The Lunacy of Lupin
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, all this stuff does not belong to me. Everything that is in any way related to Harry Potter or the Harry Potter series belongs to J.K. Rowling.
A/N: Partly due to my wish that Remus Lupin would go back and teach at Hogwarts (even though it's not going to happen) and partly just because I felt like it, Harry, Ron, and Hermione are all seventeen. Call it strange, whatever, that's just the way it is, ok? The age really has nothing to do with the rest of the story anyway.
Chapter One: Apple Butter
"Can't wait until Defense Against the Dark Arts! Professor Lupin said it would be really exciting! What about you, Harry? Ron?" Hermione said. Ron shrugged.
"Defense Against the Dark Arts is always interesting, Hermione. Nothing new." He had been being disagreeable. Just last week he had had a Howler from Mrs.Weasley because she found a stack of dirty magazines under his bed at home. It was an embarrassing scene not only for Ron, but for Harry and Hermione too; they had to witness Ron fuming about how he needed to 'express he emotions.'
Fifteen minutes later, they emerged from the Potions dungeon, all looking nervous about the sample they had turned in to Professor Snape. Harry could've sworn he'd left an uncrushed bat wing in his. When they arrived at the door to Professor Lupin's classroom, Ron flung it open in another bad temper, only to find himself in an aromatic experience.
Candles had been set everywhere, the entire room smelled of apple butter, and all the desks had been moved to the walls. In their place were little blue cushions that sat on the floor, each one surrounded by lit candles. The curtains on the windows were pulled shut; only the candles gave light to the room. And there, sitting on his desk, on top of papers and books, dressed in a turban and loincloth, was Professor Lupin. (A/N: This fic is G-rated, so just to let you know, the loincloth was not revealing, ok?)
"Um….Professor?" Hermione said tentatively. He was sitting in the yoga 'lotus' position, eyes closed. Suddenly they snapped open.
"Yes, Hermione?" he replied delicately.
"What--what have you done?" she asked, rather unflatteringly.
"I have embarked on a soul-searching journey. I am seeking my inner self, the me that yearns to break free from its restraints and--"
"Ok, we get it, Professor," said Ron crossly. Harry looked at Hermione, and then situated himself on one of the cushions. Across the room, Parvati and Lavender were giggling madly.
"C'mon," Harry said, grinning. "Just watch the candles, be sure not to--"
No sooner had he said this than Neville knocked one over. Quickly, before the wax got all over the floor, Neville picked it back up and set it down carefully.
"Sorry," he said.
"Shhh!" Professor Lupin said, sliding off his desk and moving gracefully over to the chalkboard. "Today," he continued peacefully, "we shall learn about erumpents."
Hermione looked puzzled. Lupin was being so peaceful, and yet they were learning about erumpents, which were basically rhinoceroses with magical qualities that produced catastrophic damage when provoked….
Professor Lupin led them through class making delicate comments and fluid movements. He was definitely not afraid of adjectives today, seeing as how he made frequent use of them. At the end of class, he told them that their homework was to relax their minds and think about what severe damage an erumpent could do if it was to run over their homes. He said all this in a very misty, faraway manner.
" Put the results of t your thoughts into an essay of any length and hand it in on Monday. By the way," he added to Harry as the rest of the class left, "to clear your mind, I highly recommend apple butter candles." He nodded to the many of them spread throughout the room.
" Thanks, Professor," Harry said, fighting down a laugh.
As soon as the class had gone, Professor Lupin rearranged his turban, made sure his loincloth covered him, and again resumed his position on the desk, thinking to himself that class went well and that he must try something new tomorrow….
Okay, so what do you think? Kinda short, I know, but I'll try to make it longer next time. If you have any suggestions as to what his next 'theme' should be (or any other comment for that matter), send it in a review. What will Lupin try next???
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, all this stuff does not belong to me. Everything that is in any way related to Harry Potter or the Harry Potter series belongs to J.K. Rowling.
A/N: Partly due to my wish that Remus Lupin would go back and teach at Hogwarts (even though it's not going to happen) and partly just because I felt like it, Harry, Ron, and Hermione are all seventeen. Call it strange, whatever, that's just the way it is, ok? The age really has nothing to do with the rest of the story anyway.
Chapter One: Apple Butter
"Can't wait until Defense Against the Dark Arts! Professor Lupin said it would be really exciting! What about you, Harry? Ron?" Hermione said. Ron shrugged.
"Defense Against the Dark Arts is always interesting, Hermione. Nothing new." He had been being disagreeable. Just last week he had had a Howler from Mrs.Weasley because she found a stack of dirty magazines under his bed at home. It was an embarrassing scene not only for Ron, but for Harry and Hermione too; they had to witness Ron fuming about how he needed to 'express he emotions.'
Fifteen minutes later, they emerged from the Potions dungeon, all looking nervous about the sample they had turned in to Professor Snape. Harry could've sworn he'd left an uncrushed bat wing in his. When they arrived at the door to Professor Lupin's classroom, Ron flung it open in another bad temper, only to find himself in an aromatic experience.
Candles had been set everywhere, the entire room smelled of apple butter, and all the desks had been moved to the walls. In their place were little blue cushions that sat on the floor, each one surrounded by lit candles. The curtains on the windows were pulled shut; only the candles gave light to the room. And there, sitting on his desk, on top of papers and books, dressed in a turban and loincloth, was Professor Lupin. (A/N: This fic is G-rated, so just to let you know, the loincloth was not revealing, ok?)
"Um….Professor?" Hermione said tentatively. He was sitting in the yoga 'lotus' position, eyes closed. Suddenly they snapped open.
"Yes, Hermione?" he replied delicately.
"What--what have you done?" she asked, rather unflatteringly.
"I have embarked on a soul-searching journey. I am seeking my inner self, the me that yearns to break free from its restraints and--"
"Ok, we get it, Professor," said Ron crossly. Harry looked at Hermione, and then situated himself on one of the cushions. Across the room, Parvati and Lavender were giggling madly.
"C'mon," Harry said, grinning. "Just watch the candles, be sure not to--"
No sooner had he said this than Neville knocked one over. Quickly, before the wax got all over the floor, Neville picked it back up and set it down carefully.
"Sorry," he said.
"Shhh!" Professor Lupin said, sliding off his desk and moving gracefully over to the chalkboard. "Today," he continued peacefully, "we shall learn about erumpents."
Hermione looked puzzled. Lupin was being so peaceful, and yet they were learning about erumpents, which were basically rhinoceroses with magical qualities that produced catastrophic damage when provoked….
Professor Lupin led them through class making delicate comments and fluid movements. He was definitely not afraid of adjectives today, seeing as how he made frequent use of them. At the end of class, he told them that their homework was to relax their minds and think about what severe damage an erumpent could do if it was to run over their homes. He said all this in a very misty, faraway manner.
" Put the results of t your thoughts into an essay of any length and hand it in on Monday. By the way," he added to Harry as the rest of the class left, "to clear your mind, I highly recommend apple butter candles." He nodded to the many of them spread throughout the room.
" Thanks, Professor," Harry said, fighting down a laugh.
As soon as the class had gone, Professor Lupin rearranged his turban, made sure his loincloth covered him, and again resumed his position on the desk, thinking to himself that class went well and that he must try something new tomorrow….
Okay, so what do you think? Kinda short, I know, but I'll try to make it longer next time. If you have any suggestions as to what his next 'theme' should be (or any other comment for that matter), send it in a review. What will Lupin try next???