Compiler's Commentary: This is the first compilation chapter of the Literature Club Loopers' first visit to Remnant. Parts 1-10 and 12 were all written by Masterweaver. Part 11 was written by yours truly at Masterweaver's request; apparently they like the way I handle fight scenes? Anyways, there will be more of this loop later on. For now, enjoy!

Chapter 16 – Doki Doki Huntress Team, Volume 1.1
(DDLC)/(RWBY)
(By Masterweaver, mostly, featuring a part written by me)

Part 1

There were advantages to being a semi-immortal wizard person in charge of a school devoted to training warriors against the ever-encroaching darkness. For instance: a mastery of paperwork.

Oh, yes, Glynda did most of the actual signing and organizing and all that, but that was mechanical. Ozpin could look at a file and read between the lines. Jaune Arc's entry, for instance-a desperate forgery, made by somebody who wanted to be somebody, and in Ozpin's experience that sort of urge could be tempered well if given proper mentorship. Or this, a Blake Belladonna-the name alone brought forth memories, and the quiet lack of answers, the way she avoided the box of unique needs... he'd petitioned to remove the faunus checkbox from application forms decades ago and gotten it out, but there were still marks of those on the run that whispered through the lines. And of course young Ruby Rose-so quick and eager, and yet precise. So practiced. She had her life planned, certainly, and had taken advantage of the Roman situation with almost ethereal ease.

Yes, Ozpin could easily judge a character through their acceptance paperwork. His hands brushed over the various documents arrayed on his desk-mostly digital, here and there an old-fashioned sheet with ink. There were the usual collection of unusuals-the champion that wanted to escape fame, the heiress that wanted to earn honor, the orphans that wanted to prevent tragedy, the drifter who had no clue what to do with life. And of course, there were the more mundane sort, those who became Huntsmen because they liked to fight, or they sought power, or even just because their family was made of huntsmen. True, there was a bit more... connection, this year. The witch was making moves in the dark, and that always rattled a few more prominent oddities loose. For the most part, this was all expected.

For the most part.

His eyes landed on one particular quartet of entries though. All from the same village, one that had been destroyed fairly recently. Survivors with nowhere else to go. That was tragic, but not unexpected. They were all physical submissions, with elegant handwriting and calligraphy, and they all cited each other as character references. A band of friends joining up; again, not unusual.

But reading between the lines...

Natsuki had emphasized her brutality and efficiency, and her comments about the others were barbed-friendly, but barbed. She was also the only one to mention any parents-with disdain, but she did mention them. One of them. Yuri had provided an almost elegant description of the group's weapons, describing what they were capable of in great, poetic detail, and incidentally showing an expert knowledge of medicine. Sayori had a strange... disconnect to her writing, polite and friendly and definitely praising the others, while only describing herself as acceptable.

And Monika...

Monika's documentation was perfect. Every question answered exactly. Every detail about the others, and herself, outlined in loving detail. Every potential issue acknowledged, and a solution presented. Her tone was friendly, charming, respectful. If this were released to the public, many people would hold it up as a paragon of applications. It was perfect. Too perfect.

Ozpin had seen perfect applications before. They rarely marked perfect people. In his experience, they marked the incredibly dangerous.

Still... she'd been accepted, as had the others. There was no good way to deny them, and at least in Beacon, they'd be where he could see them.

Of course, if he'd been Awake, he would have been both less and more paranoid. Especially if he'd known all four of the girls were Awake as well.

Part 2

"...so most faunus with retractable claws actually have... fingernail claws. Dad, Tukson... having full-on paws is not actually that common, except in variant loops."

"Yeah, I'd have preferred ears, but I can work with this." Natsuki rotated her pink-furred paw thoughtfully. "I mean, not having a functional thumb sucks, don't get me wrong, but give me a wristband with a hook and I should be alright."

"Monika and I can rig you up something, given a few days." Yuri tapped her chin. "Actually, how do fingernail claws even work, mechanically? If they're retractable, there should be... some sort of muscular mechanism, and how would that fit in the finger?"

Blake gave her a pointed frown. "You are not vivisecting my father's hand."

"Wh-no! Obviously not!" Yuri protested, trying to backpedal. "I'm just, I'm just curious! There are medical texts, right? I can look at books."

"If you think that's weird," interjected a blonde as she walked up, "you should see Trifa. Organic wrist-grown webshooters, now there's a real medical mystery."

Blake rolled her eyes. "Marvel does it sometimes."

"Marvel genetics are hax and you know it." The blonde looked over the quartet. "So, you're the Doki Dokis, huh?"

"That's right," Monika said, standing up. "I'm Monika, and this is Sayori, Yuri, and Natsuki. I'm guessing you're Yang Xiao Long?"

"Yep! Ruby's a bit busy at the moment, but she should meet up with us during Ozpin's speech."

"What's she doing?"

"This is... one of those loops where Salem put a little mental leash on Cinder," Yang explained. "The moment she Woke Up, Cinder broke it-she hates mind-altering stuff-but Salem's stupidly clever for a baseline villain so she's already relocated. Ruby's just scouring her old base for clues and trying to track down Tyrian... maybe going to talk to Leo as well."

Monika smiled politely. "...Right..."

"...You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?"

"Not a clue, sorry. I know we should have done more investigation, but our last hub loop was before we met Blake, sooooo..."

"Okay. First of all, protip: We have a spinoff called RWBY Chibi, alternate between that and the main RWBY series after you finish volume three. It's a regular variant for us. Second, the mangas are... sort of in-between baseline, not guaranteed to happen but can flesh out details. Third, we do have some spinoff games, Grimm Eclipse is set between volumes two and three, Crosstag Battle isn't baseline but it's a semi-regular fused loop, and Amity Coliseum is... basically a simulation set in the whole Vytal tournament preliminaries but not really baseline beyond that. And finally... Blake?"

"Yes, Yang?"

"We're not telling them about Initiation."

Blake opened her mouth, paused, and shrugged. "Alright, fair enough."

Sayori frowned. "We should know about that already, though. Did we not ask Emerald when she visited?"

"We were too busy trying to prove ourselves the gaming masters," Monika reminded her.

"Wait, but weren't you Pyrrha and Penny's daughter that one time?" Sayori asked.

Monika rubbed the back of her head. "Yeeeeeeeah, they told me they died in their baseline, and I kind of got the impression they didn't want to talk about it, so I didn't... ask..."

"And what about Cinder's notes from the elevator?"

"'My name is Cinder Fall, This is an Elevator Glitch, I am from Remnant, Talk to Ruby if you're ever there.' All scrawled out on one sheet. I think she was operating under a time limit."

Sayori tilted her head. "Huh. Hold on. If this is an anime-Natsuki, did you ever get records from the Hub?"

"I tried, but I couldn't find the original Japanese."

"Actually," Yang commented with some amusement, "we're an American-created anime. Texas-based internet company, Rooster Teeth."

"Well that explains it," Natsuki said dryly.

There was a moment of silence.

"...We really suck at loop research, don't we?" Yuri finally managed.

Yang shrugged. "Eh, we'll give you a copy of the show later. So anyway, why don't we head for the auditorium? Jaune's not Awake, so Weiss is going to go find him and wrangle him to the proper place..."

Part 3

"And Jaune should be sorted for the moment," a white-haired girl said as she joined the group. "Yang, Blake-and our visitors, I take it?"

Monika nodded, holding out her hand. "Monika, Doki Doki Literature Club Anchor and president. And you're Weiss, right?"

"Weiss Schnee, second of Remnant. A pleasure, of course. I'm sorry if I seem distracted, Ruby isn't back yet-"

"Sorry!" shouted a voice over the crowd. "Sorry, sorry. Beacon! First year! Wooo! Excuse me, I just need to squeeze by here-"

A girl with blood-red hair and silver eyes squeezed in next to Weiss. "Hey Weiss! And..."

