Title: Confessions Lead to Strange Bedfellows
Author: Kimberly21570
Fandoms: Guiding Light / All My Children
Pairings: Olivia and Natalia / Lena and Bianca
Disclaimer: The characters of Olivia and Emma Spencer, Natalia and Rafe Rivera, Phillip Spaulding, Josh Lewis, Frank Cooper, and Ashlee Wolfe are owned by CBS/TeleNext and Proctor & Gamble. The original characters of Dantéa (Téa) Rivera, Dr. Valerie Blaine, Dr. Maya Carter, and Dr. Kaitlynn MacKenzie are the property of this author, and any resemblance to fictional characters, or real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
No copyright infringement intended with regard to Guiding Light, CBS/TeleNext, Proctor & Gamble, AMC, ABC/Disney, or any other entity. With the exceptions of the Farmhouse of Love and Cedars Hospital, the settings, dialogue, and story content in these scenes are original. Written for fun, not profit. All other standard disclaimers apply.
Many thanks to my friend and favorite FFW, WickedWanda926, and to my friend newfan64, for their ongoing willingness to edit my stories. Words cannot express how much I appreciate the two of you and your steadfast support of me, both personally, and as a would-be writer. Due to the rush to get you all this update, however, this content has not been edited. Thus, any mistakes contained herein are solely my responsibility. Thank you to all who continue to read and/or comment. I appreciate the time you have invested in this story, and truly hope you continue to enjoy.
Rating: Chapter 18 is rated PG-13 for some coarse language. Read: Olivia Spencer is super pissed, and she doesn't care who she offends. Oh, and I think it goes without saying, but… Frank Cooper is a dick.
Confessions Lead to Strange Bedfellows
Copyright May 2009
"For the greater the love, the greater the grief, and the stronger the faith, the more savagely will Satan storm its fortress."
C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
Chapter 18.4 – What Price We Pay:
Wednesday, July 8, 2009… The Farmhouse of Love—2:30 a.m. Central Daylight Time
"Rafe! Rafe, wake up!"
Olivia's voice sounded strained as she called out from the doorway of the guest room where he slept. She hadn't been in this room since he came home, and was surprised to see how tidy he kept it. Strange thing to think about given the circumstances, she thought. But then, everything seemed strange at the moment. Nothing felt right.
When he didn't budge, she rushed into the room, placing a hand on his bicep. It trembled so fiercely that she didn't have to bother shaking him. "Rafe, wake up. I need your help," she said, her tone now frantic.
"What the…?" Understandably startled by the late-night intrusion, Rafe groused, still half asleep. He rubbed his eyes as he sat upright in the bed.
"I'm sorry I startled you," Olivia apologized. "But I need you to get up and help me with your mom."
Dark eyes, so much like Natalia's, opened to her, and she nearly lost her balance as she watched the fear set in. Tossing the covers aside, he sprang from the bed. "What's wrong with my ma?"
"It's the baby, Rafe," Olivia informed. "I'm not sure what happened, but we need to get her downstairs and into my car."
"What about the EMTs?" he asked, already scrambling to into his jeans and sneakers, not even bothering with socks.
Olivia was shaking her head. "There's no time to wait," she reported with a sense of urgency he'd never before seen in her. "She's losing a lot of blood."
"Shit!" Rafe cursed. He grabbed a discarded t-shirt from the laundry basket, and pulled it over his head. And from that instant, everything else was a blur until the moment he'd watched the taillights of Olivia's car disappear into the dead of night, leaving him standing there all alone, covered in his mother's blood, and terrified.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009… The Chapel, Cedars Hospital—7:45 a.m. Central Daylight Time
Five hours.
That's how much time had elapsed since he'd watched her drive away. She'd only asked that he stay behind long enough for Jane to get there to look after Emma. And the moments dragged by as he waited, his anxiety rising exponentially with the passing of every single one. He'd had the wherewithal to shower and change while he waited, but even the warm, relaxing water did nothing to curb his anxiousness.
