12.1 – Name Game (by Masterweaver)
"...The Natural Sue Key."
"Yep."
"The Natural. Sue Key."
"It's legitimate."
"Sue Key. Natural."
"Monika, the more you repeat that, the more I'm ready to demonstrate my skills."
Monika pinched her brow. "The tree is getting desperate with these puns, isn't it. A prosecution lawyer, the Natural Sue Key."
"With a side job of editing fanfics." Natsuki shrugged. "I mean, good to have skills, but yeah, what the fuck."
"At least it's not another Slayori loop," Yuri pointed out.
12.2 – The Gift That Keeps On Giving (by Awesomedude17)
"So, we're back from our adventures with the Reds and Blues." Monika said.
"Yep." Natsuki replied.
"In which we were AI."
"Yep." Sayori closed her eyes.
"And then we got robot bodies."
"Yes we did." Yuri added.
"So... I'd have to say... it's really strange to know that when we got out in those, we can be... male, female... or somewhere in between."
"Tell me about it. That Sarge guy's a weirdo." Natsuki crossed her arms.
"Hey Natsuki." Sayori spoke up.
"Yeah?"
"Isn't there a term for the in between gender thing?"
Natsuki blushed. "Figure it out yourself. I'm sure Yuri did when she experimented."
Now it was Yuri's turn to blush. "H-hey!"
"Oh don't give me that response."
"Girls!"
Everyone piped up at Monika's outburst.
"Look, I get it. Sometimes the Loops makes us curious. No, we won't talk about it if we get uncomfortable about it. Okay?"
"...Yes." The three literature club members said.
"Good." Monika said.
She didn't want to admit that she enjoyed the fact that they had options, and neither did the others.
12.3 – Playing Each Other (by Black Omachao)
(DDLC)/(Seaman)
"And I emerge again to the endless dreariness of this tank…" Seaman muttered to himself as his newly formed fish body ripped free from the nautilus, alongside his UnAwake-other selves.
"Seaman, seaman, seaman!"
"Arglo!"
"Coloray!"
"Baby!"
The Awake Seaman let out an annoyed groan at the mindless babble coming from his other selves, it would take a bit of time talking to the caretaker until they were ready to form complete sentences… "And I'm pocket-locked," the Looper realized, a look of frustration crossing his human face. "Well… how exactly am I supposed to waste my time this Loop until I either escape, or am killed by neglect…?"
Choosing to ignore the other baby gillmen swimming about the tank, Seaman took a look at his surroundings to see if there was anything different about the tank this time around. Eventually his roaming eyes stopped when he spotted… a small laptop computer in the corner of the tank.
"… What in the?" the fish-man swam over to the device, inspecting it with his antenna, his eyes narrowing. "This is definitely not supposed to be here. Is this even real, or a toy? Would it even work anymore if it was real…?" Out of curiosity the man-faced fish pressed the power button with his antenna, the computer lit up. "It does work? Interesting… well I don't have much else going on, let's see what's on here."
.
"You ever been one of those tamagatchi things?" Monika questioned as she looked towards Natsuki.
The three club members present were Monika, Natsuki and Yuri. They were waiting for Sayori to show up, who they knew was also Awake, and talking to pass the time.
"Like, once. Wasn't that pleasant, my owner was lazy," the pink-haired girl grunted. "What about you? Or Yuri?"
"Hey, guys!" the voice of Sayori caught the attention of her friends, before they spotted her come into the club room, with some kind of white, square-shaped device in her hands. Hiroaka following her, loosely holding onto a television set. "I found this…"
"… Is that a game console?" Natsuki spoke up with a confused expression that Monika and Yuri shared. "A Sega Dreamcast, to be exact…?"
"Yeah… I think," Sayori shrugged. "I found it in Hiroaka's room, and it looks like it works. Did you program video games within the game, Monika?"
"Not this Loop," the Anchor commented with a confused look. "Wait… why were you in Hiroaka's room?"
"He wouldn't come out of his house, I was worried!" the vice-president explained with a slightly embarrassed expression.
"He… wouldn't come out?" Monika looked towards the faceless player-character for a moment, before shaking her head and focusing her attention back on the game console. "So, what's with this thing?"
"Well… it seems to work, we don't have any plans this Loop… I figure why not try playing it? Since it's here," Sayori suggested with a small smile.
"Playing a video game… while we live inside of a video game?" Yuri gave the other Looper a contemplative look.
Natsuki's face scrunched slightly with an annoyed expression towards Yuri. "Why is that idea weird to you? It's not really that weird."
"Maybe it's supposed to be one of those in-game mini-games? Game sometimes have mini-games accessible through game consoles within the game," Monika commented helpfully, but frowned a moment later. "I just said 'game' a lot of times."
"Yeah, you did," Yuri nodded, suppressing the urge to laugh. "But that does look interesting, Sayori. And you've also got a TV there, so I don't see why we couldn't try. I'm a little curious what kind of games would be on it."
"I could just check the code, if there are mini-games, I should be able to find them easily," Monika pointed out.
"That's not as fun, let's just start the console up and see for ourselves… if it works," Natsuki insisted, adding a skeptical tone to the end of her sentence.
Sayori nodded with a big smile, turning to Hiroaka and giving a thumbs-up. "Okay! Hiroaka, hook up the TV-set!"
A few moments past with no response coming from the MC, he just stood there with the TV in his hands.
"… Hiroaka?" Sayori coughed a bit as her friends stared at her. "… You're embarrassing me Hiroaka." She looked towards the other girls with a nervous laugh, "He was doing so well earlier, when I asked him to carry the TV…"
"… Right," Natsuki nodded slowly.
"Sayori… I don't think he's going to do anything," Monika spoke up with a sympathetic tone.
The vice-president sighed before putting the game console down, walking over to Hiroaka and leading him through the process of placing the television down, and plugging it in. "There, thank you Hiroaka," she said before sitting him down a few feet from the TV. Sayori turned back to her Looping friends and smiled again. "Okay, now I'll just plug in the console, and we can see what this can do!"
