Friends and Lovers

by: Foul Fountain of Flies/Night Strider

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto although I wish I own Neji, heart and soul. Bleah.

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Chapter IV: The Triangle Breaks Up

Today, he isn't his usually hyperactive self. There are times when he will sit still in the corner, silent, brooding over something he can't quite conceive. Today is one of those times. There are times when, as opposed to that reserved behavior, he's loud, restlessly blissful, carefree and seemingly forgetful. Inconsistency seems to be the only accurate word to describe him ever since Uchiha Sasuke upped and turned to smoke. He finds it hard to digest that Sasuke would leave voluntarily, vowing to never come back, to never remember. But even then Uzumaki Naruto doesn't lose heart; he struts ever so uprightly, knowing in his heart of hearts that Sasuke will be back. Something will lead him back come hell or high water.

'Naruto,'

Naruto, conscious of his own suffering only, sits still. The voice, low and hollow-sounding, reverberates across the darkened room. The rest of the class has left a few minutes ago. The desks stand unoccupied except that one on which Naruto's elbows are resting. He looks up to see Sakura standing before him, her face devoid of expression and warmth. She smiles then, knowing that her gloomy face won't allay Naruto's pain any. But as the smile covers the width of her face, Naruto sees that it's mirthless and banal as a mask. True, glumness is contagious.

'Naruto,' she repeats as the other snaps out of his reverie. 'Kakashi-sensei has assigned the class to read page 317 of Poe's, The Fall of the House of Usher. It's quite short; I'm sure you won't find it hard to read.'

Naruto nods at her. How well she knows him, how well she reads him as she would a book. She knows his mind was elsewhere when Kakashi and the class were absorbed in a heated discussion just a little earlier this afternoon; she knows he was still locked up in his own misery when Kakashi made mention of the assigned reading and dismissed the class. All throughout the meeting, Naruto's mind was flying somewhere else, far away.

'Yes, thank you Sakura-chan.' He replies. The emptiness inside him is reflected in the tone, momentarily seeping through his own tongue.

'Don't mention it.' She says. 'Shall we go home then?'

They saunter to the door rather wordlessly. The silence betrays their thoughts as they walk further on the corridors. Naruto has been having difficulties lately, or longer than anyone has bothered to notice. His surrounding barely reaches his attention. Save for Sakura who, for now, may be harboring as much pain. Naruto fares better than Sakura in hiding it though. At least, intermittently, Naruto finds consolation in the presence of his other friends, Shikamaru, Chouji, Kiba and even Shino and Hinata. Sometimes, he even seems honestly happy and maybe, he really is. As for Sakura, she has Ino. But Ino doesn't hearken to her emotional needs because Ino is also one of those who grieve after Sasuke's departure. It's not that she won't, but she can't. The more she and Sakura get together, the more they become aware of their loss and loneliness, the more they sink into their individual hurts. Unconsciously, they broaden their distance between them as the company of the other simultaneously tires them both. They have begun hanging out less frequently. They know they need time alone, apart from each other, because each other's face, its visible sadness, is too much a reminder of the gap Sasuke has left behind. Yes, he left for them to feed on his absence. He has always been cruel to those who love him.

'Hey Sakura-chan,' Naruto says after sometime. 'That Lee guy is nice and kinda cool, isn't he?'

'I should say so.' She says, suddenly feeling a little lighter. The afternoon she met Lee recurs to her now. It happened the school year prior on account of the freshman orientation. There was a campus tour so as to familiarize the first year students with the school grounds; Lee, then a junior, was to be their guide. He immediately exacted Sakura with special attention which didn't escape her. She brutally ignored him and his pleasant hints which came in the form of excessive gentlemanliness. He was so pedestrian, the kind one just walked on by forgetfully. She silently rejected him. But then he was always polite, always courteous and hardworking. One time he even defended her against the bullying jerks from the upper level. She was thankful. He, for his part, finally ingratiated. But unlike Naruto who would scream it to the world that he just saved a girl that needs protection, Lee handled everything coolly. He smiled at her, told her to take better care next time and left. Just like that. They met afterwards in the library, accidentally, because both seem to love the place. Lee briefed her about the teachers, told her about the subjects, shared his experiences with her. He seemed to be very well accomplished; he had impeccable grades, he was very competent. But something inside him seemed to aspire for more and unless he reached the pinnacle of his potential, he wouldn't stop trying. He's also the type that never gives up, Sakura thought of him then. She secretly idolized him. She promised to be as smart as him.