"The Doki Doki Loopers," Weiss said, gesturing to the four girls. "Monika is the Anchor, and these are Sayori, Yuri, and Natsuki. Girls, this is Ruby Rose, the local Anchor."

"Ah! Sorry, I didn't have time to check the texts," Ruby said apologetically. "Uh, welcome to Remnant, have you seen the show?"

"No," Sayori said flatly. "And we're not supposed to be told about Initiation, apparently."

"Okay, fair, we'll cover your combat skills later-I really do want to talk to all of you, but there's some stuff I need to cover with Weiss first." Ruby bit her lip. "Well, actually, that's stupid, if you're looping you should know too. Leo's dead."

Weiss balked a bit. "Really? So soon?"

"There was an outgoing message claiming he was 'ill' and that he'd run huntsman assignments from his bedroom. That sounded suspicious, so I checked-it was a Watts hacking program, running his stuff on automatic. I found Leo in his bed-strangled and stabbed. Seer, most likely." The girl sighed. "I mean, sure, he's a horrible coward, but... anyway, I spray-painted a big White Fang emblem on the door, hopefully that'll get the police to investigate."

"As well as tip off Ozpin to the traitor in his ranks via the unique death, and have Sienna double-check her ranks for extremists, thus revealing Adam's schemes." Weiss nodded. "Did Cinder get the chance to employ him this loop?"

"No... which means he's running around unsupervised, unless Ilia is Awake."

"I'm going to have to deal with that," Blake grumbled.

Yuri rose a hand. "Um... excuse me? What's going on?"

"Local shadow-war politics," Weiss explained. "Our big bad-well, bigger bad, if one considers Cinder-is unfortunately not well defined in baseline, so she's very loop variable. But she is thousands of years old and has operated in the shadows that whole time... essentially, she tends to be incredibly adaptable, even with looping foreknowledge."

"And when Cinder Woke Up this loop, that apparently got Salem paranoid enough to cut off anything Cinder could realistically have known about-hence Leo's murder." Ruby sighed. "And with Adam not being part of the plan, he's a wildcard-dangerous in a different way. Salem's the ages-old schemer, Adam's just the local sociopath."

Yang scoffed. "Just, she says."

"...Not that he isn't important to us personally," Ruby clarified. "I'm talking globally."

Yuri swallowed. "Erm-"

"You are our guests," Weiss emphasized, "and we won't drag you into our messes. But we also know that unnecessary secrecy can cause problems. We're just reviewing the situation in case this somehow ends up affecting you."

"Butterflies, butterflies everywhere." Ruby groaned. "Anyway, though, besides that. How's your time on Remnant been?"

"Well," Natsuki mused, "before we Woke Up our village was destroyed by the Grimm and we had to hike through the wilderness to a port town that didn't have anyone who cared for us which is why we took the first boat we could to Sanus and hiked through even more wilderness to Vale which involved some run-ins with a few White Fang groups that didn't like these three. Also, my father was a racist prick who beat me for being a half-breed, but that's probably just a carry-over from our universe's baseline. We only Awoke yesterday, though, so... it's been pretty good."

There was an awkward pause.

"...Yeeeeeeah, okay." Ruby looked at them. "As soon as we're somewhere where it's not going to freak out the non-Loopers, I am giving you all a big hug and a bunch of cookies."

Part 4

"~Pajamas, pajamas, weeeee have, pajamas!~"

Monika chuckled as Sayori skipped around. "It's the little things, I guess."

"Yeah, it sure is." Ruby smiled a little. "I mean, sure, there's a lot going on in baseline, but I've always been happiest when I could be just Ruby Rose, Eater of Cookies and Slayer of Grimm."

"Mmm. It's not as hard for me-do you, uh... do you know about our baseline?"

"...Rooster Teeth did a Let's Play," Ruby replied. "So... yes."

Monika swallowed. "Right. Well. I'm... not like that anymore-"

"Monika, it's fine, really. You don't need to reassure me. I know better than most that reformation in the loops is possible."

"Right. Cinder."

"Yeah."

The two of them watched as Sayori tried to drag Yuri and Natsuki into her happy pajama dance, with very little success.

"So, hey," Ruby asked, "what's your weapon?"

"Hmm? Oh." Monika chuckled. "Yeah, in our pre-Awake backstory the only one of us that was planning to be a Huntress was Yuri. But during the... whole thing, where our village was destroyed..."

"Yeah?"

"I picked up guns. Lots of guns. Big ones, small ones, whatever the dead left behind, and... shot every Grimm I could find. Also apparently discovered my semblance-that's what it's called, right, the personal superpower?"

"Yeah, that's right," Ruby confirmed. "You might be able to carry it over into future loops, even."

"Well... that could come in handy," Monika mused.

"Oooooh, wachyagit?"

"Detail-oriented technopathy. I can deconstruct and reconstruct machines at will, reorganizing their internal components... putting pieces from one machine into another, I guess..."

"Oh, wow." Ruby gave her a mock glare. "Stay away from my girlfriend."

"What?"

"Penny Polendina, she's a top-secret Atlas project to create a robot with aura. We're dating-well, in the loops, not baseline."

Monika nodded. "Actually, there was this loop where I apparently was Penny and Pyrrha's artificial daughter-"

"Really?!" Ruby's grin grew wide and excited. "So you're my niece?!"

"No! No." Monika waved her hands deflectively. "We all agreed it was just loop weirdness, wouldn't carry over."

"Awwww," Ruby whined. "I like being an aunt."

"Does... does that happen often for you?"

"Yang adopted a girl with Blake, and our baby brother from the Yo-Kai universe has his own adopted son, so..."

Monika nodded. "I was warned about the Remnant Looping Family Tree."

"Yeah, I guess it's pretty tangled." Ruby laughed. "But, you know, you can choose your family."

The other anchor turned to watch Natsuki chasing a laughing Sayori and Yuri around the room. "...I guess..."

"...So your weapon?"

"Hmm? Oh." Monika shook her head. "Right, it's... basically a bunch of gun parts that I jury-rigged together. Hand pistols, boot pistols, a belt that unfolds into a shotgun or a baton... I'm mostly a martial arts fighter, but my semblance does let me manipulated machines I can touch so, you know."

"Cool. We name our weapons here-I mean, it's not universal technically, but a lot of us do, so..."

"Oh, hmm..." Monika shrugged. "...Rough Draft? I'm calling it Rough Draft."

"Appropriate," Ruby said approvingly.

"Thank you."

"...You know what? I can ask the others about their weapons later." Ruby yawned. "Got a big day tomorrow, initiation and all that."

"Can I get a hint about what to expect?"

"Hmmm. Well..." Ruby tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Fresh air."

"Fresh air?"

"Yep. Lots of fresh air."

"...That is remarkably unhelpful."

"And I am remarkably tired." Ruby pulled the blindfold over her eyes, casually dodging around the traipsing Doki Loopers. "Get some sleeping bags, girls, you're going to need to rest up!"

Part 5

"...Was Jaune flirting with Weiss back in the locker room?" Yuri asked Yang in disbelief.

"Yeah, he does that."

"I thought he was supposed to be married to Pyrrha."

"The looping versions are. Baseline though..." Yang shrugged. "At this point, Jaune has a mild but persistent case of toxic masculinity induced insecurity, and Pyrrha's still not sure how to be anything but the Mistral champion. Weiss tolerates the flirting mostly so she can clue him in on Pyrrha's crush later, once they've established a good friendship."

"Hmm. What about that Cardin guy that was hitting on Monika?"

Yang rolled her eyes. "Schoolyard bully. I want to say racist jerk, but he's horrible to everyone equally. Honestly, we usually knock some sense into him during the first weeks of school. Or prank the heck out of him. You know, petty warm-ups for the serious shenanigans."

"Uh... huh."

"Oh hey, do me a solid?" She tossed a can each to her and the other Dokis. "If you run into any non-Grimm corvids, hit 'em with this knockout gas, and if they have red eyes put 'em in your subspace pocket, I'll look over them tonight."

