Mark: ((looks up from the newspaper at Roger's grumbling)) Should I move it?
R: It'd just jump out at me from somewhere else tomorrow. Fuckin' thing hates me. ((looks at Mark, suddenly hopeful)) Coffee?
M: ((motions with his finger towards the pot on the counter)) Almost done brewing...made it pretty strong...
R: ((smiles a little and rubs his eyes)) My friend. My brother. My... wonderful... coffee-making... person... Yeah. ((yawns))
M: ((pulls out a chair and smiles meekly at Roger, before grabbing a chipped mug from the cabinet))(( I try...atleast you appreciate it...
R: ((nods)) I appreciate anything that means I don't have to brew m'own damn coffee. Besides, you can make it strong without it tasting like motor oil. Better'n me.
M: ((laughs)) They've accepted my new strong coffee down at the Life...actually got a thank you out of Maureen for it. More than she usually says though...Joanne and I had to patch her system again!
R: Again? ((frowns at him))
M: ((scoffs, dismissing it with a wave of his hand)) It's Maureen. What else is there to expect?
R: And it's you. Which means you'll always say yes.
M: ((blushes, lowering his eyes)) I still swoon when she walks through the door...but the fact that she's roped Joanne into being a slave to her every need is atrocious... ((his eyes trailing off to a sight in the distance))
R: Yeah. Now you know what we felt like when it happened to you. You're too good for that bullshit.
M: sighs Maureen has Joanne...Angel had Collins...you...well...had Mimi...I'm always alone...only with my camera...
R: ((blinks, aware that this is somehow turning into a serious conversation)) Mark... ((sighs)) You know, if you put that camera down sometime, people might actually become aware of the fact that you have a personality.
M: ((sighs as well, only half meeting Roger's gaze)) Sorry...I HAVE a personality...behind my camera...Fuck - no I don't...I have a camera...and I'm just the man behind it...I broke away once...dancing at the Life...on the tables...You said you liked it...
R: Yeah. ((smiles, remembering it)) Benny needs to piss you off more often, if that's what happens.
M: ((laughs, looking over at Roger, not used to seeing him smile)) You're smiling again. Because of me. Err...something I did ((covering quickly))
R: Happens sometimes. ((sighs)) That was a good Christmas.
M: You were in love. It was a good Christmas.
R: Yeah. ((sobers suddenly)) I was.
M: ((suddenly noticing the change in his roommate, Mark gets up from his chair and places one hand on the guitarist's shoulder)). In a way, we all were... that was Angel's doing
R: Yeah. ((looks over at him)) Anyway, my point was, you're better than this shit.
M: ((nods)) I know, but I always fall into it time and time again. No one's ever been there to keep me afloat, above it all.
R: Yeah, because you're too busy playing life preserver to the rest of us poor bastards. ((looks over at the coffee pot and grabs a mug, and a handful of stolen sugar packets))
M: ((raises the chipped mug he'd gotten for Roger)) Sorry, I'm only trying to help...but in the end I'm hurting myself
R: ((rolls his eyes)) So stop. The world won't end if you decide to be selfish for once.
M: ((nods, blushing a bit)) I should try...to express myself more...
R: ((pours himself a mug of coffee, breathing in the steam for a moment before responding)) Do, or do not. There is no try. ((waggles his eyebrows at Mark))
M: ((blushes more)) But the one I want...I'll wait forever for...
R: Maureen? You know that cause is lost, right? "Oh, Mark, you're such a great friend!" ... And you deserve better than her, anyway.
M: She wasn't who I meant Rog ((he mumbles, blankly scanning the newspaper in front of him))
R: ((sets his coffee down and moves behind Mark to lean over his shoulder)) Something you haven't been telling me?
M: ((blushes)) I...er...no...no no...you wouldn't...I mean they...they wouldn't...
R: ((blinks)) Wait... waitwaitwait. I wouldn't...?
M: ((whines softly)) Just forget I said anything! Please! ((he gets up, pushing past Roger and heads to his bedroom, flouncing on the bed and curling up into a ball - muffled cries can be heard))
R: ...Mark... ((follows as far as the bedroom door, pausing for a moment and taking a deep breath, then heading into the bedroom)) Mark. I'm sorry, I didn't know.