And later, in that barren E.R. waiting area, with nothing else to occupy his thoughts as he waited to hear their fate, every single detail had come back to him, in living color—the image of his mother, her limp body, her tangled hair, lying on the bathroom floor in the master bathroom, the pool of blood growing larger with every moment that ticked by. He didn't know anything about medical conditions, but it seemed like she was slipping in and out of consciousness, even then. And now he had answers. But none of them were what he wanted to hear. He felt so grateful when Ashlee showed up. He should've known she would come immediately when he called. She was always there.
He glanced at her, sitting there beside him in the chapel, and reached over, taking her hand into his own. "Tell me I did the right thing," he said, his dark eyes pleading for absolution.
Still stunned, not only by Rafe's confession about what he'd said to the doctor, but also by the scene that had just played out before her, Ashlee took the time to process before speaking—an anomaly, to be certain. "I understand why you said what you did, Rafe," she finally said after several minutes of deliberation. "What I don't understand is why you believe that inaction doesn't constitute a choice on your part."
"I don't understand," Rafe said, confused.
"Allowing the doctor to intervene would at least give them a chance, even if the chances aren't very good," Ashlee reasoned. "By doing nothing, you're effectively choosing to end both of their lives."
"No, I'm not," Rafe disagreed. "I'm choosing to let God decide what happens. Life and death are in His hands, not mine."
"I think that's a copout, Rafe," Ashlee said bluntly. She'd heard exactly what he said about not blaming Olivia and Frank for being angry with him. She'd also heard the fear and the sadness in his voice as he'd recounted their interaction. He wasn't okay at all with the decision that he'd made, and she was certain she knew exactly why. "I think you're scared, and you don't want to face the responsibility of making the wrong choice, so you're hiding behind your faith. That way, it's God's fault, not yours."
Her words stung, and the expression on his face made him look as though he'd just been slapped. The problem was, she was right, and he knew it. Dropping his head, he closed his eyes as he blew out a breath. "God, Ash, I don't know what I'd do if something happens to my ma," he cried. "I don't wanna be the one to make that decision."
Reaching over, she ran her hand across his back in a comforting caress. "That's what Olivia was trying to say to you," she pointed out. "She's afraid you'll regret this decision, Rafe. She's just too upset right now to say it rationally."
When he said nothing, Ashlee continued. "If this decision was up to Olivia, and she'd said what you did, what would your reaction have been?"
"I would've raised hell, just like she did," Rafe answered.
"I think you've just answered your own question, Rafe," Ashlee pointed out.
"I guess I did, didn't I?" Rafe sighed, realizing he had no grounds to argue. He glanced at her then, meeting her gaze. "Thanks for callin' me on my crap, Ash," he said with a sigh. "I can always count on you to be honest, even when you know I won't like what you have to say."
Shrugging, Ashlee smiled at him. "That's what friends are for, right?"
Rafe nodded. "Yeah," he said. "And I'm really glad you're mine."
Wednesday, July 8, 2009… The Chapel, Cedars Hospital—7:45 a.m. Central Daylight Time
As Ashlee and Rafe talked quietly inside, Olivia frantically paced back and forth along the hallway just outside the chapel. Upon her return from the parking lot a few minutes earlier, the ensuing conversation with Rafe had gone nothing like she had planned. Instead, it was more like a futile scrimmage that ended with an explosion of epic proportions.
She found him in the Chapel with Ashlee. He'd gone there to pray—to beg God to intervene so that neither of them would be lost, only to hear silence echoing back at him. He felt lost, and angry, and… scared. But most of all, he felt abandoned by the God he was trying to appease, despite the blistering ache in his own heart and conscience.
And then there was Olivia, standing in front of him, looking so lost and scared herself. She reasoned, and he countered with Church doctrine. She begged, and he cried tears of anguish, but he wouldn't relent. She cursed and screamed, and he just sat there, helpless. Unlike his mother in recent months, he was doing what she had always taught him was right—he was holding fast to the teachings of their Church—or so he told himself.
