Disclaimer etc.: see Prologue.
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And hope you like!
Breath of Life
2 - Falling
Anger.
That was all he could feel. Blazing, searing anger, and the icy black of creeping madness.
DIZZY SPINNING CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP
The Doctor carried Rose back to the TARDIS, his expression unreadable, his body tense; a live wire. Her body felt light in his arms; too light. She should be heavier. This body wasn't right. It wasn't Rose.
But yet it was. And he couldn't change that.
LEAVE ME GET OUT SHUT UP SAVE ME
He laid her down just next to the main console, his damp fingers brushing across her cheek in a final goodbye. She was gone, but they would pay. He smiled, and the TARDIS's light unwittingly twisted it into a grinning leer of madness.
listen breathe ice cold metal on skin release calm make it go away
Sunlight beamed down on him as he stepped outside the door of the worn old police box. The bright and beautiful day was so foreign to his mood it was almost laughable. He stroked his hand down one of the blue panels of the ancient ship. "Look after Rose old girl."
His hand dropped and he turned away, ignoring the TARDIS's physic shudder of fear and revulsion.
What did she know? Nothing.
CAN'T MUSN'T NOT ALLOWED TOO HOT DIZZY STOP SCREAMING AT ME
He stood outside the gates to Isatai's temple, looking up through narrowed eyes. With a creak the doors were swung open, and a familiar face looked through. "Doctor," Malchize greeted. "I trust you are well." He caught the Doctor's expression, and sighed. "You should be happy for her. She has gone to the goddess." He smiled a sickly smile. "It is a great honour. You should be happy."
You killed Rose. My love. And you think I'm happy!
Before the monk could utter more blasphemies the Doctor's hand lashed out, fastening around Malchize's throat. His dark eyes lit up with what could only be described as pleasure as the monk's fingers scrabbled at his hand, but he was immovable in his rage.
Anger, or Madness.
What's the difference?
rose red rose thorns blood rose SELFISH YOUR FAULT SCREW UP WORTHLESS
He left a trail of death behind him. Malchize was only the first of many. He was cleansing this world, making it pure. He was an avenging angel, lonely once more.
curl up leave shaking aching stop it please stop too hot icy cold metal water cool iron bars
This was right. Of course it was right. How could it be wrong? They had killed so many, killed so many who had families, who were loved, and now it was time that they felt that pain in return.
chilling breeze on bare skin alone forever always alone cold empty laughing moon jeering stars
He was the Doctor. One time he had cured, one time he had been whole. Now he was broken. He had cured, now he killed. Survival of the fittest. Survival of the just. Survival of the right.
Survival of the Doctor.
GO AWAY LEAVE ME NO STOP IT ENOUGH HELP ME FALLING VANISHING HELP
He didn't need anyone. He was perfect by himself. In perfect balance, everything perfect.
After all, what is more perfect than death?
thoughts gone there gone swirling mess sharp intake of breath searing pain glorious darkness don't sleep can't sleep won't go away
Blood. So much blood. The air smelt of it. It was everywhere.
It was utterly glorious.
i have the will no light hurting agony pain alone can't feel and can't stop feeling breathe just breathe heavy limbs leaden fingers
Drowning. He was drowning in it; in the intoxicating smell of blood and sweat and passion and fear and death. It was his everything.
Drowning. Drowning.
Clarity.
Oh God. "Rose!"
What was he? What was he doing?
"Stop! Now!"
Silence.
Too late.
the water the monsters the fog the endless torment alone forever choking blaring ice pain death kill me let me die make IT STOP silence clocks ticking alone ringing in my ears sleep forever and always awake no one can understand
Falling.
HEARTLESS COLD SELFISH WHY WERE YOU BORN YOU HAVE NO PURPOSE air crushing down falling
Falling forever. Can't stop. Never going to stop. Always falling, never stopping. Always oblivion.
no more stars or moon no lakes no water no light just sweet oblivion forever you are my oblivion you have me.
i have nothing.
Dizziness.
Falling.
Blackness.
>>>>>>>>>
The TARDIS felt the darkness approaching. She felt the Doctor's black rage, his anger, his pain, his fear. And she trembled at the thought of it. Minutes ago she had felt Rose slipping, and now the Doctor was falling after her, desperate to join her, desperate to end his existence, desperate to die. Desperate not to live without her.
But Rose had not fallen completely.
A tiny spark of golden light sustained her; a gift from the TARDIS, a gift from the Bad Wolf. That spark wove throughout her body, twisting into her tissues and organs and fluids, restoring, boosting, aiding, healing better than any nurse-cat-nun-things could ever attempt.
A yellow-gold aura traced over her body, threading across her flesh, casting her face in iridescent shine. The light seemed to twist the corners of her mouth in a bittersweet smile.
Black and gold, shimmering at the opposite ends of a slippery slope.
The gold reached for the black.
But the black couldn't feel her.
>>>>>>>>>