M: ((raises his head to look at Roger, his cheeks stained with tears)) You wouldn't have. I-It doesn't matter anyway ((starting to cry again)) You don't want...me. ((now sobbing))
R: ((instinctively goes to comfort Mark, feeling strange at this sudden role reversal, where Mark's not the one comforting him)) It's okay, it's okay... ((he leans over and pets Mark's shouders tentatively))
M: ((shudders and cries, leaning into Roger, the smell of Roger's aftershave wafting in his direction. He snuggles in closer, leaning now akwardly on the bed, but not caring. Roger's touches feel comforting, it's a nice change since he's usually the one doing the comforting))
R: (())pulls away from Mark just long enough to sit on the bed, and oulls him into his arms, stroking his back))
M: Thanks ((he says, a slight smile on his face, looking up at Roger))
R: You've done as much for me. ((is silent for a moment, deep in thought)) I'd tell you all this shit about how I'm the last person in the world you want to wait for, and how you deserve someone who's not... starts to say "dying", and decided against it ...sick... but you wouldn't listen, would you?
M: ((sighs)) I can't help who I ((wispers))...love. I've gotta take chances. This could be considered a risk, because you're "sick", but I need to do it. I needed to tell you - for me. I can't have regrets. Not anymore. No day but today. Angel taught us that.
R: ... Never thought you'd be one to scare the shit out of me like this... ((pulls Mark closer, so Mark's head is on his shoulder)) Fuck, I don't know anything anymore...
M: I didn't mean to scare you...but it's the truth, and I've never been more sure of anything... ((nuzzles Roger's shoulder))
R: ((whispers)) You know me. I'm scared of anything involving emotions. ((sounds just a little bitter about this))
M: ((nods)) I'm the one who detatches...not you ((kisses Roger's cheeck)) I'm scared too...I didn't think I...went this way...but I want this...you...I...you...I love you.
R: I've loved you for a long time, in that "friends" kind of way... And don't start crying agian, because I swear, this isn't the friends speech, okay?
M: ((nods, listens, but is getting quite a grab on Roger's shirt))
R: ((tries to be calm and rational, and not think about how good Mark feels in his arms, and why he didn't notice that before)) If this is anything, it's the "I don't know what the hell I'm doing" speech. I mean, my experience with guys is limited to... well, uh... Let's just say it's limited. All I know right know is I don't want to see you cry like that because of me. Ever.
M: ((nods, snuggling in more, not wanting to push Roger into something he's not ready for or doesn't want))
R: ((hesitates a moment, then kisses the top of Mark's head))
M: ((smiles and nuzzles Roger's neck))
R: Mmmm... This is... Okay, weird. This is weird. But nice. ((strokes down Mark's back))
M: ((smiles again, leaning in more and starts singly softly "Who do you think you are - barging in on me and my guitar?"))
R:((chuckles)) Hey, the guitar and I have a special bond. Our love is pure, and good, and if you want me, you've gotta share me with her.
M: ((leaps up and grabs the guitar, snuggling it in Roger's lap, before snuggling Roger again, grinning)) Done!
R: ((wraps an arm around Mark)) And I'll try and not get too jealous of your camera. ((pauses, then raises an eyebrow)) Do you actually fondle it in the middle of the night? I've always wondered.
M: ((smirks with a raised eyebrow)) Only when thinking of you, baby!
R: ((laughs and pulls Mark closer)) I haven't seen you this cheerful in a while... ((He feels guilty suddenly, for spending so much time in his own angst)) ...I was really clueless, huh?
M: ((smirks again, blushing)) Yes. But it's ok. Because now we're happy.
R: ((considers this for a moment, but somehow can't bring himself to argue, with Mark snuggled against him being warm and soft and nice))...I guess we are.
M: La Vie Boheme ((he wispers before kissing Roger gently on the lips))
R: ((stiffens a bit, then surprises himself by kissing back, pulling away long enough to whisper against Mark's lips)) To love...