"Fuck the Catholic Church, Rafe!" Olivia howled in a final bid to get him to move. She was terrified and desperate, and at that point, she didn't give a damn about offending God… or anyone else for that matter. All she wanted was to ensure that she wouldn't lose Natalia, and that their daughter would have at least a modicum of a chance at survival. After all, miracles did happen—Natalia always insisted it was true. "What has that fucking place, those uptight, judgmental bastards, ever done for her, except to condemn her—for getting pregnant with you and with Téa—for loving me?"
"Olivia—"
The calming sound of Josh Lewis's voice brought instant silence. She turned toward him, tears streaming down her face. "How did you…"
"Rafe called, after you heard from the doctor," he answered before she could even finish the question. "He thought you might need a friend."
She went to him without a moment's hesitation, allowing him to gather her into his protective embrace. "Oh, god, Josh, I'm so glad you're here," she sobbed into his chest, the dam of despair finally giving way as he held her close, gently stroking her hair.
"I'm so sorry this is happening, Olivia," he whispered against those soft chestnut locks. "I can't imagine how much it hurts."
"She could die, Josh," Olivia cried. "We could lose them both."
"I know, Darlin'," he gently soothed. "I know…"
She hadn't a clue how long she'd stood there, crying in his arms. But when she finally regained her composure, Josh encouraged her to come out into the hallway where they could talk without disturbing the sanctity of the chapel—he was, once upon a time, a minister, after all. And there he listened intently to her as she poured out the details of Natalia's medical condition and the danger to both her and the baby, and as she vented about her frustration and fear, all while she wore a path in the linoleum flooring.
"I'm really sorry to interrupt," Dr. Blaine said respectfully when she came upon Josh and Olivia in the hallway. Olivia had finally settled down, and she was sitting next to Josh on a bench just outside the chapel doors.
"No, that's okay," Olivia said, turning toward the doctor. "How are Natalia and Téa?
"We all need to talk," Dr. Blaine said forthrightly. The expression in her eyes said it wasn't good news.
Olivia motioned toward the chapel. "Rafe's inside."
Dr. Blaine nodded, following Olivia and Josh into the small room, taking a seat across from Rafe.
Rafe's heart rate double-timed and he sat up straight. "How's my ma?"
"I'm afraid we can't wait anymore," Dr. Blaine said, gravely. "Things have taken a turn for the worse, and we have to do something, or we're gonna lose both of them."
"Go ahead with the surgery," Rafe finally relented, his tone calm, yet distant. "Do what you can to save them both, but…" Pausing, he reached over, taking Ashlee's hand into his own, as he met her gaze, seeking assurance.
When she nodded, he drew in a deep breath, exhaling slowly. "If you have to choose, save my mother," he instructed. "Please…"
"Okay," Dr. Blaine said with a nod, acknowledging his directive.
"What?" Frank snapped from where he stood in the doorway, listening. "Rafe, you can't just…"
But his protest was drowned out by the sound of Olivia's voice. "Oh, god…" She exclaimed, as she exhaled a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. And then her emotions overtook her again, and her eyes welled up with tears. "Thank you, Rafe," she cried, as her heart simultaneously ached and rejoiced. "I know this isn't easy."
"Don't thank me," Rafe said absently. He felt numb inside. "Thank Ashlee."
The sound of Frank's heavy boots pounding against the worn linoleum echoed off the walls, but not nearly as loudly as the booming sound of his voice as he screamed at Rafe, accusing him of all manner of evil things, including being a murderer. Cowering, Rafe lay there on the pew, sobbing in Ashlee's arms.
Josh stepped in, warning Frank to calm down—or else; even as Dr. Blaine threatened to have him removed from the hospital if he didn't get himself under control.
"This is neither the time, nor the place, Chief Cooper," Dr. Blaine said sternly. "Right now, we need to focus on getting your daughter delivered, and then do our damnedest to save both their lives."
Effectively silenced, Frank slumped down into a pew, sulking.
"You've got specialists lined up?" Olivia inquired, sniffing back the tears. "I don't care what it costs. I want the best."
"We've got calls out to them," Dr. Blaine assured. "We can conference in by phone, if necessary, until they can get here. Our staff is fully capable of carrying out directives in their absence."