.
"There aren't very many programs on this thing…" Seaman spoke in a bored tone as he looked over the options on the small, underwater computer. "Not even any internet, hmph…" Using his antenna to maneuver the mouse, he clicked on the games folder, which only contained one game. "… Why even have a folder for this?"
"Agura!" one of the infantile gillman babbled as it swam by him.
"… Well, not like I usually have many options for things to do. Let's see here… Doki Doki… Literature Club?" the Anchor paused for a moment. "Haven't I heard that somewhere before…? I can't place my fin on it…" shaking his head free of these thoughts, he clicked on the icon. "Whatever, it's something to do either way…"
.
"What do you mean this thing only has one game!?" Natsuki spoke with a tone of frustration as the four girls stared at the screen showing their single option for games to play: 'Seaman.'
"Seems to be pre-loaded, despite appearances this Dreamcast replica doesn't actually take disks," Monika explained, to prove her point Monika tapped the button that would normally open the top of the console, with no results.
"I've never heard of 'Seaman…' sounds odd," Yuri narrowed her eyes at the icon used for the game: a silhouette of what appeared to be a frog with a human head.
"Well, one game or not, I'm still curious. I say we start it," Sayori insisted with a look of enthusiasm.
The other club members couldn't really think of any reason not to, so the icon was clicked on and the game began to run…
"Hello, and welcome to the laboratory of Jean Paul Gassé."
12.4 – NSFW (by Masterweaver)
Monika Awoke, received three pings, looked over her loop memories... and groaned. "Not one word, Yuri."
Yuri put a coquettish finger to her chin and smirked with a quirked eyebrow and a thoughtful hum.
"...okay, I know in a literal sense you didn't say a single word, but that is still blatant defiance of the POINT of what I said."
"Erm," said Natsuki. "I... is there anywhere private where I can check-"
"The files are all there, Nats."
"Did you look?!"
"No!" Monika insisted. "I just saw, um, the file names. You... reeeeeally don't want me to tell you what the file names are."
Yuri put her hands on her hips and leaned forward, tilting her head curiously.
"Really don't want me to tell you. Also, are you going to keep up the mute act the whole loop?"
Yuri sat down, crossing her legs and thoughtfully tapping a foot in the air.
Monika rolled her eyes. "Whatever. So, um... do we... talk about what our unawake selves did, or pretend it never happened?"
Whatever Natsuki was going to say was halted when Sayori burst through the door. "Okay, we are not dealing with Hiroaka this loop, okay?!"
Natsuki rose a hand. "Um-"
"He is wearing. A gimp suit."
There was a pause.
Then Monika dragged her palms down her face. "I hate H-Game variants sometimes."
Yuri giggled.
"You shut up. I'm changing the code."
12.5 – Into The Dream (by Black Omochao)
(DDLC)/(Yume Nikki)
"Hmm… another flesh Loop…?" Monika pondered as she looked over her body, noting the beating heart she could feel pumping blood through her vains, the way her lungs took in oxygen, the way she felt the need to blink her eyes every now and then. With a 'hmm' Monika let out a Ping and got three responses. "Guess I'll go to the club and meet the others." The Anchor shrugged before heading towards her door.
"Huh…?" An odd feeling struck Monika when she gripped the doorknob, a feeling that she could place, but one that held a distinct feeling of wrongness to it… "Odd…" the green-eyed girl shook her head, resolving to think about it later. She opened the door… and wasn't sure what to think about the results…
"Monika?"
The voice of Sayori called out to the literature club's president. Monika glanced over to another part of the empty nexus her door seemed to lead to, seeing Sayori coming from another door, likely leading to her room. "Sayori?"
"Yeah… What is this place?" the shorter-haired girl questioned as she stepped over to her Anchor, looking around at the area their bedroom doors had somehow led them to: a nearly empty void of strange, mixing colors. The only objects in sight being the two doors the girls had come from, and another larger door that lacked any coloration. "I thought we were in a human Loop when I Woke up, that's what my body, and my memories told me… But this doesn't seem right…"
"I thought the same, Sayori. And, I don't think we were wrong…" Monika muttered with a contemplative expression.
Sayori gave her friend a curious look. "What do you mean by that? This doesn't really look like reality… more like a dream."
"A dream…" Monika spoke slowly as she thought about this. "Maybe this is a dream… in some Loops I know people can have connected dreams." The Anchor nodded despite her fellow Looper's confused look. "The last memory of my UnAwake-self this Loop is of falling asleep."
Sayori's eyes widened in realization. "Hey, mine is too!"
"So, what could be going on is we're having a linked-dream. Which is why this place is like this, and why things feel so… off," Monika spoke the last word with a bit of an unsure tone to her voice, but she seemed confident in the rest of her assessment.
"Okay, I can buy that… Waking up in a dream? Huh…" the pink-haired girl chuckled a bit at the strange nature of that statement. "So… what should we do? Wait to wake up… like, wake up for real, in bed, not Wake up like…" Sayori paused at the look Monika was giving her, she coughed a bit and smiled sheepishly. "You get it…"
"Well… we don't even know if my theory is right," the programmer scratched her head. "So, I don't think just waiting to wake up is the best idea. We do know Natsuki and Yuri are probably here too, but there's only three doors…" Monika gave a suspicious look towards the colorless door that stood out against the swerving colors of the void.
"You're probably right, but is going through there the best idea?" Sayori questioned, looking around again. "But on the other hand, I don't really see any other options…"
Monika let out a sigh, "There really aren't any. It's this, go back to one of our rooms, or just wait. The latter two probably won't accomplish anything…"
"So; suspicious, colorless door it is," Sayori concluded with a groan.
The two girls nodded to each other, their eyes narrowed, before they stepped towards the door. Monika grabbed the nob, before opening it and revealing: long staircase that descended into darkness.