'Someone told me you've been hanging out in the library together.' Naruto says good-humoredly.

'It's not arranged. Both of us go to the library very often; sometimes we meet and talk. Otherwise, he's with his friends.' Sakura answers, un-mottled.

'What do you talk about, Sakura-chan?'

'The subjects, and the teachers who teach them.'

'So that's why you know so much!' Naruto exclaims, feeling cheated. 'Hey Sakura-chan, will you let me go with you sometimes? Thick-brows can probably help me with my subjects.' He pleads. He doesn't just do bad in his subjects, but dismally.

'Only if you don't call him that.' Sakura remonstrates him. 'Lee-sempai has been a great help to me. He's really smart. You should respect him.'

'Really? Hard to imagine someone smart with those brows.' Naruto mumbles.

'Naruto!'

With the tension unstrung, they laugh. They haven't done so lately. It feels strangely good to laugh freely even in the very absence of whom they care for the most. Sasuke's gone, yes, but in a very unreal sense. He has run off with that mad scientist of a biology teacher, Orochimaru, but it doesn't mean that they should lament for it forever. At any rate, he will come back, inevitably. They know he will.

Naruto and Sakura wade their way home, electing to ease their mind off Sasuke for the meantime.

--

Why am I supplied with endless worries? Why did I have to say nothing against my nomination? Of course they took it as leave. Stupid people. Why is everyone so troublesome…well, except Chouji. Or to be fair, why am I so unmotivated? Why do I spurn responsibilities so? I can't help it, really…

Disoriented and yet calm on the surface, Shikamaru lies on his back with his face upwards. He figured he'd be needing to dissipate his anxieties before the full realization, his plight's magnitude, clashes on him. As a solution he snuck off again from the class to bask in the warm sunlight of the Leaf High School's rooftop. He yawns comfortably. Every intake of air away from the crowd eases him. This is like a dream from which he dreads waking. If he wakes, reality will hit him full in the face; he's a presidential candidate. He's subject to the humiliation that comes after defeat. But hell, what does he care? He doesn't care, not one bit. His small renegade, Chouji and Ino, they're the ones who care. They and their pathetic eagerness. Or perhaps Naruto cares too; after all it's his crappy idea to nominate him. That turd; I'll kill him after this, Shikamaru thinks, already fantasizing about wringing Naruto's neck and scratching his eyes out. He can see Naruto's blue eyes as they bulge out of their sockets; he is guffawing and his eyes are starting to water. He thinks it's funny! I'll really kill him, and I'm gonna make it the one practical joke he'll never forget, ever!

He snuggles up to his side then, lets his wrath evaporate and is about to close his eyes when his ears catch footsteps, heavy footsteps whose sound grows louder and louder as the person approaches. If it's Asuma, I'm done for, he thinks. But then only Chouji and Ino know that I'm here. Did they rat on me? Or what? He remains languidly still in that position, anticipating a heavy blow on his head. Seeing that nothing has hit him up to now, he turns his head to see a stranger staring curiously at him.

The stranger has long black hair tied up in a loose pony tail. It's a he, but something about him seems feminine. He looks almost beautiful from this angle, from where Shikamaru lays. Just a sissy; not worth interrupting me in my sleep. Done with sizing the boy up, Shikamaru snorts and is about to resume his rest when the boy speaks up.

'Who are you?' His voice is deep and has an air of authority in it that Shikamaru finds hard to miss.

'I don't reveal my name to anyone unless he reveals his first.' Comes Shikamaru's reply.

