-It's a Knux Life!-
By Zuki the Chao
This chapter includes everyone's favourite Detective team ...and we also get Eggman to do stuff ...yay?
I'm glad some people are enjoying this weird little fanfiction (Albeit mostly for its randomness)! Like, w00h peoplez!
Chapter Four
-Somewhere in Station Square, or whatever- Let's go to the E.G.G.M.A.N, yo!-
Eggman: -Yawn- I wonder how Rouge and Metal Sonic are going. I really should be making sure that they're following my orders, considering that Rouge is pretty much in it for herself, and Metal Sonic is probably one of my most disloyal robots ever. But I won't. I'm going to go for a walk today instead. Never put anything before your exercise!
-Eggman slowly gets out of his Egg Mech., almost crushing an innocent passer-by, and stretches his arms out slowly-
Eggman: Phew… it's… hard work… -Collapses, sweating- I forgot how hard exercises are… -Sob- Heeelp!
-A passer-by hears the cry for help, and rushes up to the fallen… man.-
Passer-by: -Turns down his headphones and puts his hand out- I heard ya need some help!
Eggman: No.
Passer-by: -Stares at Eggman- But, but you just said… -Eggman stares at him as if he's crazy- Eh, okay. -Begins to walk off-
Eggman: Noo! Please save me!
Passer-by: -Turns back- So you do need help?
Eggman: No.
Passer-by: -Glares- Fine! -Manages to stomp a few steps away until…-
Eggman: Noo! Please-
Passer-by: -Veinpop- Argh! Stupid fat man! -Grabs Eggman's arm and pulls him to his feet-
Eggman: -Stares- Thanks a lot! -Hugs a stranger. Er, I mean, the stranger. If it's possible-
Vector: (For of course, it was he) -Stares at Eggman, worried. As you would be. Unless you're a big-time Eggman fan, which in this case, you'd probably be begging him for his autograph, or something- Er, is this some kind of joke?
Eggman: No. I'm so glad you saved me! -Happiness! Joy!-
Vector: Would you let go of me!
Eggman: No! I wuv you! -
Vector: -Disturbed- Uhh…-Mind boggles-
-Charmy the bee flies up, and almost crashes into Eggman and Vector-
Charmy: Hey Vector! ) What're you doing? -HAPPY!-
Vector: -Throws Eggman off him, which isn't Eggmanly possible. But neither's Omochao, and he's real, too- Getting rid of this creep! Let's run! -Grabs Charmy by the arm, and they run off-
Eggman: Aww. -Sad-
STATION SQUARE
-Mission: Escape from Eggman!-
-Vector and Charmy run for a while, collect rings and destroy a few random robots, before stopping to catch their breath-
Charmy: Vector, why was that man hugging you?
Vector: I helped him get up on his feet, and he hugged me!
Charmy: Wow! Now there's a fanboy for you! –Giggles-
Vector: It wasn't funny, Charmy! -Glare-
Eggman: Yeah, that wasn't funny! -Glare-
Vector+Charmy: ARGH! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM!
Eggman: I… don't know!
-Vector and Charmy have already sped off while Eggman was saying this very long sentence-
-After some amount of running, Vector and Charmy stop to like, you know, breathe. And that sentence sounded kind of wrong. Ew.-
Vector: I think we've lost him!
Espio: -Steps out of nothingness, since he was invisible… just then. Because I say so.- I heard you two were in trouble? -SERIOUS-
Charmy: -Flies around Vector's head. Yes, like an Omochao- Yeah! Vector's got himself a fanboy! Tee-hee!
Espio: …I don't see how that could be too troublesome. Disturbing, yes, but not troublesome.
Vector: You'd be worried if you saw the guy!
Eggman: Hey, that's not nice! -Sob-
Team Chaotix: -Girly scream-
Eggman: Please don't run away. I won't hug you, I promise.
Vector: Ya sure?
Eggman: Indeedy! Have I ever lied?
Espio: Well…
Eggman: Hi, I'm Eggman.
Espio: We… already know that?
Eggman: -GASP!- Omg! How did you know!
Charmy: Uh, you just told us?
Eggman: ...Oh. Hey! I know! Do you wanna help me find an Emerald?
Vector: No.
Espio: We'd never help the likes of you!
Eggman: Aww... Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease! -Jumps up and down like a schoolgirl-
Team Chaotix: Aaaaaargh! Alright already! We will!
Eggman: Yeeay! –Blank- Hey, do you wanna see a cool dance?
Vector: Eh, not really…
Eggman: Okay! -Does some weird dance which involves jiggling- Do the Eggman! Yeah! Do the Eggman!
Charmy: -Stares at Eggman, pauses, and then flies around, giggling- It's kind of hypnotic huh?