"… You know, Monika, maybe waiting isn't that bad an idea." Sayori concluded with a blank expression on her face.
"Come on," the club president sighed, taking hold of her friend's hand and beginning a careful descent down the stairs.
.
"You know, I'm beginning to regret this decision," Natsuki muttered.
"How so?" Yuri questioned as she walked alongside the other Looper.
"Yuri, we have no idea what is going on with this Loop. Monika and Sayori are probably Awake, somewhere, but I doubt we'll find them here!" the pink-haired girl exclaimed, gesturing to the black void surrounding the two. "… If you could even call this a 'here.'"
"Well, endless black space or not, we don't really know how to get back to where we came in from. So, I think the best course of action would be to keep going. I'm sure we'll find our friends, or at least something of interest, eventually," Yuri assured with a small smile.
Natsuki let out an annoyed grunt. "Yuri. There's nothing here!"
"Just because we can't see anything doesn't mean there isn't anything," the darker-haired girl countered. Before the conversation could be continued, Yuri spotted something that grabbed her interest. "Huh? Now this is something…" the taller girl kneeled down to examine the blade that lay on the ground.
"What are you doing?" Natsuki crossed her arms, before noticing what her friend was picking up. "… Yuri, I know you have your interests. But picking up random knives off the floor of surreal dark worlds is not a habit that should be enforced."
"It's strange that this would just be here in the middle of this pitch-black area, so oddly out of place…" Yuri muttered as she took the blade from its cover to examine it. "Good quality, in both material and craftsmanship. Looks like it could cut very effectively…"
"Seriously, put that down. I have a bad feeling about this…" Natsuki hissed, her eyes darting from left to right.
"You worry too much, what could be so bad about me just picking this up?" Yuri questioned with a shrug.
"Hey!" a voice called out, Yuri and Natsuki looked over and spotted another girl, perhaps a bit younger than them, stomping over. The darkness of the surroundings seemed to swirl around her body, her pig-tailed hair swerved upwards. The Looping duo could almost swear she was emitting an aura of pure rage. "That's MINE!"
"… That, that could happen," Natsuki muttered with a blank expression her friend now shared.
Madotsuki let out an enraged screech before hurling herself towards the two Loopers.
12.6 – Hard Favor
No one could say, for sure, why that specific jab set her off. Really, Natsuki had said worse things to Monika, and neither her nor Sayori, or even Monika herself, had ever really given Natsuki a lot of guff for it. The next day, Yuri would admit that she didn't even remember exactly what the insult had been, it was so innocuous and off-the-cuff. Natsuki giving Monika shit, usually in a playful manner these days, was just one of the regular dynamics the Loopers of the Literature Club had settled into. Monika rarely ever gave any sign of taking offense to her barbs. It was as if she expected such treatment and accepted it as natural. Following her example, Sayori and Yuri had never said anything about it. Until today.
Maybe Yuri was just having a bad day? Really, even after all these years, her friends still only somewhat understood what all went on in Yuri's head. And she certainly wasn't known for making sudden, violent outbursts. So it should come as no surprise that her friends were all stunned when Yuri suddenly jumped out of her seat, strode over to the table Natsuki and Monika were sitting at, and slammed a fist onto the table. "What the hell is your problem, Natsuki?"
Natsuki just gave her a blank, confused stare. As did Monika, and Sayori, who had been trying out different kinds of handmade hats on Hiroaka's head. "We all have a lot of problems, Yu," Natsuki replied after a long pause, "Could you be more spec–the fuck?!" she gasped as she was suddenly hauled up out of her seat by the shoulders.
"I'm not joking here," Yuri hissed in her face, "I'm sick of listening to you bullying Monika like this, and I want you to stop. I insist that you stop. If I ever hear you say such a pointlessly cruel thing to her–"
"Yuri, stop," Monika said calmly.
"No!" shouted Yuri, turning to Monika, "I can't stand this any–"
"You can and you will!" said Monika, much less calmly. "You are going to put Natsuki down. That was not a request. Natsuki, you and Sayori are going to take Hiroaka and leave the clubroom. I don't care where you go or what you do, but you're not coming back to this room until I call for you. There will be no contrariness. Have I made myself clear?"
For a moment, there was only silence. Monika had never spoken to them like this before. She was known to bark orders in a firm tone, but only when circumstances made it absolutely necessary. Typically, she didn't give orders or commands as much as she gave well-informed suggestions that her club members very rarely saw any reason to argue against.
Sayori opened her mouth. Monika snapped her head in her direction and preemptively silenced her with a glare. Seeing that, Yuri's eyes widened and she dropped Natsuki. Natsuki hurried out of the room. After a moment's hesitation, Sayori Pocketed her hats, grabbed Hiroaka by the hand, and hauled out of there.
Monika and Yuri were alone in the clubroom. Suddenly very apprehensive, Yuri moved to sit in the chair Natsuki had been using. "No," said Monika flatly. Yuri jumped back away from the chair, as if it were made of hot metal. "Make tea," Monika commanded, "Please."
Yuri seemingly couldn't move fast enough to comply. As soon as she actually started with the well-worn tea-making process, the ritual familiarity soothed her, and by the time she brought the tea over to the table she had recovered her nerves. She poured Monika a cup and dropped a sugar cube in, then poured herself a cup. She moved towards the chair, but then stopped. "You may sit, now," said Monika, her voice much softer now. Yuri did so.
"Alright, so…I'm not happy about what just happened," said Monika evenly, "But I'm sorry that I lost my temper. Now, I never thought it needed to be said, but I won't tolerate any hostility between the members of this club on my behalf. If you and Natsuki have an argument, that's fine. Friends do that. But I don't ever want to see you act that way towards Natsuki or, however unlikely, Sayori because of something they said or did to me. Is that understood, Yuri?"
"But–"
"Is that understood, Yuri?" Monika repeated, somewhat harshly.
"Y-yes, Monika," said Yuri.