The boy doesn't speak. Whatever expression he means to assume is suddenly punctuated by something else unintended. He looks halfway troubled and composed, or neither. It's impossible to tell. In contrast to Shikamaru's, his eyes are white, purely white, that it's even harder to tell if he's thinking at all. And yet something about his stance, his stiffly straightened shoulders, implies the amount of self-respect he has for himself. It's reassuringly enormous. He's probably a senior. Normally, lower year levels would tremble away from his kind. He seems so intimidating, Shikamaru gathers. But he's not as intimidated as he led himself to believe. He doesn't care after all. This kid might as well be a cold statue.

'What are you doing here?' the boy speaks again in the same demanding tone. Shikamaru, who is now convinced that the boy is some tipster the principal sent to spy on his mundane activities, decides to answer him with satire.

'Penitence for not learning anything from the lessons.' Take that, faculty. 'You, why are you here?' Shikamaru continues, indisposed to fall for the trick he thinks the school administration has plotted against him.

The boy looks at Shikamaru in the eyes. The calmness in him subsides and disappears entirely. He looks frazzled, his poorly maintained coolness giving way completely. He frowns and for the first time Shikamaru is able to read the expression on the pools of his vast, waning, white eyes. Something's hostile in them and yet something in them also tells that he's capitulating. To what, lord knows. There's another period of silence before the boy breaks it.

'I came here…' The boy gives it a start. 'to search for what to say.'

Shikamaru doesn't respond. He didn't prepare any words for such remark; it's too beyond him. Plus, starting a conversation is troublesome. He notices that the boy has let his shoulders fall down. Finally, that erect posture makes me ache for him, Shikamaru tells himself. He shuffles to his feet and totters forward the boy. No, he can't be some spy; he seems okay. And he doesn't even know why he seems okay; just that, he really is. Somehow.

'You know, I find it hardest to search for what to say too. Sometimes.' Shikamaru says. It' none of his intentions to comfort the stranger, if he's in need of it at all. It's just the truth he can offer at the present.

The stranger sighs. He's been corking his troubles inside longer than he can stand it, Shikamaru can tell. But even so, he seems so set on guarding his mysteries. He looks at Shikamaru once more and opens his mouth.

'What happens after disappointment?'

'Huh?' Shikamaru frowns. Sure, the question demands repetition and right now it's confusing the hell out of him. 'What was that?'

'What would you do if you've been proven wrong?'

'I don't know.' Shikamaru indulges himself with a pause before going on. 'Food for thought though; try to forget about it. I mean, who cares?

'I do.'

'Well in that case, you're asking for a sleepless night. I don't see why people worry so.' Shikamaru says but he knows it's a lie. He himself has been worrying lately more than he'd give it credit, and because he has been worrying he sought for peace, here, on the rooftop.

'People worry because of expectations. And it's precisely that why I do.'

'There are those who don't; and there are those who shouldn't.' Shikamaru protests. 'Why should we care about what others say? I know you wouldn't do much of my bidding, but if I were you I'd do as I please. I wouldn't give a hoot about what everybody says. It's my life anyway.'

The boy gives him a disturbed glance. Shikamaru breathes in, crinkles his face up and moves closer to the boy. He seems to be studying him, as if he'd find out the stranger's identity if he moves near him. Agitated by Shikamaru's scrutiny, the boy backs away.

'What are you doing?' He asks Shikamaru, flushing.

'You're a senior, aren't you?' Shikamaru says, raising an eyebrow, his arms akimbo.

'So?'

'AreN'T you loitering?'

The boy glances at his watch and realizing that Shikamaru's right, lets out a spasmodic 'tsk'. He must've run late. Without a word, he darts his way to the exit where the sound of his footsteps subsequently dissolves in the air.

Alone once more, Shikamaru lies down on the bare floor. He folds his arms beneath his head in lieu of a pillow. Facing up the sky, he thinks of what tune to whistle. Then as if in need of a deep sleep, his eyelids begin to flutter until his mind blacks out altogether.

TBC

A/N: I'm so sorry. I know the chapters are way too long. Don't worry; I may cut them down someday. Soon as the pace demands to get slower, you know. Anyway, thanks for reading.