Star Warriors of the Dynasty Ocean

Description: Fayt and company check out a Gemity simulator that transports them to ancient China. Many, many pairings ensue. Rated T for implied sex. Do not proceed if you do not like male/male, threesomes, foursomes, and … yeah, well you've been warned.

Disclaimer: Star Ocean: Till the End of Time and its characters are the property of Square-Enix. Dynasty Warriors and its characters are the property of KOEI. The insanity in this fic is unfortunately all mine.

A/N: Hooray reviews! Thank you so much. I'm glad you're getting a kick out of this silliness.

xXx

Maria

Maria sighed to herself, bored. She had been walking around for quite some time now and had seen a number of cute guys, but none of them had struck her as being particularly worth her time. Maybe she would go home early and treat Lieber to a sweet smile and an innocent hair flip. That would keep him groveling after her for at least a week.

Happily distracted, she walked around a tree and nearly collided with a wall of flame.

"Drat," a woman's voice complained. "Still not wide enough."

Maria blinked for a bit before seeking out the source of her near-death. Two women were standing next to what looked like a giant wooden cat.

"It looked all right to me," the younger one said, tilting her head prettily.

"No, it isn't," the older one responded, tinkering with something inside the cat's belly. "I need to incinerate as many peons as possible.

"Excuse me," Maria interrupted, "but I think you should be a bit more careful. You nearly roasted me."

The young one lifted her head and smiled at Maria. "Yue Ying," she laughed, "you almost killed a complete stranger."

"That's the point, Xing Cai," the older replied, straightening and wiping off her hands. She glanced briefly at Maria. "Of course we're usually at war with them first." She gave what Maria supposed was an apologetic shrug and dove back into the cat.

Maria walked over to them and found a safe spot from which to watch. "What are you doing?"

Xing Cai shrugged. "Oh her husband improved his arbalest, so she's trying to make her juggernaut more deadly."

From inside the cat, a muffled voice cried, "I will not fall behind in the KO count!"

Xing Cai continued, "Personally, I don't think the count is as important as each individual kill." She pulled out a weapon that reminded Maria of a huge barbeque fork. "I like the squelchy sound as the blade goes in, the knowledge that I'm rearranging organs. How about you?" she asked Maria.

Maria pulled out her gun and twirled it. "I like to pop their heads off from afar. Either that or kick them into a bloody mess."

As Xing Cai nodded her approval, Yue Ying stood up and announced, "Okay, I need a break. Anything you bloodthirsty ladies would like to do?"

The three of them thought for a moment. Then, Maria said, "Paint our nails and talk about boys?"

"All right!" Xing Cai cried, her eyes sparkling. Yue Ying smiled in agreement.

xXx

A/N: Maria was the hardest one for me to pair for some reason. She just didn't want to go with any of the guys. And then I thought of putting her with the Shu ladies and having all three go OOC girly. Man, I want to be invited to that sleepover.