Monika sipped her tea, as did Yuri. They were silent for a moment, and then Monika sighed. "I suppose it's only fair that I offer an explanation?"
"I…yes, please. I would very much like to understand why you…why…" Yuri fumbled into silence.
"Why I'm willing to not only take abuse, but defend my abuser?" said Monika. Yuri nodded. "Well, alright then…I'm going to have to tell you a little story. Now, this happened a very, very long time ago…not long after Natsuki began Looping, actually."
…
A couple million years ago, from Monika's perspective:
It was Wednesday night. Sayori, Yuri, both Unawake, Natsuki, and Hiroaka had all gone home after school, as per usual. Monika was sitting alone in the clubroom, reading a couple different programming manuals. As well as a book on advanced computer science. "Someday," Monika murmured to herself, "I'll be able to program my own house."
Then there was a knock at the door. Monika looked up and stared at the door. 'Huh.'
"Come in, Natsuki," said Monika.
"How'd you know it was me?" asked Natsuki as she slipped into the room, closing the door behind her.
"No Pings today, so Sayori and Yuri are both still Unawake. You're the only one who would come here outside of normal school hours. This loop, anyways." Monika said. She glanced over to a corner of the room and scrunched her face in concentration. A mini-fridge, microwave, and hot plate glitched into existence, all plugged into a power strip that was plugged into a wall outlet. She also coded in a big, puffy sleeping bag. "There…make yourself at home," said Monika, a little short of breath and wiping sweat off her brow.
"What's with you?" asked Natsuki, raising an eyebrow.
"Electrical appliances are…complex. That's why I stay here after school; until I've built up my strength and know-how, trying to code in a house for myself might actually kill me."
"So?" Natsuki grunted, "We're functionally immortal now, right?"
Monika chuckled, "You haven't been to Eiken yet. And that's right where we would both end up if I died right now. Anchor, remember? If I die the loop crashes. Jenny said the Admins really hate that."
"The hell is Eiken?" Natsuki asked, taking a seat across the table from Monika.
"Yes. Yes it is," Monika muttered, staring a thousand yards deeply into the middle distance.
"What? No, nevermind, I don't care. I have a bone to pick with you," said Natsuki.
"Oh?" Monika asked. She swept her arm over the books in front of her, and they all disappeared into her Pocket. "I'm all ears, Natsuki. You want something to drink?"
"No, and you can drop the nice act," Natsuki snapped, "Sayori and Yuri are both willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, for some dumb reason, but you and I both know what you're reallylike. I'd like to have this conversation in Serious Mode, if you don't mind."
Monika sighed. Then she gave Natsuki a small smile and folded her hands under her chin. "Fine. Serious Mode engaged. What's on your mind?"
"I wanna know what's wrong with Yuri and Sayori!" Natsuki demanded, "They've been acting really frikkin' weird these last three days!"
"Huh?" asked Monika, cocking her head. "There's nothing wrong with them, Natsuki. They're 'Unawake' right now, remember? They can't remember–"
"That's not what I'm talking about, damn it!" Natsuki yelled at her. "I know they don't remember anything, that's not my point. They're acting weird. Like…like…" Natsuki floundered, unable to find the right words to explain herself.
Monika sighed, "Like robots?"
"YES! Exactly! They're acting like robots–no, like drones. Mindless drones. I told Sayori a hilarious joke today, and not only did she not laugh her butt off, she didn't react at all. She acted like I wasn't even there!"
"Because your joke wasn't part of the script," said Monika, "So Sayori didn't have any reaction to give."
"What script?" asked Natsuki.
"The game's script," said Monika, "We're characters in a computer game, remember? And not very complicated characters, either. When we're not Awake, we're…we're not real people, Natsuki. Just part of the game. And as parts of the game, we can't acknowledge things that aren't part of the game. That's why Unawake you didn't have any kind of comment to make about Yuri practicing her knife-throwing in the clubroom last loop. This is…what, your eighth loop, right? Have you really not noticed any of this before now?"
"I've had a lot on my mind," Natsuki grumbled in self-defense. "So…we're basically pieces of furniture when we aren't Awake, is that what you're saying?"
"Pretty much, yeah," said Monika. Then she frowned and looked aside, "Well, besides me. Even when I'm Unawake, I'm aware that I'm in a game. I'm the only one who always knows the truth."
Natsuki snorted and rolled her eyes. "Of course. You're so special, after all."
Just then, the clubroom door opened and Sayori strode in, all made up like a clown and singing opera. Hiroaka rode in on a unicycle behind her, juggling bowling pins, while Yuri cartwheeled into the room in a cheerleader's outfit, pom-poms and all. "Give me a D! And another! Give me an O! And another! Give me a K! And another! Give me an I! And another! What's that spell? DOKI-DOKI!" she chanted with a huge, toothy grin that, at least on Yuri's face, looked absolutely alien and freakish to Natsuki.
"What the hell?!" exclaimed Natsuki.
"This is the closest I can get to giving them some façade of sentience," said Monika, somewhat morosely, "I can make them do different things by altering the script; something I've become much better at doing since Looping. But that's it. Like this, they're no better than puppets dancing on my strings."
"WELL STOP IT!" Natsuki screamed at her.
Abruptly, Yuri, Sayori, and Hiroaka all stopped and fell silent. They all marched single file out of the room. "So, yeah," said Monika, sounding bored, "That's…that's a reality I have to deal with."
Natsuki just stared at her in stark-faced horror. Monika snapped her fingers, a hand-mirror appearing in her hand, holding it up so Natsuki could see her own expression and pointing a finger at it. "See this? This, right here? This is how I felt on the inside, realizing that I was the only person in my world that realized what my world actually was. Have you ever read any Lovecraft?"
"Huh?" asked Natsuki, a little dumbfounded.