"...Local shadow war politics?"

"Only partially. Oh hey, here we are," Yang said with a grin as all the students came up to a cliff edge. "Pick a tile, any tile."

She took a position on a silver square with the emblem of Vale embossed on it. Yuri glanced at the other local Loopers, already sauntering onto their own squares, and shared a look with the other Doki club members. Monika shrugged helplessly, poking a tile with a foot-and then rolled her eyes.

"What?" Natsuki asked. "What is it?"

"Really girls?" Monika turned to the locals. "Really?"

"Shhh-shh shh!" Ruby giggled, tilting her head subtly toward Jaune.

"Oh fine." Monika stepped onto the tile with a roll of her eyes. "Sayori, next to me, Yuri and Nats can take those two."

The headmaster and his assistant watched the final group step onto the squares. Ozpin cleared his throat. "For years, you have trained to become warriors, and today, your abilities will be evaluated in the Emerald Forest."

"Now, I'm sure many of you have heard rumors about the assignment of 'teams,'" Glynda said firmly. "Well, allow us to put an end to your confusion. Each of you will be given teammates... today."

"What a shocker!" Natuski quipped with mock surprise.

"These teammates will be with you for the rest of your time here at Beacon," Ozpin continued. "So it is in your best interest to be paired with someone with whom you can work well. That being said, the first person you make eye contact with after landing will be your partner for the next four years."

"Hooray plot," Monika grumbled.

"See?" came a voice further up the line. "I ~told~ you!"

"After you've partnered up, make your way to the northern end of the forest. You will meet opposition along the way. Do not hesitate to destroy everything in your path... or you will die." Ozpin ignored the nervous laugh from Jaune and the eye-rolling scoff from Natsuki. "You will be monitored and graded through the duration of your initiation, but our instructors will not intervene. You will find an abandoned temple at the end of the path containing several relics. Each pair must choose one and return to the top of the cliff. We will regard that item, as well as your standing, and grade you appropriately. Are there any questions?"

"Could you be any more of a cliché?" Natsuki asked dryly.

"He doesn't have a beard," Sayori pointed out.

"Question withdrawn."

Ozpin's lips quirked. "Very good. Now, take your positions."

"I'll synchronize my tile with Sayori's," Monika said in a low voice. "Yuri, you've got a tracking semblance this loop?"

"Uh, sir?" Jaune asked. "I've got, um... a question."

"Yep," Yuri confirmed as Weiss and Blake were launched into the air. "Nats, I'll be coming after you. Keep quiet and alive till we meet up."

"So, this landing... strategy thing..." Jaune continued. "Uh, wha-what is it? You're, like, dropping us off or something?"

"No," Ozpin said dryly. "You will be falling."

Natsuki smirked, claws gripping the handles of a thick hammer as more students were tossed into the forest. "Don't keep me waiting, girl, I might just go on a rampage."

"Oh, uh, I see..." Jaune glanced around. "So, like, did you hand out parachutes for us?"

"No." Ozpin adjusted his glasses. "You will be using your own 'landing strategy.'"

"Uh-huh... Yeah."

Monika rolled her eyes. "Jaune, look left."

"Wha-?" Jaune glanced left just in time to see Ruby wink at him-and then get launched after her sister. "Wait, hold on, whaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Natsuki smirked. "It's that moment of dawning comprehension I live for."

Anything anybody was going to say was cut off when the four of them were catapulted into the forest below.

Part 6

"Wow. Yuri, you look like shit."

Yuri flung her hair in a melodramatic arc. "Tis but a few dozen scratches."

"Yeah, across your entire body!" Natsuki pointed out. "What, did you smash through a tree?"

"Only half of one." Yuri idly pulled a few splinters from her shoulder. "And this Aura stuff is handling all the crucial problems, so..."

Natsuki threw up a paw. "You know the professors are watching us, right? They're going to grade you on your performance. You think looking like a refugee from the blender convention will win you any points?"

"Nats. Are you. Are you seriously. Worried about my grade."

Natsuki opened her mouth... paused... and shook her head. "Whatever. Look, just... I don't know, let's get moving I guess. Try not to bleed too much, we don't want to attract panthers."

"I wouldn't mind, they can be quite fun to play with."

Whatever Natsuki was about to say in reply was cut off when something came barreling through the brush. She swung the massive hammer in her hand without a second thought, smashing it into a tree, and only belatedly realized it was three somethings-well, only two now, the big black bear-like creature was dissolving into smoke.

"Heeeeeeeey," whined one of the other somethings. "We were using that!"

"Look both ways before crossing the street, kid." Natsuki slung her hammer over her shoulder, holding out a paw to the something, which turned out to be a girl with orange hair.

"Now hold on," Yuri countered, "that doesn't make sense Nats. They were the ones with the vehicle which means that we'd be the pedestrians. Looking both ways would be our responsibility, not theirs."

"In that case," Natsuki huffed as she pulled the new girl to her feet, "I should say something about the right of way, shouldn't I?"

The other something-a boy with long black hair in a ponytail-gave her an odd look as he stood. "Right of way?"

"Traffic laws," Natsuki explained. "What, you don't know those?"

"Vale specific," Yuri reminded her. "Maybe Atlas. Most other roads aren't well traveled."

The two newcomers stared at her for a moment.

"Um..." The girl cleared her throat. "Are you... running low on aura?"

"Hmm? Oh, the scratches." Yuri smiled. "No, no, I prefer to use my aura only when absolutely necessary."

"She has a pain fetish," Natsuki said flatly.

"Not a fetish," Yuri corrected. "A fetish would just... turn me on. I can enjoy pain in a non-sexual manner."

The other two stared at her warily.

"I'm not going to start cutting myself," Yuri said flatly. "We're in the middle of a Grimm-infested forest, it would be incredibly stupid to cut myself right now."

"She also likes digging holes!" Natsuki said brightly.

"Natsuki, just..." Yuri sighed, dragging a palm down her face. "See, this is why I don't talk to people. I never mean to weird them out, but I... look, can we start over?" She stuck out a hand. "Hi, I'm Yuri."

"...I'm... Nora, and this is Ren." The girl took the hand with a hesitant smile. "So... uh... I don't know, do you like pancakes?"

"Oh, they're amazing! Natsuki here makes the best pancakes."

"Really?" Nora crossed her arms with a smirk. "Are you sure? Cause I think Ren's pancakes are better."

"We'll have a big cooking duel on Saturday," Natsuki offered. "That sound good to you, Ren?"

"I... suppose," Ren agreed, still keeping wary eyes on Yuri.

"Hey, it could be worse," Yuri said. "Our friend Sayori? Her semblance is actually becoming a beacon for Grimm."

Nora winced. "Yeeeowch. That's got to be terrible for her."

Natsuki snorted. "I mean, yeah, plus everyone goes on about how she must have 'Grimm blood' when they find out, so you can't tell anyone who doesn't already know alright?"

"Yeah, alright..." Nora nodded, then blinked. "Hey! You've got a hammer too?"

"Yep. Well, no. Well, it didn't start life as a hammer..."

Part 7

"Uh, hey! Could I get a little help?"

Monika looked up at the boy with a smirk. "Nope. I know better than to get between a huntress and her prey."

"That is a good shot though," Sayori added. "Pinned through the hood with a spear? Whoever wants you must be a master with that."

"Yeah, especially if she did it mid-flying through the air." At a rustle from the bushes, Monika glanced over her shoulder and grinned. "What do you think, Pyrrha? Is it an impressive shot or what?"

The young redhead emerged, awkwardly rubbing her head. "Hello again..."

"Um, hey!" Jaune waved at her. "Thanks for the help, you know, with the landing... strategy thing. Could you, um, get me down from here?"

"Me and Monika are already partners," Sayori added, "so if you want to claim your prize we aren't going to stop you."

