two women," he grumbled. "You're ruining that for me. Thank you."
"Oh, you're welcome, Harissen-san," Shizune smiled. These two had spent the last few minutes prodding him with a few tools and mumbling about his pulse and his blood pressure. Whatever that meant. Then they asked him to take off his shirt and the older one, Tsunade, had started gawking at him.
He thought that around these parts they were used to seeing scars.
"How are you even alive?!" Tsunade asked, reaching for some of the ones on his chest. "Those should've killed you on the spot!"
"Ah, well, that's a bit of a long story," He remembered how he got those. He'd been young and cocky, and then he was seeing the stinking maw of a dragon. From the inside. "Let's just say that it's good to always have a very strong healing potion at hand and a healer in your party just to be sure."
"... party?" she questioned, confused.
Right. Some things didn't translate literally. "Not a feast, a group of people that travel together."
"... let's just get this over with," the medic sighed before reaching for him with her palms. They started shimmering green. "I'll now examine you with a medical ninjutsu一"
"Oh, you can examine me anytime you want," he immediately said, unable to resist. Given how speechless she was, it was worth it.
"That can't be right," she whispered, moving her hands over his shoulders.
"No, it is. It's an open offer, by the way," he cleared up, glancing at Shizune. The younger woman turned bright red and looked away. Heh. He still had it.
"That's not what I'm talking about," Tsunade said, shooting him an unamused look. "Shizune? Come here. Do you see it, too?"
The younger medic stepped closer, her hands glowing a pale green as well. She moved them over his chest before a confused expression settled on her face. "I… I'm not sensing anything?"
"Exactly," Tsunade said gravely. Shizune's eyes widened a bit as she seemed to realise something. Conrad started to feel a bit worried.
"Is something wrong…?" he asked. After all, worried, confused expressions were not a good sign when being examined by a healer.
"Are there any Hyuuga working in the hospital?" Tsunade asked, ignoring him.
"I believe one of our nurses is? She's assigned to the emergency room一"
"Then go to call her!" she ordered, pointing at the door. Her student hurried out of the room.
Conrad remained silent for a few seconds. That didn't sound good. Was he dying? He didn't feel like he was dying. He knew what dying felt like. No, it was something else.
"Is something wrong?" he repeated. Tsunade turned to glare at him.
"Damn right, something's wrong. You don't have chakra pathways!"
Conrad just stared at her for a moment. "And that's… bad?"
"I hate hospitals," Conrad said to the room. He had spent way too long there, and more importantly, he could still feel all the ways they had prodded and examined him like he was some rare and exotic bug under their lens.
Which he guessed he kinda was, from their point of view.
"We know. You said that. Multiple times," Beta grumbled from the couch. Right. Because the shinobi had remembered that they had multiple specimens from Tamriel at hand and figured they should give them a look, too. And now his students were annoyed. With him.
Life wasn't fair.
"Now you know how Ta'Sava felt," the Khajiit told them.
"What was that all about anyway?" Sven asked. "That lady seemed very angry."
"She was pissed that the other doctors didn't notice first," Beta offered solemnly.
"Reassuring," Sven snorted. "Shouldn't we be worried about the fact that the Akaviri have a completely extra organ system?"
Beta frowned for a moment. "I'm not sure if it's actually an organ一"
"Ta'Sava is more worried about the lack of not-humans," the only Khajiit on the continent interrupted.
"How about why the Akaviri have that?" Sven argued, being a young wizard in front of an enigma.
"Who cares?" Conrad countered, trying to suppress his scholarly curiosity. "It's not like we need it."
"Yeah, but they do!" Beta pointed out. "They told us that shinobi can die if they exhaust their chakra reserves! That's crazy!"
Not that crazy at all, Conrad thought. If chakra was the byproduct of the body energy united with the spiritual one, it wasn't a surprise that shinobi would drop like flies if they overdid it. The poor bastards were literally casting spells with their own lifeforce on the line. He'd stick to magicka, thank you very much.
But still… where in Oblivion did it even come from?
"Also… your brother had one, Master. How did that even happen? What if it happens to us?!"
"Minato arrived here as an infant, his body was still developing. And he also lived here for over twenty years, I think we'll be fine by the time we leave."
Nevermind the fact that the chakra system needed to be trained from childhood, with constant practice just to be able to use it, according to Tsunade's ranting.
Maybe there was something in the water. Or in the rice. Or maybe it was connected to that seemingly all-powerful wizard from a millennia ago. Most things seemed to be, in Akavir.
"Master Conrad?" Beta's voice put a stop on his train of thoughts. Seeing he was giving her his full attention, she continued. "There's a thing... we had a request to make."
"What is it?" he couldn't help but ask.
The three of them looked at each other, exchanging meaningful glances and nodding before turning to look at him at the same time, making an united front.
"Master, lately we've been feeling like we don't really have enough time to focus on our studies... the magical ones, I mean. Between the store, and your... 'physical therapy'."
"Which Ta-Sava and his friends are forced to be part of…" the Khajiit added. Which wasn't really fair in Conrad's opinion, that hadn't been his call. It was Gai's. He had just allowed it to happen, and these youngsters really needed it anyway.
"Simply put, Master, we ask that you cover part of our shifts at the potion store, during which we'll be able to focus on our studies," Beta continued, not looking away from Conrad's eyes even once. Which meant that she had prepared for this.
"That sounds like a reasonable request," he nodded. "What do I get in return?"
"The satisfaction of being a good teacher that wishes to see his pupils flourish and grow," she deadpanned. He gave her an unimpressed look before she kept talking. "Also, we'll give you the less busy shifts of the week, which will give you time to devise those experiments of yours. And a further two percent cut from the store."
Conrad had to admit… he was slightly impressed. "Five," he said.
"Three," Ta'Sava countered. Conrad smiled. Apparently, the little magelings knew how to haggle.
