A morning walk for the goodest boy.
Ok, so this went from a character dedication chapter to a chapter with a little bit of character dedication :/
A thin sliver of moonlight reached through the gaps between the blinds, painting the wall above the desk a silky white as Chloe rolled and flipped and stretched on top of her sheets with futility. She rolled her eyes and huffed, before tossing herself to her front, her hands under her thighs.
Why can't I go to sleep? She thought.
She rolled again, bending her left knee and resting it against the wall. She pulled her pillow and dropped it to the ground and she tucked one foot under her sheet and-
She bolted from her bed and shook her hands, wiggled her fingers, flexed her heels. Why can she be so mellow before bed, but as soon as her head touches the fabric of the pillow, her brain goes "oh hey Chloe, have you ever thought about the inner workings of the universe and how many ice cream flavours exist? Have you Chloe? HAVE YOU?!"
Fuck ADHD.
No amount of caffeine-less days, green teas, meditations, soothing soaks in the hot tub, or literally ANYTHING would help her sleep. Not even the…private activities…that she performed alone were of any help to her. She rubbed either side of her neck with her hands and sighed to the ceiling, before grinning. She grinned at the memory of her in the shower, roughly a year ago, thinking that she was entirely alone in the apartment, save for Thor snoozing on the sofa. Her Mom was overseas with TerraSave, and Chris was in the gym. Except he hadn't been down there for as long as she thought. While he himself hadn't seen anything given the angle of the wall in the bathroom, she had no idea that Chris had literally stepped into the bathroom as she…
She looked to the floor and cringed, wiggling her toes into the rug.
She sat in her room, nothing more than a pink towel wrapped around her body, her flaming red hair dangling in thick, damp strands over her face. She wanted the floor of her bedroom to crumble and decay into a dark abyss and devour her into the lightless void. Fourteen. She was fourteen and she…she got caught. She feared so much that Uncle Chris was gonna kill her. Was she even allowed to be doing that at that age?
She pulled on some long pyjamas and stepped into her slippers as she heard a knock at her door.
"Hey, pebble? Can we have a chat?"
Uncle Chris.
She flicked the handle of the door and briskly stepped to her window, grabbing her glass of water by her bedside.
"You ok, Chloe?" he asked. He didn't close the door behind him; there was no Claire to shield this conversation from. Chloe slowly poured the water over her window plants.
"Plants 42 and 43 need watering." She lied. He laughed at her common tendency to focus her attention elsewhere in her times of awkwardness.
"Of all names for your plants that you could've picked. I told you about the Plant 42 I encountered in 1998, right? And Plant 43 that your mom dealt with in Raccoon City?"
"Many times," Chloe answered abruptly. "I only numbered them because coming up with names got too tedious." She watched little aloe Plant 42's soil bubble and pop as the soil saturated, and she turned her attention to Plant 43, a little indoor ivy plant, slowly emptying the glass over it.
"Look. Chloe. What you were doing in the shower earlier…" Chris trailed off, and Chloe clamped her eyes tightly shut, bracing for his anger.
"There's no shame in masturbation, Chloe. None at all. I'm not angry, I'm not shocked, I'm not surprised. We're all human, we all do it."
Chloe tried to suppress the image of Chris jerking off in the shower, and succeeded in keeping the disturbing image at bay. No fucking way in hell was she imagining her uncle stark naked with his dick in his hand. He probably had a micro peepee anyway, she thought. Would pair well with his inflated ego.
"I just wanted you to know that. No one is going to punish you or think that you're disgusting. Never feel embarrassed by a healthy and simple human activity." With that Chloe heard her door click closed, and Chris was gone. His words certainly made her feel better, made her feel more comfortable. But it didn't stop her from being consumed by the embarrassment of Chris hearing her voice echo off the tiled walls.
She scrunched her nose at the memory and nodded. It had indeed helped her feel comfortable about it, she had never felt bad about it since. Though she pleaded with him to not tell her mom of her little moment. And as far as she was aware, he had kept his word. Maybe, just maybe they may be able to fix their relationship.
But for now, the Summer heat had dried out her room and parched her throat. She needed a sip of water, and for once she hadn't brought a glass through. She looked at Thor, asleep on the end of her bed, contorted with his feet skyward, his tongue drooping over his fangs. Lucky dog, she thought miserably. He got to sleep whenever the hell he wanted. Oh how she wished for the simple dog's life!
She stepped out into the dark apartment, the grandmother clock ticking and tocking to her left, and she listened out for the noises of life. No sound of Mom 'enjoying herself', Chloe pondered. She always felt awkward about hearing her Mom mess with herself, but she often wondered how Chris must've felt hearing his little sister moan like she doesn't give a fuck about who may be hearing it all. As Chris had said last year, there's no shame. Maybe he had told her mom that when she was her age, however long ago that was.
