Chapter: Nunquam scream procul a quietus werewolf.
MissLinuxthePenguin
"Cousin Sirius? Can Remus and I make breakfeast?"
Barley looking up from the letter, Sirius nodded. The little girl squeaked in delight and ran off to find Remus. Giving her cousin enough time to realize just what he had agreed to...
"REMMUS!" Tonks screamed at her partner in crime.
He snored.
She screamed.
He snored.
She screamed again.
He screamed.
"REMMMUSSS."
"WHAT!" Nunquam scream procul a quietus werewolf. Never scream at a sleeping werewolf.
"WE GET TO COOK TODAY'S BREAKFEAST! ISN'T THAT ABSOLUTELY EXCITING."
"What?" Tonks winked, trying to remind her partner in crime of the crime they were about to commit.
"Why are you winking like a dead seal?" Dead seals normally don't wink, but hey, whatever floats your boat Little Remus.
"CHOCOLATE CHIP PANCAKES, REMUS. CHOCOLATE CHIP PANCAKES."
"OOOH." Maybe there was hope for male kind. "Why?" Or not.
"BECAUSE, REMUS," Tonks said, her voice just oozing with venom. Evil, plotting venom that would kill even the most fiercest of bunnies. "WE DECIDED YESTERDAY THAT WE WANTED TO MAKE CHOCOLATE CHIP PANCAKES!"
"Okay." Neithless to say, Tonks was very very frustrated with Little Remus. Even if he did look adorably cute...
Upon realizing what disturbing trains of thought were running amock in her mind, our poor Nymphadora Tonks ran to the sink and for the next ten minutes proceeded to attempt to wash out her eyes.
Leaving Remus to wonder why he was stuck in the bleak kitchen at such an ungodly hour.
MEANWHILE
"So..." Fred was, well, bored.
Very bored. So very very bored.
As bored as an author on spring break with only days left to contemplate her sanity.
And Fred Weasley was not one to bore easily. But there is a limit for even the most un-bore-able persons.
After being stuck in a secret hideaway for days with his soon to become very annoying twin brother, awaiting punishment from their power-crazed mother, he could definitely say he was bored.
"So..." George, his soon to become very annoying twin brother, was also bored, but not for the same reasons as Fred.
George has a short attention span, like most normal humans do. A very short attention span.
He had spent the last two minutes watching a spider spin its web, and now?
Well, the spider was dead, the web was in pieces, and George was bored.Very very bored. Extremely bored. It was like someone had hexed him with the boring curse. Which was, in all essence, extremely boring.
After another moment of silence, a rat scurried across the floor- and George was no long bored.
"That's it." Fred was very tired of being very very bored.
"What's it?"
"Its time to go back to Grimmuald Place."
"Okay, but its my turn to be the good twin."
Fred rolled his eyes, staring at his soon to become very annoying twin. "Fine."
BACK AT GRIMMUALD PLACE
"YOU WANT ME TO WEAR WHAT!" Little Remus was alarmed. Frightened. Worried. Scared. And most of all, shocked.
Nymphadora Tonks was standing in front of him holding a bright green and pink, frilly, cooking apron. She herself was wearing a bright blue and purple apron in the same style- but that was not nearly as alarming as the green and pink apron she was holding out to Remus.
"Remus" She rolled her eyes, afterall this was beginning to get ridiculous "Just put the apron on!"
"Remus." She growled.
He gulped, his voice octaves higher "Okay."
OUTSIDE GRIMMUALD PLACE
"JUST KNOCK ON THE DOOR FRED!" George had been the nice, or was it good, twin for only ten minutes now and had become very tired of it.
"WHATEVER HAPPENED TO BEING THE GOOD TWIN, GEORGE!"
"I GOT TIRED OF IT."
"OH GETOFF FRED, YOU KNOW YOU PREFER BEING THE BAD TWIN!"
"STOP LAUGHING YOU OVERGROWN PRAT."
"OH FOR PETES SAKE. I'LL JUST KNOCK ON THE SODDING DOOR MYSELF. THERE, HAPPY?"
"Actually, now that you mention it, I am."
IN THE LIBRARY
Sirius Black was trying to work on his to-do list, but he was rudely interrupted as a loud knock rang through the house - shattering his ear drums and making his brain wish that it had gone into eternal darkness when it had the chance.
Regardless, how his brain felt about the situation, Sirius Black (only in soul and body, his mind was off sulking somewhere) sprinted down the stairs and joyfully pulled the front door open.
Only to be faced with the two red-headed twins that had been the cause of all his problems.
Without thinking, remember his brain is off sulking somewhere, he dived at the nearest twin and proceeded to attempt to strangle said twin.
"GEORGE YOU AND YOUR EVIL-"
"Sorry to rain on your parade Sirius, but thats Fred. I'm George."
Fred coughed loudly, glaring at Sirius.
"NONE THE LESS, I'LL KILL FRED FIRST AND THEN I'LL FINISH GEORGE OFF."
George spent the next three minutes laughing hysterically, while Fred's eyes grew to the size of saucers.
"BECAUSE OF YOU TWO, I'VE BEEN TRAPPED IN THIS GOD FORESAKEN HOUSE WITH THE SPAWNS OF THE DE-"
Sirius' rant was rudely interrupted as a loud crash rang through the house and smoke filled the air once more.
"Dear Merlin, not again.