Disclaimer: I don't own the Dukes of Hazzard, making no money, just cheap thrills.

Warning: Angst

Rating: FRT

If You Love Something Set It Free

Chapter 10

It was the sound that woke him. Instantly awake, Luke listened closely, afraid that she had escaped. "No, 'm sorry...please..." he heard his cousin softly speaking. Realizing that the only danger was in Bo's dream, he moved towards Bo's bed.

"Bo, wake up...you're safe Bo." Luke called to his cousin, shaking his arm and hoping to wake him from the nightmare.

Blue eyes met blue, one set filled with fear the other with concern, a moment later Bo came fully awake. Recognizing the bedroom he shared with Luke, and seeing his older cousin sitting beside him, Bo knew he was safe. "Sorry, didn't mean to wake ya."

"It's okay Bo,"Luke assured him, reaching out to brush the hair out of Bo's eyes. "Not your fault you're having nightmares. You okay now?" When Bo only nodded his response, Luke's concern grew, "Ya know if you need to talk, I'm here...I want to help you Bo, if you'll let me."

"I know Luke, and I appreciate it,...just not sure I'm ready yet."

"I guess I understand that, I can't begin to imagine what you feel like, but just remember Bo, when you're ready I'll be here." Luke told him once more, before giving his shoulder a supportive squeeze and heading back to his own bed. He lay awake for more than an hour, waiting for Bo to fall back asleep, and hoping Bo would let him help him to heal.

For the next several days life gradually returned to normal, though none of them could help noticing the way Bo's eyes were always moving. Even when he was speaking to one of them, his eyes would constantly move around the area, watching for her, as though he expected to see her coming for him again. It broke their hearts that all they could do was pray and watch while Bo tried to move on with his life.

Watching his nephew, Jesse hated the fear he saw in Bo's eyes, though Bo did his best to hide it. He wished he knew how to help him, but the only thing he could offer was prayer and a shoulder to lean on. He hoped that the trial would help his nephew to heal; if he made it through testifying against Kathy Sue.

"Just leave me alone Luke!" The sudden shout brought Jesse out of his thoughts, just in time to see Bo take off for the woods, probably headed for the creek. Seeing Luke about to take off after him, Jesse stopped him with a hand on his arm and a quick word. Walking away from Luke, Jesse slowly made his way down to the creek, giving Bo a chance to pull himself together. He watched Bo for a few minutes, as he stood there skimming stones across the water, lost in thought. Jesse knew this was almost a ritual for Bo, whenever he had a fight with one of his cousins, or a problem too big to handle on his own, he could be found here. Skimming stones and thinking about whatever had brought him here, until Jesse or Luke would tire of watching him and get him talking.

Stepping out of the trees, Jesse wasn't surprised when Bo stopped skimming stones and turned to him. He always had seemed to know whenever one of them was there. "You want to talk about it Bo?"

"Not really, but I guess I ought to. Probably ought to apologize to Luke too." Bo replied in a soft, tired voice.

"Well now I can't tell you to apologize, could be Luke's the one who should be apologizing. Why don't you tell me what happened, maybe together we can figure it out," Jesse suggested.

"Nah, I was out of line, Luke's just trying to help is all. Uncle Jesse, when am I gonna stop being so scared?" Bo asked, sounding for all the world like a lost little boy.

Jesse didn't say anything at first, deciding to take a moment and pray for guidance before he spoke. "I wish I could answer that for you Bo. Heck, I'd give anything if I could just make your fears go away, but no matter how much I want to, I can't do it. You're the only one who can do that sprout, I do think that a lot of those fears will start going away once the trial's over with." Seeing Bo hunch forward, looking defeated and lost, Jesse hoped God would give the boy the strength he would need. "So you gonna tell me about it?"

"Luke was trying to get me to talk about it...I know he's just trying to help Uncle Jesse but it's hard to talk about. I'm not even sure how I feel, how am I supposed to tell Luke or anybody else about it? ...And he don't understand anyway, he thinks I should be wanting to send her to prison, guess he's probably right about that. What's wrong with me Uncle Jesse? I hate all of the things she did to me, but the thought of telling the judge and sending her away to be locked up..." Bo trailed off, unsure how to continue.

"There ain't nothing wrong with you Bo. The way I see it, how you're feeling is natural, yeah she did a lot of really bad things to ya. Hurt you in ways that me and your cousins won't ever really understand, but for a while you loved her and that's the part of you that doesn't want to see her locked up. Nothing wrong with feeling that way boy, but I don't suppose Luke sees it that way does he?" Bo looked at him in surprise, but didn't answer other than to shake his head. "That what happened, you tried to tell him about not wanting to lock her up and he...?"

"He called me a dang fool, asked me if I thought I deserved what she did to me. He was pretty mad about it, not that I blame him any, it don't make much sense to me, so how could it to him? So he said...he said that if I didn't testify against her, not to expect him to stand by and watch her kill me." Jumping to his feet, Bo walked a few feet away from Jesse, before turning to face him again. "Uncle Jesse I never said I wasn't gonna testify, just don't want to. How am I gonna make Luke understand that?"