She left the lights off as she crept through the small doorway opposite her own into the kitchen. The window was slightly open, and she frowned. She knew the complex was relatively secure but the idea that an otherwise easily accessible window was open at night unnerved her. She tiptoed to reach the handle, but voices outside made her retreat quickly and crouch below the sink's level.
"You know full well that you interrupted me earlier. You were fucking listening in."
"I know I was, and I know I interrupted. You can't tell her, Chris. And I will do everything in my power to stop you from telling her."
Chloe held herself upright on her knees, her chin on the sink's edge. What time was it? Why were they still awake?
"Let me tell her, Claire."
"No. You can't. She can't know."
I can't know what, Chloe thought. Was this not about Chris being gay?
"You need to understand, Chris. We'd be so fucked if she ever found out. And she'd hate you more than me."
"Are you telling her that she hates me, Claire? Because to me it seems you can't seem to make your mind up as to whether she hates me or not."
"I don't know which scares me more. The trouble we'd be in, the scandal, or her hating me." Clearly her mother was trying to divert to get her own point across.
"Don't ignore me." And Chris knew all too well that she was diverting it. "She definitely doesn't hate you, Claire. If anything it is me that she hates. But why are you telling her from one day to the next that I hate her? I don't! I fucking love her, Claire! I adore her! She means so much to me, you both do and you fucking know it!"
"I can't bear to feel hatred from my baby girl, Chris…"
"Oh cry me a goddamn river, Claire, for the love of God!"
"I told her that you don't hate her when I picked her up from school."
"But on other days you tell her that I do?! Let me tell her the truth!"
"No."
"Claire." Chloe heard Chris inhale slowly, and his voice lowered to a growl. "One day I am going to tell her, and you will NOT fucking stop me."
"Fine." Chloe heard Mom sneer. "Tell her. But you or her may disappear. I may have to make it so. Or both of you, I don't care."
"Are you threatening to kill me? Threatening to kill Chloe?"
"If that's what you think I'm implying-"
"Listen to yourself, Claire! What's happened to you?! Why are you so cold?! We all used to be so close! And now you're literally threatening to have me killed, to have Chloe killed?! For fuck's sake, none of this is her fault!"
Chloe twisted and slunk against the counter below the sink, her knees to her chest. What possibly could be so bad of her finding out that her own Momma-Bear would literally have her and her uncle killed off? Scandal? Trouble? She felt sick. She loved her mother, but to hear her talking so unemotionally and with ice in her veins to Chris scared her. It was so out of character for her mom.
"What happened to us, Claire? We used to be close too. What's happened to you? Is it the t-Phobos?"
"I'm not talking to you anymore, Chris. This conversation has ended already."
Chloe heard one of the balcony chairs slide, and the door opened. She threw herself into the corner by the larger door frame, and prayed that whoever it was didn't come into the kitchen. Sure enough she watched her mom enter her own room and close the door; she didn't notice Chloe peering around the door frame. She stood up and crept closer to the balcony door, where Chris still sat, a cigarette pinched in the fingers of one hand, the fingers of his other hand pinching the bridge of his nose, his eyes closed.
She felt deep pity for him. Even by her own standard she believed that her mom had spoken to him like he was lower than garbage. Even she held him in higher regard to that. She wanted to comfort him, but she knew that she was never meant to hear that conversation. Did her mom really threaten to have them both killed off? Or "disappear", as she so subtly put it? What was so secret that Chloe wasn't meant to know? Was Chris not gay after all? She came to that conclusion since she had never seen Chris bring a woman home. She thought that it explained why he didn't have a wife and his own kids. Was that not his big super-secret secret? She watched Chris take a shaky breath of his cigarette before turning on her heels. Her stomach felt too full for a glass of water anyway.
"Where are we going, Mom?"
"Home. Uncle Chris wanted to be home before us."
"Why?"
"Because he wanted to give you a really good birthday present."
"Ooooh, what is it?"
"I don't know, he didn't tell me."
Chloe squealed with excitement from the back seat of the car, kicking the seat in front. She could kick this one. It wasn't the driver's seat. Uncle Chris was back! What did Uncle Chris want to give her? Why did Uncle Chris want to be home first? She envisioned lots of balloons and cake and little platters of food, but she knew Chris was bad at making sandwiches and carrot sticks with the sour cream dip. And he definitely can't bake a cake.
The car entered the familiar parking lot, and Chloe rattled the door handle like her life depended on it.
"Woah Chloe calm down you're gonna break it!" Claire laughed. Chloe plopped herself back in her seat and impatiently waited for the door to be opened. Her mom had barely pulled it before Chloe threw herself out and ran through the double doors, and frantically slapped the elevator buttons.