"H.P. Lovecraft. Dark fantasy, sci-fi horror writer? The Call of Cthulu? At the Mountains of Madness? The Shadow over Innsmouth? Wrote most of the "Hub back-ups" for these nasty Admin-level…entities, I guess, that the Admins and Loopers call "the Mythos Hackers". Jenny told me that we don't want to get mixed up with them. Oh, by the way, while we're on this subject, Jenny mentioned something I forgot to tell you about before now…if you ever so much as hear about some fellow called "Old Man Henderson", stay very, very far out of his way. Apparently he's some kind of non-Looping 'anti-body program' Admins use to counter Mythos shenanigans, and he's also a living WMD. But we were talking about something else, weren't we?"
Natsuki just sat in silence. She blinked. "So…so you really…I…" Natsuki stopped and took a deep breath, "You actually weren't just being a bitch. We…we're literally just puppets to you?"
"No!" said Monika emphatically, "You…okay, yeah, I used to see you guys that way…but that was all Baseline! You're my friends, Natsuki, and I know you might never believe me but I swear to you that I'm not like that anymore. I…Natsuki, I will never forgive myself for what I've done, and I've already decided that I'm going to devote all of my time in the Loops to making things better for my club members…I don't want to be forgiven. Not completely. Not yet…I did horrible, unspeakable things, and all I want is to…make amends, I suppose."
"Okay, okay, quit the waterworks, sheesh," Natsuki implored her. Monika conjured a handkerchief and dried her eyes with it, and then blew her nose.
Natsuki had, in a short span of time, gone from upset, to outright angry, to abject horror, and now she was just confused. She was, after all, a sensitive and empathetic person, no matter how stand-offish she acted at times. As badly as she wanted to hate Monika for what she had done, she couldn't just ignore the club president's plight. She could feel the remorse coming off of her in waves. "Fuck!" Natsuki suddenly exclaimed, seemingly out of nowhere, slamming a fist on the table. Monika flinched. "Damn it, Monika, I don't wanna feel sorry for you!"
"Um–"
"Screw you!" Natsuki suddenly screamed, standing up and flipping the table to the side. Monika paled and jumped back out of her chair, knocking it over and almost falling on her ass. "Fuck off, Monika! You're a horrible, selfish person and you don't deserve any of my sympathy! I have every right to hate your guts! Yuri and Sayori have even more right to hate you! There's no reason any of us should consider you a human being, much less a friend! You have no right to be the leader of our club, or even a member of this club, and you especially don't deserve to be our…our Anchor, or whatever the fuck! So fuck you!" Natsuki was red in the face, tears streaming down her face, huffing and puffing as if out of breath.
Then, quite suddenly, she grabbed her chair and threw it at Monika, who deftly sidestepped out of the way. "Damn it, why?! Why do you…why do you always…why do you have to…why does everything go your way? You're like a bad character in a story! Sayori's already forgiven you for making her kill herself, I'm not sure Yuri ever held anything against you in the first place, and knowing what I know about stupid fanbases I wouldn't be surprised if most of the people who've played this game also think you're a perfect little angel who did nothing wrong because you were lonely! Goddamn it why is the universe so damn stupid?!"
Natsuki turned away from Monika, grabbed another chair, and threw it at a window, smashing it. She flipped another table. She grabbed a third chair and slammed it against another table, screaming at the top of her lungs as the chair exploded into splinters and the table cracked across the middle and bowed in. Monika sighed, and created a sledgehammer in her hands. "Hey, Natsuki! Catch!" she shouted, gently tossing the hammer underhand to her. Natsuki caught it, looking a little surprised. Monika closed her eyes, and all manner of assorted, easily breakable objects appeared throughout the room. She opened her eyes. "Go nuts," she said with a small smile.
About thirty minutes later, after a whole bunch of smashing and cursing and ranting about the unfairness of life, Natsuki finally dropped the hammer and fell down. She tried to land on her hands and knees, but she almost immediately fell down onto her side, breathing raggedly. Her face was fully flushed red. Then, her rage spent, she gave a sudden, piercing cry and curled in on herself. She buried her face in her arms and started sobbing, and she took one more weak swing at the floor with one of her fists. "Damn it…damn it, I hate this. I hate you…I wanna hate you…"
"I know," said Monika, sitting down on the floor next to Natsuki and pulling her up and hugging her. "I know how you feel, Natsuki. I wish I could hate myself, too. It would honestly be easier than what I do feel."
"Shuddup," Natsuki mumbled into her arms, "Not helping."
"Sorry," Monika said, "But it's the truth. I lost my ever-loving mind and did things…awful things. But I can't take it back. I have to accept my mistakes and do my best to move forward. It's okay for you to hate me, Natsuki. Someone should. It's no more than I deserve, after all."
"But I can't," Natsuki moaned, "How can I hate someone who's so messed up inside over what they did? Knowing how you feel, how can I hold it against you without feeling like an asshole? I may act full of myself some…most of the time, but I'm not that self-righteous." Natsuki pulled her head out of her arms and wrapped them around Monika, returning her hug. "…besides, hate is an ugly feeling. I don't like it. I don't really want to hate you…it'd be easier if I didn't have to deal with you at all…but you're here, and we're all stuck with each other, and that's never gonna change, is it?"
"Not likely," Monika admitted. "This is our reality. It is what it is, whether we like it or not."
"That blows," Natsuki grunted. "Reality really, really sucks. It always has."
"But it doesn't always have to. Our reality is what we make of it," said Monika. "Consider a tomato. From the perspective of the tomato plant, assuming that it has a perspective, the tomato is a means of creating more tomato plants. From the perspective of an animal, it's a source of nourishment. From the perspective of a human being it could be a food they love, or a food they hate, or just an ingredient in ketchup. Or catsup, if they're weirdoes."
