Fuck it. I can't leave the boys all alone. Behold what happens at seven thirty in the morning when I have yet to sleep. Coffee! And, maybe, if I'm lucky, the next one won't have anything to do with these two…damnit…

grins But I do like the idea of Fuery back-sassing his superiors.

Disclaimer: Don't own, don't really wanna own.

Four hundred twenty-seven words: Shoes

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"But–"

"Shut up."

"Well, but–"

"Shut up."

"But Sir–"

"Shut. Up."

"Sir, you – Havoc! We can't–"

Havoc grinned. Fuery glared, but that had shut him up, and turned him a lovely shade of red to boot, that color just between bright red and crimson that probably meant Fuery was about to have an aneurysm.

"I can't believe you just did that," Fuery finally said through gritted teeth. "Sir," he added as an afterthought.

If he dies of a massive hemorrhage in his brain, it'll be my fault, Havoc realized with another grin. He flicked his lighter, held it to the tip of the cigarette that had been in his mouth for quite a while, and tucked the lighter into a pocket. Fuery wasn't looking at him. Well, if the ground was so interesting…maybe Fuery had found a bug that would die with or without intensive care…Havoc tossed himself to the ground at the younger man's feet in order to meet his eyes. "Not speaking to me, Sergeant Major?"

"No, Sir – Agh." Havoc let him berate himself for a little while, taking a few well-needed hits of nicotine. When Fuery had himself under control, Havoc stood again.

"It was just a bit of fun, Kain," he murmured with a frown.

Silence.

"You know, I could order you to talk," Havoc pointed out, looking to the sky and taking another drag.

This too was met with silence.

"Although, I was trying to get you to shut up anyway – not that that's usually a problem."

A harrumphing sound, like air escaping from a tire, came out of the Sergeant Major. "You…you…" But he couldn't seem to get past just who had committed such an atrocity.

"No one's dead, kid, y'know?"

"Hmph."

"Shit, Fuery, it was just a ladybug."

Fuery looked horrified. "Ladybug?"

"Uh, yeah. The ladybug. I thought that was what you were–"

"You got rid of a ladybug and killed a squirrel without any reason whatsoever?"

"Squirrel?"

"Your shoe."

Havoc looked down at his feet, one clad in a boot and the other only in a sock. He had thrown the missing boot at a squirrel that had annoyed him, and…oh. Havoc sighed, dropped his cigarette, and ran a hand through already-shaggy hair before the absurdity of the situation struck him. Letting out a laugh, he clapped Fuery on the shoulder and trotted off to find his missing shoe.

"I didn't kill it, you idiot," he called behind him.

"No, you didn't," Fuery admitted under his breath. "The smell of your damn shoes did."