Vector: MY EYES, ESPIO! MY EYES!
Espio: Let's leave this scene, now!
"Roses aren't always red..."
(Knux and co. are still walking…)
Amy: Are we near it yet?
Knux: -Sweatdrop- Uh... You mean the Emerald, right?
Tikal: That was a completely lame attempt at innuendo, you two. -Shakes head-
Knux: -Sarcasm, sarcasm- Oh, are you going to be smart now, Tikal?
Tikal: -Glomps Sonic- What are you talking about!
Knux: -Sigh-
Tails: -Veinpop- Get off Sonic, Tikal! I'm sure he doesn't like that!
Tikal: But Sonic and my love is true! It surpasses time, sense and logic!
Tails: -Stares- Well, what do you think about that, Sonic?
Sonic: Duh…
(A rare glimpse inside Sonic's brain!)
Inside Sonic's Brain: -Theme song from Playschool plays-
Sonic: -Goofy smile-
(The sun collapses and the moon jerks up)
Tikal: -Giggle- Time for us to sleep... I bag Sonniku!
Tails: Ew, No, that's gross! …I want him!
Tikal: He's mine!
Tails: Mine!
Amy: -Hits both of them on the head with her Pico Pico Hammer- Don't be stupid! Sonic's all mine! If only I could find him… -Looks around, in vain-
Sonic: -Blinks- I'm right here, Amy?
Amy: It's almost as if I can hear him talking... -Looks up at the sky, sadly. Boo-hoo!-
Tails, Tikal and Sonic: -All stare at her-
Tails: Well, I guess we should just all sleep in separate spots, then.
Tikal: -Mischievous look- Unless it gets cold, for some reason…
Tails and Tikal: -Glare at eachother-
Sonic: -Yawns, and goes off to sleep by a tree-
(Tails and Tikal follow him)
Knux: Something about them worries me, although I'm not sure what.
(Amy walks up to him)
Amy: I'm so sad Knuckles. I can't find Sonic. -Sob-
Knux: But… he's right over there. -Points to where Sonic is sleeping, peacefully, and Tails and Tikal are fighting-
Amy: Ohmygosh! You are so mean and insensitive, Knuckles! No wonder Rouge thinks you're stuck up! -Runs away, sobbing uncontrollably-
Knux: -Looks over at Sonic, then back at where Amy was- But, he is… -Long pause- ROUGE THINKS I'M STUCK UP! WHAT A HYPOCRITE! I CAN'T IMAGINE WHERE SHE GOT THAT IDEA! -Fumes-
Sonic Jr.: -Walks up to Knuckles- -Suck Suck- -Sits down next to him and goes to sleep-
Knux: -Sighs, and sits down too- I've really got to ask Tikal, what I did to offend those Echidna gods… Because man, I'd love to know why everything is going so…
Omochao: -Flies past, singing some random… I dunno… Micheal Jackson song. Does that qualify as random, or would you expect to see an Omochao, singing a Micheal Jackson song?-
Knux: -Loooong pause- I'm just going to shut up now. -Curls up to go to sleep-
"Black as Ebony and Psychotic as Amy…"
-Metallix and Villien catch up with Rouge and chaos-
Metallix: -Salutes-
Villien: Hi! Salutations! Where's the Barbecue Sauce?
Rouge: -Pause- …Huh? Oh there you are Metallix! Who's this?
Villien: I'm Villien the Chao! I'm cute, lovable, and totally collectable! -Pose-
Rouge: Aww, So cute! -Tries to pat Villien-
Villien: -Bites her finger- Get your hands off me!
Metallix: -Grabs Villien by the neck-
Villien: Yeesh! Sorry, sorry... -Mecha drops him-
-Grins evilly- …Sorry, Mecha's girlfriend!
Rouge: Mecha's… girlfriend…? -Enough to set anyone's teeth on edge-
Metallix: -Stares at Villien, trying to compute what it exactly is that Villien keeps on implying-
Chaos: -Glares at Mecha- Rouge is MY girl! Got that? Tin Can!
Mecha: -Glares back at Chaos-
-Chaos and Metallix glare daggers into eachother. Forget staring contests, folks! Real men have Glaring contests!-
Villien: -Snickers, and does a little "Bad Chao" dance-
Rouge: -Rolls eyes- Oh stop it you two! -Shoves them away from each other- Come on, let's go...
I love Team Chaotix, they're my favourite team to play in "Sonic Heroes", specially since I used to play Knuckles Chaotix, too. (Albeit on a Rom… -Gets flamed-)
'Course, this being the fabulous "It's a Knux Life", they had to be butchered, but I'm sure they'll forgive me one day.
-Resumes hiding under her couch, while many angry voices can be heard in the background, and a shuriken narrowly misses her ear-
Zuki