"Deal."
Conrad had to concede one thing. When the shinobi listened to him, they were actually good learners. The laboratory Tsunade Senju had assembled in the last few days was one of the best he had ever seen, with some tools that had apparently been converted or designed just for this particular use.
The two of them, master and apprentice, were smart. Really smart, and they never asked the same question twice. He was… reluctantly impressed.
"The more I learn about this alchemy… the more I notice how inefficient it is," Tsunade suddenly said as she put away the latest batch of samples.
"What?" Conrad asked. He wasn't used to such casual insults to his work.
"Don't get me wrong, some of the things you can do with it are downright revolutionary, and not just in the medical field."
"Some?" he repeated, feeling personally affronted.
"But you have to drink a large vial of liquid, which tastes fouler than any medicine I know of. And I know many," she pointed out. "You also have to carry a bunch of large vials with you."
"Of course I carry them, how am I supposed to use them during a一"
"During a battle?" she interrupted him. Rude. "Yes, that's the other point I wanted to make. Drinking a large vial of liquid during a fight seems very risky. Your opponent is not going to just stand still while you take a drink."
"I am aware of that, thank you for pointing out something that was obvious to me for the last twenty years of my life." Conrad couldn't see where she was going with this. Every adventurer worth their salt learned quickly when was the right time to drink a potion without being stabbed or worse.
"And in those twenty years, you didn't try to figure out a better way to do it?" she had the gall to ask him. Despite Conrad's obvious annoyance at that question, she kept talking. "There must be a way to obtain the same results by refining the potion further."
"Like what?"
"Pills, for example. Smaller, easier to consume and to carry. We already have something similar. A stimulant we call 'soldier pills' but they're used only in dire situations because they cause a lot of strain on the body," she explained. Conrad actually started wondering about that… despite the fact that the only pills he had had any experience so far had been aspirins.
"I can see how it could be helpful, but I doubt you'll be able to adapt alchemy that way. Not without years of research."
"Bold of you to assume it will take me that long, lightweight" Tsunade boasted. Conrad's eyes narrowed. Now she was just trying to piss him off.
"Considering you didn't even know of alchemy until一"
"What about a syringe?" Shizune spoke up, gaining the attention of both. "We'd have to test if it has the same effects administered in the bloodstream as when digested, but if we assume it does..."
Tsunade hummed, considering her apprentice's words. "If it does, we could ask the R&D department to figure out some kind of portable syringe, ready to use on the field."
"And if we could begin to reduce the amount of potion required to obtain the desired effects..." Shizune continued, but Conrad toned the rest out. He was starting to feel like he wasn't needed for this conversation anymore.
That was when he heard the unmistakable sound of his nephew rushing inside. He had become almost accustomed to it, but it was still a memorable sound. What surprised him, along with the other two adults in the room, was the swirling ball of energy he was holding in his hand.
"Old Hag!" the boy shouted, holding the glowing sphere high. "I've done it! I've一Oh, hey Uncle."
"Boy, indoor voice," Conrad said in greeting. His eyes, though, were locked on the spinning blue globe in the child's hands. It felt… familiar, somehow. But he couldn't place it.
"Sorry," Naruto said bashfully, before looking at Tsunade with a determined expression. "I did it, Old Hag. I completed the Rasengan, which means I won the bet!"
Tsunade stared at him for a long moment, before letting out a snort. "I can see that, brat. I'm not blind."
"Which means that you'll have to一"
She held up a hand to stop him. "But please, tell me why you rushed inside here with a destructive A-Rank jutsu in your hand."
"Huuuuh... to show you that I won the bet?"
"What bet?" Conrad wondered out loud. Nobody answered him.
"Yes, yes, you won the bet. Now cut it out before you damage something."
"But一"
"You can show it off to your uncle later. Outside of my lab," she said in a very fed up voice. Naruto kinda pouted at that, but obeyed, letting the sphere die off and dissipate into nothing.
"What bet?" Conrad repeated.
"Let's just say that I'll have to stay in Konoha for a while," Tsunade had the decency to answer. Conrad could've sworn that she was sounding almost resigned, and… amused, for some reason.
"You decide something like that through a bet with a twelve-year-old?" he couldn't help but ask.
"I think we're done for today, lightweight," Tsunade said, ignoring his question. "I probably have to go speak with Sarutobi-sensei soon, anyway."
After saying their farewells and Naruto basking in the compliments Shizune gave him, for some reason, the two of them started walking home.
"That was the thing you've been practicing in the last month, right?" Conrad asked the boy. "The one that Minato came up with."
"Yeah! It's called Rasengan!" Naruto exclaimed enthusiastically. "It's... it's super hard. I had to complete the last step using a clone."
"You can't just keep throwing clones at the problem, Naruto," he sighed.
"It's worked so far," the boy reasoned. The worst part was that he wasn't wrong. An argument for another time, then.
"So... you start spinning your chakra in your hand, form the ball and then... you throw it?" he asked.
"Huuh, no? I have to slam it against my target," Naruto explained, mimicking the gesture.
Conrad felt his respect for Minato die a little, right there. What kind of self-respecting spellcaster would come up with a glowing ball of destruction and then run at their enemy with it?
Ninja, not spellcaster, he reminded himself. And maybe he had a bias caused by an overreliance on fireballs and lightning bolts to blow up things. But the idea of not being able to see the logical advantage in a long-range sphere of destruction didn't make sense to him.
"I see," he said, avoiding to voice out loud his thoughts.
"... can we have ramen?" Naruto ventured. "To celebrate?"
"Alright… I suppose we can have dinner at Ichiraku's," Conrad conceded. It obviously meant a lot for Naruto, which was understandable given how his father had indirectly passed it to him. Not celebrating such a thing would've been a very shitty thing.
He still preferred fireballs and lightning bolts, though.