"No Chloe, come on, use the stairs!"
"But I don't wanna use the stairs!" Chloe whined. Her mom groaned, but didn't try to fight her. Once the elevator had reached their floor she squeezed between the mirrored panels, and ran into the apartment door palms first, giggling. She knocked with both knuckles and shouted for Chris, but it was her mom who unlocked the door and opened it.
Chloe ran in, but not to a scene of balloons or cake or food. It didn't phase her, seeing Uncle Chris for the first time in three weeks was enough to make up for any birthday bash. She ran into his waiting arms and jumped, hanging from his neck and knocking them both backwards.
"Woah woah, Chloe! Chill! You're not as small as you used to be!" He laughed, and she laughed with him. "God, how are you ten, girl?!"
"God, she has grown hasn't she?" A voice from Chloe's right made itself known. She looked over and gasped.
"Dion!" she cried, and she ran over to his waiting hand, "High five!"
"High five, Chloe! Ten years old, huh?" He looked up to Claire, and she nodded at him.
"Canine." Claire spoke, deadpan.
"Claire." He nodded back. Chloe watched her mom enter the kitchen amid the voices of Chris and Dion, but her mom suddenly sprung a leg into the air before twisting back around.
"Oh Chris, no, no please don't tell me that this is Chloe's birthday present?!"
The two Hound Wolf Squad men erupted with laughter.
"Hey I told ya she'd react like that!" Dion exclaimed, and Chris grinned at Claire's annoyed expression.
"What is it?! What is it?!" Chloe shouted, and Dion shushed her, bobbing his hands.
"Hey, keep your voice down ok? You have to be calm and gentle."
Chris pointed to the floor by his feet and gestured for Chloe to sit down. She did as she was told, even though sitting statue still was nearly impossible for her right now, and he pointed at his own eyes, before pointing at hers. She closed them tightly and waited. And waited and waited and she was only waiting for a few seconds but it felt like aaaaaaaages.
"Okay, Chloe. Happy birthday!" Chris cheered. Chloe opened her eyes to…well…certainly a sight, and she wanted to squeal loudly, but she did a good job being quiet instead, like she was told. Right there, plodding about in front of a cross legged Uncle Chris, was the sweetest, fluffiest, cutest little puppy she had EVER seen. His fur was brown with patches of black, and his ears hung lazily either side of his head. His paws were unproportionately big for his body.
"Canine's squad dogs had a litter. German Shepherd and Japanese Akita cross, or a Shepkita. I thought that maybe," Chris looked up at Claire, "Because you can't have a human sister or brother anymore, you could have a fluffy brother instead. He can keep you company."
Chloe leant forward and held her hand out, just like Dion had shown her when she met his squad dogs, and sure enough the little puppy came bounding over. She giggled through her nose as he pawed her hand, and he softly chewed her fingers with his tiny needle-like teeth. It didn't hurt, if anything it tickled. The puppy locked eyes with her, and pounced on her face, smothering her with a tiny tongue and that puppy breath that she had heard so many of her friends talk about.
"You've gotta name him, Chloe, we can't do it for you." Chris smiled. She wasted no time.
"Thor."
"Thor? From Avengers?" Dion asked.
"Yup. 'Coz he's awesome." Chloe confirmed. She lifted the puppy onto his back legs, gently grasping his front paws. "Your name is Thor, ok? Let's be best friends!"
Chloe stood outside Chris' bedroom door, already dressed in a cut Iron Maiden tee, red jeggings and a pair of black Converse high tops. She knocked, and waited. She had already peered into her mom's room, and she was in bed, still asleep. It was what Chloe wanted. After no response, she knocked again, a little louder. She heard a grunt from the depths of the room; her signal that she was allowed to enter.
"It's me." she declared, leaning her head around the door. Chris grunted again and patted the empty space next to him. She approached his bed and sat on the edge of the mattress, glancing sideways at him. Chris looked tired as he lay there, his eyes to the ceiling. He was in nothing but black cotton shorts and he lay on the sheets; probably too warm under the covers for him again.
Neither Redfield spoke. Chloe knew that Claire's words from last night were playing on his mind, but she couldn't tell him that she knew it. She couldn't talk about it.
"I…" Chloe began, and she licked her dry lips, "I'm taking Thor out for a walk. I wanted to ask if you wanna come along."
