The Quiz Told Me To
Disclaimer: I do own Jessica, Christina and 'Type A Teen'. However I don't own NCIS or Motion City Soundtrack. But if anyone is offering…A/N: Well, I haven't done a TATE one shot in ages! Seeing as though Kate's still alive, it's an AU. Come on people, did she really die? It's not that great, but I had this idea a couple of months ago, wrote some notes down and only recently have I rediscovered it. Ah, the joys of cleaning ones room. Not.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo was bored.
Sure, he loved being in the law enforcement business, but some days, he wished he did something else. Anything, like a talk show host or an ambulance driver. Not that he didn't like 'saving the world one criminal at a time' as he described it to the ladies, but there were aspects of his job that he wished would go away.
Mainly those concerning paperwork.
Paperwork was the bane of his existence. It went on forever, like some sort of nightmarish never-ending loop. As soon as he'd finish one pile, another would appear. There were, however, certain activities her took part in that made paperwork slightly less mind numbing.
Such as annoying Caitlin Todd.
But, to his dismay, Kate wasn't there. She'd decided to have a late lunch with Abby and McGee. Tony was mentally kicking himself. He'd gone on a lunch date with Tiffany, or was it Brittany. That had been bust – instead of going back to her place like he'd originally imagined, she'd broken up with him, claiming her life coach thought he was a bad influence on her 'aura'. Why was it that the hot ones were so stupid?
So there he was, fifteen minutes into his hour without Kate, McGee and Abby and bored out of his mind. Gibbs had a meeting with the Director, so there was no immediate urgency to do his paperwork. To waste a few minutes, he decided to check his home email.
Spam, spam, don't want this, don't want that.
"Hang on a minute…" He mused.
At the top of the list there was an email from his sixteen-year-old cousin, Christina. He and Christina were great pals – he was the like the big brother she never had and she was the little sister he never had. They confided in each other and, as young as she seemed, gave him quite a bit of advice in the romance department. On more than one occasion, her help had gotten him out of some tricky situations. He started reading the email.
Heya Tony!
Howz it goin? I'm gr8 XD I gotta A 4 my IT assign. Thnx soooo much 4 ur help! Ur so rad!
Tony smiled to himself. If only she knew that he had actually bribed Probie to do it…
Anyhoo, my ipod is sooo rad, fo sho! I, like, totally lurve it! I'm listening 2 'Motion City Soundtrack', they're awesome and…
Tony skipped over the bit where she was going on about some bands. He made a mental not to ask Abby about it later – sometimes Christina managed to make him feel so old.
Me n' my bf – Jessica, she's totally awesome, found this quiz in the latest issue of 'Type A Teen'. I woz like 'OMG! This would sooo suit my cuz, Tony!' and Jess was like 'who's Ton?'. Anyhoo, I showed her a photo of u & she rekons ur totally hot! Lol! This quiz would sooo help u sort out whether or not u lurve that Kate chik ur always going on about…
Tony cringed. He'd made the mistake of telling Christina about Kate. Not that he 'liked' Kate; he wasn't sure exactly how he felt about her. While he wanted to forget he'd ever said anything, Christina wouldn't let the topic go. He scrolled down.
Do this quiz and remember: DON'T CHEAT! It'll ruin the fun of it!
Lotsa lurve,
Christina.
Tony rubbed his eyes. Reading his cousin's email had been like decoding encrypted text. The next generation was either going to be valuable decryptors or a threat to the continuation of the English language.
He scrolled down, quickly glancing over the quiz. It looked pathetic, but considering how bored he was, it was better than doing paperwork.
Do You Love Her?
Tony rolled his eyes. Judging by the title, this quiz was going to be lamer than he'd originally suspected.
Q1. What did you think when you first met your crush?
(a) Damn, she's fine!
(b) Nothing – I didn't really notice her at first.
(c) Wow, I wonder who she is.
The first person he thought of was Kate. Tony shook that through from his head. He didn't have a crush on Kate, did he? Hang on a minute, 'crush'? What was he, 14? He stared at the question.
"Come on, DiNozzo," he muttered to himself "this isn't rocket science."
He quickly chose C and moved on.
Q2. How long have you known this person?
(a) Not long enough (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)
(b) Seems like forever
(c) Long enough to 'know' her
Tony's mind wandered back to a conversation he'd had with Kate. Yes, in a way, he did know her. He knew her hates, her fears and, thanks to his careful spying, how she spent her time. He chose C.
