There's Only Now, There's Only Here Chapter 10: One Moment In Time, a rent fanfic

CHAPTER TEN
(chapter title – One Moment In Time)

The next day, Roger's day off, was filled with phone calls, visits to the morgue, meetings with ministers, flower arrangers, Mark's family and tombstone carvers. By the end of the day, Roger was exhausted and ready to go to sleep, when the phone rang. Muttering curses under his breath, he walked over to the phone. Musetta had had three accidents while Roger was on the phone, so he was pissed about that.

"What?" he yelled into the receiver.

"Dad? It's three fifteen. Where are you?" Sara's voice came from the other line. Three fifteen was when the girls got out of school. Shit fuck damn Roger thought to himself.

"I'll be right there, honey. Give me fifteen minutes." Roger told her.

"Okay. Bye." Sara hung up as soon as Roger did. Muttering more curses, he grabbed his leather jacket and keys. Scribbling a quick note for Christopher, he headed out the door and to Fairview Elementary.

Reaching the elementary school exactly fifteen minutes later, he saw Sara sitting on a bench – Jennifer nowhere in sight. Sara wasn't alone – she was talking to a boy in a wheelchair.

"Sara! Let's go!" Roger called. Sara looked up and said a quick goodbye to the boy in the wheelchair and cantered up to the car.

"Hi cupcake. How was school?" Roger asked, pulling away from the school.

"It was good. Jennifer ran away during fifth period." Sara told him, looking out the window. Roger slammed on the brakes.

"Where did she go?" Roger asked.

"I don't know. She just told me that she was going out and that she didn't want to come back." Sara said, rubbing the end of her nose. It had smashed into the window when Roger had slammed on the brakes.

"Shit." Roger muttered. This wasn't helping his mood – or his day, for that matter. Putting the car in park, he got out of the car and shouted for Jennifer. Sara was getting scared – she didn't know where her best friend had gone. The tune of Musetta's Waltzcame from Roger's cell phone. Looking at the number, Sara flipped the phone open and pressed 'talk'.

"Hello?" she asked, uncertain of who was calling.

"Is this Sara Davis?" Maureen's voice came from the other line.

"Yeah! Hi aunt Maureen! Jennifer ran away from school." She then proceeded to tell Maureen exactly what was going on.

"I know, sweetie. Jennifer's right here with Tiffany and I. Tell your dad she's fine." Maureen told her.

"Okay." Putting the phone down on the dashboard, she rolled down her window.

"DADDY!" she called. Roger came running back over.

"Yeah?"

"Jennifer's with aunt Maureen and Tiffany." Sara told him.

"Is she safe?"

"Yeah."

"Let me talk with Maureen." Roger got back in the car. At that moment, Sara handed the phone over to Roger. He and Maureen talked for what seemed like an eternity. Sara got out her Pirates of the Caribbean folder and started to work on her homework until Roger got off the phone. She was in the middle of answering a math problem when Roger hung up.

"What's going on with Jennifer, dad?" Sara asked, putting her homework away.

"She just needs some time to herself, so she's going to stay with Maureen and Tiffany tonight. You'll see her tomorrow." Roger told her.

"Where's aunt Joanne?" Sara wanted to know.

"She's in Michigan for a lawyer's conference." Roger said, pulling out of the school parking lot. Sara turned on the radio to the oldies station. The song, One Moment In Time, was playing. Tears came to Sara's eyes – that had been Mark's favorite song.

"Each day I live
I want to be
A day to give
The best of me
I'm only one
But not alone
My finest day
Is yet unknown"

"Daddy?" Sara asked, turning down the volume.

"What?"

"Is Dad in a happier place now than he was when he was with us?"

"Yeah – he's with mom, his wife Katie, Angel and Collins up in heaven, watching over us, protecting us."

"Oh." Sara turned the volume back up.

"I broke my heart

Fought every gain
To taste the sweet
I face the pain
I rise and fall
Yet through it all
This much remains

I want one moment in time
When I'm more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams are a heartbeat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I'm racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will feel
I will feel eternity"

"Daddy?"