Chris kept his eyes to the ceiling and sighed. They still sat there in the suffocating silence, each one of them held captive by their own thoughts. Chloe's mind flicked from one thought to another; the thought of a Saturday morning walk with her uncle and dog, but also the thought of their rocky relationship. Especially after what she heard last night, she had decided that she was wholeheartedly determined to try and meet at his level, to try and repair the scraps of their relationship, to stitch the tattered and torn swatches back up with fine, intricate threads to rebuild that Redfield tapestry which once hung pridefully between the trio.
She wanted to discard their differences, she yearned to destroy their unexplained anger.
She wanted back the uncle that herself as a little girl loved and adored so much.
Her thoughts were shattered as her arm was grabbed, and she fell backwards. If it wasn't for Chris' other hand cupping the back of her head, she would've smacked her head on the wall.
"Sorry." Chris mumbled. She shuffled her head to the pillow and frowned at him.
"I haven't done this in years." Chloe giggled, but Chris placed a finger to her lips.
"Claire is probably still asleep, keep your voice down." whispered Chris, and Chloe nodded in understanding.
"Wanna come for a walk?" she whispered back, repeating her offer. Chris hooked his big arm around the back of her neck and planted a kiss on her forehead. She felt a crackle of shock in her body, and her crawlies teased her. It hadn't happened for years, and she was torn between becoming angry with him or accepting it. She noticed a faint smell on this spare pillow, and her eyebrows twitched.
"Make me a coffee in my Thermos and I'll get dressed," he replied, "literally take me a few minutes."
Chloe tapped his arm, and he freed her.
"One or two scoops?"
"Pod I think this morning, I feel like I'm gonna need it."
Chloe was pouring the liquid into the Thermos as Chris paced to the bathroom; she had made it as perfectly as she could manage at this time on a Saturday morning with a gut still full of a stacked cheeseburger and pulled beef coated fries in a sweet hickory whiskey sauce. She smirked wryly; her mother gave her nothing but dagger eyes whilst she shared the fries with Chris and begged him for the sliced pickles from his own burger, and jokingly berating her mom for taking a healthy option. She blinked and stopped the hot water near the rim of the cup.
Coffee.
She seemed to have a way with coffee; everyone complimented her on her beverage making. She pressed her lips together and shrugged to herself. Isn't coffee just coffee, though? She screwed the lid onto Chris' cup and sniffed. The smell of coffee was tantalising to her nostrils, but that faint scent on the pillow still had her thinking, perhaps far too much. Maybe it was just an olfactory hallucination. Yeah. Maybe.
She heard the sound of the toilet flushing, the sink running, and then finally the sound of Chris using his deodorant. He was nearly ready, no doubt he'll slip his sneakers on and he'll be good to go. She turned and deliberately locked eyes with Thor, patiently waiting in the large doorway to the living room with his head tilted cutely to the side.
"You need to be quiet, boy, ok?" She slowly paced to the corner of the kitchen, and as she reached for his leash off the wall hook, his tail began sweeping the tiles. "Walkies."
Thor obeyed her wishes, bouncing and prancing in silence, only his claws made any noise as they clattered under his paws. The bathroom door opened, Chris kicked his black sneakers on, and they made for the door, but not before Chloe handed the leash to Chris, and ran back to her room. She lightly lifted the red denim jacket that she was gifted and slipped it onto her back. Heading back out Chloe moved to close the apartment door. Briefly, so very briefly, she saw her mother's bedroom door begin to open; the handle had lowered and disappeared inward into the room.
Jesus.
Chloe didn't expect the first ten minutes to be nothing more than birds chirping, Thor panting and Chris slurping his coffee. Okay, so maybe she did expect it. This was them now. Their waning relationship. She held a hand out to Chris' cup, and he wordlessly passed it to her as he took another hit of his cigarette. She sipped the cup, caring not for the taste of the nicotine that he had left on there. God she wanted one so badly…
"What's the plan?" Chris asked, smoke leaving his mouth and nostrils. Chloe licked her lips of the coffee and handed it back to him.
"I don't know. It's already too warm to take him to the dog park." she replied. She saw him glance her up and down and he coughed.
"Well you would choose to wear all of that…" her uncle grumbled.
"Says the middle aged man all in black?" Chloe raised an eyebrow at him and twisted her lips. She felt it awkward that he too wore an Iron Maiden t-shirt underneath his black hoodie, emblazoned on the back with the Hound Wolf Squad's logo, but maybe it was his little way of trying to reconnect with her. After all, it was him who introduced her to the band, and her very first gig with only him was Iron Maiden at their city's arena; every other gig had involved Claire. They were seated quite far back in the stalls, but they still had a great view of the stage, and it didn't impede Chloe's fun or Chris' enjoyment. She remembered that before the support band had come on, a man in the row behind them leant forward, asking Chris if this was his "daughter's first concert." She of course laughed and dismissed the man's thoughts; it wasn't her first concert, nor was she Chris' daughter. Chris had grinned but said nothing.