Q3. How do you feel when you spend time with her?
(a) Nervous, tongue-tied
(b) Confident, like I'm talking to anyone else
(b) Unsure, I feel like I have to over-compensate for something
Tony scratched his head. This quiz was harder than he thought. His mouse hovered over the answer.
"Christ, DiNozzo, it's just an Internet quiz, no ones going to see it," Tony grumbled. He clicked C.
Q4. Would you date a co-worker?
(a) No way! I'd get fired.
(b) Depends if I could see the relationship going somewhere.
(c) If she's hot.
Was this quiz rigged? Seriously, it must be some plan concocted by Abby and McGee to humiliate him. These were all running through Tony's head. There was no way he'd break rule number 12 for some woman, but if she was worth it…if she was someone like Kate…B.
Q5. Who made the first move?
(a) She did.
(b) I did.
(c) Neither of us.
Tony sighed. Finally, an easy one. C.
Q6. How would you ask this person out?
(a) Casually, like it wasn't a big deal.
(b) With a dozen roses and a singing telegram.
(c) As a joke, in case she turned me down.
Well, it definitely wouldn't be A. Tony shook his head. Kate was more special than that and besides – it was a big deal. B seemed a bit showy, which narrowed it down to C.
Q7. How would you feel if you saw her with someone else?
(a) Angry. I'd key his car.
(b) I'd tease her about it, but be hurting on the inside.
(c) As long as she's happy, I'm happy.
Tony though back to Kate's last boyfriend – some drop kick lawyer named Chad. Yeah, he teased her a lot about it, and when the schmuck dumped her he wanted to key his car. But secretly he was happy when her relationships went bust. It made him feel as though he was in with a chance. B.
Q8. Your lying on the beach with her and a group of girls in skimpy bikinis sits down near you. Do you notice them?
(a) Hell yeah! I am male after all
(b) Yes, but I pretend not to
(c) How can I think about any other girl when she's lying next to me?
Tony laughed. A was so him, but there was something about C that made him reconsider. Kate, on the beach, in a skimpy bikini…how could he look at any other girl? C.
Q9. What would your date consist of?
(a) Dancing at the hottest club in town.
(b) An amusement park.
(c) I'd cook her dinner and walk her home.
The answer was C. An opportunity to show off his cooking talents and show Kate that he could be a gentleman? Why not take it!
Q10. The moment is here – you're alone and you're about to kiss her. What's your first kiss like?
(a) Too full on – tongue-wars, the works.
(b) Quick peck on the lips – Grandma kiss.
(c) Gently on the mouth, then deeper as things heat up.
If there was on thing Tony was good at, it was kissing. He'd been complimented on it – many times. His kissing style was no Grandma kiss, probably more A than anything else. But Kate, she deserved more than that; she was special. C.
Tony clicked submit answers.
Head Over Heals
This is the woman for you. This crush is more than lust; it's got the potential to be something that will last forever. She's everything you've ever wanted and lights up your world. She's your soul mate. Take a chance, it may work out. What are you waiting for?
Tony sat there. As crazy as it sounded, the quiz was right. What was he waiting for?
The elevator dinged and Tony quickly logged out. He stood up to greet his friends.
"Hey Tony," Abby greeted him "you missed an awesome lunch."
"Yeah," Kate chipped in, "did you have fun with Cindy?"
Cindy, that was her name.
"Cindy?" Tony laughed, "I broke up with her!"
"Wasn't the one for you, huh?" Kate asked, shuffling papers on her desk.
"See you guys," Abby and McGee headed down to the lab. Tony ignored them.
"You could say that," Tony mumbled. He walked over so he was standing behind Kate. "Hey Kate?"
"Yeah, DiNozzo," She quickly spun around, "Jesus! What are you-"
Tony silenced her with a soft, gentle kiss. When he noticed she wasn't responding, he broke away, embarrassed and hurt.
"I'm sorry, Kate, I – "
This time, Tony was the one interrupted in mid-sentence. Kate wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him. He kissed her back, passionately. It took a few seconds for Kate to come to her senses – they were making out in the bullpen, for crying out loud! They broke apart, gasping for breath.
"What was that for?" Kate whispered.
"I don't really know," Tony grinned, "let's just say the quiz told me to."
The End
A/N: This is dedicated to those TATE fans that wish they were the ones kissing Tony. I know who you are :p
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