Pyrrha blushed lightly, jumping up and grabbing her spear. "It's not like that, really!" she protested as Jaune fell down.

"Not yet," Monika agreed. "Give it time."

"But don't wait too long," Sayori added.

Monika rolled her eyes. "You know we can't force things, Sayori."

"You can't maybe, but I'm a Sith."

"There's a difference between force and The Force!"

"Yep, and I know all about it. Come on, Monika, don't you want to see this happen?"

"See what happen?" asked Jaune as he brushed himself off.

"You two fall in love," Monika explained flatly. "Which is going to happen no matter what we do, so we should let them go at their own pace," she added firmly to Sayori.

"Wait, what?" Jaune pointed at Pyrrha. "Her and me? She could do so much better."

Sayori winced. "Oooo, low self-esteem, pitfall number one."

"I'm sure you're a nice person," Pyrrha assured Jaune.

"The reassurance technique, minimal effort," Monika noted. "Not quite enough to circumnavigate the pitfall, what do you think Sayori?"

"Well it was genuine, though the wording could have been constructed better-"

Pyrrha rolled her eyes. "If you're going to speculate about my love life, couldn't you do it on network forums like normal people?"

"We aren't speculating," Monika corrected her. "We're observing."

"You said we were going to fall in love, that counts as speculation."

"Ordinarily," Sayori agreed, "but Monika and I have both been gods."

Monika smirked at her. "You were only a god for three seconds, miss hot potato."

"But I still retain the clarity of vision I had back then."

"And being gods is entirely irrelevant to how we know they're going to end up together. The time travel thing is completely different from the god thing."

"I don't think we know because of time travel, technically, I think we know because of our friends from another world who themselves time traveled."

"Oh yeah, good point." Monika turned back to Pyrrha and Jaune. "We know you'll be married because our time traveling alien friends told us."

Pyrrha and Jaune stared at them for a moment.

"...O...kay then." The blonde cleared his throat. "So, what about we just go searching for that relic, that we're supposed to find...?"

"Do you want us all to go together," Monika asked, "or should we step aside so Pyrrha can activate your aura?"

"I think we'd rather keep you in-wait." Pyrrha frowned. "Activate his aura?"

"Oh, you didn't notice?" Sayori shrugged. "Must be our godly senses. Go on, then, do the thing, we'll be waiting for you two up ahead."

Part 8

"...so Chekhov gets speared by this... what do you call them, the wasp Grimm? Anyway, he's dead, so I grab his turret and tear it off the stand, then I start smashing Grimm with it. I mean I'm lucky I found that bowl of candy, my semblance is getting a strength boost off of sugar-funky, right? And a few minutes later I find the other three at the center of a Grimm convergence and I figure out how to get the, you know, gun part of Chekhov's Gun working again. And that's sort of how my weapon got its name, Chekhov's Gun. Because it was a gun used by Chekhov and there's also that literary technique, called Chekhov's gun, so it fits with the theme."

Nora stared at her. "What do you mean?"

Natsuki rolled her eyes. "You know, Chekhov's Gun? 'If there's a rifle over the fireplace in act one, it has to be fired by act three.' It's a story thing, story-tellers don't mention things unless they're going to play a role in the story later on."

"Unless they're trying to be deliberately tedious and silly," Yuri pointed out. "Or subvert expectations."

"Well, yeah, but you have to understand the basics before you subvert them, right?"

"True, I suppose. Anyway, that's how Natsuki got her weapon."

"I... suppose that's an interesting story," Ren allowed, rubbing an arm.

"I'm guessing you two made your weapons yourself?" Yuri asked. "They seem pretty well-constructed."

Nora nodded. "Yes. This is Magnihild, it can turn into a grenade launcher, and Ren has Stormflower-they're a pair of guns with knives!"

"Ooooooo," Yuri purred, leaning toward the boy. "You must be quite the lady-killer, hmmm?"

"Um," said Ren.

Nora quickly shoved herself between them. "Hey! Don't-uh... don't make him uncomfortable, got it?"

"Oh. Of course." Yuri smirked. "I should have known you two were an item."

"Uh-n-no! I mean, yes, we're childhood friends, but, but we're not together-together-"

"Yuri, stop teasing the shy mutual crush kids," Natsuki deadpanned.

"But they're so cute when they're flustered!" Yuri squealed. "Look at them they're the exact same shade of pink Nats look!"

Natsuki glanced over at the blushing Ren and Nora. "Huh. Yeah, that is kind of freaky. Protip, kids, get over whatever it is that's stopping you from romancing each other or you'll get people like Yuri constantly fussing over you."

"I'm not that bad!"

"Yeah, Sayori's worse. At least Monika is subtle... when she wants to be." Natsuki shrugged. "Me, I'll just say it: You two should kiss."

"So!" Ren said, a little too loudly. "Yuri, what's your weapon story?"

"Actually I'm pretty much the only one of us that designed my weapon." Yuri held up her arm. "Bracers with spring-loaded Dust daggers. I can smack a pair together to shoot the elements included, but frankly, I like to get up close and personal. I call them Poetic Justice."

"Oh!" Nora nodded. "That's cool."

"Man, how long have we been walking?" Natsuki grumbled. "I mean I know we needed to head toward the relics, but geeze. I would have hoped we would have run into some Grimm by now."

"Oh, there's a whole horde over there," Yuri said, gesturing casually. "I've just been leading us around them because, you know, I wanted to talk to the kids."

"Wait." Ren frowned. "You can sense Grimm?"

"Well, my semblance is aura tracking. Grimm don't have an aura. It's more like I can sense where the aura isn't, if that makes sense." She concentrated. "Seems like a pack of Beowolves, twelve, fourteen... probably less than twenty."

Natsuki frowned. "Would going through them get us to the relics any faster?"

"Probably not, the relics are more that-a-way, I'm guessing..."

"Ugh. Fine, we'll ignore them for now, but if a horde of Grimm gets in our way, let's kill them."

"I'm with Nats!" Nora chirped.

"We're still going to insist you two get together," Natsuki said flatly.

Part 9

"...so there was this one kid in our village that was absolutely convinced I was your daughter."

"What?"

"Yep. Apparently, we look similar enough and, you know, he was six and didn't get why the lack of age difference would be a problem. And you know, he was a kid. I tried to convince him, but he got it into his head that I was keeping the whole thing secret because you'd sent me to scout out new recruits for your super squad or something."

Pyrrha rolled her eyes. "Well, I do hate to disappoint, but I can safely say I am not a mother."

Monika hummed noncommittally. "I mean, that's true as far as it goes..."

"She's not your mother," Sayori said dryly. "Do you even need a mother?"

"It'd be nice," Monika admitted quietly.

The quartet was silent for a few moments as they traversed the forest.

"So this kid," Jaune said eventually. "The one that thought you were Pyrrha's daughter-"

"Probably dead. Grimm attack on our village. Me, Sayori, Yuri, and Nats got out together, but we haven't run into any other survivors."

"...Oh."

Monika smiled faintly. "Of course, that's why we came here. To make sure what happened to Dokishiori doesn't happen again, if we can stop it."

"That and the free room and board," Sayori added.

"I thought I was supposed to be the cynical one?"

"No, Nats is the cynical one. I'm the one that cheers everyone up. You're stepping on my turf, Prez."

Monika rolled her eyes. "Fine, fine. So Jaune, how're you holding up?"

"Huh? Oh, I'm alright," Jaune assured them. "You don't need to worry about anything."

"Mmm, do we chalk that one up to toxic masculinity?" Sayori asked.

"No, this isn't nearly that bad," Monika replied. "It's the usual stiff upper lip most people have."

Jaune groaned. "You know, I can hear you."

"Oh, don't worry, you're doing extremely well," Monika assured him. "Sayori and I are just busybodies."

"That much is clear," Pyrrha muttered.

"Oooooo! Breaking the shell already!" Sayori grinned. "I knew master Pinkie's lessons would help!"

