Where do you go when you're lonely?
Where do you go when you're blue?
Where do you go when you're lonely?
I'll follow you when the stars go blue.
Stars go blue.
Stars go blue.
Stars go blue.
"Ororo!" he shouted, in between knocks on her door.
"Logan," she hissed, pressing herself against the white wood of the door, "go away. I'm not going to let you in, and all that you're doing is drawing attention to yourself."
"I don't care. I'll wake up the whole mansion and get everyone up here, and I'll break down this door if I have to," he replied. Ororo shook her head and looked at her digital clock. It was midnight; Logan had been outside of her bedroom door, begging entry, for a whole hour.
"Logan, give up!" she said.
"No! Remember, Ororo, you started this, and now I'm going to finish it!" he said. His statement caught her off-guard.
"What?" she asked, "What do you mean, I started it? What exactly did I start, and how?"
"The day that Chuck died, Ororo. You clung to me, you cried like a little kid. Like it or not, darlin', you showed me that day that you hurt just like everyone else. You're still hurting, 'Ro…you're destroying yourself with pain, and I'm not gonna let you," he said, and the pounding on her door ceased, just long enough for fresh tears to spring to Ororo's eyes, "Let me in, 'Ro…just for a few minutes. Please."
She stepped back from the door and simply stared at it for a minute, a thousand emotions swirling through her head like a tornado. That day in the Grey house; she'd tried so hard to get it off of her mind, but now it all came back to her. The agony, the desperation, the feel of Logan's hard back, supporting her crumpled frame as they grieved together. Her hands flew to either side of her head, she swept them both through her white hair in awe, and then, as if in a trance, she walked towards the door and unlocked it. Out in the hallway, Logan tried one last time to jiggle the handle.
To his complete and utter surprise, this time, the door opened to reveal Ororo standing before him with a dazed expression on her face, and silent tears spilling down her cheeks. He closed the door behind him, and locked it again so that no one and nothing could interrupt them. She only stared at him, her chest heaving and terror apparent on her face.
"Logan…" she said, her voice squeaking, and then lowering to a whisper as she repeated his name, "Logan."
She collapsed to the floor, and he sprang forward to where she lie, picking her up and cradling her in his arms. He felt her tears soaking into his shirt, and she pressed herself against him, trying to get as close to him as she could. Her breasts were mashed against the hard muscles of his chest, and still she strained to get closer. Logan whispered her name gently as he stroked her back with his right hand, the other hand resting on the small of her back.
"I just…I miss them, Logan…both of them," she whined into his shoulder. He nodded. "I feel so guilty, and I feel responsible for their deaths."
"What?" he asked. He pushed her slightly away from him, only enough so that he could gaze into her eyes, "Why?"
"I don't know," she admitted, "I just…I've convinced myself that there was something I could have done…that I should have seen it coming and taken some action to…"
"No, Ororo, no. You couldn't have seen it; no one could have, not even Chuck. It was just…so bizarre. There was nothing that anyone could have done. If anyone's to blame, at least for Jean's death, then it's me, and I only did what I had to," he said, soothing her with his hands rubbing against her back.
"I know. I believe you. It's just so hard. I can't get over it," she whispered.
"No one expects you to," he replied, "all I wanted was for you to deal with it, you know, and to stop blaming yourself. I wanted you to be able to talk about it. I thought that it'd make it better for you."
"It has…you have. You've helped so much. But, Logan, I have to ask…why? Why do you care about me so much?" she asked, pressing her body to his once again. He kissed the top of her head and ran his hand through her short hair.
"Because," he whispered, "you're all that I have left. All that's left in the world. It's too late for Scott, and I couldn't save Jean, but you're still here and I can still protect you."
She smiled and brought her hand up to caress his hair. "Thank you," she whispered into his neck, brushing her lips again the sensitive skin there. Her breath made him break out into goose flesh, and before he could say anything more, he felt her lips pressed against his neck, and then moving up to his face to kiss his cheek. She pulled away lightly, her eyes smiling into his before she moved back in, planting her lips against his.
Logan was startled by this gesture, but he did not pull away. Her kiss was soft, slightly hesitant, as though she expected to be pushed away at any moment, and she gasped in pleasant surprise when he returned the kiss, deepening it, bringing his tongue out to meet hers. She breathed his name softly when they parted, and she began to stand up, urging him up with her. Her hand grasped his, and she brought him backwards, to her bed, where she pulled him down on top of her and kissed him again, more urgently than before. Her hands slid under his shirt, lightly tickling his back with her fingernails, and then ripping his shirt away with a haste that was almost animalistic.