"You know what? The store needs a name," Beta said all of sudden as they were checking the store's inventory.
"What?" Conrad couldn't help but ask. Where had that even come from?
"The store needs a name," she repeated. "Every good store has a name. And a sign."
"Why would we need a sign? We're the only alchemy shop in Konoha," he pointed out, leaving out the fact that maybe they were the only one in all of Akavir.
"It's a matter of principle, Master Conrad. Most customers still think that we're an extension of the Yamanaka's flower shop."
"Well... Inoichi owns the building," he observed. Thankfully, the man had not asked him to pay rent. Yet.
"That makes it even more important, we need to stand out on our own," she insisted. "How about 'Tamriel's Remedies'?"
"We don't really sell remedies, though," Conrad pointed out as he finished rearranging the vials on a shelf. He made a note about telling the magelings to produce less magicka potions; the ninja didn't need those anyway.
"Healing potions are remedies, and so are the ones that heal sickness," Beta argued.
"Yes, but we sell all kinds of potions, here."
"Alright, how about Tamriel's Concoctions?" she continued.
"I'd still avoid mentioning Tamriel. I'd have to answer questions from every shinobi that comes through that door."
"Why don't you pick a name, then?" Beta, huffed. Conrad thought about it for a moment.
"Potions."
His fellow Nord looked utterly disappointed. "... just 'Potions'?"
Conrad shrugged. "We don't need to stand out if there's no competition."
"Master, these experiments and plans of yours, well…" Beta trailed off, as she kept reading the notes Conrad had written in the last few days.
"What about them? It's not dark magic," he told her, seeing no problem with them since he had devised them in the first place.
"We're just concerned," Sven said. "I mean… some of these things are jealously guarded by the Synod and the College of Whispers. And others are… illegal."
"Sure, I'll admit that they're illegal in the Empire," Conrad nodded.
"Yes, I mean, the Levitation Act of 3E 421一"
"But we're not in the Empire right now, right?" he asked, interrupting the young wizard-to-be. Besides, the Act had not stopped the damned Telvanni from being able to do whatever they wanted in their towers for centuries anyway, so why should he?
The three magelings looked at each other, unsure. Although some looked more unsure than others.
"Look, I won't tell if you won't."
"We won't tell… if you agree to get a smaller cut from the store," Sven said slowly. "And teach us more spells."
At that, Ta'Sava and Beta nodded their approval. Conrad sighed, knowing when he was beaten.
Inhale, exhale. Ignore the burning sensation in his lungs. Inhale, exhale again.
People kept turning to stare at him as he ran past them. But he wasn't that surprised. After all, he was making as much noise as a cart full of pans and pots.
He needed to get used to wearing armor for a long time again, though. So here he was, running around the outskirts of Konoha wearing it.
"Yosh!" Gai exclaimed. Because of course Maito Gai had shown up as soon as Conrad had started to jog down the street. He had not left yet. "Hello, Harissen-san! I approve of your choice to train by yourself!"
"Thanks," Conrad answered without stopping, looking ahead. He had learned that it was best to just humor the man. Despite his… eccentricities… he was a very good trainer. A harsh and demanding one, too. Conrad would have dealt with that with no problem, had it not been for the nauseating cheerfulness on top of it.
"SO INSPIRING!" he exploded. Conrad wished he could say he was used to it by now, but that would make a liar of him. "YOU TOOK THE MATTER INTO YOUR OWN HANDS! SUCH PASSION! WITH WEIGHTS, EVEN! I ONLY WISH I WAS THERE TO HELP WHEN YOU MADE THIS YOUTHFUL DECISION!"
"Help?" Conrad had to ask, ignoring the ways some children were pointing at him.
"Of course!" Gai exclaimed at a slightly more normal volume, keeping up with Conrad with ease. Way too much ease. Damn shinobi. "I'd have gladly provided you with some starter weights for you to train with!"
"Starter weights?" he repeated, appalled. Sure, he wasn't wearing all the rest of his usual adventuring gear, but running around in heavy armor wasn't something to dismiss. Especially given his quick recovery.
"Do not worry, Harissen-san! This is a suitable beginning!" Gai smiled brightly. "I'm sure after more training you'll be able to carry much heavier weights! For longer and with much ease! That way you'll be faster once you don't wear them!"
"That's… that's not what I'm trying to do," he panted slightly. Running and talking wasn't as easy as Gai made it look.
"Oh, don't worry, Harissen-san! Even if you'll not be able to match a ninja in speed any time soon, you'll be able to train even harder than ever! That's the power of Youth!"
"Again with the youth thing," he grumbled. Conrad decided to ignore the part regarding him being inferior to shinobi. It was true, sure, but he felt like it was kinda rude to say it like that.
"Attuning yourself to the power of Youth starts with the right attitude, Harissen-san!" Gai half-yelled in a way that was probably meant to sound encouraging and helpful but that just rubbed Conrad the wrong way.
So he started running faster to not listen to Gai approving yet sort of insulting comments. Conrad knew that he couldn't shake off the shinobi if Gai decided to just follow him the whole morning, but he didn't care.
"YOSH! That's it, Harissen-san! That's the power of Youth!"
No, Conrad decided. This was the power of spite. And spite was one of the most powerful driving forces on Nirn.
The shop was bigger than Sasuke had expected. What he had not expected was finding Harissen-san sitting behind the counter, scribbling furiously and checking through multiple notebooks and scrolls, while occasionally muttering in his native tongue. He was so lost in whatever he was doing that he had not even heard the chime when Sasuke had opened the door.
After waiting for him to acknowledge his presence, Sasuke decided to clear his throat. That finally made him look up.
"Mmh? Oh, hello Sasuke. How can I help you?" he greeted him, and Sasuke felt his eyes twitch a little at being addressed so informally. But he had slept at the man's house as a guest, so he let it go. And at least Naruto's uncle remembered his name this time.