"What?"

"Who did you love more – mom or Dad?"

"I loved them both the same, Sar. You know that."

"I know."

"Why'd you ask that, then?"

"I dunno."

"I've lived to be
The very best
I want it all
No time for less
I've laid the plans
Now lay the chance
Here in my hands"

"Daddy?"

"Yes, sweetie?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too, peanut."

"I'm glad."

"Me, too."

"Give me one moment in time
When I'm more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams are a heartbeat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I'm racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will feel
I will feel eternity

You're a winner for a lifetime
If you seize that one moment in time
Make it shine"

"Daddy?"

"What?"

"Are you mad at me?"

"Of course not. I've just had a long day and I need to relax. Make sure to take Musetta out and take your AZT when we get home, okay?"

"Okay, daddy."

"That's my girl."

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That night was the hardest for Roger. He had always had someone by his side to keep him safe – no matter if it had been April, Mimi or Mark – he longed for someone.

Getting out of bed, he walked to Sara's room and stood in her doorway. He walked into the room and watched her sleep – the way that she was curled up in a ball, hugging her teddy bear and stuffed doll close to her as if she would never let them go. He sat down on the side of her bed, the mattress creaking under his weight. Carefully and quietly, he laid down next to his daughter, holding her in his arms. He remembered back to when she had been one years old…

"Daddy!" one-year-old Sara called from the nursery. Roger got out of bed and walked to her the nursery – the nursery that once had been Collins' old room.

"What is it, pumpkin?" Roger asked sleepily.

"I had bad dweam." She told him. Roger smiled and lifted her into his arms. He carried her to the kitchen and looked around for some milk for her to drink. Setting her down on the couch, he poured a glass of milk for her and got out a box of Oreos.

"What that?" Sara inquired, her green eyes getting wide as Roger sat down next to her.

"These are Oreos." Roger simply told her, breaking an Oreo apart and eating the creamy center. Sara watched him intently. Roger laughed and ruffled her hair, putting an Oreo on her plate.

"Roger Davis! What the heck are you doing?" Katie, Mark's wife, asked. Flinging her long brown hair over her shoulder, she walked over to where Roger and Sara were seated and smiled.

"Eating Oreos again? Shame on you." She teased, taking an Oreo for herself and smiled.

"Mark snoring again?" Roger asked. Katie nodded and coughed – her allergies were really bad, especially in the middle of April. Roger stood up and got Katie some water. She smiled and drank the water, popping two allergy pills into her mouth.

"Why's Sara up?" Katie asked, scooping her into her arms.

"She had bad dweam – I mean she had a bad dream." Roger told her, not bothering to stifle a yawn. Katie smiled and rolled her eyes.

"She sure is a cutie." Katie told him, handing Sara back to him.

"Thanks." The rocker thanked the sign language interpreter.

"Well, I better get going back to sleep. I have work tomorrow – the joys of signing." Katie laughed, said goodnight to both Roger and Sara and headed back to the room she shared with Mark. Roger held Sara in his arms, helping her with an Oreo.

"Okay, missy. Let's go back to bed." Roger told his daughter. Looking at her in his arms, she was fast asleep. Kissing her forehead, he carried her back to the nursery. Tucking her in, he watched her sleep for a moment before heading to his room. Yawning, he was out like a light by the time his head hit the pillow.

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Sunlight streamed in through the large window the next morning. Roger opened his eyes to see that he somehow had ended up in Sara's room. Taking a minute to wake up, he looked over at Sara. Her head was resting on his chest, the blanket in a twisted mess around her. He kissed her forehead before carefully getting out of bed. Adjusting his large pajama bottoms, he headed out into the kitchen and saw Christopher standing in front of the small oven.

"Hey." Roger greeted him.

"Hi." Christopher said back.

"Can I help with anything?" Roger asked. Christopher shook his head.

"I got the message about you and getting into the fight. What was that about?"

"You wouldn't understand."

"I'm sure I would if you told me."