Outside, in the star-spattered night sky, thunder boomed as she began to reach for her own shirt, pulling it over her head to reveal a white lace bra that framed her full breasts beautifully. Logan's head was spinning, but through the haze, he managed to come back to his senses and pull away from her. The look of pained surprise on her face nearly crushed him, but he knew that this had to stop, that nothing like this could happen between them.
"Logan, why?" she asked, tears welling in her eyes again.
"Because, Ororo…I can't do this," he answered her, retrieving his shirt from the floor and heading towards the door.
"Oh," she said regretfully, her voice drawing him back, "I should have known that you wouldn't want me."
"You think I don't want you?" he inquired, "You're so wrong. I want this more than anything, Ororo. I just can't let you get involved with someone like me. Not like this."
"Why not, Logan? I know what I'm doing," she said, getting up from the bed and coming towards him.
"No, you don't," he assured her, "I'll hurt you, Ororo. One way or another, I'll hurt you. I always…I can't take that chance. Anyway, I'm not what you want. You think that I am right now, but you'll hate yourself in the morning."
"I won't," she replied defiantly, "I don't care, anyway. I don't care if I regret it. I want it. I need you, now." With that, she grasped both of his wrists, and brought his hands to her chest, one on each of her breasts. "Please."
"Are you sure?" he asked, "We can only go so far until I won't be able to stop myself."
She nodded and led him back to the bed, where he kissed her again before undoing her bra, revealing perfect breasts with nipples the color of milk chocolate. He brought out his tongue to taste her neck, and she was tangy and earthy beneath his mouth. He licked down to her bellybutton before returning to lavish attention upon both of her breasts, while she rushed to undo his pants and remove them from his body, wriggling beneath him in pleasure all the while. His fingers brushed against the waistband of her slacks, stroking the skin that lay beneath.
"Logan…" she moaned, "don't tease me." Promptly, he reached for the zipper and slid her slacks and white lace panties away to reveal the soft V between her legs, crowned by a well-trimmed patch of white hair. She felt his hardness against her slick nether regions, and her hips instinctively bucked away from him before falling back into their original position. He looked into her face, questioning her silently, and her eyes told him all that he needed to know.
He eased softly into her, and she gasped softly in pleasure as he did. Logan rested inside of her for only a minute, before sliding almost out, and then bringing his hips to crash against hers once more. Ororo's arms and legs wrapped around his back, and she held him with clinging and grasping limbs as he ravaged her, all the while whispering to her how beautiful she was, how good she felt, how long he'd waited and how much he'd wanted this. She felt that she should answer him, tell him that she'd wanted him for years, but she couldn't form words; the only sounds that came from her were soft yelps of rapture, which amplified as she came closer and closer to her climax. Finally, she was alternating between pants and squeals.
Ororo screamed and lightning flashed outside of the window as all of the tension and passion was released from her body. Her velvet-soft sheath tightened around Logan, pushing him over the edge until, with one last grunt, he flooded into her, gasping her name. Her head fell back upon her pillow as she came down from her ecstasy, delighting in the feeling of his liquid warmth inside of her.
She didn't know what to say to him after he'd removed himself from her body, so she simply rested her head on his muscular chest and allowed him to run his right hand along her back. Ororo was seized with an overwhelming feeling of affection, and she felt that if she didn't pour the rest of her secrets out to him now, she would never, ever find the courage again. She rolled over onto her side to face him, and he looked at her in concern.
"What's wrong?" he inquired, "I didn't hurt you, did I?"
"No, no," she reassured him, "You did exactly the opposite. I just…I wanted to tell you something, Logan. It's something that I've been holding inside for far too long."
"What is it?" he asked.
"Logan, I…I…love you. I have since…since I can remember," she confessed, looking away from him. She felt his strong hand against her jawbone, and he turned her to face him.
"I know. I can feel it. You're radiating it right now, you know. And I think that you should know that I feel the same," he said. A true, genuine smile came to her face, and she snuggled back into his arms.
"How long?" she asked, "How long have you loved me?"
"I don't even know," he answered, "I realized it that night in the garden, when I saw you crying. My heart went out to you then, but after that I figured out that it already belonged to you."
His lips met hers for the last time that night. After that, they fell asleep in each others' arms, and when they dreamed, the dreams seemed less like nightmares, and more like the rest of their lives…together.
And in the now-serene night sky, two celestial figures danced together amongst the stars, all the while looking down upon the two people whom they'd loved while they were alive, and whom they'd finally succeeded in bringing together.
Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed, and everyone who will read (and hopefully, will review) in the future. Just as a follow-up to this story, I have to say that I was in love with the song "When the Stars Go Blue" when I first started this fic, but I work at a small grocery store in a little hick town where they play nothing but country music. In the past week and a half, I've heard this song at least twenty times, and now I can'tlisten toit without cringing. What an interesting twist, huh?
Eh, well…look for a possible sequel some time soon (as in, after I finish writing it).