Monika tilted her head. "Are these Sith lessons, party lessons, prank lessons, or eldritch lessons?"

"A mix of all columns, really."

Jaune looked from one girl to the other, confused. "Who's master Pinkie?"

"Sayori's mentor in all things mystical," Monika replied. "She's a crazy cartoon horse. Hell of a baker too."

Pyrrha chuckled. "Alright, now I know you're just making things up-"

A beam of red was suddenly inches away from her face.

"Do not mock Darth Terror'Anment," Sayori said, her face and voice both stoic. "She who appears, Defiler of Sanity and Wellspring of Fun, is not one to be trifled with."

"Sayori..." Monika put a gentle hand on her wrist. "Would she want you to defend her like this?"

For a moment, the girl was silent. Then, with a snap and a hiss, the red beam vanished. "Sorry, you're right. I'm sorry, I... I have a great respect for master Pinkie, she came to me in a time of great need, and... well, I just don't like to hear her dismissed like that."

"I... see," Pyrrha managed hesitantly. "I suppose I can respect that."

She subtly repositioned herself to be between the girls and Jaune. Monika and Sayori did notice, but besides a shared mischievous look they deigned not to comment.

"Soooooo." Jaune cleared his throat. "Relics."

"Right, the initiation quest. Still that way." Monika pointed. "Let's keep marching, people!"

Part 10

The disparate quartets reunited at the ruined temple to find the future team RWBY playing a game of jacks. Or possibly ten games, simultaneously. There was clearly some houseruling going on.

"Queens before kings!" declared Ruby, angling the tiny rubber ball as she threw it down.

"No semblance," Weiss reminded her casually, leaning aside as the ball bounced against a wall. Blake stretched out her arms momentarily, letting the ball pass between her and the book she was reading, before going back to sitting against a column. Yang watched the ball rebound off one of the chess pieces, her eyes trailing it-and then she caught sight of the newcomers, primarily because the tiny rubber projectile bounced off Jaune's head.

"Oh hey, guys! Sorry, we got a little bored waiting for you all." Her head turned to look at Ruby, completely incidentally getting out of the ball's trajectory as it bounced against a ruined column. "Let's wrap it up, sis."

"Last round, I swear!"

Monika's eyes went wide when she saw the ball hurtling toward Sayori. Before she could do anything, though, the peach-haired girl calmly plucked it out of the air and dropped it on the ground with an evil smirk. "Ball's dropped."

"What?!" Ruby looked up, a betrayed expression on her face. "Sayori! How could you, I was so close!"

"I am a Sith you know. Mwahahahaha."

"Oh, right. You need to talk to Cinder then." Ruby glanced down at her hands. "Fifty-four out of a hundred... Whatever. I'll pick this all up."

"We've got our ponies," Yang said, shaking two golden chess knights. "You guys can grab whatever you want."

Monika looked over the remaining chess pieces on the columns. "...we should definitely go with something black. Shame the bishops are already taken."

"I'd rather go with one of the golden ones," Jaune protested.

"Hmm? Oh!" Monika smiled at him. "Yeah, sorry, I didn't mean you. See, those of us Dokishiori agreed we'd be on a team together. Village survivors, you know how it is."

"Oh. Right."

"Hey, you and Pyrrha can join, uh..." Monika glanced over at the other quartet. "Pretty Kung Fu boy and his cute bruiser girlfriend!"

"Lie Ren and Nora Valkyrie," Yuri corrected offhandedly. "Monika, are you trying to make a team of UST?"

"Better to concentrate the same issue in one group."

Pyrrha pinched her brow with a sigh. "Are the four of you just going to be shipping forever?"

"Unrequited romance has factored into our tragedy deeply," Yuri explained simply. "We are compelled to examine it whenever it comes up, and end it whence we find."

"She's not wrong," Sayori admitted. "I mean, Hiroaka..."

The four visiting Loopers sighed in wistful tandem.

"Yeah. Welp, he's dead now," Natsuki pointed out casually. "What a way to go, though."

"Oh, yeah. 'I love you all, live for me,' then holds off a horde of Grimm by himself. Classic Shakespearean tragedy. I mean, hell, if we weren't all crushing on him before..." Monika took a moment to compose herself. "...Anyway, relics?"

Natsuki glanced at the options. "You know, I agree that black's our way, but if we're going for something thematic... Pawns, probably."

Sayori blinked. "Pawns?"

"Think about it: tiny harmless things that can upgrade into terrifying menace mid-to-late game."

"Huh." Sayori took a considering look at Monika. "Yeah, actually, that makes a lot of sense."

The brunette rolled her eyes. "Har de har har, what it is to laugh. Black pawns, then." She stepped forward, grabbing one while Natsuki took the other.

"...Well, I prefer a golden castle!" Nora declared, grabbing one of the white rooks. "I can be a queen!"

"And I guess I'll be a noble prince?" Jaune took the other one. "Wait, are you sure this will put me on the same team as-"

"Four-person teams, two of each piece in each color, every set of partners gets one relic," Monika rattled off.

"Right."

For a moment, the twelve of them stood there, staring at each other.

"...This feels anticlimactic," Ruby said eventually. "I mean, where is the huge Grimm threat?"

Sayori turned to her slowly, an evil smirk forming on her face. "So you want a challenge, eh?"

"Holy shit, SAYORI IS SMIRKING!" Natsuki whipped out a smartphone and fumbled with it for a bit. "Damn these paws, I need-"

"Got a pic," Yuri interjected with her own smartphone. "I'll text it to you later."

"I mean, yeah?" Ruby shrugged. "Like, not want want, it'd just be nice for this to actually feel like something I had to work for."

Sayori raised a hand and clenched it tightly. "Your wish is my command."

Monika groaned as the forest began to rustle. "Sayori, you're being oddly vindictive today, you know that?"

"I am a Sith!" Sayori chirped brightly, pulling out a grappling hook and her lightsaber. "Don't worry, this'll be fun!"

Then a wave of shadow and bone burst from the trees.

Part 11 (A Skaz Wolfman piece, yo)

A veritable horde of man-eating monstrosities erupted through the treeline. Beowolves, Ursi, Boarbatusks, Alpha Beowolves, Ursa Majors, and not one, or two, but three Deathstalkers came charging. A dense flock of Nevermores flew above them, with a Giant Nevermore flying high above the forest. Natsuki turned to Sayori, who was smiling at her handiwork. "When this is over, you owe me all the Pinkie cakes you have left in your Pocket," she deadpanned.

"Fair enough," Sayori replied glibly, already walking slowly forward to meet the enemy. Force Lightning crackled all over her body. She had her red lightsaber in her right hand, and in her left she was twirling what appeared to be a jump rope with a large meat hook tied on where one of the handles should have been. Clearly an improvised weapon.

"What the–where did all these Grimm come from?!" Jaune yelped.

"Sayori's Semblance is basically a massive dinner bell for the Creatures of Grimm," Monika explained as she pulled numerous bits and pieces out of the many pockets all over her pants and jacket. Each component started glowing a faint green and drifted out of her hands, and soon they were seemingly fitting themselves together. A moment later, she was jamming a magazine into a carbine rifle. "Sayori!" she called out, "Hang back a sec, we need to coordinate with ever–"

"No time for a group huddle, newbies! Sink or swim!" shouted Ruby with glee as she torpedoed into the horde. Grimm, or rather pieces of Grimm, started flying through the air in her wake. A moment later, Yang charged after her with Blake crouched on one of her shoulders. Weiss followed at a more composed pace, casually slinging elemental bolts off of Myrtenaster and into the horde.

"…alright then. Let's see…Sayori, clear the air. Yuri, watch out for the "kids"; I very much doubt this is Baseline for them. Natsuki, break their tenpins."

"Roger-roger," chirped Sayori as she immediately broke into a run and took a huge leap into the air. She hurled out her grappling hook, caught onto a Nevermore that was almost as big as a dog, and she yanked herself towards it.