He greeted him curtly, and went straight to the point. "I'd like to purchase some potions."
Harissen-san gave him an odd look at that, and Sasuke realised that he probably said something very obvious since he had entered a shop. "Anything particular in mind?"
"Some of the healing ones… I'd say three," Sasuke said, having a look around as he walked closer to the counter. "And the same amount for the ones that make you feel not tired anymore."
"Three healing and stamina potions, alright," Harissen-san nodded, grabbing the vials from the counter. Then he grabbed another one, which had a yellow-orange liquid in it. "How about this one, too? It will make your muscles stronger... temporarily, that is."
Sasuke's eyes glanced at the price tag attached to it. He could afford it, but including the other six, it was getting too pricey for his taste. "Thanks, but no. It's too expensive."
"Oh, it's for free," the older man said, waving a hand away. "This once."
Sasuke's eyes narrowed. That didn't make sense, he had seen this man haggle for the price of a second-hand book. "Why?"
"Purely selfish reasons, I assure you," Harissen-san answered. "If you have that potion, it means that Naruto's team has that potion. And after what happened the other day, I'd rather stack the deck to favor the boy's survival."
Sasuke had to admit, that made sense. He just nodded and paid for his other potions, thanking the man.
"Take care, Sasuke," Harissen-san said casually, going back to his notebook, not noticing Sasuke's dislike at being treated so informally.
Inoichi closed the notebook and put it with the others, which had all been filled to the brim. His head throbbed.
"What kind of land do you live in?" he groaned.
"The Arena. That's what Tamriel is called, by some. Anyway一"
"No!" Inoichi interrupted before Conrad could start talking. "I've had enough with Tamriel history for today, thank you. Let's talk about something else. Anything else."
"Alright. What about our cultures, then?" the man had the gall to ask.
Inoichi huffed and got another notebook.
Conrad frowned at the scroll, frustrated. Maybe, if the Mages Guild of old and the Empire had not spent so much time regulating and then forbidding perfectly good spells that had nothing to do with necromancy, he wouldn't have to try to figure this out from scratch.
It would've been useful during his travels around Skyrim and beyond. To shorten them.
"How are you taller again?" a voice from the nearby room shouted. Conrad got up, to check what the commotion was about, while muttering that he should've known better than to try to do anything with young, easily distracted apprentices around.
"Ta'Sava can't control how much he'll grow up," the Khajiit protested. From the looks of it, the latest distraction was the increasing height difference between the two of them. Again. Ta'Sava looked somewhat embarrassed, though if it was because of how tall he was becoming一and as a result, how many clothes he was outgrowing一or because this was for some other issue.
He was young enough to have multiple growth spurts, yes, but now he almost reached Conrad's chin already. There was only one logical conclusion. "You're a Cathay-raht, aren't you?"
Ta'Sava's ears twitched in surprise. "Yes," he said, "how does Master Conrad know?"
"You're not bulky enough to be a Pahmar-raht. Your fur is different too," he simply explained. Which just made Ta'Sava look even more surprised. "Just so you know, I'll hold you responsible for any pains to my neck I'll have when I'll have to look up to speak with you."
"Ta'Sava will crouch, if that will help?"
"Wait, what's a Pahmar…?" Sven asked, unfamiliar with the word.
"A furstock of Khajiit. There's, well… many."
At that, there was a soft, amused grunting noise that caught everyone's attention.
"Seventeen legally recognized by the Empire," Beta said casually, too focused on her exercise to float a pot to notice how they were all looking at her. "If Ta'Sava is a Cathay-raht, he'll become the tallest among us."
Of course she would know, she had probably read every possible tome about the biology of the various races of Tamriel she could get her hands on.
"This is not the time to have a full lesson about Khajiit furstocks, but I'm sure that Ta'Sava will explain… while you keep working on your telekinesis," he ordered. As far as he was concerned, if they wanted to help him figure out levitation, these three had to prove to him that they would be able to catch each other should the experimental and untested spell end prematurely.
"Why didn't you tell us, anyway?" Sven asked as he sat back near his own pot.
The young Khajiit didn't answer immediately, silently focusing on levitating his own cooking equipment. But when he did he avoided everyone's eyes. "Ta'Sava didn't tell anyone because people here look at him funny already. He didn't want to look weirder."
Sven huffed a little, but didn't seem genuinely upset. "Don't worry about it, if anyone gives you trouble about who you are you can just growl at them. That should scare them away."
Ta'Sava looked up at his friend, unamused and ears flat… for two seconds. Then he couldn't help but snicker.
It had been a joke, but Sven wasn't totally wrong, Conrad reasoned. Cathay-raht were the size of a frigging werewolf. And almost as fast and strong.
"Back to work, you two," he told them.
"So the guy now can't see shit, he's stumbling around promising bloody murder and that's when he's trips on his friend's corpse, falling with his ass right on the一"
"Conrad, you said that this was a funny story," Inoichi groaned.
"You had to be there, I guess," Conrad shrugged, his attention back to his meal.
"I don't know, I think it was a bit funny," Chouza snickered. Shikaku didn't say anything, and slowly shook his head… but he was smirking. The traitor.
"So, do you have any good ones on Minato? Funny stories, I mean," the Nord asked.
"This should do," Conrad nodded, examining the two identical arrays his magic had traced on the ground.
"'Should'?" Sven asked skeptically. "Master, that doesn't sound safe."
"That's why I am the one activating this and you get to stand back and take notes while I speak," Conrad pointed out, picking up an apple from the basket. He pretended to not notice how his student took a few steps back. "Alright, attempt number sixteen. I changed the space between the glyphs, hopefully that will allow the damn runes that Minato stuck in my head and got me into this mess一"
"That doesn't really sound very scholarly, Master Conrad," the younger mage pointed out.
