When Writers Go Bad: Chapter Five
Lita grumbled as she yanked a plot bunny from off her ankle where it had attached itself, sighing happily. Damn, stupid things! She wondered how long it would take to get the fluff dust from out of the creases of her dress and the stuff that had fallen to the carpet in her bedroom.
"Why don't they follow you?" she whined to Shadow, who was busily cutting some straws.
"I'm more careful than you are; stuff doesn't get into my clothes," she said shortly, focusing intently.
Ellen was busy giggling and playing with a small, blue rubber ball with her favorite bunny, Steve, on the kitchen floor, while Lita kicked the bunnies away at every turn.
"Okay!" Shadow announced, wheeling on her companions. "We'll draw straws to see who takes who to what room."
Ellen saluted, and reluctantly put the rubber ball away, Steve's ears drooping disappointingly. "Roger!"
"Let's see….." began Shadow. "Shortest straw takes the nut jobs from 1792, middle straw takes the people from Les Mis, and the tall straw takes the people who are hanging out with The Phantom of the Opera. Understand?"
"Yeah, yeah, we got it already! Can we go now? Pridenth's going to get hungry! I haven't had the chance to feed her yet today!" Lita exclaimed.
"You can feed your dragon when we're done," Shadow promised, putting her hand out, which contained the three straws.
Carefully, Lita drew one out, and refused to look at it until the others got theirs. Ellen drew hers as well, humming merrily to herself, which left Shadow with hers. Nervously, she looked down into her hand and announced "Middle. I got Les Mis."
Lita followed suit with "Phantom, yes! I was afraid I was going to end up with that psycho who keeps on trying to knock down the door, and shouting 'Open in the name of the Republic!''"
Ellen stared, amazed. "Is that the password or something?"
Lita rolled her eyes, and replied, sarcastically "Oh sure, that's how all doors open around here! That and 'Open Sesame!'"
"Wow! Neat!" Ellen cried, and Shadow whapped Lita upside the head. "Moron! Now you've given her ideas!"
"You're the moron!"
"No, you are!"
"No, you are!"
"No, you are!"
"No, you are!"
The argument would have continued thusly for several minutes had Ellen not done what she always did when they fought (which was at least five times a day): Whine.
"Guys…." she complained. "Can we go now?"
Shadow cut off Lita, who was about to respond with the same remark as before, and answered "Of course, Ellen. Let's get going!"
…
"You're that demon from before!" Cosette cried as Shadow lead the four down the hall towards where the rooms were.
Sighing, she turned and replied "For the last time, I'm not a demon! I'm not even evil!"
"It's true!" called Ellen, who was leading her trio behind Shadow. "She fights crime and hates gun. Besides, she cries in movies. Evil people don't cry in movies."
Blushing furiously at Ellen's revealing of her soft spot for sappy movies, Shadow wheeled on her and shouted "You shut up!" before turning back and silently leading the other's down the hall. Lita was trying hard not to snicker behind her hand.
The odd procession was led through a large dinning hall, which was being cleaned and polished by numerous bunnies, and down another corridor until they came to a fork. "Let's see, how are we going to do this?" contemplated Shadow aloud. "I got it! Okay, Lita, you and Ellen watch the girls for a minute while I take the guys down their hall, I'll come back, take the girl's down theirs, and then Ellen and I will do the same for you. And so on, and so forth."
"Got it," agreed Lita.
Marius, however, was quickly protesting, tightly holding on to Cosette. "But…But I want to stay with Cosette!"
"Tough," replied Shadow with a shrug. "Guy's get one hall, girls get another."
"But we're married!"
"Take it up with Shadow13, I'm only the lackey." With that, she reached for her sword hilt; not her weapon of choice, but effective.
Marius reluctant released his beloved with a sigh. "Alright, I give up."
"I'm glad you see it my way," she said with a smile, motioning to Valjean, Marius, and Javert to follow her. Not knowing what else to do, they followed. A few minutes later, the cry "Cry me a river, build me a bridge, and get over it!" could be heard echoing down the hall. Ellen peered down the dark corridor curiously, and Lita simply ignored it. Shadow then came back, in a bad mood from arguing with Baron Pontmercy.
"Right, Cosette, come on; I'll take you to your room," she sighed, flicking her cape behind her. Whimpering, Cosette nervously followed, and Shadow soon returned alone.
"Okay, Lita, it's your turn."
Lita sighed and asked Raoul and Erik to please come with her. Raoul reluctantly released Christine's hand, gazing at her longingly, before sighing and following Lita down the dark hall. She returned without incident and lead Christine down her hall.
Unlocking the door, Lita flipped the light switch, brightening the room. It looked much like your standard, modern day hotel room, complete with a mini-bar, as well as complimentary soap. Christine steeped in, plucking at her delicate glove. Finally, she turned and asked "Can't I please stay with Raoul?"
Lita was in the mood to be charitable, and said with extreme pity "I'm sorry, but rules are rules. Talk to Shadow13 at dinner tonight; She'll probably jump at the chance to make you happy."
"Thank you," Christine mournfully murmured, taking in the room.
"If you need anything, just use the phone. It goes down to the plot bunny desk, and they'll send whatever it is you want on up." Lita then pointed out the doors on either side of the wall that lead to the other rooms. "If you get lonely, just visit one of the other girls. Need anything else?"
Christine could think of nothing that could be granted by the girl, and replied no.
Finally, Lita walked back down the hall, giving Ellen her turn. To be different, she took Marguerite down first, and then came back for Percy and Chauvelin.
But after a quarter of an hour of waiting and waiting for Ellen to come back, Shadow and Lita began to get nervous.
"How about we flip for it?" suggested Lita. "Head I win, tails you loose."
Shadow rolled her eyes. "That must have taken you all day to come up with. We'll both go down and make sure she's alright. We probably shouldn't have let her go by herself in the first place."
Lita gave in, and they both walked down the hall.
When they reached Ellen, she was safe and sound, and Blakeney and Chauvelin were simply standing there rather boredly. Instead of using the key to unlock the door, Ellen had remembered what Lita had said: Doors opened with a password. For the past twenty minutes, Ellen had been shouting "Open in the name of the Republic!" and "Open Sesame," at the doors, with absolutely no luck.
Lita smacked her palm to her forehead while Shadow looked just about ready to kill her.
"This is all your fault, you know! You had to open your mouth, and give her stupid, ridiculous ideas!"
Lita would have replied had Shadow not held a hand up, silencing her. Taking her key, Shadow slid it into the lock and unlocked the door. "Sir Blakeney, your room," she groaned. "I'm terribly sorry about all this."
Sir Percy walked in silently, and Shadow set Ellen straight about the doors, telling her to open Chauvelin's room – and to use the key this time! Ellen did so, and the three walked smoothly back up the corridor, ready to relax until dinner.
To Be Continued…..