Disclaimer: I don't know about any of the legalities of resignation etc. So just bare with me -it's not that important. Also, I can't remember the exact order of attendings, residents etc. and I don't know where Neela would be by now, so again -bare with me.

A/N The stethoscope thing in this chapter is something I always notice. I don't know if you guys know what I mean, but I think it's highly cute! grins

Chapter 9 -Neela

"Who'd'ya think you're kiddin', He's the Earth and heaven to you, Try to keep it hidden, Honey, we can see right through you" - Disney's Hercules "I won't Say (I'm in love)

I couldn't believe it as I walked through the doors and headed to the locker room. I was back at County. Granted, it was only for a few weeks to help them out, but I was back. I'd called up my old hospital and told them I was resigning, and that I would take the rest of my leave instead of working my notice. I went to my old locker automatically before remembering that one wasn't mine any more and turning to my new one. It was weird how I had just fallen back into the routine of coming to the locker room and grabbing my lab coat. At my other hospital it had been policy that you were already wearing a lab coat when you came in.

I went out and went to the desk. Jerry grinned, "Welcome back Dr Rasgotra."

"Thanks Jerry. Who's the attending today?"

"Barnett."

"Oh," I said, trying not to smile. Of course I was glad Ray was on. We were friends... We'd spent a lot of time together in the last week (since I'd first asked Weaver about taking Pratt's position temporarily) either round at his, or going out. It had been fun, just like old times.

"Alright people, let's check out the board," Ray said, walking up to the desk with his usual grin. He gave me a special smile then turned to the med-students who had clustered into the reception area, "This is Dr Rasgotra by the way, she'll be taking Dr Pratt's place while he's at home with a beer. I mean of course healing his ankle. So, what do we have?"

I loved the way he was so at ease with the students. I remember when I'd been a student and had first arrived at County I'd been terrified. I would have loved someone like Ray to be there to help me through with a laugh. Of course he'd arrived at County after me, and was still in his rebel "this is just a day job" phase, so he'd been little more than useless. Now though, he was a fantastic doctor and a great teacher. He'd really grown-up. He'd obviously kept his humour though.

We got to work pretty quickly, and it was just as I remembered. Busy as hell, but fun and exciting too. The student's made me laugh with their odd questions and statements and I cringed a couple of times, realising that's how I must have seemed to everyone back then. Best of all was Ray though, he helped out on student's cases as well as sorting out his own patients quickly and efficiently. I didn't know how he did it, he'd always been quicker than me, but I'd put that down to him not being very thorough. Now I realised that he was thorough, he just managed to do it quicker than me. Perhaps he had something going with the woman in the chem labs, I mused to myself as I saw him dismiss a patient after less than half an hour, when I was still waiting on test results from a patient I'd seen an hour ago.

"You alright Neela?" He asked, slinging his arm round my shoulder, "How's your first day at County?"

I laughed, "Same as always. You're still the Dispo Doctor."

He grinned, "No-one's called me that in a while."

"Hey that's what I'm here for, embarrassing memories and reminiscing."

"Two GSWs coming in now," Jerry called over. Ray grabbed his stethoscope from a near-by gurney and put it round his neck, still holding onto both ends as he said; "We'd better scedaddle."

How could he make putting a stethoscope on so cute?

When the day was finally finished we decided to go to Ike's along with Sam, Jerry, and Chuni -all the old crowd- to celebrate me being back. It was Ray's idea, but it sounded like fun. He bought a round for everyone and brought it over to the table.

"Where'd you get the money for all this?" I asked.

"Never you mind," he replied with a wink.

"Welcome back to hell, Neela," Sam said, taking her drink.

I laughed, "Thanks for the encouragement, Sam!"

"So did you miss us?" She asked.

"Yeah, I really did. My old hospital was so... unfriendly. They never went out for drinks or anything."

"That's terrible," Jerry said, taking a long drink, "A work force needs to bond, as Weaver would say."

"Oh yeah, I'm sure Weaver would love us all getting drunk after a shift," Ray said.

"I'm really glad your back anyway, beats having some temp' none of us know," Sam said, "At least we know you are actually a doctor!"

"Thanks," I replied with a grin.

When we finally decided it would be a good idea to leave I walked to the El with Ray, "You want to come back to mine?" He asked.

"Oh, I don't know, it's pretty late, and I'm on earlies."

"I'm on in the afternoon... Look Neela, I've been thinking about this for a while but um..." he paused.

"What?"

