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Silence. That was all that was heard through out Severus's Snape house. Yet it was not the normal silence where there was no one around but his guilt, anger, and worry about the world and where he stood in it. This time he had someone. The problem was how to keep that person here with him. Unlike all of the others who just picked up and left when it got to tough and the sobs got too intense. No, this time was different. There was no choice in the matter here. He had to stay there, for both their sakes. It was a matter of life or death

Severus looked over at his lover's sleeping body. He watched him sleep peaceful. Watching him inhaling and exhaling without a care in the world or without the struggle they were about to endure. He liked that Remus could feel that way for once. He wished that he could protect him so he never would have to feel anything else. Yet Remus was too determined to not let Severus fight his battle alone. He knew that he would not just sit there idly by and watch him struggle for both of their lives. He was there for whatever happened to them.

Severus started to pace back and forth. It was a nervous habit that he couldn't shake loose. He thought of the day's events .He thought of the tasks that lie ahead and consequences that soon would come after. Shall he once again cower to the floor, tail between his legs and kiss the Darks lord's feet and kill the only person that could truly make him stand up to his toughest fears? Or shall he run away, hiding for the rest of his days, and let the perceptions of him by others just fill the shadows of where he once stood. Ah, the irony. It was a choice between shaking the untruthful layers that surround him or just let them close around him while he quietly slip away in the darkness. Being a coward, something he promised himself he will never be. Both mean life or death. There is no other solution. No other compromise.

Yet it is not just his life that he will have to worry about anymore. Loving each other means that there is now a large target on each of their backs. He knew one thing: They would not let the love between them die. If this meant running or fighting, there was no turning back now.

Severus knew that all this couldn't just be dumped on his and Remus's shoulders. They would need help and advice. They needed that knew close to all. Severus could even bet that he knew that they were together. He was off to see Dumbledore. After kissing Remus's forehead, He apparated to Hogsmeade.

He reached The Three Broomsticks smoothly and before he could get to the door. A wise but caring voice spoke out behind him

"Ah, Severus, my boy, I was wondering when I would see you," Dumbledore said in his usual all knowing voice.

Of course, the old man knew. He was all knowing in ways that even the wisest became puzzled. Yet many did not ask how Albus Dumbledore knew what he knew. It was one of the many unexplainable mysteries that would stay unsolved.

"Headmaster, sir, I was just about to come and fund you, but I guess you already knew that," Severus said

"Ah, yes, I did have a strange feeling I would be seeing you yet I thought for sure that Remus would be joining us," Dumbledore said questioning

"No, it's just me but as you also know, we are in need of your assistance." Dumbledore just nodded and began to speak when Severus continued

"Yet I also needed to tell you that the Dark Lord has new orders for me and I'm afraid that will not fulfill them," Severus said while looking down

He began to tell Dumbledore the previous day events about the full moon, his and Remus's newly found love, and finally Lucius's sudden drop in.

"He...he….I mean…the Dark lord wants me to kill," Severus begins to tear up and just bows his head. His hair blocks the whole sight, but everybody that was paying attention could feel his pain.

"Severus, you need not say more, for once your emotions say it all." Dumbledore said as he continued." " The order will protect Remus, though he must go into hiding."

"NO…I thought you of all people would understand …YOU are saying that he must be protected FROM me…that he must be hidden FROM me….we decided that nothing would destroy our love," Severus said defensively.

"There is no other way, I'm sorry, but this must happen, for both of your sakes." " It has to seem that you two have no relations so Lord Voldemort must not get suspicious"" Yet you will still be able to see Remus…. I promise," Dumbledore trying to clam down Severus

"I promised Remus that we would never leave each others side. I promised that the Dark Lord would never destroy our love. AND I promised that I would never run away with my tail between my legs. I will take a stand, with or without your help. I'm not going to sit there and watch the only person that truly cares about me die.

"Very well, I will alert the order of this news and start training for the upon coming battle." "I pray that your love resist the many struggles for this battle will be long," as with this Dumbledore was at the door.

"And Severus, Remus is not the only one that truly cares so don't make that mistake and push away those who try and help." Dumbledore said wisely as the door shut leaving Severus sitting, tears rolling down his once emotionless face.