By now Natsuki had drawn back and was staring blankly at her. Monika cleared her throat, "Alright, not my best analogy, but…my point is, we can dwell on the fact that I'm a humanoid abomination against God and Nature and that you girls are my former victims forced to suffer my presence for the indefinite future. And yes, that whole deal sounds horrible. Or, we can focus on the positive side of things. The fact that Sayori and Yuri are alive, none of us are deleted, and I'm not alone or insane anymore. We have an indefinite future ahead of us, and with it the possibility of resolving our personal issues and exploring the wonders of the Multiverse, according to Jenny. I can repair my friendships with all of you, Sayori can visit universes where therapists and antidepressants exist, Yuri can expand her knife collection beyond the limits of absurdity, and you might actually get to loop into the worlds that your favorite manga are based on. And we can…well, do whatever we want, really. The four of us are the only real people in this whole world so we don't have to worry about school or…or crappy home lives or whatever. We can play games together, write whatever we want to write all day long, have slumber parties in the clubroom and watch stupid movies every night, start a band, whatever! And once I've figured out how to expand the limitations of our game, the possibilities only grow from there. We can do anything and everything. And the four of us can do it all together, as friends."
Natsuki looked thoughtful. "Okay," she said softly, "Alright, yeah, that sounds a lot less sucky. I think I can be cool with that."
Monika and Natsuki just sat there, on the floor, both of them staring thoughtfully at nothing. A moment later, Monika spoke up. "Natsuki, I…I know I haven't earned the right, yet, but if you'd be willing to do something for me that's technically for the good of the whole club–"
"Fuckin' spit it out already," Natsuki sighed.
"I want to ask you for a favor," Monika said, "I can't ask this of the others. Sayori is way too nice, and Yuri too…gentle? You, on the other hand, would probably be able to not only do this, but hell; you might even enjoy this."
"So what is it?" asked Natsuki.
"I want you to…hmm. How do I put it?" Monika asked herself, tapping a finger to her chin. "I can't ask you to hate on me forever. I don't want that. I want you to…antagonize me? No…I mean, yes, sort of, but…dang it, five seconds ago I knew exactly what I wanted you to do but now I'm confused by the limitations of the English language."
"Wait, don't we speak Japanese?" asked Natsuki.
"No, our game was made by Americans. We have a Japanese aesthetic, but our native language is English," Monika explained.
"But all my manga is in Japanese!" Natsuki protested.
Monika opened her mouth, but then her eyes widened and she snapped her fingers. "Got it! Natsuki, I want you to give me shit."
Natsuki blinked. "You what?"
"I want you to give me shit. To give me no end of shit. Not literal excrement, obviously, but just a generally hard time. Pick on me, insult me, harass me…sitcom nemesis shenanigans, basically. I mean, not constantly. Not excessively. Just–"
"You want me to bully you?" Natsuki asked her. She sounded distinctly unhappy with the idea.
Monika stared at her and blinked. Then, rather bluntly, she said "Yes. That's oversimplifying it, but yes. 'Bully' isn't the word I would use, though. Rather, I want you to be my…gadfly."
"Your what?"
"My gadfly," Monika repeated as she stood up, sprited a beanbag chair into existence, and sat down in it. Another one appeared in front of Natsuki, which she climbed into. "The Greek philosopher, Socrates, likened himself to a gadfly. You see, in Greek myth there was once a hero named Bellerophon. He was famous for riding the winged horse Pegasus and slaying Chimera, a fire-breathing monster with the heads of a goat, lion, and snake. In certain versions of the myth, a gadfly bit Pegasus as the Chimera died, causing him to throw Bellerophon who then fell to his death, thus fulfilling the prophecy that no man could survive fighting Chimera. In other versions, Bellerophon did survive the fight and became renowned as a great hero. Later in life, he tried to further prove his greatness by flying Pegasus up to the home of the gods, Mount Olympus. Here, according to the myth, was when Pegasus was bitten by a gadfly and threw Bellerophon to his doom. Or Zeus spooked Pegasus with a thunderclap. Or something of that nature. In any case, Socrates likened himself to the gadfly, incessantly nipping at Aethenian society to provoke them to deal with unpleasant subjects."
"So he tried to make society better by being a massive troll?" Natsuki asked.
"Basically, yeah," Monika nodded, "And in a similar manner, I want you to…well, troll me into a better person. Or something like that. Now that I think about it, this might be a better analogy. The Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, one of the better ones I might add, was said to have a servant whose job was to stand behind him during public events, like parades and Triumphs and such, and periodically whisper in his ear something to the effect of: "Remember, my lord, you are only a mortal man.""
"Ah. So you want me to give you grief to keep you humble," Natsuki surmised.
"Yes. Exactly." Monika frowned, then she giggled. "You really are good at taking something that seems complicated to me and making it simple as hell."
"It's what I do," Natsuki said with a grin, leaning back with her hands behind her head.
"So can you do that for me, Nat?"
"Do what? Spend what might possibly be the rest of eternity taking free shots at you? Sure. Sounds like a great way to exercise my pent-up aggression towards you."
"Thank you," Monika said, very gently. "Thank you, so much. I don't…I don't know how to explain to you how much this means to me, Natsuki. Thank you."
"Yeah…sure." Natsuki yawned hugely, then pulled up her legs and curled up in her seat. "I'mma sleep now, if you don't mind, Monika…"
"Okay. You do that, kid."
…
"And that's why Natsuki's been aggrieving me for millennia," Monika concluded.
Yuri stared thoughtfully into her teacup, as she had been doing since Monika had gotten to the 'Natsuki breaking shit' scene. "I see," she said slowly.
"You still don't like it," Monika observed. It wasn't a question. Yuri mutely shook her head.
Monika sighed. "Well, sorry to tell you, but I have no intention of telling her to stop. If she wants to stop, she's free to do so whenever she wants. But I'd strongly prefer that she doesn't stop. I…I take comfort in the role she plays, keeping my ego in check. I feel safer knowing that at least one of you girls doesn't trust me unconditionally. Natsuki's smart enough to go along with me when she has to, but she's also paranoid enough to expect me to do something horrible at any moment. Her contrariness is as important to my stability as your and Sayori's support."