Natsuki started screaming hot-bloodedly as she whipped out her hammer, morphed it into a chaingun, and unleashed bullet-hell on the oncoming Grimm, charging towards them as she fired.

Yuri saluted crisply, before going to stand next to not-yet-JNPR. Fortunately, they were busy talking amongst themselves and hadn't caught why Yuri was joining them. She placed a hand each on Ren and Nora's heads. "Fear not, precious ones. I shall be your dark protector," she solemnly vowed.

"Neat!" said Nora, "Now let's go wreck all the things!"

"Sure…" said Ren.

With that, Yuri, Nora, and Ren ran up to meet the enemy. Nora, of course, was leading the charge with gusto, while Ren was running up just behind her and close to her side, like a shadow. Yuri, despite seeming to run at a much more sedate pace, kept up with them easily.

As Nora ran, she raised her grenade launcher and started pumping out pipe-bombs that arced through the air, trailing pink smoke, before slamming down into the midst of the Grimm and sending black-and-white gibs flying. Likewise, Ren whipped out his guns and gave the encroaching horde both barrels. Yuri waited until just before Ren and Nora would have entered melee range, and then suddenly blurred forward and began her own assault. She popped out her wristblades and started doing the Human Blender.

Every Grimm within arms' reach of her was swiftly reduced to piles of dissolving chunks of bone-encrusted dark flesh. For a moment, Nora and Ren stopped firing and just stared in awe at her. Far more than her speed, her efficiency was astonishing; not a single movement was wasted, and it seemed as if every single muscle twitch in her body brought about the demise of at least one monster. Then the Grimm started moving around Yuri, and Nora shifted Magnhild to Hammer-Form as she and her lifelong companion were forced into melee action after all.

It wasn't more than an instant before Yuri had cut her way back to their side, and somehow she seemed to always be in position to eviscerate anything that got in Ren or Nora's blindspots. Besides her speed and economy of movement, it seemed her spatial awareness was off the charts as well. Ren silently suspected that the only way a person could dance around himself and Nora and through their enemies like that without making a misstep at the speed she was moving…would be if she were seeing everything around her in slow motion.

Up above, Sayori was jumping from one Nevermore to another, dispatching each one with her lightsaber and leaping to the next target even as it fell. At all times, her off-hand sent her grappling hook flying every which way with uncanny accuracy, snaring the flying Grimm and slamming them into each other. Not that anyone could tell by watching her, but as she hopped seemingly at random from target to target, and as her hook sailed through the air again and again, both were guided by the unseen hand of the Force.

Down below, Natsuki was smashing a path through the Grimm with her own warhammer, which didn't have as much reach as Magnhild but had a somewhat broader head. A faint, pink glow rippled over her body as her Semblance burned through all the candy she had eaten on the way through the forest to give all of her muscles a tremendous boost.

Seeing that her club members were carrying out their assignments with aplomb, Monika took a knee on the grass and raised her gun. To say that Rough Draft was, in its current form, a sniper rifle was a gross understatement of its power. It was more like an anti-materials rifle; a gun with enough penetrating force to deliver death to operators ensconced in heavily armored vehicles. In fact, and Monika was quite proud she had managed this without having to pull anything out of her Pocket, it wouldn't be inaccurate to describe the gun in her hands as a railgun. While the materials had all been acquired from within this loop, the design had been adapted from sniper rifle-type small arms mass accelerators she had handled in the Mass Effect Loop.

In other words, every shot Monika fired from her gun carried enough kinetic energy to punch through an entire column of Grimm, carving a trail of plasma through the air, with nearly every monster the bullet passed through being partially vaporized and blown apart by the impact force. Of course, such firepower would also punch just as easily through any of her friends, or the presently Unawake Loopers. Only Team RWBY, with their billions of loops, had enough Aura to shrug off a hypervelocity slug. Thus, Monika had to take the greatest of care when placing her shots.

Meanwhile, way over at the back of the horde, Team RWBY was having their fun. Weiss was more or less literally waltzing through the monsters, with every swing of Myrtenaster released a wave of elemental energy that left nothing but smoking Grimm carcasses in their wake. Blake and Yang appeared to have settled into an impromptu game of Volley-Grimm with some poor unlucky bastard of an Ursa. Ruby alone refrained from fighting, having instead perched herself on a tree branch and observing how the Literature Club Loopers were going about things. She was a little disappointed that they were all split-up instead of synergizing, but since Monika was directing them she supposed it still counted as teamwork.

Ruby found it particularly interesting that Monika had seen fit to assign one of her girls to essentially babysit a couple of Unawakes. 'Automatically assumes a sense of collateral responsibility,' Ruby noted, 'Good sign.' She turned her attention, and her scope, up to Sayori. 'Seems completely focused on what she's doing. Implicit trust in her leader. Weiss said she didn't sense any bad mojo between the girls, or at least no more than would be usual for a group of close friends. Buuut Sayori's also got empathic senses which could mean she's skilled at covering up that kind of thing. She really gives off a 'Crying Clown' vibe, sort of. I should talk to her about stuff sometime.' Ruby looked to Natsuki next. 'Okay, so she fights like someone who uses violence as an outlet for some serious personal issues. Wonder if Blake's already talked to her about that? Either way, she's obviously into the "cute little ass-kicker" shtick.' Finally, she looked to Yuri. 'She…might be the best fighter in the group. Have to see Monika go melee to be sure. She's pretty darn good, at least. She's already on Baseline-Pyrrha's level, I'm pretty sure.'

And back on the other side, Jaune Arc and Pyrrha Nikos watched the chaos unfold. "S-so, uh, what do you think we should do?" Jaune asked, "I mean, Weiss mentioned you're a good fighter. Any suggestions?"

"…well, truth be told, combat on this scale isn't something I have much experience with," Pyrrha admitted. "Sanctum covered mass-combat theory, of course, but I've never seen this many Grimm in one place. Frankly, I'm a bit out of my depth here." Despite what she said, she said it calmly.

"Crap!" yelped Monika, standing up. Her gun came apart in a cloud of glowing green components, some of which flew back into her pockets, and the rest reassembled in her hands as a pair of handguns. She started running towards the Grimm. "Yuri!" she called as she ran, "Natsuki needs support!"

Yuri broke away from Ren and Nora, and seemed break into a rapid sprint over top of the Grimm towards Natsuki, viscous black ichor spray out of the monsters that she dashed across. Consequentially, the Grimm started pressing in on the teenaged duo Yuri had left behind.

Without thinking, Jaune broke into a run towards them. "They need help!" he called back unnecessarily; Pyrrha was on his heels and already overtaking him, having taken off just a second after Jaune had. It wasn't lost on Pyrrha that for her clearly superior reflexes, Jaune had reacted just that little bit faster than she had. She smiled…and then remembered Monika and Sayori's nettling, and scowled.

Monika reached Ren and Nora first, and even before she reached them she opened fire with her pistols. They weren't automatics like StormFlower, but she dropped every Grimm she fired on with one or two headshots, very rarely missing. Once she was in melee, she dropped and slid under the tangle of Grimm Ren and Nora were trying to fend off, sprang back up to her feet and went into a frenzied Gun Kata, occasionally punctuated with flurries of kicks.

Pyrrha got there just a moment after Monika did and started thrusting and swiping at the Grimm with her spear. By the time Jaune caught up, the Grimm had thinned out enough that Monika moved on, and Pyrrha, Ren, and Nora had quickly dispatched what was left. They barely had a moment to catch their breath before the next wave reached them.

Up above, Sayori noticed their predicament as the Grimm surged around them. With a sigh, she jumped off of a Nevermore into the middle of the flock, dropping her weapons into her Pocket for a moment. She drew her arms in and threw them back out with a piercing scream as Sith Lightning exploded out of her body, arcing to the Nevermores closest to her and chaining through the rest of the flock. Within seconds the flock had been annihilated, all but the Giant, and Sayori started falling towards the earth. As she fell, she reactivated her Semblance. For an instant, all the Grimm below froze up before turning their heads skyward, seeming to completely forget about the other teenagers they had been engaged with. The Giant Nevermore abruptly stopped circling and dropped into a nosedive straight for Sayori.