"It's not a thesis, Sven. I can speak however I want," Conrad grumbled for a moment. "Anyway. Hopefully it will allow them to interact with my own... arrangement. The runes are positioned to work as a starting and delivery point. To further stabilize the array, they contain a matrix aimed to pump as much magicka as possible through the runes, while distributing it equally一"
"By Julianos, how are you a teacher?" Sven muttered as he kept scribbling. Conrad didn't reply though, since his Imperial apprentice had voiced his frustrations during the attempts from one to fifteen. He had pretty much tuned him out by now.
Conrad placed the apple in the middle of the first array and touched the external ring of runes, focusing his magic to activate it. There was a blue-ish glow, and the fruit disappeared with a fizzle, reappearing in the second array just beside the first.
Then it exploded in a fiery death, splattering flaming apple pieces all over Conrad's clothes and the clearing. Sadly, it did not smell delicious.
Master and apprentice stared at the blackened soil where the apple had teleported to. Conrad sighed, it would take forever to take the smell of charred fruit from his tunic.
"Take a note, Sven... must reduce the amount of magicka. And fix a rune or two. And not use chickens in the experiments. Yet."
They warily looked at him, holding their weapons tightly. It had taken a long time for them to grasp how to wield them in a somewhat acceptable way, and he was sure the shinobi that tailed them every day were judging him for it.
"I'm waiting," Conrad told his students, looking at them expectantly. They still hesitated, despite insisting on being taught how to not get stabbed, or at least to put a good effort in avoiding such a thing.
He guessed they didn't realize it would involve training in melee combat.
Conrad sighed, deciding he had had enough. "If you don't come at me, I will."
At that, Beta, of all people, rushed at him. "Ysgramor!" she yelled out loud, her weapon high. Too high.
He raised his own training stick just enough to let her crash into its tip, stomach first. She crumpled down, coughing and moaning in pain, but at least she was still holding on her own wooden sword. Bok-something, the shinobi called them.
"Good enthusiasm, terrible form. You're dead," he stated out loud. At that, Beta groaned a bit more. He looked at his two other magelings, who were still rooted on the spot. "What did she do wrong?"
"Beta charged the Dragonborn with a stick?" Ta'Sava offered.
"This isn't a stick," Conrad pointed out, raising high his own glorified stick. "This is a weapon, and your companion just impaled herself on it, while you were gawking at me."
"At least I'm going to Sovngarde," Beta croaked from the ground.
Conrad stared at her for a moment after hearing that. Was that why all those idiots kept throwing themselves in droves at him? The Nord ones, at least?
"Beta, you're dead," he told her. "Dead people don't talk."
"Ghosts do," Sven said. And despite the fact that he was technically correct, Conrad took a step in his direction, reading a low sweeping strike to his legs. He wondered how long it would take the three of them to figure out that he had not explicitly forbidden them from using magic.
Unbeknownst to them, the ANBU hiding in the nearby trees shook their heads. This was sad to watch.
"So, any interesting stories about some enemies of yours?" Shikaku asked as he dealt the cards. Inoichi knew that the Nara would've rather played something like shogi, but there were four of them. So Koi-Koi it was. The first couple of games had been surprisingly easy because Minato's brother kept forgetting the cards' values.
"Well一" Conrad started, looking at the cards in his hand. Inoichi interrupted him immediately.
"Not the dragons!" He had heard it before, multiple times, especially after the Nord had drank a bit too much.
"Fine, not the dragons," Conrad conceded, looking pensive. "Let's see… There's vampires, necromancers, ancient half-forgotten evils… way too many of those, though. There's the Dark Brotherhood too, I suppose."
"Ooh, their name is interesting already," Chouza brightened up as he refilled everyone's glasses, smelling a good story already. "Who are they?"
"An ancient group, cultists of Sithis and servants of the Night Mother," Conrad said gravely, ending in what was probably meant to be a dramatic pause.
"Conrad, we don't know who those two are," Inoichi reminded him, playing a couple of his cards.
"... right. Well, Sithis is… change, chaos. He's… a bit difficult to define, given how he's either part of the Void or the Void itself. That's a plane beyond Oblivion, by the way."
"Is he a Daedric Prince, too?" Inoichi asked. There seemed to be way too many of those.
"No, he's not. He's not an Aedra either. From what I've read, the Brotherhood believed him to be the husband of Night Mother. Who is either an aspect of Mephala, a Daedric Prince, or something else. Depending on who you ask."
"Something else," Inoichi repeated.
"There are many things out there worse than a Daedric Prince, Inoichi." The Yamanaka didn't find that comforting.
"So, they were cultists?" Shikaku asked. Inoichi had briefly explained the concept of Daedric cults to his friend, mostly as part of a briefing he had been part of. While skeptical, Shikaku had agreed on one thing: they needed to know more about this threat.
"Yes, they believed that the souls of those they killed were sent to Sithis, or at least to his domain. That's one of the reasons they were feared. There's a ritual, see… a ritual known all over Tamriel, which would let you summon them."
"What for?" Inoichi wondered. "To join them?"
"Oh, no. See, by summoning them you could hire them to kill someone… in… exchange for gold…" Conrad kept explaining, each word drawing out slower than the meaning of those words sank in.
There was a bit of an awkward silence at that, to say the least.
"You're talking about assassinations," Shikaku said, putting down his drink. Conrad obviously didn't know the details, but Inoichi could expect that by now he at least had the idea that each of them could've been assigned on such missions before.
Which they had, obviously.
"I suppose so, yes," Conrad nodded, not even apologising for having accidentally compared them to a bunch of crazy cultists.
"I, ah, have the feeling that those are frowned upon where you are from?"
"... depends on who you ask," Conrad said drily. Inoichi nodded, knowing well how the Nord felt about some aspects of the shinobi life. "But for most people, yes, they are. A violent death is way too common in Tamriel, but the Dark Brotherhood made people afraid."
