Jessica
00000
I always suspected I was the brains of this world conquering operation, but now I had definite proof. I only wished I'd known about this sooner.
Maybe I was also a cliche villainess, and just didn't know it.
Killing the only force strong enough to slow down Flo was stupid. But what could I do about it now? I was a damn bird!
I frowned as I saw Drew kneeling by the dying bird's side, looking sad.
I didn't know how sad until he kissed her on the beak. It didn't help anything, but I guess baby farm managers have to get love wherever they can find it.
"Nice friend you've got," I heard an orange cat bird say to me. "Is she always this bright?"
"She has her moments."
I didn't notice it at the time, but Flo had dropped one of her spikes in the scuffle. I should have noticed it, but I didn't. I think it may have something to do with me nearly being choked to death.
I would have continued to think nothing of it, had not I, at the present moment, suddenly noticed a giant robotic figure rising up from the side of the building.
It had animal features, car features, its head made out of a spaceship. It looked like someone had built a cop robot out of Voltron, a Transformer, and Mazinga.
The machine had a cap with a badge on it, and a badge on its square truck window chest, from which an animated spider looked out. Instead of a face, I saw a domed spaceship window with a cartoon cop inside.
The robot rose over the rooftop with rocket boots, clenching its metal fists as it stared down Flo. "Cool World PD! Drop the spikes!"
"Never!" Flo shouted, twirling her staff.
The moment she fired, the robot drew a giant glowing blade. "Go Blazing Sword!"
The sword blocked the attack.
Flo roared in anger, using her staff to send a cloud of birds into the robot's face.
As it staggered back, Flo twirled her staff again. "Hey, Robo Dick! Try this on for size!" And she shot him.
`Robo Dick' transformed into a giant metal condor, which squawked and pecked at her with its giant beak.
"Nice try!" the voice boomed, its pilot still not feathery.
The spider, well, I've never seen a bird spider before, but there it was.
Making use of the distraction, Drew's (ugh) sister came out with guns blazing, firing shot after shot at the monster.
The bullets did damage, but Flo just laughed and raised her staff, making her whole body glow. Her wounds closed, and the Deebes girl became nothing but a Caucasian colored flightless bird waddling around on the roof.
Holli Would picked her up and carried her away. If anyone else was coming, they weren't in a hurry.
I imagine Flo would have done something to Holli as well, but at that moment, the cop tried to peck her in the skull with Condorbot. The two fought viciously.
Then I saw Misty picking up Cupcake's tiara.
"Yeah!" I called as I flew close to her. "Put it on! It's the only way to stop this thing!"
She did.
All of a sudden, Misty resembled something the queen from the Alien films would buy in a pet store. A large eyeless bug-like bird, kind of a canary looking thing, if you combined it with a beetle.
She raised her claws, as if casting a magic spell, then great swarms of birds came pecking and clawing at the reptile, knocking her backwards.
I thought we were doing good, but then Flo slammed her staff down on the rooftop, and a huge explosion knocked me, Misty, the robot, and the cloud of birds away in a blast of brilliant light.
The robot tumbled off the side of the building. I and Misty fell flat on the gravel.
I saw Drew swinging his arms wildly as he flew over the edge. I hoped he was okay.
As I shook myself off and flapped into the air again, I suddenly noticed a Goth chick, a real one, pick up a spike (Flo dropped another one) shoving it into a cartoon guitar.
The girl played something that sounded like Metallica, and as she did this, a flying golden amplifier blasted Flo with a wave of sound, throwing her across the roof.
Goth chick did another riff, blowing Flo over the ledge with a scream.
Only a minute or so later, the reptile came flying back up.
In her claws, she had her own `ax', and in a few flicks of a guitar pick, blasted us with riffs that I would compare to that of Zakk Wylde, blowing us all away. Literally.
What followed was, um, kind of like The Battle of the Bands, or that scene at the end of Tenacious D and The Pick of Destiny, where the guitarist faced off against the other in musical combat. Very entertaining.
Goth girl hit her with something in a Baroque style, transitioning into an Iron Maiden song, which really isn't a stretch.
Flo hit her back with something Led Zepplin-ish, though it didn't sound like Stairway.
It probably would have gone on like this for some time, and not really accomplish anything, but all of a sudden I saw the robot flying up behind Flo, raising its Blazing Sword.
The reptile let out a demonic howl as the blade plunged through her body.
But then she laughed, her body glowing as she shoved the blade out the way it came.
When she had it all the way out, she grabbed it by the handle, slicing the robot in half.
The bird spider and the cartoon cop let out screams as they tumbled through the air.