They had both sang loudly to Run To The Hills, they both quoted Barry Clayton at the start of The Number Of The Beast, they had laughed and hugged to Chris' dumb moment during Bring Your Daughter To The Slaughter. He didn't mean to punch her in the head, he only meant to put his arm over her shoulder, he didn't know that she was going to hop up a little as the intro started. He had fully embraced her as she sang through tears to Fear Of The Dark. She didn't know why the song made her cry, it wasn't like she had never heard it before.
She blinked rapidly and looked at Chris.
"We'll take Thor through the park. The sun is still low, and there are lots of trees there for shade." Chloe said, and Chris waved his cigarette at her.
"Sounds like a plan, I might even grab another coffee if the park café is open already."
Chloe watched him smoke, and pondered asking him about that scent in his room. A pigeon flew low to the road and swooped over an incoming yellow taxi.
"Chris?"
"Hmm?"
"Your pillow smelled like Mom's perfume. Why?" Chloe watched Chris' eyes flick about, and he took a few seconds to answer her question.
"Probably in a similar way that it now smells of your perfume."
"What do you mean?"
"She occasionally comes into my room and lies on my bed if she's had a nightmare. She's done it since she was a kid."
"But she wasn't there this morning."
"No, but she was the night before. I'm washing my sheets later today anyway."
The pair fell silent again, and Chloe looked down at Thor, his ears were folded back, keen on listening to their voices. They turned right and made over the crosswalk, and through the fancy gates into their local park, lined all the way around its vast expanse with trees. Immediately on the left was the huge play park with its swings, climbing frame and sandpit. To the far right of it all was a powder blue concrete paddling pool, but all of Chloe's childhood memories of that pool involved dead floating wasps and dirty band aids. There were also some monkey bars, and Chloe shuddered.
"Hey hold on tight, Chloe, I've got a work call."
"But…ngh Uncle Chris…" Chloe dangled from the monkey bars as Chris brought his phone to his ear, his other hand hovering by her legs.
"Hello?...Yeah…A confirmed lead? Where?...Europe?...Is this that Miranda person?..."
"Uncle Chris…" Chloe's fingers were turning white inside her pink woollen gloves and burned from maintaining a grip on the cold, winter battered metal. She tried to wiggle them back on, and one woolly gloved hand slid off.
"Keep an eye on the target, we don't know what she's capable of yet."
"Uncle Chris…" Chloe swung her arm back up, but kept missing the bar, and after the fourth attempt her momentum took her body too far.
"We move out tomorrow, get the-" Chloe felt Uncle Chris' arm coil rapidly around her waist, but it only offset her, and she spun over his elbow, landing on the poured rubber ground below. She heard a sickening crunch and a searing, agonising pain licked greedily at her wrist and forearm. Chris appeared in front of her, dropping his phone to the floor, the call symbol still alive on the screen.
"Fuck! Chloe, I'm so sorry!" He shook his hands, quickly looking around as Chloe stared at her misshapen arm underneath her puffy pink winter jacket. It hurt, but she didn't cry; she was too busy trying to process what had just happened.
"Chloe, I…" He picked up his phone, "Lobo, I need to call you back." He hung up and slipped his phone into his big black coat, the one that Chloe always thought felt itchy.
"Why didn't you catch me, Uncle Chris?" Chloe uttered, monotone and without emotion. Not even her crawlies were plaguing her. "Why do I feel so empty in my head?"
"You're in shock, little pebble, oh my God I'm so sorry."
He gently touched her elbow and looked into her eyes.
"Does it hurt here?" He asked. Chloe shook her head. He slipped his jacket off, revealing his black turtleneck top, and with a delicate touch Chloe never thought him capable of, he slipped it painlessly under her arm, tying the sleeves around her neck.
"Gotta take you to the hospital, ok? God your mom is gonna kill me."
"Is my arm broken?"
"Uh…yeah. It's broken."
"Do I get a cast like Janine?"
"You probably will."
"Then I want a red one."
Chris looked sadly into her eyes, and tucked a stray strand of red hair back into her beanie hat.
"You're a brave girl, Chloe. A very brave girl."
"Am I a Redfield, Uncle Chris?"
"I've never forgiven myself for that." Chris spoke. Chloe shook her head and looked at her uncle. He sat on a lacquered wooden bench a little ways behind her, lazily smoking, his eyes slowly passing over the empty play park. His Thermos leant at an angle between his thighs.
"Why not." Chloe mumbled. She didn't say it as a question. She didn't care what his reason for his lack of self forgiveness was, but she wanted to continue some variety of a conversation.