"Because they were a cult of assassins?" Shikaku asked. Which, to be honest, was kinda freaky. Inoichi had heard the story of a ninja belonging to a cult, once. It would be enough to freak out most people.
"Because they would kill anyone they were paid for, as long as the pay was good enough. Nosy neighbours, unfaithful lovers, business rivals… even an emperor."
Inoichi exchanged a glance with the others. Missions against nobility were highly regulated, and the daimyos were untouchable. Even the foreign ones. Suna had opted for invading Konoha rather than moving against their own daimyo, despite the damage to their economy. "They killed the leader of the Empire?" he found himself asking.
"Yeah," Conrad told him grimly, before taking a long drink from his glass. "If you ever decide to visit Tamriel, I'd recommend you don't advertise your profession openly."
The Yamanaka noticed how his two old teammates had become somber all of sudden. Not for what Conrad had just said, shinobi working on delicate assignments knew better than to tell people what they were about to do. Or being spotted.
They were probably imagining what it would be like, being sent to murder people regardless of their status, in service of a malicious power from a different plane of existence. Flashes of what he had seen when mind-walking the dremora came to mind, and he couldn't help but feel a shiver down his spine.
"You know," he forced himself to say, to break the silence. To not think about that. "You're lucky that there's no shinobi in Tamriel."
"What?" Conrad asked, clearly dumbfounded by the sudden change of topic.
"Imagine if you had to face some ninja, instead of some crazy assassins."
"If I had to face shinobi back then, I'd be dead," Conrad grumbled, as his surprise faded.
"Oh, so you admit that shinobi are stronger?" the Yamanaka asked with a smirk.
"What the一I didn't say that! I was nineteen when they tried to kill me the first time! I knew one shout! One!"
"I don't know, most shinobi are pretty strong by the time they're nineteen…" Inoichi wondered out loud teasingly, stroking his chin. "Your brother, for example…"
"Why, you一"
"So, how did you defeat this… Dark Brotherhood, Harissen-san?" Chouza asked, serving everyone some more sake.
"Oh, that's simple, I found their secret lair, and I killed them all."
"Wait, that's it?"
"It's what happened."
"Come on, Conrad, you're a better storyteller than that. The last time I asked you about your homeland's history you quoted a saga to me. You can surely tell us something more about a fight of yours."
"Alright, fine… there was one of them, I remember him because he was dressed like a… do you guys even know what a jester is?"
"Come on, Uncle! It's about to start!" Naruto yelled, pulling Conrad into the large crowd.
He hated crowds. There was always someone that tried to steal his coin purse in them. And this was one of the largest he'd ever seen… It looked like the whole city had gathered around the tower.
"Hey, Naruto! Over here!" someone called, and Conrad noticed the boy's teammates nearby, waving at him. Well, one of them was. Sasuke just nodded in acknowledgment.
He found himself having to push through the people to keep up with the way Naruto was pulling his arm, but they didn't seem to mind. They were all staring at the top of the tower, waiting for something. Given how eager and happy everyone seemed to be, he had expected some kind of big celebration or some kind of festival... but he couldn't see any food stalls or banners anywhere. He couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed.
"Hey guys!" Naruto greeted them, finally letting go of Conrad's poor arm. He tuned out their chatting, trying to figure out what this was all about.
He focused on the excited buzz of conversation around them. Wishful hopes for the future, that the city would thrive under their leader… overall, about par for the course of every city he had ever visited.
"Look, it's about to start!" someone shouted, pointing up. Hushed whispers passed through the crowd, and the people started quieting down.
Conrad looked up, and froze. On the top of the damn tower was Sarutobi, giving a speech. Something about fire having a will. Conrad wasn't really listening… because right on Sarutobi's side was Tsunade Senju.
Then she started a short speech of her own, which Conrad wasn't really interested in either. Mostly because he was realising that the woman that belittled his research methods, skills, and ability to hold his liquor was now the person he had to deal with regarding the boy. And if he could bring him back to Tamriel with him.
How he had not seen this coming, he had no idea.
Conrad entered Sarutobi's office一Tsunade's office now, he guessed一 wearing his best tunic, axe strapped to his belt and carrying his staff. He had decided against wearing armor, for it may have been considered a poor diplomatic choice.
His eyes immediately fell on the newly instated Hokage, who was sitting at her desk while having the gall to look smug at him.
"That hat looks stupid," Conrad told her, ignoring Sarutobi and Jiraiya.
"It kinda does, doesn't it?" she wondered out loud, taking the hat off to give it a look. Sarutobi didn't look amused by that, not at all. But after all, he had worn the hat for a few decades, he was obviously fine with the way it looked. "But what can I say, my grandfather picked it. No doubt you're wondering why I summoned you, though. Obviously not to talk about my new hat."
"If I can hazard a guess, it has to do with something I said to your predecessor," he nodded in said predecessor's direction.
"And you'd be right… we talked a lot about it," Tsunade informed him, gesturing to Jiraiya and Sarutobi. "Akatsuki has shown that they can get to Naruto in the heart of the village. Which should be the safest place for him. They let us know that it is not. So... we would like you to take Naruto with you to Skyrim."
Conrad must have stared at her incredulously, but in all fairness, he had every right to. Because that felt a bit too easy.
"It's not something we've decided lightly," Sarutobi informed him. "We discussed it at length."
"Still, may I ask what made you decide to agree to my request?" Conrad questioned, against every instinct screaming at him to keep his mouth shut and just take the good offer. Because there had to be a catch.
"To put it bluntly, nobody in the Elemental Nations knows about your homeland. Akatsuki may be a dangerous threat, but even they'll have trouble finding you two in an unknown continent." Jiraiya answered. "That, and, a few other factors that we'll have to talk about with you."
