Animorphs belong to KA Applegate, Xelaman and the Elemaki are the intellectual property of Korean Pearl, to whom I owe a huge intellectual debt.How Loathsome:Today at School the hovercraft dropped us off not 750 hooves from the hiranti tree that is the entrance to our school.

We all galloped as fast as we could, to see who could get there first, though we were careful not to beat any of the boys. Rohuzahen a rather unstable female, had this morning decided to break this unwritten rule and win, which everyone agrees is most uncivil behaviour.

When Gonrod-Isfall-Sonilli (a male a year younger than us) wisely tried to restrain her from such vulgar behaviour, she reacted in quite ludicrous fashion. He was forced to hit her legs with his tail, and she fell over in the mud. We all laughed, and our teacher Aisenolli-Chyqunos-Eborari told her she was as filthy as an Elemaki. Our class found this most amusing. After school, as we trotted to the hovercraft stop, we called her Elemaki Filth. Head high, as she cantered on ahead of us-which is precisely the behaviour which got her into trouble in the first place!

The whole of Rohuzahen's family are very stupid: when Rohuzahen was born, her father did not have the grace to accept this unfortunate state of affairs (as my family did), but instead tried again for another child, this time being successful in their quest for a boy. This resulted in the birth of her irksome little brother Xelaman.

What a loathsome family-they lack true reverence for the laws of our people.