The Grimm turned their backs on the others and started dogpiling each other, trying to get to the girl falling towards them, but the massive devil-bird beat them to it. It aimed to snap at her lower body with its beak, but before it could do so Sayori did an aileron roll to her right and Unpocketed her rope-hook, and threw it to snag the massive Grimm in its throat. She yanked herself onto the Giant Nevermore's neck and positioned herself just behind its head. She screamed as loud as she could, "SORRY FOR CHEATING, MONI!" and grabbed a handful of the Nevermore's flesh. She squeezed hard, and stabbed into the monster's mind with a sort of mental lance. 'You're not a wild monster anymore,' she thought firmly, in a mental tone of voice that allowed for no talkback. 'You're my bird, now. You are my weapon. There is no greater power than the Dark Side, and I am its master. I am your Master. I AM YOUR MASTER AND YOU. ARE. MY. DEATH-BIRDY!'

The Nevermore immediately broke under her will. It slammed down, talons-first, into the Grimm a decent pace away from everyone else. It folded its wings to its sides and stood up at attention. As an afterthought, Sayori added, 'And your name is now Becky. Bob your head twice if you understand me.'

Becky the Nevermore bobbed its head twice. 'Very good. Now then…'

"BECKY! LET'S SMASH!" Sayori yelled, whipping out her lightsaber and holding it aloft. Monika, Yuri, and Natsuki all facepalmed at the same time. As did Blake and Weiss, while Yang and Ruby cracked up laughing.

Becky spun around on the spot, its tail knocking down the Grimm that were trying to reach Sayori. Sayori switched off her Semblance, and took a huge flying leap away from her beast. She landed next to Jaune, Pyrrha, Ren and Nora. "Look alive, dearies, we've got work to do!" she said spritely. As she did so, in the background, Becky pecked at the ground three times in quick succession, taking out a large clump of Grimm. Then the Nevermore gave a mighty flap, bowling over a large swath of Grimm.

The four Unawake Loopers stared at her. Nora abruptly squeaked, "Teach me your ways, O Wise One!"

"No time for that now," said Sayori as she bisected a Beowolf, snared the upper-half with her hook and flailed it at an Ursa.

"How did you…" Pyrrha began, but couldn't seem to figure out the right words to phrase the question on her mind.

"It's just a god thing," Sayori said with a shrug.

"What?" Nora and Ren asked flatly.

"You guys wanna play Twenty-One Questions, or do you want to slay some monsters?" asked Sayori, who was working on cutting a path to her friends.

"She has a point," said Ren as he high-kicked a Beowolf that had lunged at Nora, dispatching it with a stab to the chest with one of his bladed guns.

Meanwhile, Monika, Yuri, and Natsuki were standing with their backs to each other. Yuri had her blades at the ready, Natsuki was panting as her sugar-rush of power was petering out, Monika had turned Rough Draft into something like a revolver-shotgun, and they were facing off against three Deathstalkers. "Well, if no one else is going to say it, I will," said Monika, "Girls…we appear to have been caught in a pincer maneuver."

"Damn it Monika is now really the time?" Natsuki growled.

"Natsuki's got a point, Monika," Yuri spoke up with an impish grin. "That really stung."

"Fuck off, Goth-Cow!" Natsuki snapped. Then she gave a scream and bullrushed at the nearest scorpionoid Grimm. She tumble-rolled between its pincers before springing up to whack the monster in what could arguably be called its chin. Pouring the last of her enhanced strength into that swing she managed to lift the Grimm up so that its underbelly was exposed. With an almost pained grunt of effort, she flipped her weapon around and opened fire, gutting the beast.

Yuri just ran right up and stabbed her Deathstalker in its ugly face with two blades of Fire Dust. She detached them from her wrists before backflipping away, popping a fresh pair of blades, and launching one of them at one of the blades she'd left embedded in the Deathstalker. The resulting fulmination left a gaping, gory crater where the monsters eyes and mandibles had been, and it collapsed on the spot. Then she ran over to Natsuki's side, just in time to behead a Beowolf sneaking up on the pinkette's six.

Monika loaded her gun with Fire Dust shells and opened fire on the Deathstalker facing her. Fire scoured its many eyes, enraging it, and the monster charged at her. When it thrust a pincer at her, she grabbed it and flipped herself on top of the forelimb, then jumped onto the cephalothorax, deflecting its stinger with a spinning kick in mid-air. She aimed Rough Draft down at the creature, but a sudden gust of wind blew her off of the Deathstalker, and then it got impaled by Becky's beak. The Giant Nevermore lifted its head, the Deathstalker still wriggling on its beak; Becky opened its beak to unleash a deafening battle-crow, tearing the other Grimm in half in the process.

"Sorry for the kill-steal, Mon-Mon," Sayori called a she rode up on a remarkably docile Boarbatusk that was the size of a horse. "Guess Becky was feeling peckish."

"Having fun playing Beast Master?" Monika asked with a grin as she reformed Rough Draft into a light machine gun and jumped up on the Boarbatusk, sitting behind Sayori.

"Mentally, these things are a lot like living nodes of Dark Side energy," Sayori observed. "I don't think they have souls, though, so little-to-nothing in terms of willpower. Just manic hunger for, quite specifically, human and Faunus flesh, and a strong attraction to negative emotions. In fact, I kind of feel cheated; I'm pretty sure I could draw these things to me without having to have a Semblance for it. Anyways, this is Edge-Hog. Edge-Hog, this is my friend Monika." Edge-Hog the Boarbatusk gave no sign of acknowledgement, it just kept rushing through its fellow Grimm while Monika and Sayori destroyed every monster around them.

"Edge-Hog?"

"Yeah, cuz it's an edgy hog monster, and I saw it doing the Sonic thing. The Spin-Dash," Sayori explained.

"Sayori, never let anyone tell you you're not a layered individual," said Monika as she reloaded her gun.

Sayori directed their mount to plow straight towards Yuri and Natsuki. Unfortunately, Natsuki's reflexes got the better of her, and before she noticed that her friends were riding the monster she caved in the side of its head. The abruptly dead Creature of Grimm plowed a short furrow into the ground, throwing Monika and Sayori over their friends. Luckily, Sayori had the presence of mind to kill her lightsaber before she could accidentally maim someone with it.

"Oh. Uh…sorry, Sayo," Natsuki nervously chuckled.

Sayori sighed as she and Monika helped each other up to their feet. "Nah, you're fine. My bad for using enemy monsters like that on the battlefield."

Looking around, the girls found that only a few Grimm were left. Despite clearly pulling their punches very heavily, Team RWBY had taken out a little more than half the horde by themselves. The quartet predestined to become Team JNPR were putting on a good show against a stray Alpha Beowolf. Becky was doing a fair job of mopping up. Only a thin spread of monsters were left in the area around the Literature Club Loopers.

"You wanna take five, Nat?" asked Monika, "You seem a bit winded and there honestly isn't much work left to do here."

"I'll be fine," Natsuki grunted, dropping Chekov's Gun into the sling on her back and somewhat awkwardly cracking the knuckles of her paws. "Think I'll go hand-to-hand for the rest of the fight, though. It's really weird handling that thing without thumbs."

"We should maybe do some reworking as soon as we have access to a forge," Yuri mused, "At least, I should hope a combat school of Beacon's renown would have a high-quality forge."

"Well, I think I've done enough damage for one day," Sayori said, self-satisfied as Becky the Nevermore chicken-walked over to her.

"I feel the same, actually. My shoulders are feeling a bit stiff, if I'm being honest," said Yuri.

"More for us, then~" said Monika as she and Natsuki took off for the nearest monsters.

