Introduction

An alternate ending to Act 6. What if Dee hadn't listened to Ryo's pleas? What if the bullet had hit Ryo, instead of the wall?

Torn apart by guilt, Dee can only watch as the trust he shared with Ryo crumbles away, leaving their growing relationship a broken and shattered one. And when Ryo announces that he's leaving, it looks like all of Dee's hopes for a future with the man he loves have become impossible to achieve.

With only himself to blame for the turn of events, Dee searches frantically for Ryo, only to find that his old partner seems to have disappeared for good. Is this the end of their crime busting team? Has Dee's mistake cost him his dream of being with Ryo?

As events unfold, two hearts are broken….

Chapter Six; Harsh Reality

"Ryo…" Dee breathed, and a pair of startled dark eyes lifted to meet his gaze with their own.

Those brown eyes instantly hardened as they settled on Dee, and their owner smoothly got to his feet, carelessly dropping the book he had been reading onto the coffee table. Ignoring his former colleagues, Ryo squeezed past the group in the doorway and quickly started off down the corridor, muttering something about finishing up his paperwork.

"Ryo! Ryo, wait!" Dee yelled after him, ignoring the startled looks of confusion he was getting from the Star Investigations staff. Getting no response from the blonde he made to pursue him, only for arms to wrap around him and restrain him.

"Cool it, Dee…let him be for the moment. I know you've been looking for him these last two years, but it's gotta be a shock for him seeing you again after so long." Drake pointed out sensibly.

"I guess…" Dee sighed, allowing his friends to lead him back into the Recreation Room.. Taking in the stunned faces of his soon-to-be workmates he smiled sheepishly, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck with a calloused hand.

"Looks like Ryo never explained why he left his old job, huh?" He guessed.

Carlton blinked, visibly getting a hold on himself as his ordered brain took in the confusing scene before him and dissected it, drawing out the most important information for him to analyse.

"Ryo? You mean Randy?" He paused, turning the facts over in his mind. "I can't ever recall someone calling him by that name before."

Dee froze, green eyes widening almost comically as he realised his mistake. No wonder searching for Ryo hadn't found any results…Randy was, after all, his given name, and what Ryo would be going by now that he didn't work at the 27th precinct. Dee could have kicked himself for being so stupid.

"I…Ryo's his Japanese name. I kinda took to calling him by it when we first started out as partners together." He said weakly.

"Oh…you mean he actually partnered someone?" The woman previously identified as Lisa said in surprise. Dee frowned in confusion, not understanding what she was talking about.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean…" He began hesitantly.

"That's enough Lisa. I'm sure Randy wouldn't like being talked about behind his back, hmm?" Carlton interrupted, cutting into the conversation before Lisa could say anything else.

Moving to the whiteboard in the corner of the room, he began to jot down names, scanning the piece of paper he had in his hands to make sure he hadn't missed anyone before ripping it up and dropping the pieces into a small box.

"Now, let's work out who's partnering who…" Glancing at the room full of expectant faces that were gazing at him so trustingly, he sweatdropped and held out the box weakly.

"Ready to choose partners?"

As Dee made his way slowly down to the corridor to his office for the next few months, he felt a distinct sense of foreboding. Coupled with the stormy atmosphere ahead and the sharp twisting in his gut, he was about ready to run and hide. Even though he knew full well that his friends were still in the Recreation Room behind him, the corridor seemed unnaturally subdued and silent.

That silence was suddenly shattered by a loud bang from up ahead, accompanied by the crash of several things falling to the floor.

"No! I won't! There is no way in Hell that I'm partnering that treacherous idiot!"

Biting his lip, Dee quietly moved towards the source of the noise. Peeking through the crack of the not entirely closed door, he watched as Ryo glared furiously at Carlton, his hands resting on the desk as if they'd been viciously slammed down on top of it. An upturned tray with folders spilled across the floor explained what the crashing sound had been.

"Look, I don't know what happened between you and Dee in the past, but I do know that it was your name he pulled out of the box. Which means that you'll be his partner for the next 3 months." Carlton said seriously, his demeanour calm despite the pure rage radiating from Ryo in front of him.