"Why don't you let me talk to Luke? I don't think either one of you can stay calm enough to talk to each other right now," Uncle Jesse suggested.

"You're probably right Uncle Jesse,...I'd sure appreciate it," the pure gratitude in his voice, causing an ache in Jesse's heart.

Leaving Bo at the creek, Jesse headed back to the house to find Luke. Coming back into the yard, he wasn't really surprised to see Luke hurrying towards him, the worry plain to see. "Bo's fine Luke, he just needs some time alone. Why don't you come on over here and we'll have a talk," Jesse said, taking Luke by the arm and leading him towards the picnic table.

"Uncle Jesse are you sure Bo's gonna be okay? I'm sorry I upset him I didn't mean to, ya got to believe me," Luke told him while they headed to the table.

"I know ya didn't mean to Luke, and Bo knows that too. You're just worried is all, he understands that,...but Luke, son, ya got to try and see this from Bo's point of view. He's gonna testify against that girl, but that don't mean he wants to. He loved her boy, for a while and it hurts him to think of what she done to him and there's a part of him doesn't want to see her locked up. Now hush up, I'm not done. He knows that she needs to be locked away where she can't hurt him or nobody else, but that part of him that loved her makes it real hard to do. You getting mad at him and saying things like what you did ain't helping none, and I know you want to help. I'm thinking that's why ya got so dang mad in the first place, ain't it?" When Luke wouldn't even look at him, Jesse knew he was getting through to him, that boy never did like facing his own shortcomings. "You never have been able to stand seeing someone you love hurting and being helpless to do anything for them. That there's not really a bad thing Luke, but you can't be taking that frustration out on the person you're wanting to help, that always has been a problem for you. Luke, I know it's hard, but ya got to find a way to work out that frustration without taking it out on Bo. That girl hurt him in ways that we'll never be able to understand and more deeply than he's ever been hurt before, I don't think he'll get through this if he thinks you're mad at him. I know it's hard to think of Bo as fragile or vulnerable, but right now he is just that and what he needs more than anything is the strength to survive the trial, so's he can heal. You want to help your cousin Luke, that's how you do it, lend him your strength until he's got his own built back up,"Jesse advised, patting his nephew's back and leaving him to think about what he'd said.

When Bo returned a while later, neither of the boys said anything, they didn't need to. One look and they both knew the fight was over, that each had forgiven the other and was ready to move on. Smiling for the first time in days, Bo headed over to the General and started tinkering under the hood, relieved when Luke joined him a minute later.

Bo left the courthouse using every ounce of control he had to keep from running. The meeting with the prosecutor had been horrible. How was he going to testify against her, when he could barely answer one man's questions, and only Luke in the room with them? He wanted to jump into the General and take off, but Luke had the keys and would probably get mad if he just took off and left him. So instead he headed over to Cooter's garage, maybe L.B. would be there. He hadn't seen any of his friends in weeks, and L.B. always was pretty good at cheering him up with his jokes and carrying on like he did. Hearing L.B's voice, he smiled, good he is here, then he heard the words. "I just don't understand it Cooter, Billy said that his sister told him that Kathy Sue had raped Bo. But that can't be true, can it? I mean, they was together for a long time and she's real pretty, 'sides how can it be rape if he's willing, and he had to be willing. Didn't he?"

The shock Bo felt at his friends words was nothing compared to the hurt. Turning around he headed back to the courthouse, struggling to keep the tears back.

"L.B., sometimes I'm ashamed to say you're my cousin. Thought you was Bo's friend?" Cooter asked, coming out from under the car he was working on.

"I am his friend Cooter, but that don't answer my question."

"You mean didn't he have to be willing? Or if it's true that she raped him? Which reminds me, just how does Billy's sister know any of this stuff anyway?" Cooter asked, getting exasperated with his cousin.

"I done told ya Cooter, she works at the hospital and was there when Bo was brought in. Now are ya gonna answer my question or not?" L.B. asked, getting frustrated himself.

"Alright L.B. I'll answer you're question, with one of my own. How many times a day do you get... um, excited over nothing? There's your answer, you's a kid L.B. and so is Bo, just cause he mighta reacted to that girl don't mean she didn't force herself on him. And I ain't saying she did, I've heard the rumors too buddyrow, but I don't know if it's true and I ain't gonna ask neither. I'll tell ya this though, if Bo is your friend you need to be thinking about how you can help him instead of gossiping about him."