"I should've been more careful. I shouldn't have been distracted." Chris admitted to her, and she slowly walked over to him, perching herself next to him. She fumbled with her jacket collar and leant back against the wood.
"But you had a work call. And without that call, Rose would never have been saved."
"That's no excuse for lack of attention, Chloe. You broke your arm because of me."
"I don't care." Chloe spat, "I don't care that you don't forgive yourself. But I forgive you. Isn't that enough reason for you to forgive yourself?"
"Well, you're certainly more forgiving than your mother, that's for damn sure."
"It was an accident, I wore a kick ass cast for a few weeks and then I was fine. My arm is fine. Mom shouldn't be mad about it anymore, she needs to let it go."
"Yeah well sometimes she decides to not let things go. And for the most part, I don't blame her."
Chloe chewed on his words.
"What do you mean by that?"
Chris lit up a fresh cigarette and hovered it in the air near his lips, Chloe looked at it, folding her own lips. He'll shoot me if he knew, she thought.
"You know I had bad PTSD, in 2009. She told you about it, but…"
"But?"
"She never told you the full extent. But you'd hate me if I told you." Chris rolled his eyes to the sky in thought. "Well, hate me more than she says you do."
He glanced at his watch, then around the park before gesturing at Thor.
"It's off-leash hours, might as well let him run."
Chloe gripped the leash in her hand, and met Thor's big hazel eyes. Boy knew it was off-leash hours. She looked around for signs of other people or dog walkers, and unclipped the leash from his harness. He took off like a bat out of hell, running in wide arcs, his tongue flopping comically against his jowls.
"Not the flowers, boy!" Chloe shouted at him. He skidded to a halt in front of a colourful flower bed, and shoved his wet nose into the petals.
"I treated Claire like shit. I was an alcoholic," Chris explained, "Just one of the many things on my list of regrets."
"You attacked Mom a few times." Chloe spoke, nonchalant. Chris choked on his cigarette and turned to her, wide eyed. Chloe met those wide eyes with hers.
"She told me." Her voice was flat. Chris remembered to breathe, and he turned away, taking another hit of his cigarette, a long drawn out breath.
"How much did she tell you?" Chris asked finally.
"She told me you attacked her. Hit her. Punched and kicked her. She told me she tried to kill herself because she couldn't cope. But I have my own thoughts on it all."
The two listened to the leaves sighing in the wind, to birds singing their morning song. Chris still didn't look at her.
"My thoughts are this. Why didn't Mom help you? I know what line of work you do. I can only imagine how stressful and mentally taxing fighting bioterrorism and hordes of the undead can be. Why didn't she do more to help you?"
"She did try to help me, and I did nothing but throw her help back in her face."
"I'm not condoning your actions, but you're not the one who has raised a hand to me. Not ever." Chloe pulled at the hem of her red jacket and gazed into the distance, "Must be a Redfield thing."
Chris twisted in his seat to face her.
"Say again?"
"I said you're not the one who has raised a hand to me."
"When-"
"A few times." Chloe confessed, as if it was a perfectly normal aspect of growing up.
Thor caught sight of a pigeon landing, and bolted for it. The bird however was too clever for the big boy, and it flew away safely.
"Do you hate me, Chris?" Chloe asked.
"No." Chris answered without hesitation.
"In the cemetery yesterday, Mom told me that you didn't hate me. But literally fifteen minutes later in the car ride home she told me that you hate me."
"I've never hated you. It's strange, you know?" Chris lit up yet another cigarette, "she always tells me different from one day to the other. One day apparently you hate me, and the next day you don't."
"Why though? I've been frustrated with you, Chris, I'm gonna admit it, I've had moments when I felt that I should've hated you, but I never truly have."
"I don't know why she does it, but it's starting to fucking irritate me." grumbled Chris. "Don't get me wrong, there's been times when I've wanted to, I don't know, lock you in your room or something, but I don't hate you. If your mom tells you otherwise, ignore her. If you want the truth, then ask me. Chinese whispers are dangerous things."
Chloe laughed, a loud, open mouth teen cackle, and she watched Chris raise an eyebrow at her.
"Lock me in my room? How edgy! I'm petrified! Shaking in my Converse, even!" she giggled, waving her feet in the air. Chris smiled, but it seemed…empty.
"The truth…" Chris whispered. Chris shuffled to her, and she pretended to be offended by the cigarette in close proximity to her. He pulled her into his side and patted her above the waist.
"I'm not gay, by the way."
Chloe blinked and looked at his smirking face, though he was smirking at the trees.
"Wait, you're not?"
"No, I'm about as straight as a breadstick!"
"Oh…" Chloe shuffled uncomfortably. She revealed to him last night that she was bisexual, thinking that he was sharing his sexual orientation with her. She didn't know what words to use now.
