Quietly, Margaret slipped on her housecoat and stumbled through the house until she found the back door. She could not fall asleep; well maybe she could have but lately sleep terrified her. Every night she would wake up in a cold sweat, with painful memories right behind her. Tonight was no different.
Silently Margaret slipped out of the house and just started walking. After about fifteen minutes, she found herself at the top of the cliffs. She seated herself on the ground, wrapping her arms around her legs.
"What are you doing here?" a man's voice caused Margaret to jump. She whirled around and was greeted by an equally surprised Hawkeye.
"Damn it Pierce; stop doing that!" she muttered in annoyance. Hawkeye held out his hand and she accepted it and he began to lead her towards the woods.
"What happened in Korea?" Margaret asked quietly. She knew it upset him to talk about it but it was driving her crazy not knowing what occurred.
"We were on our way back from a fourth of July celebration in Inchon. On the way back we stopped to pick up some wounded men; they warned us of a patrol coming our way so we pulled the bus off the road to hide it. There was a Korean woman on the bus with her baby. The baby just wouldn't stop crying." Hawkeye's voice was rising with emotion and Margaret did not know what to do.
"She smothered it." Hawkeye's voce quickly went flat and barely above a whisper. "She killed her own baby."
Hawkeye took a shaky breath and then continued. "I went crazy; literally. My mind wouldn't let me believe that someone would kill their own child." He looked at her, begging her to try to understand. Margaret impulsively wrapped an arm around his waist.
Hawkeye sighed and put his arm around her shoulders. "You're a good friend Hot Lips." Margaret smiled; the nickname had stopped bothering her long ago.
"Well here we are." Hawkeye announced. Margaret looked up in surprise; she had not known he had been leading her anywhere in particular.
"I don't see anything." She replied as she peered through the darkness.
"That's because it's not on the ground," he laughed while pointing upward. Margaret lifted her head and saw a relatively large tree house situated directly above them.
"Come on," he said as he grabbed her hand and led to a tree that had several boards nailed into the trunk, forming a ladder.
"You can't be serious!" Margaret exclaimed. Hawkeye only looked amused as she shook her head resolutely. "No way; not a chance."
Hawkeye smiled in a coaxing manner and Margaret again shook her head. "No Hawkeye! I am not going to let you drag me up into some ancient, rotting tree house!"
"You know Margaret," he began slyly, a devilish look entering his eyes. "I seem to recall a time in a certain hut when I helped you quite a bit. As I remember it, you…"
"Oh shut up." Margaret snapped as she pulled herself onto the first plank of wood. After a shaky start, Margaret managed to pull herself onto the platform. She leaned, wearily against a tree branch as Hawkeye quickly made his way up to her.
"Now what did you drag me up here for?" she asked in annoyance. Hawkeye pointed behind her and she gasped when she saw the moon high above the shimmering water.
"I made sure my dad built it high enough so I could see the ocean." Margaret smiled and turned her body so she could rest her back.
"It's pretty Hawk."
Hawkeye invited her to sit next to him. Margaret debated for a moment, unsure if she should but finally relented and leaned comfortably into his arms.
"My dad built this for me right before my mom died." Margaret nervously gnawed on her lips before working up enough nerve to speak.
"How did she die?"
Hawkeye smiled sadly and shook his head. "My dad said she was going in for some tests and before I knew it she was gone." Hawkeye chuckled cynically and continued. "Then when I was in medical school they were teaching us about psychological problems and they took us to a large institute in southern Maine. We were analyzing patients and trying to discern what their problems were. One of the patients was my mother."
Margaret looked at him in shock and he shrugged. "I asked one of the doctors there to keep me informed on her case. She died a few months back; she was hit by a car."
Margaret sighed and leaned against him. She could not believe that he had known all these years, what a horrible burden to deal with.
"Do you want to know the worst part?" he asked; Margaret nodded. "She did not even recognize me." Hawkeye sighed heavily and rubbed his eyes. He looked up and smiled, wanting to change the subject.
"You never told me why you were out here in the first place." Hawkeye prompted.
"Neither did you," she reminded. Margaret really did not feel like explaining her dreams to him right now.
"Alright, I'll go first. I didn't want to go to sleep because I'm tired of dreaming."
Margaret chuckled nervously, that was terribly close to what she was feeling.
"Your turn," Hawkeye teased as he poked her side. Margaret glared at him and shrugged nonchalantly.
"Same as you." She said lightly.
"You can't steal my answer!" he laughed. He looked at her and saw that she was avoiding his gaze and he grew serious. "Do you think they will ever go away?"
"I don't know Hawk." Margaret sighed and frowned. "Sometimes I feel so alone because no one understands what I've been through."
"You're not alone." Hawkeye assured her as he pulled her closer to him. "I'm always going to be here for you."
Margaret shook her head in frustration and began to stand up. He did not understand; she needed more than just a friend. What would happen if she needed him in another five years but he was happily married? Margaret did not think any wife would take kindly to her husband comforting another woman.
As Margaret stood up Hawkeye grabber her hand. "Stay with me?" he asked. Margaret shook her head but he persisted. "Please? The sun will be up soon and I don't want to wait it out alone."
Margaret could not refuse. How often had she been alone at night, wishing she had someone nearby until morning? She sat back down beside him and laid her head against his shoulder. They sat silent and motionless until their weary eyes slowly began to droop shut. By the time the sun rose behind them, they were fast asleep in each other's arms.