"Then partner him with someone else! I'm telling you this right now, Carlton…I will not work with him!" Ryo snapped hotly.

At these words Carlton scowled, loudly slamming a hand down onto the desk to join Ryo's own trembling ones.

"Ryo, I will not tolerate this sort of behaviour! Ever since you started work here you've stubbornly refused to work with a partner, making up excuses about bad teamwork or your partner's incompetence. I turned a blind eye to it because you're a damn good cop, but I can't ignore it anymore! We accepted this arrangement to foster a good relationship with the 27th precinct, and you damn will partner Dee Laytner, or you'll be kicked out of the agency! Do you understand!"

Ryo slowly sank back into his chair, the fight almost visibly going out of him as he stared bitterly up at his supervisor.

"Yes sir." Carlton's face softened and he sighed to himself, raking a hand through his hair as he moved to lean against the wall.

"I'm sorry Ryo…but there aren't any other people for Dee to partner with – not withMike retired now. I don't know why you have so many issues about having a partner, but I think it's time you worked them out, don't you?" He asked softly. Ryo said nothing, merely bowing his head in both defeat and acknowledgement.

Outside of the room, Dee stood with his back pressed against the wall, emerald eyes wide with shock as he took in what he had just seen and heard. How deeply had he hurt Ryo for the wound to still be open after so long? For Ryo to continue to shy away from having a partner? Remembering back to how friendly and warm Ryo had once been, Dee felt sick as he realised the immensity of the change he had wrought in Ryo.

Stealing himself for the fireworks he was sure would come, Dee moved away from the wall and rapped on the door before he listened to his more cowardly side. Somehow he knew that if he waited any longer he'd lose his nerve…and then he'd never get a chance to make Ryo forgive him.

There was a moment of awkward silence on the other side of the door, and Dee could almost imagine the concerned look Carlton would be giving Ryo, the way the blonde would be stubbornly glaring down at his lap and refusing to look up. Then Carlton's rich tones called out for him to come in, and Dee did so hesitantly, not missing the venomous look he got from Ryo as he entered.

"Ah, Dee. Well, this is Randy, your partner for the next few months…but as you already know each other I'll leave you two to get reacquainted." Pausing a moment to clap his hand reassuringly onto Ryo's shoulder, Carlton left the room without further fuss.

Immediately, Dee felt the air around them drop several degrees, and he winced as he glanced at Ryo only to see the honey blonde glaring hatefully at him,

"Look Ryo, I…I just want you to know that I didn't rig the selection. I honestly didn't think that I'd…"

"Randy."

"Huh?"

"My name's Randy, not Ryo. I'd appreciate it if you called me by my real name."

Dee froze, his mouth working silently for a moment as he struggled to come to terms with this other change in their already unrecognisable relationship. To him, Ryo had always, always been Ryo…to call him Randy now would mean…

"Ry…Randy, I…" He said helplessly.

"Paper's in the cabinet behind me, pens and pencils can be found in the desk drawers. There's a computer on each desk, but we mostly write things up by hand here, so you won't be needing it. Any questions, ask and I'll explain. Got it?"

Seeing Dee's shocked expression at his cold tone, Ryo shrugged uncaringly, sneering slightly at his stupefied partner.

"Just because we're partners again it doesn't mean that things will just go back to the way they used to be. We work together, we get the job done. That's all." He said icily. Moving to the filing cabinet behind him, Ryo yanked out a folder and dropped it casually onto the desk, indicating for Dee to pick it up.

"That's my current case. Take the day to read it and get to grips with it. Until tomorrow morning you're free to do whatever you want." Taking the file with trembling hands, Dee's grip suddenly tightened until his knuckles turned white, and he whipped around to seize Ryo's wrist before the blonde could make it out of the door.