"I'm not angry with what you told me yesterday, pebble. If you're happy then I'm happy."
Chloe could feel Chris' heart beating, so powerful and heavy as it was. What's his deal? Is he ok?
"What I wanted to tell you last night, this secret…"
"Yeah?" Chloe gazed at his face, and she watched the lump in his throat, just like last night before he was about to reveal this secret.
"It's that I'm-"
Chris' phone began to ring, and he cursed loudly. He pulled his phone from his pants, and he breathed in sharply as he stood up.
"Claire…What?! What the fuck?! Cl-...No, Claire, listen…You've gotta be kidding! The hell is up with you?!...No you fucking listen!...Claire, listen to me, shut up and listen-" Chris looked at his screen, and cursed again. He paced over to the trash can by the bench and slammed his fist onto it, dropping another profanity.
"Chris?" Chloe asked. She was genuinely worried for him. She knew that last night's conversation with Claire had frustrated him, and whatever just happened now had done the same. She had seen him mad, or she thought she had. Until now. His chest rose and sank greatly, his teeth were gritted, and Chloe saw that his eyes looked glassy. Thor came running over and skidded into Chris' leg, pawing at him, but Chris dismissed him with a gentle push. Thor tried to lick his hand, but Chris pushed him away again.
"Go home, Chloe." Chris didn't look at her.
"What's happened? Does Mom want me home?"
"It's not that. Just go home."
"But I'm walking Thor."
"Then walk him home."
"Chris what's going on?"
Chris stood up straight and postured in front of her.
"Go. Home."
"Chris…
"NOW." He didn't shout, he simply raised his voice, there was a difference.
"I'm not going home without you, Uncle Chris."
"Yes you are! GO!" Chris suddenly roared, pointing to the gates. The flicker of warmth in his eyes that Chloe thought she had help expose was now gone, there was nothing but a chill left. Chloe's expression remained the same, but her heart sank. She clipped Thor's leash back onto his harness and began towards the gates, and for the first time today her crawlies kicked in in their bad way, not like their nice way earlier in Chris' room. She turned to see the image of her uncle, seemingly defeated, hunched again over the trash can, massaging his nose bridge with his fingers. Just like in the small hours last night.
"I told you that it would never work, Chris. We'll never fix it." she shouted over to him, but he didn't heed her.
She stepped to walk away, but Thor pulled on the leash, his ears pricked up, and he stared at Chris, his hackles bunched up on his shoulders. She gave the leash a tug, and Thor trailed behind her. She kept her head down with her shoulders hunched, almost reminiscent of her uncle right now.
She knew it. She knew the pleasantries wouldn't last! She shoved her hands sulkily into her pockets, but something in her right pocket caught her attention. She grabbed the mystery object and held it to her eye level.
A cigarette.
She hadn't put it there, and the jacket was new yesterday. Or did she sneak it out of Chris' packet and into the pocket at some point? She couldn't remember. She pinched it between her lips and shrugged; no lighter of course. She'll suck on the filter until she gets home. She slid her hands back into her pockets, but something else had eluded her. Some cold and metallic. She pulled this equally mysterious object from her pocket and froze.
The sun sparkled on the brass surface, the corners slightly rounded, the top ever so gently curved. She flicked it open, watching the little flame come alive, and closed it again, extinguishing the flame.
Huh.
She flicked the lid again, and the flame reappeared. She felt Thor pull again on the leash, and she bound her hand with the thick rope and resumed walking. Lighting up the cigarette, she inhaled that first enticing taste of the nicotine, before closing the zippo and motioning to slip it back into her pocket. But her fingers felt embossing on the opposite side of the case. She turned it about in her palm and accidentally bumped into the big boy as the detail on the case hit her eyes.
Intricately embossed into the brass was the Hound Wolf Squad's logo.
Chloe entered the apartment complex via the side gate into the private yard, and she glanced up to the balcony of her apartment. She continued to glance up as she approached the building, only fleetingly catching one of the resident kids on the swing to her right.
"Mom?!" Chloe shouted up, and she let go of Thor's leash. No one came into view.
"Mom!" She shouted again. The door was open, she could see it now but still no sign of her mom.
"CLAIRE!"
Within seconds, her mother appeared on the balcony at speed, anger etched into her features.
"That's Mom to you, Chloe May!" her mother shouted back, and Chloe shrugged.
"Well you didn't answer the first two times I shouted for you! But you expect everyone else to answer YOU on the first go?!" Chloe really didn't want to be or sound aggravated, nor did she want to aggravate Claire, but she couldn't shake the feeling that Chris' sudden mood and change in demeanour was Mom's doing. It was her fault. She pointed at Thor. "Can you let him in?"
