Still working on my dissertation, but if I don't take a break and do something for fun I'll go crazy, so here it is: another chapter of Kombat Chat!
"And in a related incident, the actor playing Cage punched the real Cage in the you-know-where," Syzoth said, describing the filming of Johnny Cage's latest project, Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, a hack job about Shao Khan's conquest of Earthrealm in another timeline. Cage was naturally staring as the film's depiction of Shao Khan.
"Ah, Cage," Reptile said softly chuckling, before adopting a bone chilling stare,. "It's truly terrifying to think how you can run such a classic catch phrase as 'You suck!'"
Reptile looked back at the audience, "Ok folks. On to something much less terrifying than Cage's acting. Let's bring out tonight's guest, the cannibalistic Kytinn traitor, D'vorah."
Cheers burst from the audience as a swarm of flies buzzed over to the guest chair before solidifying into the form of a humanoid woman.
"Greetings, this one's loyal humanoid fans!" D'vorah said.
"Yes, how does that feel, D'vorah?" Syzoth asked.
"How does what feel?"
"Your entire fanbase is comprised of vertebrates, yet you despise us?"
"'Us?"" D'vorah asked. "This one thought you despised mammals, Reptile?"
"Not really. Some of my best friends are mammals. I just think that at the end of the day, we Saurians have gotten the shorter end of the stick than our fellow vertebrates. But warm or cold-blooded, you despise anything with a spinal cord."
"True, but until I gain the hourglass vertebrates are in charge, mammals are in charge," she said emphasizing the second group to exclude Syzoth, Goro, Sheeva, Khameleon, Chameleon, and Onaga from the first.
"I won't be baited so easily, insect."
"Insects" Devorah corrected him. "Kytinn are hive organisms."
"Oh," Reptile said. "So that's how thousands of flies equal only one D'vorah." He paused and then remembered her last statement.
"And why do you think you can get the hourglass now that the new Elder Gods have defeated your boss, Kronika?"
"The mammals can have this timeline and are welcome to it. I just want to get to another, where the hourglass is yet unclaimed, for insects to rule."
That actually surprised Reptile.
"You actually don't want to control the multiverse?"
"You mistake this one for Shao Khan."
"But your appetite?"
"You mistake this one for the One Being."
"Come on now," Reptile said. "You eat your own larvae."
"True, but so do all Kytinn. There are so many of us it is necessary. Besides, our larvae only mature if they have a humanoid host."
"Isn't that what you tried to do to Shinnok?"
"Yes, and this one nearly succeeded, if not for those meddling children."
"I hear you. Cassie cost me my chance to become an Elder God."
"She is vermin," D'vorah said.
"Don't get her mom angry. She beat up Cthulhu." Syzoth paused and thought, "Speaking of which, why did Kronika hire you after what you tried to do to her son?"
"Oh please! If Kronika excluded everyone who tried to kill or manipulate Shinnok, she'd have no followers."
"Shinnok himself would have no followers."
"Everyone knows Quan Chi is the real ruler of the Netherrealm."
"I don't think Shinnok has caught on to that yet."
"Because he is a fool. You should thank this one for trying to implant larvae inside of him. After Scorpion killed Quan Chi, this one was the only check on Shinnok's stupidity."
"Yes, you did us all an immense service."
"Was letting insects rule too much of a price for stopping him from restoring the One Being?"
"Not when you put it like that, but you both ended up losing, which was better for the rest of us."
"Point taken," D'vorah said. Suddenly she realized something.
"You know, you and this one think a lot alike."
Reptile shrugged.
"Surprises me too. I guess it's just we're both non-mammalian Kombatants concerned with the wellbeing of our respective species in a multiverse controlled by mammals."
"This one will go further. We are non-mammals who will do anything to ensure our species' supremacy."
Syzoth chuckled. "Supremacy? Maybe in another timeline. In this one I'd just settle for Saurian survival."
"Weakling."
"Oh, come on!" Reptile moaned. "There are trillions of Kytinn and only three Zaterrans. Conquest is easier for you. Let us make sure there's a next generation of Zaterrans before we try to conquer anyone. In fact, give us a few generations to recover from all the inbreeding that's going to be necessary. It will take us time on the conquest front. You're ready to roll now."
"This one misjudged you. If there were only three Kytinn hive-individuals left, this one would adopt your strategy."
"We do think a lot alike, don't we?"
"Uncanny," D'vorah agreed.
"I still don't trust you," Syzoth said.
"Nor should you,"D'vorah said.
"You will do whatever is in your species' best interest, meaning your interest and those of your allies will not always align. Kotal still takes you being a double agent for Quan Chi personally. I can actually understand it. So, I don't trust you, but I do understand you."
D'vorah knitted her brow. "Speaking of Kotal, why are you so loyal to him? He is as much to blame as Cassie for your Elder God scheme not working."
"He spared my life once, gave me a good job, and still believes his decision was in everyone's best interest. I've got too much invested in our friendship to end it over one disagreement. I play the long game. Besides, I haven't talked to Jade yet. Possibly I can persuade her."
"Loyalty?"
"More carefully weighing my options. It's been a profitable friendship and I'm not going to throw away what I've gotten out of it just because I can't get everything. Speaking of which, you had pretty good job security with Kotal. Why did you risk it by working for Quan Chi?"
D'vorah chuckled.
"This one works for this oneself. Quan Chi's goals were a better fit for this one's own."
"So, from the beginning, it was all about feeding Shinnok to your larvae?"