"Damnit Ryo! If you think I'm just going to give up on you, then you've got another thing coming! I love you so much it freakin' hurts, and I'm not going to just let you go! I…" Dee's voice, already choked with emotion, trailed away as he took in Ryo's shocked and flustered expression, his eyes widening slightly as they came to rest on Ryo's parted lips. For a moment, it was as if they were back at the 27th precinct, and Dee found himself slowly leaning forwards…only for the illusion to shatter as Ryo's expression suddenly closed off, yanking his arm free of Dee's hold.

"Do whatever you want Dee. But just remember one thing – I could never love you." The words slammed into Dee like a freight train and, as he stood there reeling, Ryo took the chance to escape. For a moment Dee was frozen. Then, with a loud gasp, he dropped to his hands and knees, a choked sob escaping him. Trembling violently, he started as he felt two streams of tears flowing down his cheeks, and hastily moved to wipe them away.

>All this time, all this waiting…only to have all my hopes crushed.> Dee thought bitterly, curling in on himself. Feeling a fresh wave of tears threaten to strike, Dee wrapped his arms around his waist like he had once dreamed Ryo might do one day. In all the months he'd pursued Ryo, the blonde had never outright rejected him before. Sometimes been angry at being kissed, yes. Harshly claimed that it was pointless trying, no. And it hurt more than Dee had thought possible.

Had Ryo ever known how serious he was about him? That his 'I Love You's weren't meaningless? Sure, in the beginning Dee had just been joking around with him since he was so damn uptight, but after a while, after he'd spent more time with him…Dee had realised that his feelings for his partner really did run deeper than simple camaraderie and respect for a fellow colleague. He'd begun to pray that Ryo would stay close to him forever.

>But because of my stupidity, my prayers can never be answered.> He realised, bowing his head. >Because with one bullet I didn't just ruin any chance I ever had of getting with Ryo…I destroyed the man I love and replaced him with some stranger that I don't even recognise.>

>God, what have I done?>

Dee emerged from the office half an hour later, looking much more worse for wear than he had been when he'd entered it. Anyone who knew him at all would have seen immediately that something was severely wrong with the dark haired cop…and as luck would have it, someone who knew him extremely well was there to see it too.

"Dee? Dee? Honey, are you ok?" There was the sound of clicking heels as someone ran to him, and Dee looked up to see Amanda's worried face staring at him, brown eyes searching his face for any sign of what had happened.

"Mandy…" He mumbled, and a perfectly manicured hand reached up to cup his face, its thumb stroking his cheek reassuringly.

"I'm here, Dee…what on earth happened? You look like Hell…"

Dee chuckled bitterly, the sound shockingly unnatural in its falsity. Even more concerned now, Amanda shot her new partner a look over her shoulder, silently begging him to give them some space. Getting the hint Alex nodded, bending to pick up the box of files Amanda had carelessly abandoned in her worry for Dee and making his way back to his office.

Satisfied that they had privacy now, Amanda took Dee's hand and gently led him over to seating put out for visiting civilians, sitting and tugging Dee down after her.

"Dee, honey, you have to tell me what's wrong, or I can't help you…" She murmured patiently, waiting for her friend to open up and say what was bothering him. When it finally became apparent that no response was coming, however, she quickly grew aggravated.

"For God's sake, Dee! Stop wallowing in your misery and tell me what's wrong like a man! Don't make me do something I'll regret…" She threatened, grabbing Dee's chin with one hand and yanking his face to the side, forcing him to look at her. On seeing the tears clinging to his dark eyelashes, words failed her for a moment. Then, her eyes narrowed and the next thing Dee knew his cheek was stinging from the blow she'd just dealt him, the sound ringing round the corridor.

On the plus side though, the pain had at least cleared his head enough for him to get a grip on himself.

"Sorry Mandy…I just lose control there…I am alright though, I promise." He said hoarsely, shooting Amanda a worn, weary grin. The blonde woman hesitated for a moment before returning it, moving to affectionately smooth some strands of hair back from his face.

"I'm sorry I had to hit you, Dee…but you just wouldn't listen…"

"It's fine, Mandy. I honestly left you no choice." Dee said firmly.