Aaah. So they wanted something out of this. That made sense. Conrad felt somehow relieved from having been right about how things were looking too easy all of sudden.
"Before we get to those, though, lightweight... there are some conditions," Tsunade spoke again.
"Obviously," Conrad acknowledged, his eye twitching at the name.
"First of all, a selected group of shinobi will come with you two. Both to ensure Naruto's safety and to allow him to keep training," she told him.
"That makes sense," he nodded, knowing that these shinobi would also have the task of keeping an eye on him, so he didn't disappear with the boy in some remote corner of Tamriel. Which he would have done without hesitating if he could.
"That won't be their only mission, though," Sarutobi added. Tsunade seemed to take it as her cue.
"We believe that there is a lot we can learn from Tamriel, Harissen-san. The ninja that will accompany you will have to gather as much intel as possible, and we'd like you to assist them."
"Depends on what they want to learn," Conrad not quite nodded.
"For starters, we're very interested in the enchanted items of your people," Jiraiya informed him. Conrad tried to keep a neutral expression, but he was sure that the shinobi had noticed his slight wince. Of course they wanted to know about enchanting too. "Like the ring that belonged to your mother, which Naruto used to save Umino Iruka's life."
"An admirable deed," Sarutobi praised.
"Interesting jewelry, I examined it briefly while you were unconscious," Jiraiya continued. "It has no seals, but its properties are undeniable."
"We were wondering why you didn't offer knowledge about the creation of such items to Konoha, since you so easily offered to teach us about alchemy." Tsunade gave him an expectant look.
"It would be very difficult for me to teach you something I'm not well versed in," Conrad explained in the most wizardly fashion he could muster. Mostly because he didn't want to admit just how bad he was at enchanting, his squeamish bias against it notwithstanding. "But I feel like I need to warn you about what this practice requires."
At that the three shinobi paused, glancing at each other. "And what would that be?" Jiraiya asked, speaking for all of them.
"To infuse an item with magical properties, it's necessary to use a soul," he said gravely. Which went well with the wizardly attitude. It seemed to have the desired effect, for Jiraiya visibly winced, Tsunade's eyes slightly widened and… Sarutobi kept a stony face.
Two out of three. He counted it as a victory.
"A soul. A human… I mean, a person's soul?" Tsunade asked, correcting herself as she remembered that humans weren't the only race in the world. Thankfully Conrad had Ta'Sava as proof, because the people of Konoha seemed really confused by that concept at times.
"Such practice is considered abhorrent by most mages, and illegal under the Imperial Law," Conrad explained, privately ignoring the fact that he was breaking many laws regarding magic lately. But it wasn't the same thing. "Animal or monster souls, who have what we know as white souls, are acceptable. That won't stop some, though, who dabble in dark arts, from using people for their more potent black souls for such practice."
"A forbidden jutsu," Sarutobi muttered, and Conrad didn't feel like correcting him about the fact that it wasn't, in fact, a jutsu.
"It is not as widespread as alchemy, but I hope you can see the terrible ways it could be abused." Conrad's hold on his staff tightened, memories of hundreds of atrocities he'd faced over the years flashing through his head.
"Is there any other way to enchant items?" Jiraiya asked, sounding almost hopeful.
"Yes, I know of two ways," Conrad nodded, pausing for dramatic effect. "The first is binding a daedra to an item, which is a complex and dangerous process. The other is using a Sigil Stone, a very rare and dangerous artifact."
"Dangerous how?" Tsunade asked.
"They're tied to the planes of Oblivion, and they can be used to open a portal between it and Mundus. And unless you're lucky enough to find one that had been left in Tamriel in the past, the only way to gain one is to struck a deal with a Daedric Prince," Conrad explained, and given the woman's lack of confusion he supposed that Sarutobi and Jiraiya had told their new leader what he had told them about the Princes and their planes of origin, which saved him time. He didn't feel like giving a lecture now.
"Right. Let's not do that," Tsunade decided. Everyone nodded in agreement.
"If you really wish to learn about enchanting, I could introduce your shinobi to masters of the craft, where they could purchase enchanted items. I can't guarantee that your people will be able to learn it, or to replicate it here."
That was a bit of a lie. The fact that Minato was rotting in the Soul Cairn meant that it was possible for shinobi to mess with souls. If he could try to adapt his brother's seals to magic, what could stop shinobi from figuring out enchanting by themselves if they really wanted to?
Still, if enchanting would give them one more reason to send the boy with him to Tamriel, he'd use the Winterhold College as bait. He had given them a warning without going into the details, he didn't think that talking about the Soul Cairn would be constructive at this point.
At that, a silent exchange passed through the three ninja once again. "That would be acceptable. Of course, we'd be willing to trade a fair price for either or both."
"Your money won't be good in Tamriel, but I know some people that would gladly pay to get their hands on some scrolls written in your language," Conrad observed. And of course, there were also all the marvels of the Elemental Nations. From books about the local geography and traditions to ball point pens and typewriters. He'd probably have to make a list.
"Speaking of money…" Sarutobi said, in a way that clearly meant that it was time to move on with the negotiation. If they could even call it that.
"Right," Tsunade nodded. "The shinobi that will accompany you and Naruto will not be available to Konoha for months… or even years."
"You can keep them, if you want," he suggested. She immediately raised an eyebrow.
"I think we both know that's not possible, and why."
Conrad hated that she was right. "You force me to take some ninja with me, but you worry about not being able to use them for your contracts?"
"Missions," Sarutobi corrected. "It would be a hit on our manpower, yes. And as a consequence, to our finances."
"I see," Conrad said, as he gathered his thoughts. Part of him just wanted to tell them that he could just send their shinobi back whenever they needed them.
