Pither is riding along in a lush valley with rice and barley fields. On the roadside a young monk in his red and saffron robes is sitting on his suitcase. Pither stops. We don't hear the conversation but Pither apparently offers to give the monk a ride. The monk pulls his suitcase, which has wheels, behind Pither's bicycle.
Cut to Pither cycling with the monk riding on the suitcase being pulled behind the bicycle.
The monk has an oval face. He has a genial expression. He wears wire-framed glasses. His head was shaved but is growing back.
Monk: My name is Phorbu Tsering.
Pither (looking over his shoulder): My name is Arthur Pither. Mr. Arthur Pither of 365 Compton Road, Tewkesbury. Or at least I'm pretty sure it is. I had the strangest experience a few days ago. You won't believe this but for a brief period of time I thought I was BBC television personality Michael Palin conducting an interview with the Dalai Lama.
Tsering: A Buddhist would believe that you were this Palin person in a previous incarnation.
Pither: Yes, well, that would be a plausible explanation, except that Michael Palin isn't dead yet.
Tsering: Oh.
Pither: Where are you going? Are you on a pilgrimage to holy shrines?
Tsering: No, I'm going to America. I have a friend who can obtain a visa for me. America is the land of freedom and opportunity. It opens its arms to embrace people from all over the world who wish to pursue their dreams. It is where I can enter "American Idol" and become a pop singing sensation.
Pither: But what about maintaining your ancient traditions? What about preserving wisdom in your monasteries? Don't you want to provide leadership for your people in exile?
Tsering: But, Pither, I'd rather…I'd rather…sing!
Music swells up. It's "My heart will go on" from the movie "Titanic". Pither waves his arms wildly to stop the music which grinds to a halt.
Pither: No, no! There'll be no Celine Dion on my cycling tour!
A title appears on the screen: "Across the Himalaya with Celine Dion".
Pither: No, sorry, that's wrong! (He waves his arms as if to shoo the letters away.)
Pither is riding through a city, still pulling Tsering. The traffic is thick and chaotic. There are bicycles, scooters, farm trucks, motor rickshaws, buses and private cars all honking their horns and not paying much attention to traffic rules.
Cut to shot from camera mounted on the front of Pither's bicycle. As he weaves through the traffic, cows suddenly saunter in front of him. A collision looks unavoidable. The sounds stop.
Cut to long shot of Pither riding through city streets.
Pither (voice-over): April 23. Did not run into sacred cow in Srinagar. (The traffic noise resumes.)
Cut to Pither riding on a country road. He disappears from camera view on the right. There is the sound of monkeys shrieking and a crash.
Pither (voice-over): April 27. Ran over monkey outside Ladakh. Today is the day dedicated to Hanuman, the Monkey King. Phorbu tells me this is a very bad omen.
Montage of shots of Pither at various temples. He has a bandage on his left arm and Tsering's head is bandaged. Pither is in a line of devotees waiting to feed sprigs of juniper branch into small open ovens. They leave offerings of food or wine by the fire. The camera pans across men turning prayer wheels. It comes to Pither turning the largest wheel but in a counter-clockwise direction. Tsering gently shows him that he is turning it the wrong way. Pither jovially corrects his error. Pither cycles through prayer flags hung on lines and gets tangled up. Tsering helps him tie his handkerchief to a line.
Tsering: We receive many donations from famous Hollywood celebrities. Look at these prayer flags.
Close-up of the flags which say "Donated by Tim Robbins" or "Gift of Susan Sarandon".
Cut to Pither and Tsering standing by a plain modern wall.
Tsering: And how about this!
There is a sign that says: "Sulabh Public Toilets, Baths and Sanitary Complex. Paid for by the sponsorship of Richard Gere. May all your bodily processes be blessed."