"That's what they all say." Christopher muttered darkly under his breath. A confused expression came across Roger's face, but he shook his head. Looking over at what Christopher was doing, he helped him make omelets, two types of pancakes, bacon and sausage. The two of them talked as they waited for Sara to get up.

"I have to run some errands. Want to come?" Roger asked.

"I actually have a paper to write, otherwise I would." Christopher told him, finishing off his second pancake.

"Something smells good." Sara noted a few minutes later.

"Come and join us, jellybean." Roger told her, patting the spot next to him on the couch. She smiled slightly and walked over to him just as Christopher put a plate of pancakes in front of her.

"Thanks." Sara thanked him, taking a small bite of a pancake.

"I have some errands to run. Do you want to come with me or stay here with Christopher?" Roger asked.

"I'll come with you, daddy." Sara answered.

"Okay, we'll go after breakfast." He kissed her cheek and turned his attention to Christopher. "Make sure you take Musetta out, okay?"

"I will." Christopher told him, looking at the sleeping puppy. She was curled up in a ball, fast asleep.

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Twenty minutes later, Sara was ready to go. Today, she was wearing a plain green T-shirt and jeans. On her feet, she wore a pair of her mom's old tennis shoes. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail, held back with a thin piece of green ribbon. As she waited for her dad, she turned on the TV and watched an episode of her favorite TV show, Kim Possible.

"Hey sweetie." Roger greeted her, coming out of his room.

"Can I bring my CDs with me?" Sara asked.

"Of course you can, honey." Roger told her, trying not to cry.

"What are we doing today?" Sara wanted to know, turning off the TV.

"Well, I need to go to the morgue, the cemetery, the Food Emporium and a bunch of other places. I also need to swing by the recording studio and talk with Kaitlin about something. Sound good?"

"Yeah." Sara smiled at him and went to get her CDs from her room. Roger smiled and waited for her so that they could get going.

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"So, what CD shall we listen to first?" Roger asked as soon as he and Sara were settled in the car.

"Lion King, please daddy." Sara told him, getting the Lion King CD out of its place in her CD carrier and put it in the CD player. As the first track played, the two of them pulled out of Roger's usual parking spot and headed to the morgue, singing at the top of their lungs.

They reached the morgue fifteen minutes later. Roger was nervous about going to the morgue – he hadn't been to one since his sister, Lizzy, died. They were meeting with a man named Henry and this 'Henry' was supposed to take them to the room where Mark was being kept.

"Hi! You must be Roger. I'm Henry." A kind voice sounded as Roger and Sara stepped out of the car. A large white man who looked to be about fifty came out of the shadows and came to greet them. He was wearing a gray sweatshirt and jeans.

"Yeah, I am. This is my daughter, Sara. Sara, this is Henry." Roger introduced the two of them.

"Well, aren't you something? You're beautiful." Henry told her as he shook her hand. Sara smiled and walked with her dad and Henry to the morgue.

"So, Sara. Have you ever been to a morgue before?" Henry asked. Sara shook her head, keeping a death-like grip on Roger's hand.

"It's okay. What I'm gonna do, sweetie, is talk to your dad about something. My wife, Brenda, will show you around, is that okay?" Henry asked. Sara nodded and eased her grip on Roger's hand.

As they walked to the morgue, Roger kissed the top of Sara's head and told her she was going to get something special for being so good. Sara smiled at the idea.

"This is my wife, Brenda. Brenda, this is Roger Davis and his adorable daughter, Sara." Henry introduced Roger and Sara to a woman with strawberry blond hair and hazel eyes. She was wearing a red sweater and a blue knee-length denim skirt. On her feet, she wore calf-high black lace-up boots.

"It's nice to meet both of you." Brenda told them, shaking Roger's hand and then Sara's.

"Bren, I have to talk with Roger about something, so I was thinking that you could take Sara to see Mark." Henry told his wife. Brenda nodded and took Sara's hand in hers.

"So, honey, what grade are you in?" Brenda asked as they walked.