"But!" Yuri gasped out loud, jerking her head up. "But Natsuki…she's a…it can't be good for her, playing that role. She's a bullying victim herself."
"I realize this," said Monika, "And again, I've never pressured her into this. I asked my friend for a favor, and she agreed to do so. If you can convince her to stop, more power to you." Then Monika smiled, "Although, the most you can do without going farther than I have is to simply ask her. If you try to coax her or apply any kind of pressure…well, then you're technically being more manipulative than me in this matter."
Yuri's frown deepened. Then she narrowed her eyes. She even bared her teeth, a bit. "I don't care how subtle you're being about it, you're still using her."
"Yes. Yes I am," Monika said bluntly. "That's what all relationships are, Yuri. People using each other. I mean, yes, I do genuinely like you girls, but ultimately our friendship is a means for us to avoid being alone. That's what friendship is. We seek out friends and companionship because human beings literally go insane without some kind of social interaction. We seek out love–those of us who aren't blessed to be aromantic, at least–because we feel empty and incomplete without it. I have no illusions about the fact that I "use" you three to keep my head on straight. The fact that I like you all so much makes it all the better."
"Damn it," Yuri hissed, burying her face in her hands, "You are so frustratingly pragmatic."
"In this context, I think you mean 'utilitarian'…but yeah, you've got a point there," said Monika. "But in any event, the difference between my friends and everyone else is that if I really need to, I won't hesitate to manipulate normal people to achieve a desirable goal. With the three of you, I respect your autonomy. Now, having explained everything to you, I'll ask you again. Do you understand that under no circumstances will I tolerate you "defending" me from Natsuki?" Monika asked, all levity gone from her voice.
Yuri lowered her hands and sighed. "Yes, Monika. I understand. I still don't like it, but…so long as you and Natsuki have an understanding about this, I suppose there's no point trying to interfere."
"Thank you, Yuri. That means a lot to me," Monika said with a smile. Then she snapped her fingers, and a moment later Sayori, Natsuki, and Hiroaka re-entered the room.
"So…everything cool?" Natsuki asked.
"Yeah, everything's cool," Yuri replied, smiling at her.
"She's lying," Sayori said bluntly, "But hey, I get it. It's a heavy thing to digest."
"Wait, you knew too?" Yuri asked.
At the same time, Monika and Natsuki said to each other, "You told her? No, I didn't, did you? No!" Then they stared at each other in confusion.
"Nobody told me, I figured it out for myself," Sayori said with a small pout. "Why do you guys keep forgetting that I'm not exactly the ditz I pretend to be? I mean, I'm surprised Yuri didn't already know. Natsuki's way too nice a person to hold a grudge against someone for this long."
Everyone just stared at Sayori for a good minute, and then Monika threw her head back and laughed. Natsuki blushed and rubbed the back of her head. Even Yuri chuckled under her breath.
Sayori folded her arms and huffed, "Jeez…as if I don't know my own friends like the back of my hand."
12.7 – Hat-suki, by Eastwind of Azarath.
(DDLC)/(A Hat in Time)
"Well, this is awkward," Hatsuki said from her spot atop Hat Kid's head. "I really wish Yggdrasil would just stop with the pun loops. I feel like im being punished, but i'm pretty sure I haven't done anything worth punishing!"
"I mean, you are clearly being punished, whether it's fair or not is a different matter." Hat Kid responded with a smirk and a giggle. Natsuki let out an exaggerated groan but said noting else. She couldn't bring herself to be mad at the girl. she was just too heckin' cute.
12.8 – FriendShipping
"So…?"
"No change," Sayori groaned as she flopped down on the pull-out couch. Next to her, Monika was laid out on her belly in a tank top and shorts, controller in hand, Falcon Punching Bowser in the face.
"Still in total denial?" Monika asked.
"Total denial," Sayori confirmed, "I'm not even sure if she realizes how hard she's in denial. I mean, Nat's usually pretty closed off, but…"
"Starting to wonder if we've got it wrong?" asked Monika.
"Absolutely not," said Sayori. She pulled herself up to a sitting position and rested her chin on her knees. "I know I'm not the brightest crayon in the knife drawer, but I know that they're soulmates. Soulmates, Monika! And their mutual blindness nettles me to no end! Toss me the other controller; Zelda vs. Sheik, right now."
Instead, Monika paused the game. She lazily rolled over onto her back and sat up, crossing her legs. "But what if, and hear me out here, what if we're wrong? I mean, we're both pretty desperate for them to be happy. And we're both kind of biased to the idea of unrequited love. It's not impossible that we're projecting on them."
Sayori sighed. "Look, you're not wrong. But we both know how they really feel about each other. I mean, half of Natsuki's poems from Baseline are about Yuri! Specifically 'I'll Be Your Beach'. She wants to be Yuri's beach, Monika. I'm not sure what that means, really, but it sounds romantic to me!"
"But is that Natsuki's heart, or the script?" Monika asked.
"Yeah, I've thought about that," admitted Sayori, "But there's no fooling Force Empathy, Monika."
"Even though Yuri and Natsuki are both very guarded people?"
"That does make reading them trickier," Sayori admitted, falling backwards on the bed. "But being as familiar with them as I am gets around that. You know I'm not the most confident person, but I know how they feel about each other."
Monika flopped down on her side, next to Sayori. "Sayori…maybe we should back off? I mean, if they really, truly love each other, they'll get around to admitting it to themselves eventually. As much time as they spend together, it's bound to come out someday, somehow. There's no need for us to meddle."
Sayori rolled onto her side, facing Monika, and gave her a sort of half-pouty look. "How can you call it 'meddling'? We're not getting involved for our own sakes, we're getting involved because we care about them and want them to be happy!"
"But are we sure we don't benefit from it in some way?" asked Monika, "I'm obsessed with atonement, and you're a disciple of Pinkie Pie. Also, we're both lovesick, so there could be that whole 'vicarious romance' angle to it. Kinda creepy, not gonna lie."