But the damn spell wasn't ready yet, and they wouldn't really accept a means of transportation that was controlled only by him. And even if Conrad figured out some way to allow them to activate it without him being present… they could use it to get Naruto whenever they felt like it. No need to involve him in that decision at all.
No, he needed to give them what they wanted. They just didn't want to ask for it, so that it would feel like it was his idea.
He stepped closer to the desk and prepped his staff against it so that it wouldn't fall, which would've been embarrassing. He took his axe from his belt, and much to his annoyance, the shinobi didn't even react in the slightest. Showoffs.
Then, he slowly unscrewed the steel knob by the end of its aft. Not breaking eye contact with Tsunade, Conrad poured the contents of the secret compartment on the desk.
"Would these suffice as an account for hiring your shinobi for some missions in Tamriel, then?" he asked once the last of the handful of gems had fallen on the desk. After all, these people were mercenaries, no matter how much Inoichi got offended when he described them as such.
And, at the risk of sounding like a hypocrite, there were some Altmer that deserved a kunai through their skulls.
"I may not have become Godaime, but I'll become Rokudaime for sure! You'll see!" Naruto boasted loudly. Sasuke and Sakura had gotten used to it.
The three of them had been left to their own devices after the ceremony was over. Which soon ended with them gravitating towards Ichiraku. They had gotten used to that very quickly, as well.
In fact, even the owners had gotten used to it. Ayame had even learned their favorite orders.
"I better get going," Sakura told the others, having finished her bowl. "I promised my Mom I'd help her."
"We'll see you at Sasuke's place later, right?" Naruto asked immediately. "For the sleepover?"
"It's not a sleepover," Sasuke protested. "It's a team-building exercise."
"I'm pretty sure that hanging out, eating snacks, playing games, and sleeping in the same room counts more as a sleepover," the boy said smugly, earning a glare from Sasuke.
"Ah, no, not today. Sorry," Sakura apologized.
"What? Why?" Naruto asked, confused. Even Sasuke seemed a bit surprised.
"It's just… look, it's stupid. But my parents are a bit... protective, and… " she stopped, finding it a bit difficult to admit the last part.
"... is this because of me?" Naruto asked, obviously worried. "Because of...?"
"No, no!" Sakura quickly answered. Her parents may have been surprised when they'd had the first, almost accidental sleepover, but had not tried to persuade her from not being supportive of her teammate. Both of them. "It's just… ugh, this is so embarrassing... they didn't feel comfortable with the idea of me being alone with two boys… and no adult supervision."
Naruto's worry morphed in confusion, and he titled the head like he did when he didn't quite understand what Iruka-sensei was saying back at the Academy. "Why?"
Sakura was a smart girl, everyone had always said so. So she quickly came to the decision that she would not be the one to explain the bees and the birds to her teammate. Especially since said teammate had a crush on her.
Besides, Naruto had an uncle now. If anyone had to explain the facts of life to him, it was him.
So, she quickly paid and decided to say farewell to the two boys. "I'll see you two tomorrow. Just because Kakashi-sensei is out on a mission doesn't mean we get to skip training."
The two genin watched her going with a mutual look of bewilderment.
"What was that about?" Naruto asked, after a while.
"No idea," Sasuke answered honestly. "Girls are weird."
After Minato's brother had shown off his hidden wealth, Tsunade had made a brief note to reprimand whoever had inspected the equipment of the foreigners when they had been captured months ago.
Secret compartments inside of a prisoner's weapon shouldn't escape the attentions of a hidden village.
Then, there had been a lot of contracts to sign, which the man decided to do with his full signature. Possibly out of spite, to dwarf Tsunade's. When asked about it, he had just grumbled that he had gained 'way too many titles' during his life but didn't elaborate further.
Too bad she couldn't read his language, she would've liked to try to call out on some of them.
Finally, she was left alone with her old teammate and sensei.
"That went well," Jiraiya offered.
"We gained a place where to hide Naruto until he'll be strong enough, secured possible trade routes for the village and maybe even the Land of Fire a few years down the line, and gained a new market for missions that no other village knows about," Sarutobi nodded, putting some tobacco in his pipe. "That would sound like a successful meeting, yes."
"Except that we're gambling over the fact that Naruto will want to come back," Jiraiya observed. They remained silent for a moment.
"We'll cross that bridge when we get there," Tsunade offered. She was sure the kid would pick the right decision, in the end. She opened a drawer of her desk, retrieved some money from it and offered it to Sarutobi. "Here, you won. The first thing he did entering the office was throwing an insult."
"Don't take it too hard," her sensei told her, counting the money. "I asked Yamanaka Inoichi about that habit of his. According to him, that's either a defense mechanism or possibly a Nord tradition."
Conrad woke up by the sound of someone knocking at the door. His eyes drifted to the clock, and he decided that it was way too early. Especially considering that he had fallen asleep at his desk, making plans, consulting maps and writing lists.
Mostly lists of stuff he would need to buy and bring back to Skyrim with him, possibly in bulk. There was also the matter of teaching the boy Cyrodillic, at least. And maybe Nordic, later. Along with as many lessons about Tamriel he could cram in that little head.
Sadly Naruto had gone to spend the night with his little friends. He had not even had the time to talk to him about their trip. He could always do it when the boy came back home for lunch, he reasoned.
The knocking continued, so Conrad decided to go check what they wanted so badly, whoever 'they' were.
"This better be quick," he said as he opened the door. "The Green Menace will be here soon, and一"
"Good morning, Harissen-san," one of Naruto's little friends greeted him. The one with pink hair, named after strawberries. Or cherries. One of the two. "Is Naruto here? We were supposed to meet earlier in the morning, and he didn't show up."
"I thought he was at your friend's house?" Conrad asked, as he registered what the girl had said. "The broody one, Sasuke?"
At that, Sakura一right, that was her name一bit her lip, eyes full of worry. "Sasuke didn't come to the meeting, either."