"Oh... you know what it doesn't matter." He began to turn away, but I caught his sleeve.

"No come on, you can't leave me like that, what's up?"

"I was wondering if... maybe... you'd like to... move in again?" I barely got a chance to open my mouth before he added, "No, of course not, I'm sorry that was a stupid idea. I just thought that it might give you some space, I know how busy Abby and Luka are with Jasmyn, and since you'll be on different shifts she might keep you awake, and we always have fun and... but yeah it's stupid."

I knew it probably was a bad idea. I was too close to him as it was. Everything was happening again, but now it could hurt more. I couldn't help myself though. "You've got yourself a deal, Roomie."

He looked at me, shocked, "What?"

"I'd love to move back in."

He grinned, "That's great."

"I'll come round tomorrow with my stuff, after work."

"Ok... here's a key, Brett gave me his back yesterday." He pulled out a keyring with a lone key on it and handed it to me. Then he smiled again, "I can't believe we're going to be Roomies again."

"I know," I said, grinning stupidly. It was wrong, it was a bad idea, but it felt so ridiculously right.

The next night I let myself into my apartment. It was mine again. No, it was ours again. I knew I shouldn't be doing this, I shouldn't even still be in Chicago. I should be back at the house, packing everything up again, missing Michael. But I wasn't. I was such a bad person, but for once I just didn't care. I'd missed everyone here too much to worry about doing the right thing. For once I was doing something I wanted to do, not something I thought I should do. And it felt great. There was still that voice in my head, telling me to walk out the door, that I was taking this too far, I was going to fall too hard to get back up again, but I quashed it. It wasn't like I was doing everything I wanted to. There were some things I could never do. And yeah, most of them were with Ray.

I had just settled down to watch t.v, after unpacking my stuff -yes I was one of those people that unpacked straight away- when my cell phone rang. It was Michael. He'd called me at least two times every day since the night of Ray's gig, usually more. I hadn't answered yet though. But, I needed to talk to him, I needed to tell him...

"Hello?" I answered, warily.

"Neela," he sighed, as if relieved. "I thought... why haven't you been answering your phone?"

"I lost my charger," I lied.

"Oh... Well, I was a little worried about you."

"Why?"

"Neela the last time we talked was almost two weeks ago, and that was so... Neela, I miss you and I just want to talk to you. We need to sort this out, I don't want anything to come between us."

"I've taken a job at County," I said suddenly.

"What?"

"I've taken a job at County. Pratt broke his ankle and they needed someone to fill in."

"But... what about your other job?"

"I resigned."

"Oh..." he obviously didn't know what to say. I wasn't surprised, it was completely out of the blue for him. "How long are you going to be staying there then?"

"Six weeks."

"I see... do you think Abby would mind if I came and visited you?"

No, Abby won't mind -I might though, I thought, but instead I said; "Well, actually I'm not staying with Abby."

"You're not?"

"No, I moved back in with Ray. It's got more space and..." I trailed off. Because obviously I was living here because of the space.

"Oh." He sounded so defeated. Guilt washed over me. What was I doing? Michael was a great man, he did not deserve to be treated this way.

"So there'd definitely be enough room for you to come visit," I said, cheerily.

"Well then, I guess I'll have to," he said, "I'll see if I can get the next weekend but one off. Would that be ok?"

"Of course," I lied, "I can't wait to see you."

"I can't wait to see you either. We can have a proper talk, yeah?"

"Of course," I said again. "Bye Michael."

"Bye," he hung up.

It looked like I was having a visitor. I was sure Ray wouldn't mind, he had friend's over all the time after all, but I did mind. I felt like Chicago, County, everyone were mine. My friends, my places. But of course, that was silly, Michael had been here before me. Except, he hadn't been here -this place was mine. Ray was mine. Except of course, he wasn't. He was my friend, sure, but he wasn't mine. Not any more, I'd lost that chance years ago.

A/N This is a shorter chapter than the one's you're used to by now, with my lo-ong chapters. But, I hope it's good anyway and there will definitely be more soon! And I just re-read this, it's in a pretty different style to my other Neela chapter's isn't it? Hope it doesn't bother people, it's just the way it came out... with her talking to the "audience". Not sure why...

Oh and I'm really sorry you guys, but I'm afraid I'm going on holiday in a week. Which means, please don't kill me, I'm forced to update at least twice a day from now until around tuesday so I can get this finished before I go. I hope you don't mind that many updates? There might even have to be more some days... sorry. lol!