"Bo? You okay cousin?" Luke asked, when he found his cousin heading back to the courthouse. He hadn't been this relieved since Bo had woke up from that catatonic state. When he had come outside after his cousin and couldn't find him, he had felt the fears for his cousin coming to the surface. He had been relieved to see the General parked where they had left him, at least Bo wasn't trying to drive. As upset as he was, that was the last thing he needed to be doing, but that didn't help him figure out where Bo had gone. If he was honest with himself, what scared him was the thought that Bo might have gone somewhere to hurt himself. Luke knew that Bo had promised Uncle Jesse he wouldn't, had given his word as a Duke, but right now he was upset and hurting, and Luke wasn't sure he would remember that promise. Seeing the look on Bo's face, the tears shimmering in his eyes, he felt the relief at finding his cousin being replaced by worry. "Bo what's wrong? Are ya still upset about that meeting with Mr. Williamson?"

"No, I ain't upset 'bout that Luke. Can we just go home, please?" Bo begged his cousin, afraid that he would break down there and then, in front of God and everybody.

"Sure Bo, we can go, come on," Luke answered, leading his cousin back to the car and climbing in through the driver's window. As soon as they were out of town Bo broke down. Helping Bo the only thing on his mind, Luke twisted the wheel and turned onto a side road, quickly bringing the General to a sliding stop he turned to Bo. Not sure what to do, he did the only thing that made sense, wrapping his arms around his younger cousin, he just held him while the tears flowed, and quickly became powerful sobs. As the sobs tore through Bo's body, Luke kept a tight hold on him, rubbing soothing circles on his back, not asking any questions until the sobs began to slow. "Bo? Please talk to me, tell me what has you so upset, if it ain't the meeting we just had?"

Drawing back from Luke, Bo turned away and stared out the side window, ashamed of breaking down like he had. I can't believe I did that, bawling like a little kid in my cousin's arms. He must think I'm weak, heck he's right I am weak, letting a few words make me fall apart.

"Bo, come on please, let me help. Tell me what's wrong," Luke begged his cousin.

"I...I'm sorry Luke, I just...I know you don't want to hear it but Kathy Sue's right, I am worthless. Don't Luke, don't tell me I ain't, what do ya call a man who can't even talk about the past without getting upset. What would you call it when I break down like a baby, just cause of a few words from a friend. It ain't like I haven't thought it myself, so why does it get me all upset to hear him say it, unless she's right and I am worthless." Bo chanced a look at his cousin, before looking away again the shame of his breakdown, the shame of his actions with Kathy Sue too much to take.

"Bo, what are ya talking about? What friend and what did this friend say?"

"When I left the courthouse I's real upset, I thought about taking the General but you had the keys and I figured you'd get mad if I hotwired him and left ya stranded. So I headed over to Cooter's, thought maybe L.B. might be there, I ain't seen him in a while and he's always been able to cheer me up." Turning back to Luke, Bo tried to keep control while he finished his story. "He was there alright, talking to Cooter,...Luke he knew about what she did to me, there's rumors around town. But that ain't what's got me upset, I figured it wouldn't stay a secret, no matter how much I want it to. It was what he asked Cooter, he wanted to know how it could be ra...rape if I's willing, he thinks I wanted what she did, like I said ain't like I haven't wondered that. I'm sorry I broke down Luke, sorry I'm so weak, can't even handle the truth..."

"Beauregard James Duke, you don't have anything to apologize for and what L.B. said ain't the truth. We've talked about this Bo, you can't help how you reacted, that don't mean you wanted it or that it was your fault. Breaking down don't mean you're weak either, hell Bo I'd be shocked if you didn't break down from time to time. She put you through the wringer cousin, she took every bit of control away from you, she took a beautiful thing and made it ugly. I don't know how anybody could live through that and not have it get to them, please Bo don't think you're weak or worthless. I'm telling you cousin, I've been through a war, I've seen people do some pretty amazing things when they had to, but you are... Bo you're the strongest man I've ever known, to survive what she did and remain sane takes a strength that very few people have. I'm proud of you cousin, more proud than I could ever find words for," Luke smiled sadly at the surprise on Bo's face.

"You...you really mean that don't ya Luke?" Bo whispered, awed that his cousin, the cousin he had always looked up to felt that way about him.

"You bet I do Bo."

"Thanks Luke, I can't believe you think I'm strong, but I'll try to live up to that. I don't ever want you to be ashamed of me, I want you to always be proud of me. Let's go home now, okay?" Bo asked, sounding much calmer than he had before.

"Yeah let's, and then I'm gonna go have a talk with L.B," Luke vowed.

"No Luke, please don't, he didn't know I was there and ya can't get mad at him for wondering. Like I said I've wondered it myself and I was the one it happened to, so...please just let it go. Besides knowing Cooter he'll probably set him straight, if he hasn't already," Bo told him, not wanting to cause anymore trouble.

"Alright, but if I hear him saying anything like that again, I will make sure and set him straight. Guess we better get home now though, Jesse's probably wondering what's keeping us and he needs to know the trial date's been set for next week." Turning the key and bringing the powerful car to life, Luke turned around and headed to the farm, praying for the strength to help his cousin through the days to come.

TBC.

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