Claire groaned and moved to unlock the fire gate (was it meant to be locked, anyway?), and Chloe opened the little gate by the base of the stairs. She regained the leash, tucked the loose end into his harness and let him run up the metal steps, and he disappeared from view.
Behind her, she heard the sound of the swing's metallic squeaking cease, and quick footsteps, before a weight pressed into her back and small arms appeared around her waist. Chloe sighed and patted the hand on her belly.
"Morning Rose."
"Mooooorning Chloe!" came the voice into her back. Chloe turned around and looked down to the soft face of Rosemary Winters, one of the few kids besides her in the complex.
"What's wrong? You look sad." Rose pouted, and Chloe twisted her lips before nodding over to the large pirate ship playset. She climbed under the wooden bar with ease onto the deck, while Rose scrambled behind her. Chloe twisted and heaved Rose up by the arm before leaning against the wood walls. Rose crawled to the other side of her and mirrored Chloe's seating position.
"So what's up, Chloe?"
"Uh, I don't know, family issues?" Chloe shrugged. She tilted her head back against the wood to check the balcony, but Mom was gone again.
"Chris?"
"Maybe."
"He's a nice guy." Rose stated, but Chloe scoffed.
"He's a jerk." It was an automatic response to a compliment about him. Maybe he's only being a jerk right now because of Claire. What did she say on the phone to him?
"He's a nice dad model for you."
"Yeah, well, he keeps trying to act like he is my dad. But he's not. My dad is dead."
"Mine too." Rose sighed, gazing up into the blue sky. She adjusted her baseball cap over her fair hair. "I don't remember my dad."
"I don't remember mine. But I had a thought recently," Chloe said, "I don't ever remember meeting Corey's dad."
"Maybe Claire didn't want you to meet him right away?"
"But that doesn't make sense at all! Why wait-" Chloe stopped. If her mom had two miscarriages and a stillbirth with the same guy, exactly how long was she supposedly going to wait to introduce them? But Rose more than likely didn't know about the miscarriages, and she was probably far too young to remember any stories. She's only going to be turning eight years old in August, hell, she wasn't even a thought back in 2017. Rose patiently waited for Chloe to continue.
"I've never seen any photos of my dad. Or Corey's dad. It's weird. There's load of baby photos of me, a few of Mom and Chris from when they were kids, one or two of Granny and Grandpa Redfield, even one from their wedding day, back when Mom was eleven, I think, but none of my dad or anyone else."
"Maybe your mom split up with your dad before you were born?" Rose suggested, but Chloe shook her head.
"Mom even has two rings. One was Granny's engagement ring, and the other, I'm not sure. I think Chris once said that it was from Dad, but the stones in her ring match the stones in this." She poked at the hollow heart with tiny stones resting on her sternum. "But then also it was apparently Chris who got it for me when I was a baby, so I don't know if he got it as a tribute to my dad, like a memento. I never hear them talking about mine or Corey's dad either."
Chloe slid down onto her back and rotated her body, staring into the sky. Rose, with her knees by her chest, watched Chloe curiously, before lying next to her. In silence they watched little cotton clouds drift by, and other tiny tufts slowly evaporated in the sun's warmth.
"My skin felt funny again yesterday." Rose whispered. Chloe felt the little girl's fingers touch her own, and she took her hand. Her hand felt…cold, even in this already hot morning.
"Yeah. Mine too. Feels like I have worms or bugs under my skin. But only if I'm really angry or upset. I think it's just my ADHD or something, maybe I'm on the autism spectrum, I don't know."
"I wish mine was AD…" Rose grunted, "AD…your thing. But it's not."
"I know. And I'm sorry. I wish I could relate."
"You're like a big sister to me, Chloe. You don't bully me for me being not normal."
Chloe gripped Rose's hand tighter.
"You're normal, Rose, just with added downloadable content," Chloe grinned," It makes you cool. You're unique. No one else is like you, just like no one else is like me. We're the cool kids!" She sat up, pulling Rose up with her, and gave the blond girl a big squeeze. Rose giggled.
"A sister from another mister!" Rose laughed, and Chloe laughed with her. At that moment she heard her mother's raging voice, and Chris' name being mentioned. And so faintly, she heard the low mumble of Chris. He was home.
Ask me for the truth, he told her. Chloe bit her lip. Maybe Chris will tell her who her father is.
The song for this chapter is Immigrant Song by Led Zeppelin.
Coz...Thor?
Chloe named Thor after our Marvel boy, so I chose the song since it's about the god himself and it was used in the Thor: Ragnarok trailer. As I said, this was meant to be soley dedicated to the dog, but I got a bit side tracked XD
I swear that this chapter is all over the place!