Sayori walked up to Becky, laid a hand on one of its talons, and with a loud whoosh of displaced air the Giant Nevermore disappeared.

Yuri blinked. "Is that…wise? The Pocketing of living things is somewhat controversial, Sayori."

"I know," said Sayori, stretching her arms above her head. "But the alternatives are putting it down, which seems wasteful, or letting it run rampant again and go back to hunting down people, which would be worse. Besides, Grimm only get bigger and stronger the longer they live. I'm kind of curious to see how far that goes. Whatever negative consequences may come of me keeping Becky, I'll take them. Goes hand-in-hand with being a Sith, y'know?"

"Fair enough," said Yuri. She gave her friend a smile. "And if anyone gives you too much guff, I'll help you brainstorm revenge pranks."

"Thanks," said Sayori, smiling back at her friend. Then she frowned. "Hey, wanna help me brainstorm something right now?"

"Of course," said Yuri, whipping out a small, low table and her tea set.

"Well, I think I ought to name my Fire Dust baton," said Sayori as they sat down for a drink.

"Your what-now?" asked Yuri.

"How I'm going to explain my lightsaber to non-Loopers," said Sayori. "See, I noticed the rest of you have kind of set up a writing motif with your weapons' names. Rough Draft, Chekov's Gun, and Poetic Justice, right? And I remember Blake mentioning that naming weapons is almost universal on Remnant. So, yeah, my weapons need names. And my grappling rope is obvious: Plot Hook."

"Strong," said Yuri.

"Thank you. But my lightsaber is trickier," Sayori admitted.

"Well…Chekov's Gun is a trope, Rough Draft and Plot Hook are writing terms, and Poetic Justice is a figure of speech," Yuri observed, "So you can use any of those three things to keep with the theme." She took a thoughtful sip. "Maybe something that invokes Tragedies and Comedies?"

Sayori turned her eyes foreheadwards. "Hmm…tragedy, and comedy…" she muttered thoughtfully. Suddenly her eyes lit up and she snapped her fingers. "Eucatastrophe!"

"I'm a what?" asked Yuri, reeling back in her seat a bit. Then her brow furrowed. "No, wait…eucatastrophe? That's not a word you hear very often these days."

"Yeah, but it's a word that means something good has happened, but it's almost a word that means something bad has happened. And when you think about it, a catastrophe for one person is a eucatastrophe for their mortal enemies!"

Yuri blinked. "Sayori? Never let anyone tell you you're not a deep-thinking individual."

"Welp, all the Grimm are dead," said Ruby as she strolled up to the pair. "You girls ready for our Sorting Ceremony?"

"Sure!" said Sayori, jumping up to her feet. Then she ran over towards Monika and Natsuki, yelling, "Hey guys, Yuri helped me figure out a name for my weapon…"

Part 12

"Russell Thrush. Cardin Winchester. Dove Bronzewing. Sky Lark." The headmaster looked over the assembled boys. "The four of you retrieved the black bishop pieces. From this day forward, you will work together as Team CRDL, led by... Cardin Winchester!"

"Hooray team NPC," Yuri deadpanned. "Seriously, do these people become important later or-?"

"Nope, that basically sums them up," Yang agreed, clapping along with the crowd. "Racist bullies who spend a bit of time drowning Jaune in toxic masculinity through blackmail and then exist to get pummeled for training."

"Jaune Arc. Lie Ren. Pyrrha Nikos. Nora Valkyrie." Ozpin turned to the next crew. "The four of you retrieved the white rook pieces. From this day forward, you will work together as Team JNPR."

Nora shouted in glee and almost-almost-gave Ren a hug, but caught sight of the four Dokis smirking at her and transformed it into a friendly shoulder punch instead.

"WUSS!" Natsuki cried brightly.

"Lead by... Jaune Arc!"

"Huh?" Jaune blinked. "L-Led by-?"

Ozpin smiled cheerfully. "Congratulations, young man."

Pyrrha shoulder-bumped the young man, gasping when she accidentally knocked him to the ground. "Oh my, I'm sorry!"

"ALSO WUSS!" Natsuki declared cheerfully.

Ozpin gave her a look as the next team stepped onto the stage. "Blake Belladonna. Ruby Rose. Weiss Schnee. Yang Xiao Long. The four of you retrieved the white knight pieces. From this day forward, you will work together as Team RWBY."

A sly expression flitted across Blake's face. In one quick movement, she swept a leg out from under the blonde girl, caught her mid-fall, and planted a deep kiss on her surprised but entirely willing lips.

"NOT A WUSS!" Natsuki proclaimed gleefully.

"Definitely not," Sayori agreed, grinning.

"Place your bets!" Ruby shouted to the startled crowd, whipping out her scroll. "Ten seconds, twenty, how long will they be lip-locked?"

"Forty-five," Weiss offered casually.

"We got forty-five from the rich girl, anybody else wanna-?"

"FULL MINUTE!" Sayori shouted. "A FULL MINUTE!"

"Full minute, full minute from peach-hair, clock's already at twenty-five anyone wanna go, winner gets fifty lien from every better!"

A series of hands raised from the crowd, accompanied by eager shouts. Glynda stepped forward, but Ozpin held up a hand.

"That's a minute thirty, thirty minutes, a hundred seconds exact, OH sorry passed the thirty second mark, forty seconds, anybody want to risk forty seconds, TOO BAD we're at forty-five, sorry Weiss it's all downhill from here, we're at fifty seconds everyone, any more bets, anybody, anyone, fifty-five, you in the back, two minutes-!"

Blake and Yang finally broke apart with a gasp.

"SIXTY SECONDS EXACTLY! Peach-hair wins! All betters meet with me before the night is out, I'm Ruby Rose, leader of team RWBY-"

"I never said you were the team leader," Ozpin pointed out with an amused tone.

"I know, I read your cue card."

"I'm not holding a cue card."

Ruby cheerfully produced a small slip of paper. "That's because I stole it." She grinned mischievously at the laughter of the crowd.

"...Hmm. Well, as it so happens, I did choose you to be the team leader, but given your actions I might reconsider."

"You change your decision and I revolt," Weiss said, idly filing her nails.

"Same," Blake added, standing up and refluffing her hair.

"Yang makes three!" Yang finished with a smirk.

"Very well. Team RWBY, led by Ruby Rose, as given through popular appointment." Ozpin playfully narrowed his eyes. "Now get off my stage, you miscreants."

The four girls stepped off, waving happily at the cheering and whooping crowd. Ozpin held up his hands for quiet, before turning to the last group. "And finally... Monika Musil. Sayori Shimizu. Yuri Yamashita. Natsuki Nakajima. The four of you retrieved the black pawn pieces. From this day forward, you will work together as team MYNS-"

"I'm sorry, but I feel I must correct you."

The crowd murmured as Monika strode forward, taking the microphone from Ozpin.

"I know this is a little unconventional, but... the four of us came from the same village, and we all survived its destruction at the hands of the Grimm. We've become... quite close in our journey, close enough that we are almost-no, that we are a family. For that reason, I feel the need to make an announcement." She took a breath. "We will keep our old names, for the sake of paperwork, but... in respect to our home, and what it meant for us coming together, I would like to formally declare that from now on, team Mints is comprised of Monika, Sayori, Yuri, and Natsuki Shiori."

She bit her lip, looking over at the girls. "If... that's alright, that is."

"...Honestly..." Natsuki smiled. "Yeah. That's fine."

"I was expecting something like this a lot sooner," Yuri admitted.

"Oh my gosh!" Sayori pounced on Monika and, somehow, immediately shoved her into a hugpile with the other two. "THIS IS ONE OF THE HAPPIEST MOMENTS OF MY LIFE!"

Ozpin's smile, slowly, came back to his face. "...Very well. From this day forward, you will work together as team MYNS, led by... Monika Shiori." He glanced at Glynda. "It seems like we're going to have an interesting year..."