"Fourth." Sara told her.

"What's your favorite subject?" Brenda inquired.

"Choir." Sara answered.

"Do you like to sing?"

"Yeah – my dad and I play the guitar."

"Do you have your own guitar?"

"Yeah – it's my dad's old Fender."

"What else do you like to do?"

"Read, ride horses and go to movies."

"Do you have your own horse?"

"No – but I'm riding a pure black Arabian gelding named Zorro."

"Do you like to ride him?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, sweetie. This is where Mark is being kept. It might be a little scary to see him at first, but it's okay. If you get scared, you can just squeeze my hand, sound good?"

"Yeah."

"Ready?"

"Mmhmm."

Brenda walked to a metal table and signaled for Sara to follow her. Sara was hesitant at first, but she eventually walked over to where Brenda was. Brenda then unzipped the sheet that was covering the table. Sara watched her intently – curious as to what was underneath. There was Mark's still figure – his glasses had been removed and he had a huge pink spot just above his right eyebrow. He was paler than ever, which scared Sara a bit. Sara felt her stomach go to her throat.

"D-dad?" Sara said, scared.

"I thought Roger was your dad?" Brenda told her, confused.

"He is, but Dad was Daddy's partner." Sara explained.

"Oh."

"He and I were very close – he used to take me out filming. His daughter, Jennifer, is my best friend."

"You're really lucky to have been loved by him." Brenda told her, putting the sheet back on Mark's face and zipped it up. She then slid the table that Mark was on back into place.

"Let's go back to your dad and Henry, okay?" Brenda suggested, taking Sara's hand in hers.

"Okay." Sara smiled up at the other woman as the two of them walked back to the waiting room where Henry and Roger were.

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"There's my girl." Roger said as Brenda and Sara entered the room. Sara ran to him and hugged him around the waist. Henry smiled at the pair before shaking Roger's hand and thanking him for coming. Roger smiled and shook Henry's hand.

"Bye!" Roger and Sara headed out of the morgue and back out to the car.

"What'd you think of the morgue, sweetie?" Roger asked, turning on the ignition and put the car in 'drive'.

"It was okay." Sara told him, closing her eyes. She seriously felt like she was going to puke.

"You all right, honey? You don't look so good." Roger noted, getting out some medicine from the glove compartment and handed the bottle to Sara.

"Take two right now and we can get you something else when we get home, okay?" Roger told her. Sara nodded and popped two pills into her mouth and swallowed them dry.

After a quick stop at both the cemetery and the Food Emporium, they were on their way to the recording studio. Sara was curled up in a ball, fast asleep – Roger's leather jacket covering her. They were now listening to West Side Story – Sara's favorite musical of all time.

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Pulling into the recording studio parking lot, Roger leaned over and kissed Sara's forehead before heading into the studio. He left the car running with the windows down, hoping that the cool breeze would somehow soothe Sara.

"Hey Kaitlin." Roger greeted her as he stepped into the recording room.

"Rog, I'm so sorry to hear about Mark. Is there anything I can do?" Kaitlin asked. Roger shook his head and flipped through the papers in front of him.

"What are you looking for?" Kaitlin inquired.

"I had a piece of notebook paper with a song written on it."

"Oh, that helps a lot." Kaitlin told him, her tone sarcastic. Roger rolled his eyes and continued to look around the studio until he found what he was looking for – a piece of notebook paper folded into fourths with the words 'Mark's Song' written on it. Smiling, he put the paper in his pocket and headed out of the studio. As he walked back to the car, he saw Sara fast asleep in the front seat. He smiled at her and walked around to the driver's side and put the car in 'drive' and drove back to the loft. He turned off the music and focused on driving.

They reached the loft ten minutes later to find Joanne's car parked not too far away from where Roger usually parked. He put the car in 'park', turned off the ignition, gathered Sara in his arms and climbed the three flights of stairs to the loft, eagerly waiting what Joanne and Maureen wanted.

A/N: don't own the lyrics to One Moment In Time. belongs to respected owner. 'nuff said.