"But…" Amanda gazed at him for a moment, before sighing and looking away, a small smile pasted over her features. "I just want you to know that I'm always willing to listen to you, Dee…so if you ever need to talk, feel free to call me, whatever the time. Although if it's anytime past midnight I can't be responsible for my actions the next day." She joked.

"What are you going to do? The same thing 'you'll regret'?" Dee asked lightly, green eyes twinkling with something similar to their old sparkle once again.

"Well…let's just say that I may be motivated to remove a certain part of your anatomy that it would be a real shame for you to lose…" She smirked, practically purring the words as she leaned close to breathe them into his ear.

Dee jerked back, swallowing hard at the smouldering look he saw in her eyes for a moment, before it was veiled once more.

"But I honestly do mean it, Dee…I'll always be here for you." Amanda said quietly, wrapping her arms around Dee and pulling him closer into her embrace. At first, Dee merely sat frozen. But then he surrendered to the friendly comfort she was offering, hesitantly returning the hug and burying his face into her hair.

Neither one saw the other man standing at the end of the corridor, watching them with his fists clenched slightly as he saw their embrace.

Even if they had, he was too far away for them to see the look of pain that washed over his features for the briefest of moments before being carefully smoothed away.

Author's Note

You all have permission to kill me now - two months! How on earth did I leave this for two months? I'm so sorry everyone! I lost my inspiration for this fic temporarily, but it's back now! I'll hopefully update quicker next time!Thank God for science lessons - perfect writing time! (Sweatdrop)

I hope Amanda came across all right then...I don't want her to seem like someone out to cause trouble for anyone, or another JJ...I've actually grown quite fond of her now! And who saw them? Dun dun dun! (As if you can't guess).

I'm also taking Nariel's example and shamelessly advertising my newest fic, Kawazu No Koishii - it's an Eerie Queerie one, so if you like that series please check it out! Read and review please!

PS...if anyone can message me and recommend some good TsumexToboe Wolf's Rain fics, I'd really appreciate it...I just got into the anime, and I just adore that pairing!

Blood Tears Dying Angel - Heh...that wasa while? What about this time's update? Thanks for your comments!

ColeridgeFan - Yay! Mandy fan! And yup, I'm English - and 'git' has to one of my favourite words! But there are so few opportunities to use it...sigh. I also got banned from using the email system at school because I called someone a git through it...stupid filter system.

sweetrosey - You hate me? (Gets watery eyed) I hope you really didn't die while waiting for my next chapter...

Melantha Delmar - Well, you guessed it! Ryo's new partner is Dee! I toyed with the idea of putting Mandy with him, but I don't think it would have given me enough chances to get my beloved bishies together, so Dee it was! Thanks for your comments!

sdl - I'm so sorry I left you hanging and took so long to update! And yup...very obvious, but that's my author's right as a cliched shonen-ai fangirl! (winks)

AeryonSun - Wow! Thanks for your comments! They really gave me a boost! And yes, those two are just so brach and obnoxious...they really should clash as much as possible! I'm glad you like Mandy too!

Nariel - You scare me...you love making people cry? Ha ha...did Ryo get partnered with who you thought he would? Oh, and about your fic and my lack of reviewing it on the other site...I swear someone told me you couldn't review without being a member there, so sorry! But at least I reviewed it here!

firgodes7 - Sorry I left you waiting so long...and we finally saw what happened between them!

tammy-love - Ever considered a career as the voice over person at the end of anime episodes? Hmm...some of those ideas are quite good...but nope, Ryo hasn't forgiven him! You baka, Ryo!

GreenEyedFloozy - That's my reaction to Ryo too! I love him to bits! No wonder he was voted most popular FAKE character! Oh, and I reviewed some of your work the other day - write more please!

Lady-Willowish - Yup, he so needs a hug...up for the job? And that scene in the manga...I really wish Sanami Matoh had actually written this happening!...although then I wouldn't have had the chance to put my favourite FAKE bishies through such lovely angst!

gPhoenix513 - Yeah...it's a wonder Dee hasn't exploded by now, if you know what I mean...(wink) Sorry the update took so long! And about someone being with Ryo...you should find out in the next chapter, so keep an eye out!