Of Those Deceived By The Rat
Title: The Beginning of A Beautiful Relationship
Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101
Pairing: Haru/Kyou
Word Count: 400
Rating: R
Genre: Humor/Romance (it seems they all are…)
Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.
Notes: I give all the credit for this to Ron White.
Kyou lay on the couch half asleep. It was raining hard outside and it had sapped all of his energy. So much so, that he had slept through his alarm clock and had not woken up for school. He therefore skipped.
The Cat-cursed was awake when three o'clock rolled around. He knew that the others would be home soon, so he tried to get a few more minutes of sleep.
When Kyou opened his eyes, he was face-to-face with Hatsuharu who sat on the floor staring at him. The Ox-cursed had obviously been watching him sleep.
"What the hell are you doing?" Kyou asked sleepily, but with hints of irritation in his voice.
"Waiting for you to wake up." was the simple response.
"Why?"
"I want to go do something."
"Go by yourself." Kyou turned to face the back of the couch away from Haru.
"Why don't you want to go?"
"Why do you want to go?" The older boy was starting to lose his patience.
"I want to go out with you."
Kyou flipped back to his original position. "You mean like a date?"
"Yeah."
"What about your precious Yuki? I thought you liked him."
"Well, I don't." Haru reached up and whispered seductively in Kyou's ear. "I like you now."
There was moment of awkward silence.
"So…?" While he was waiting for an answer, Haru's expression remained completely indifferent.
"No." The read-head once again turned his back to his cousin.
"Why?"
"Because I'm not gay, you stupid Cow!"
"Oh, my dear Kitty, everyone's gay. But the question is to what degree?"
"I am NOT gay, damn it!" Kyou sat up and pounded his fist on the couch's armrest.
"Alright then, answer me this. Do you watch porn?"
"…yes…"
"And do you watch girl-on-girl?"
"No…just heterosexual." The cat-cursed was starting to wonder where Haru was going with this.
"The do you like it when the guy has a small penis?"
"No. I like a big, hard, throb-" Kyou stopped mid-sentence and Hatsuharu smirked.
"I rest my case." Haru patted his cousin on the back. "Sorry you had to find out this way…"
Kyou was in utter shock. He couldn't believe that he had just said such a thing. He was completely speechless.
"I'll give you a moment alone." Haru stood and headed for the door. Just before he exited, Kyou spoke up.
"Hey Haru?"
"Hm?"
"Dinner or a movie?"
(A/N) This is one of my personal favorites so far. I must say, Ron White is a genius. Anyways, this will be the last update for at least a week. I have a bunch of finals coming up and I'm not doing exactly great in most of my classes. But have no fear! I will be back once summer vacation commences! Feedback and requests are much appreciated!