Elphaba took Glinda's face in her hands.
"Doing this is going to be hard on me, but I fear it may be even harder on you. You only have so much to give Glinda. If you feel that this will be too much for you to take, please tell me. I can't bear the thought of you getting hurt by any of this."
Glinda took her friend's hands and looked long and hard into her eyes. "Elphaba, I can handle all of this, for as long as necessary. I will cry when I need too, or do whatever else I need to too be strong for you. You are my rock Elphie. I love you and I need you. I have never had a friendship, or any relationship that means more to me. So whatever you need, you take, whenever you need it. I have an infinite supply of love, and with that comes every thing else."
Elphaba stared at the lovely girl in front of her. "I think if I try to process what you just said, I may implode- but I think it meant" I'm fine let's go"
"That is exactly what it meant, my love, the rest we will deal with at another time."
Glinda gathered up the cloaks and Elphaba steeled herself for what was to come. Holding on to Glinda's hand Elphaba head down the sidewalk toward her field. Not to far away from the corner of it she stopped at an alleyway and stared down into the dimness. She let go of Glinda's hand and started to walk down, Glinda trailing behind her
"No" Elphie croaked "Please"
Glinda just nodded and stayed put, never letting Elphie out of her sight, although it was difficult because of the dimness. Elphaba took in everything, the look the smell, everything. When she reached the place where her attacked occurred, she forced her mind open, let the memory come. She could smell them, taste them feel the pain, just like it was happening all over.
"But it's not, and Glinda is right behind you" She thought. She started to tremble, her legs buckling underneath her, she feel onto the ground on the spot where she had been thrown three days earlier.
Glinda reluctantly watched her terrified friend walk a short way down the alley and stop. She couldn't see her face, but had little trouble imaging what it looked like. She stood so still, then started to tremble. Glinda was already walking down to her friend when she saw the thin legs start to falter. She ran and got to Elphie just in time to keep her head from hitting a crate as she fell."
"Elphie, Elphie, talk to me" She placed the trembling girls head on her chest and held her close" "It's over Elphie"
"What was I thinking?" She cried, "How could I have thought this would help. Coming back here, to do what?" She was angry. She pulled away from Glinda.
"All I did was put myself through it all over again- they were here right here all over again." She pounded the ground so hard Glinda thought she would break her thin hands.
"Elphaba, look at me" She took her hands "Look at me!" she commanded, to get the frantic girls attention. Elphaba looked into Glinda's eyes, pulling herself into them, and back into reality.
Glinda's voice softened "This is helping Elphie, you are getting out some serious anger- go on if you can- let it hurt- let it go, just like yesterday morning"
"Don't leave me here, Don't " Elphaba threw herself into the small woman's arms eyes wild with fear.
"Never, Here I am and here I shall stay."
She rocked her gently until she was a little more in control. "Elphaba, listen to me- Do you remember what you said the real Elphaba would do to her attackers?"
Elphie sat up and nodded.
"Good- then do it" Elphie just stared at her
"My guess is, you forced yourself to relive all that trauma before you were ready"
"I hate it when you get inside my head like this, you know that don't you?" Elphaba said, a tinge of fear still in her voice.
"I know that my love. Now-If you did it once you can do it again. Dredge up the memory and stop it before it before it happens- take control. Kick them in the…"
"Glinda!" Elphaba said, shocked
"In the zipper" she finished. "You need to take back the control- just do it"
Elphie was too frightened and weary to argue. "I'm assuming you have a plan?" She mumbled
" Of course I do don't be absurd. -But it's up to you Elphie, if you haven't the strength to manage this- then don't try, " I've got all the strength I need, right here she said hugging Glinda.
"Put your head on my lap and talk to me. Take me through the events, until you feel ready to change them- then do it, If you talk it through it may help you stay in control."
"I'm trusting you Glinda- if you think I can pull this off- then I will try. It can't end up any worse than it did" Glinda kissed her friend on the cheek and forehead. "Take anything you need from me my love, say whatever you want, feel my presence in your thoughts. You can do this."
Elphaba settled her head in Glinda's lap closing her eyes, feeling fingers gently stroking her hair.
"Take your time Elphie." she whispered, "The control is all yours"
Elphie took a deep breath. "I'm walking through the grass, thinking about the dew, and water in general and how I have defenses to protect myself from it all, except for tears. I am walking onto the sidewalk, thinking I have to hurry, cause you are waiting for me and you hate to wait,"
Glinda smiled and continued to stroke the raven head on her lap.
"Somebody's bumping in to me and grabbing my arm so I don't fall. He is not letting go and I am being dragged into this alley." Elphaba had stiffened, fear clouding her face. Glinda slipped her fingers into Elphie's and lightly stroked her cheek.
"They smell like ale and smoke. They are making fun of me. I'm pushed to the ground and fall hard. I try to get away, but rough hands grab me and smack my face."
Tears run down Glinda's face and she turns away, so they don't fall on the girl lying in her lap.
"One of them climbs on top of me."
"Take control Elphaba, you can do it" She squeezed her friends hand.