"Lovesick?!" Sayori reeled back a bit.
Monika narrowed her eyes. "Yes, Sayori. Lovesick. Both of us, and you know it's true."
Sayori rolled back onto her back and blew her bangs out of her face. "Yeah…I guess you're right…so, you think we should back off?"
"Well, strictly speaking, we haven't actually gotten too involved…just poking and prodding some. And there's nothing wrong with that, just so long as we don't get too pushy. If they ever get together, it can't be because we manipulated them."
Sayori chuckled, "Well, hearing that from you, I guess I can't disagree. I just want them to stop dancing around each other!"
She squeaked in surprise when Monika pulled her into an unexpected hug. "Just ride it out, Sayori," she said, "Nature abhors unresolved romantic plotlines; they always get resolved one way or another."
Just then, Natsuki burst into the room. "Alright! Who's ready for Halo Night?!" she asked excitedly. Then she noticed Sayori and Monika, and blushed. As Yuri was walking in behind her, Natsuki grabbed her by the arm and hauled back out of the room. "Sorry for interrupting you!" she yelled back as she fled.
Monika gave an agitated sigh. "They're going to give us 'knowing glances' for loops now."
"To be fair, you have your legs wrapped around me," Sayori pointed out.
"I don't half-ass anything! Not even hugs!" Monika declared as she pushed away from Sayori and returned to her game.
"Sure, sure," said Sayori as she jumped off the pull-out and started out of the room. "Get the Xbox started, I'll explain the sitcom misunderstanding."
12.9 – Gat-suki, by Eastwind of Azarath.
(DDLC)/(Saints Row)
Monika listened as she worked to a, as far as Monika could tell(particularly due to a lack of any Pings throughout the loop so far), unAwake Natsuki telling her tale. Though this Loop, Natsuki seemed to be replacing the local Anchor, Johnny Gat. Thus, as per tradition it seemed, Natsuki had yet another name. Tukiko Gat, aka: Gat Tsuki.
"You're tellin' me that Zinyak abducted you years before his invasion because he thought you single-handedly could stop him?" The man called King asked to confirm the story being told.
"Yeah," the pink haired woman replied with a smirk. She then promptly sent out a Ping, causing Monika to look up and roll her eyes. That better not go to her head. She then continued her doubled work of both finishing up the needed steps to pull off the plan that King had proposed earlier, as well as her own personal project of sampling and copying some of the code for the pseudo-Matrix simulation that this Loop was currently dealing with. You never know when some of the stuff might be useful.
12.10 – This Will Definitely End Well, by Awesomedude17.
It was a Hub Loop and apparently Yuri and Natsuki were roommates. Needless to say, it was awkward at times, but they managed.
Of course, some things they could talk about had either been talked about or were eventually going to be talked about.
"Natsuki, I just had a thought."
"What is it, Yuri?" Natsuki looked up from her laptop as she paused a video.
"Sayori and Monika have been really close, haven't they?"
"...You know what... yeah, they have."
"Do you think that they might be dating?"
"Now? Not really. Soon? Maybe? I don't know."
"Why?"
"Well Monika is basically a god in our Branch and Sayori isn't."
"But she's next in line."
"Yeah. Honestly, I don't know what to think about those two. I mean, I like the idea of those two being together."
"So do I. Maybe we can give them a helpful nudge."
Natsuki thought on it. "I think we could. Several nudges."
"Good. It's settled."
"Yep," Natsuki resumed the video and within a few seconds widened her eyes.
"Ew,"
"What?" Yuri looked over to see a yellow thing get mulched by an airplane turbine. "What the!"
"Happy Tree Friends? This is not at all what I was expecting. Never watching this again."
"Yeah."
12.11 – Sat-suki…wait, what's the joke the joke there?, by Eastwind of Azarath.
(DDLC)/(Kill la Kill)
"You know, this isn't so bad. Sure, it's a Pun Loop. But to be fair, it's a pretty badass loop too." Natsuki, or rather... Satsuki, found herself muttering under her breath.
This loop, she was replacing Satsuki Kiryuin. The older sister of Ryuuko Matoi, the anchor of the current Loop she was in. Well, she would be if it weren't for the fact that her memories told her that the name of the girl was Monika Matoi. Well, it gives Natsuki a good excuse to beat the crap out of Monika at the least. With that train of thought, Natsuki decided to Stealth for the beginning of the loop.
Compiler's Commentary:
12.1: Friendly reminder that with the proper Japanese pronunciation, "Natsuki" has a long 'a' sound and the 'u' is silent, like "Knots-key", not "Nat-su-key." Now, if anyone needs me, I'll be in my Weeb Cave.
12.2: In which Sarge proves to be surprisingly progressive for a man with a Southern accent.
12.3: So imagine that you have two mirrors facing each other with nothing between them…but each mirror is also a one-way window, and one has four pseudo-Japanese schoolgirls behind it, and the other has a fish with a person's face behind it.
12.4: Smug-Yuri is like correcting your math teacher; it doesn't happen often, but damn if it isn't great when it does.
12.5: Have you ever played Yume Nikki with the Nightmare On Elm Street version of that one nursery rhyme as background music? Do you sleep well at night? If the answer to both questions is 'yes', then there is something very wrong with you.
12.6: Friends sometimes make odd requests of each other.
12.7: At this point, you could say that these puns are old hat to Natsuki…I'll show myself out.
12.8: Look, everyone ships their friends. Sometimes with other friends they have, sometimes with others. Everyone does it, there's nothing creepy about it. It's when you write real-life fanfiction about shipping your friends when it gets creepy.
…so what's that make me in this situation?
12.9: Suffice to say, the other girls were incredibly jealous when Natsuki showed off her authentic Jane Austen autograph the next time she saw them.
12.10: No, seriously, why are you all looking so worried?
12.11: …oh! Now I get it!