Chapter: ENTER: SUGAR
MissLinuxthePenguin
Sirius Black had very very very limited experience with children.
There was Tonks as a ten-year old (many, many, many years ago), Harry as a baby, and Harry as a moody teenager.
Sufficient enough, he was no were prepared for the two time bombs sitting in front of him.
"Sirius!" The Tiny-Tonks screeched "I'M HUNGGRRRRRRYYY." Glass shook, windows shattered, and somewhere in a distant world James Potter was laughing.
"Er..."
And Sirius Black did what any male would do in such situation. He handed a large, bar of chocolate to the small girl, muttering about Merlin and irony.
"SIRRRRRRIUUS!" Little-Remus yelled "I WAAAANTTT SOOMMEE TOO!" And with that, Sirius Black made his second mistake.
Check.
The five year olds grinned evilly as they devoured the two chocolate bars.
In seconds the bars were gone. And the two little mouths were screaming again.
Nailing his coffin shut, Padfoot handed the two a bag of sugar-filled sweets and walked out of the room.
Check Mate.
Little Remus had an idea.
An idea involving stairs.
And he was very clear about it too.
"Remus, what are you doing?" Tiny Tonks (A/N: heh. they start w/ T!) looked at the boy strangely, trying to turn her hair the same shade of dirty blonde that graced his head. It wasn't working.
"Er.." Tiny Tonks looked like a .. sunflower. A .. pretty sunflower, but a sunflower none the less."I have a plan."
"What kind of plan?"
"A plan involving stairs!" Little Remus looked extremely proud of himself- Tiny Tonks giggled, turning a bright green.
"Can I help?"
"'Course, but you have to do what I say." Boys Tiny Tonks thought, turning blue. Stupid
The world officially hates me. Sirius Black was frustrated.
His wonderfully devious plan, had cracked into pieces within minutes.
Not to say that ALL of his wonderfully devious plans were eventually ruined COUGHjustmostCOUGH
But this one was truly, a loss.
When one plan fails, find another one.. and that, good madams and sirs, was what Sirius Black was currently doing.
'Two five year olds.. and one raving, ex-convict... Molly must be losing her touch..."
Somewhere, in the mist of muggle London, Molly Weasley felt a cold chill in the air and made a mental note to hurt Sirius.
Badly.
Back in Grimmuald Place, the sound of breaking glass echoed through the dark hallways and bleak corridors.
In an instant, Padfoot was sprinting down the stairs towards the kicten and -
as his feet left the second-to-last step he felt a strange pressure on his ankle.
And with that, Sirius Black 'gracefully' tumbled onto the floor in a head of robes.
Looking up, into the grinning face of Little Remus.
"Boo." The boy simply said, eyes on fire with evil childish joy.
Tiny Tonks, who was now sporting a rather fetching shade of navy blue giggled.
As she waved goodbye to her children- both biological and non- Molly Weasley smiled. And decided that maybe, just maybe, Sirius Black could be spared.
For that day.