Suddenly Elphie's foot kicked at the air. "I kick him and he falls down, I get up and run away"
Elphaba, breathing heavily and sweating, opens her eyes. "It worked I can't believe it worked, I got away." She sat up looking at Glinda. "But what good is it, it's not what happened"
"No, it's not, but how do you feel?"
"Not as scared, I think,"
"Elphie, that's wonderful!" She hugged her friend.
"Glinda, I don't think this will change anything"
"Maybe not at first" Glinda agreed." but when you have a nightmare, you can possibly take control of it, change the outcome. And when you walk past here, you can focus on what you did to them, not what they did to you, and maybe, over time, this will help you to move on."
"For somebody who never studies, you certainly know your stuff" Elphaba said laughing.
Glinda managed to help Elphaba up and they walked out of the alley. Elphie was shaking slightly
"Care for a stroll in the grass," Glinda asked her. The green girl smiled and took her hand.
As they walked around the field, heading back to their dorm, Elphaba started to sing a happy melodic tune. Glinda was stunned and stopped walking staring at the girl beside her.
"I give you what I can, this is one of my few gifts, and I've kept it to myself for too long." Said Elphaba.
They walked back to the dorm, Elphie singing a bawdy pub tune, and laughing at Glinda's shocked expression.
When it started to rain, Glinda threw Elphie's cloak quickly over her and they ran the rest of the way. When they got safely inside, the burst out laughing for reasons neither one could pinpoint.
"Did you get wet?" Glinda asked trying to catch her breath
"Barely a drop of the wicked rain ravaged my delicate skin, thanks to your quick reflexes." Elphaba said, succumbing to a very unElphie-like giggle fit.
They made it up to their room, drawing some sideways glances along the way. They ran in and tumbled on to their beds, still laughing
"Where did all of this come from?" Glinda asked wiping tears from her eyes.
"Stress, I think, I guess we both needed to let off steam" Elphie said hiccuping.
How are you feeling Elphie?" Glinda asked when they had regained control of themselves. Elphaba was quite for a long while.
"I feel better about going back to classes tomorrow. I feel more in control of my emotions, even if I don't understand them, I feel stronger and I feel something that I can't define towards the small blonde girl who lives with me. How are you feeling?"
Glinda walked over and sat beside her friend, "The truth?"
"Of course, my sweet, always" Elphie said taking her hand
"I feel grateful that you are doing ok, I feel a little scared that you may be on emotional overload and may shut down, I feel a little worried that your injuries may be more serious than we know. I feel lucky that I have you in my life. And I feel emotionally and physically exhausted." They looked into each other's eyes for an eternity.
Elphaba, got up, "I'll run you a Gillkin Rose oil bath, if you will massage my aching body."
"Deal" said Glinda.
Glinda soaked while Elphie oiled. After they had cleaned up, and changed into nightclothes. Glinda tended to Elphie's bruises and slowly and gently massaged her neck and shoulders.
"Glinda, have you gotten many massages?" Elphie moaned slightly as Glinda worked the tension out of her shoulders
" Hundreds- actually almost every week until I came to Shiz. I haven't had time to find an appropriate masseuse here"
Elphie got up and straightened her clothes. "Teach me how. Someday soon, when I'm not so constrained physically, teach me
" Elphie, really"
"I'll give you what I can- this I'm sure I can."
"Ohhh what a lovely thought, those long soft fingers working knots out of my back, while that beautiful voice sings me a lovely song- Heavenly!" Elphie rolled her eyes.
"And speaking of that beautiful voice, where on earth did you learn that song?"
"Never mind, I can't give away all my secrets all at once"
She got up, stretched and yawned. "I'm ready for bed too.
They finished getting ready for bed and for the next day. Glinda spent way to long fussing with her wardrobe, so Elphie climbed into bed and watched her with amusement.
"Pick something already" Elphie laughed.
"Fine" Glinda huffed and put three outfits on her chair. "I'll choose tomorrow"
She went over and turned of the light, ready to crawl into her bed.
"Glinda, I need a favor"
"Anything Elphie, what do you need?"
"You" she said unsteadily "I'm still a little shaky from this evening and I'm a little afraid to go to sleep. I know that sounds childish, but… "
Glinda crawled into bed beside Elphie and wrapped her arms around her snuggling into her shoulder.
"Better?" Glinda asked sleepily
"Much- and Glinda, I may be very close to emotional overload, but I'm going to try and sort this through and we need to talk it out, because I have to figure out what this means for me."
" We will sweetie, there's no hurry, there is no need to rush anything, You've experienced some strong, and raw emotions over the past few days. You need to heal. I'm not going anywhere. And contrary to popular belief, I am a very patient person."
Elphie sighed heavily "I do care about you Glinda, more than I ever have for anyone. I just wish I knew what that meant."
"Elphie I know you care about me, I can feel it, even now. So do not push yourself to fast. Ok?"
" Ok, I'll try" sighed Elphie.
"I love you Elphie, sleep well."
"I know you do, my sweet" She said kissing her roomies blonde tresses. Wishing she understood what it was she felt.