Remus woke to cold silent room from his peaceful rest. He guessed that Severus was out. So much as happened in the last few days, he wasn't been able to just think. It's been such a blur that he himself doesn't really know what's happening. It's all so surreal

He loved Severus, even before that night. He loved him when he was just that rejected boy that was terrorized by his group of friends. He could never understand why James and Sirius made fun of him the major part of their schooling at Hogwarts. He only could guess that Severus threatened his two best friends. They knew he was strong and probably smarter than both of them. Or maybe they saw the aura around him that just said Stay back or feel my wrath, like he often did. They knew he had to be taken down a peg so he didn't threaten their post. Remus just couldn't stand him being terrorized so as un-marauder as it was, he also made it a point, to help him down or give some kind of kind gesture. He needed to show that the Marauder, the most popular group of Hogwarts, weren't a just evil monarch, that they had a kind side to them too.

Through the 5th, 6th, and 7th years of Hogwarts, Remus could feel that him and Severus were growing closer. No, it wasn't like a simple hello, or a few words when passing in the hallway. He felt like they were growing closer internal. Like they were closer in their day-to-day struggles. Like they were just followers, following friends or just following the schools population just trying to fit, so their problems wouldn't be revealed and malice wands soon be pointed at them. It was like they were one in the same. Yet only Remus was lucky enough to be protected and got to live in peace with the exception of his "furry problem"

He always just wanted to cup Severus's pale soft cheek, look into Severus pretty black eyes, and tell him that it was going to be ok. He wanted to tell the world just to stay away from the misunderstood boy. He wanted only to protect him. Yet this was the real world. They came from two different houses; both know to hate each other. No love or even friendship could blossom from underneath the stone grip of hatred between the houses.

He couldn't get to him either after Graduation simply cause nobody could seem to located him. Or they knew was he was gone. He was a Death eater. Remus knew that all hope was lost here. There was no way that he could get to him. For the Light cannot

Penetrate the dark. All he could do was wait and hope that all hope wasn't lost. He still thought Severus was not totally gone until the night of 0ctober 31 1981, the night where his best friends, James and Lily Potter, were murdered and their one year old son Harry Potter, began the boy who lived. Remus was heartbroken of the deaths and all hope was destroyed for the misunderstood man's innocent. He wasn't mad enough to threaten to make Severus pay; he just disregarded him even though the tugs of his heart wouldn't let him. He realized that it was his life and even crept across the thought that his friends pushed him into this path of darkness. He shuddered at the thought.

As Severus and him lives took completely different turns, the connections of being one in the same still stood. Even though they never corresponded with each other, for that owl would be very awkward. How would it start? Dear Severus, I wish for you not to be a death eater because I love you and I am sorry if my friends pushed you to the dark side. That would not work. They once again were different side. They couldn't love each other or even have a friendship. Even when Severus became a double spy, it was much too difficult.

So until that fateful day in Knockturn alley, any thoughts of Severus Snape was pushed so far back of Remus Lupin's mind. All of those dreadful night that he woke up screaming Snape's name, all those lustful dreams that would send him to hell if anybody could read his mind. All those thoughts came falling back to him. Yet now he could sense there was something behind those sarcastic words. There was almost a longing mixed up in his tone.

Until that night of the full moon, Remus never understood Severus even though he sure did try. He never saw the glances across the Great halls, the smiles when his back was turn, or those hurtful comments were not meant to wench his heart but to calm it with the kindness underneath. He was blind to the love that was there all along to that night.

"Ohhhhh…that night," Remus groaned the thought of that night. He never knew being a werewolf could bring so much happiness. He never expected that yearning for something could make the transformation so much smoother. It didn't even matter anymore; he wouldn't be alone yet he never really was. He had the best friends that anybody could of asked for. Yet now with just one transformation, he feels so much freer. Plus this curse turned into a treasure. He has found a mate. Someone that would protect him and who he could protect, he loved that feeling

Most of all he loved how he had finally found his true love. For once, he got what he wanted. He was never going to let go of Severus. It was a life or death matter. They were each other's and nothing was going to change that. He would fight Earth, wind, and fire for him. He was not a love person but once he loved someone, he would fight to the die defending him or her. He was very loyal and he meant business. Especially in this case, he has never felt more love for someone.

Just then the front door opened, as Severus walked in downtrodden. Remus heard him collapse on the couch. He ran in to see his head down and his hands just hiding his face.

Remus ran to him, straddled him, cupped his chin and gave Severus a kiss of 10 or more year of pent up passion

Severus could feel that kiss down to his toes


well i finally updated. hope it wasnttoo long. anyway enjoy...and review please.