"Exactly. The stronger a Kytinn larva's host, the stronger the adult Kytinn."
"That doesn't explain why you wanted Shinnok."
Everyone laughed at the fallen Elder God's expense.
"This one knew Shinnok wanted Earthrealm's Jinsei. He actually is strong when he feeds on that."
"Well, I suppose. On occasion. I mean, without it, Johnny Cage beat him up."
"Didn't Cage also beat you up?"
"The difference being I'm not an Elder God. Yet."
"Shinnok wasn't one anymore."
"Well, I've never pretended to be more powerful than Onaga."
"Point taken."
"Why did you never try to take Shao Khan as your host? I mean you were in Outworld all this time."
"Because unlike Shinnok, Shao Khan is not stupid."
"Tell that to Quan Chi when he got him to merge Outworld with Earthrealm."
"One error of judgment in tens of thousands of years. Shinnok keeps trusting Quan Chi over and over. Khan only trusted Shang Tsung like that when he had no option."
"He was still dumb enough to trust Quan Chi even once," Reptile said.
"To be fair, Quan Chi was right. Khan could invade Earthrealm. He only tried to merge it with Outworld after he thought he'd already won. His problem isn't stupidity. It's overconfidence. Shinnok genuinely cannot tell who his real friends are…or even if he has any."
"Probably goes back to his parent issues with Kronika and Norbert," Syzoth said, pausing for the audience to laugh at what was really a tragic statement.
"Speaking of family structures, what are Kytinn families like?" He asked D'vorah.
"Kytinn hive-individuals can reproduce without a mate because our component insects are not all the same gender."
"But don't all the insects in a hive-individual come from the same larva?"
D'vorah chuckled. "Foolish Saurian! Each larva is a hive that come from a single egg cell. But when the larvae are incubating in their host, one devours the other and assimilates some of their members. The Kytinn adult becomes whatever gender the majority of its individual insects are."
"So, in theory, one Kytinn could repopulate the whole species, should something ever wipe most of you out?"
"That is correct."
Syzoth shook his head in regret.
"Dang, I am envious!"
"Yes! This one is superior, isn't she?"
"We shall see, D'vorah. The timeline is not over yet."
"Kytinn have the advantage," she said.
"Advantages are only as good as how you use them," Reptile replied. "I'm an underdog with a tragic backstory, who has nevertheless used my mysterious origins and cool appearance to become a fan favorite over the years. By all accounts I should not be as popular as I am, but somehow I made it work."
"It amazing considering how popular you are given how pathetic and depressing you can be."
"It's amazing you are popular at all after killing off Mileena."
"This one was doing the realms a favor. Everyone hates Mileena."
"No. Her fellow kombatants and her subjects hate her. The fanbase loves her. Good thing for you that Kronika brought her back."
"The fanbase forgave this one. It was nothing personal. They got that."
"The fanbase never forgave Sindel for betraying her allies."
"That's because Sindel betrayed their expectations. This one has always fought for insectoid supremacy and eaten anyone who has gotten in her way. People know that about this one. People expect that from this one. That's why they love this one. This one never betrayed herself in their eyes. Sindel did."
"Fair distinction," Reptile admitted.
Syzoth could see his attempts to undermine D'vorah's confidence in her own poularity were ineffective. She was far too secure for that. So maybe a different approach?
"I was just wondering…you said Kytinn can reproduce without mates…how many parents did you have?"
"This one had two, but she never met her father. This one's mother ate him after he fertilized her eggs."
"Sounds dysfunctional," Reptile said.
"Not really. All weaker male Kytinn take that risk when they mate."
"It all makes sense now," Syzoth closed his eyes and nodded.
"What makes sense?"
"You impregnated yourself and had no idea if the resulting adult would be male or female after the larvae ate each other. And should you have a son, you didn't want him to be vulnerable like your father. So, you needed to incubate your larvae in a Jinsei-enhanced Shinnok."
"What makes you sure it would have been male?"
"I'm not. But neither were you, and that's the point."
"This one did not care if her offspring…"
"I'm not saying you had a preference. I said you didn't want to take chances. Remember what happened with Mommy and Daddy?"
"This one never knew her father! She has no parent issues!" She said rapidly at raised volume.
"Sure, you don't," Reptile said soothingly.
"Stop it, lizard. You are baiting this one. It won't work!"
"I'm just trying to understand you," still soothing. You and all your weaknesses.
"Continue and this one will bite your head off on interdimensional tv and add to her fanbase."
"My blood's acid," Syzoth said matter-of-factly. "I'll give you heartburn."
"Maybe I'll just run you through with one of my legs."
Reptile jumped out of his seat and became invisible while Tarkatan guards rushed to hold D'vorah in place. She disassembled herself into a swarm of flies and flew up one of the air vents.
Syzoth calmly uncloaked himself and took his seat back.
"Well, I found a chink in her exoskeleton. Ratings should be up after tonight's episode."
Reptile looked squarely into the center of his camera.
"Folks, I think we've learned something. Whether it's D'vorah, Mileena, Shao Khan, Sindel, Shinnok, or Raiden—villains have messed up home lives. All the power they seek is just to make themselves feel like less of a loser." Syzoth then realized how he could be misunderstood.
Clearing his throat and shaking his head, he said, "Now I don't want power, nor do I consider myself a villain. I just want my species to survive. Give me a happily ever after with Khameleon and a bunch of kids, and I'm satisfied. Come back tomorrow for a guest who will not be satisfied until they have all of spacetime. The one and only…. Time-Emperor Shang Tsung."