Nodding, Olivia sighed. That wasn't exactly what she wanted to hear, but it was better than nothing. "Okay," she said, trying to sound optimistic.
"All right, then," Dr. Blaine said. "I've got to get going so we can get her prepped. I'll keep you posted on the progress."
"Can we see her?" Olivia asked, sounding hopeful.
"Olivia, she's still unconscious," Dr. Blaine reminded. "She won't know you're there."
"I understand that," Olivia said. "But we'll know."
Allowing empathy, rather than intellect, to lead her, Dr. Blaine considered Olivia's point of view, and then nodded. "Okay," she agreed. "But only for a minute or two, all right? We need to get things moving."
Olivia's nod of agreement was almost frantic, as she reached for Rafe, lightly shaking him. "Hey, come with me," she said gently. "We're gonna go see your ma before they take her back."
Numbly, Rafe nodded as he swiped at the tears with his shirt sleeves. "Okay, yeah," he said absently. "Yeah, I wanna see her."
As Olivia and Rafe followed Dr. Blaine from the chapel, Josh took a seat next to Frank, hoping to talk some sense into him. From the expression on Frank's face, he realized it would likely be the hardest sell of his entire life.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009… Emergency Room, Cedars Hospital—8:00 a.m. Central Daylight Time
"Five minutes," Dr. Blaine said sternly as she left Olivia and Rafe alone in Natalia's cubical.
Olivia nodded. "Understood," she agreed, as she and Rafe moved to opposite sides of Natalia's gurney, each taking a hand into their own. Leaning close, Olivia's tears fell against Natalia's cheek and shoulder, as she brushed light kisses against her forehead and temple, while murmuring quietly to her, telling her how much she loved her. Everything in her wanted to crawl right into that bed with her, and just hold her until the danger dissipated. She hated feeling so helpless.
"You gotta hang in there, Ma," Rafe said, sniffing back more tears. "The doctors are gonna try real hard to fix everything, but you gotta stay strong for us, okay?"
"That's right, Sweetheart," Olivia said, pressing another kiss against Natalia's temple. "Dr. Blaine is gonna get Téa out of there, so they can fix what's wrong. We have the best doctors to help you, and they're gonna do whatever it takes to make sure you're both okay. You just… you have to stay strong for us, just a little while longer."
And then they stopped talking, and just settled quietly into the moment with her, each praying silently for a positive outcome for both Natalia and the baby. A few minutes later, Dr. Blaine returned, indicating that it was time. Simultaneously, they nodded their understanding, and with a few more whispered words and light kisses to Natalia's temples, they released their holds on her hands, backing away from the gurney.
Without even a moment's thought, Rafe wrapped an arm around Olivia's shoulders, allowing her to lean into the strength of his body, as they watched the orderlies wheel Natalia away. "She has to be okay," he said, more to himself than to Olivia. "She just has to be…"
Nodding, Olivia sniffed back tears. At least now, she had a fighting chance, and for that, Olivia was profoundly grateful.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009… The Chapel, Cedars Hospital—8:30 a.m. Central Daylight Time
Olivia's eyes flickered upward in response to a noise that emanated from the back of the chapel, and turning toward it, she found Phillip standing in the doorway. She sighed heavily. "I can't deal with you right now." Her heart ached, and her voice was filled with exhaustion.
"Olivia, please. I'm not here to cause trouble," Phillip said, quietly. "I just want to help."
"I don't need your kind of help," Olivia spat.
Entering the room, cautiously, he inched closer to her. "I don't blame you for hating me." His tone was accepting. "I just… I remember how powerless I felt when Lizzie was sick, and I… I wanted to offer whatever resources you might need," he said empathically. "No strings."
Olivia glanced up at him again, eyeing him warily.
He read the guardedness in her eyes, and reached out, gently placing a hand on her shoulder. "I swear, Olivia, no strings," he reiterated. The sincerity in his voice reflected in the clear blue of his eyes.
Releasing a slow breath, Olivia nodded her head. Natalia had said that she trusted him—and Olivia trusted Natalia, so she relented. As long as he didn't mention anything about taking Emma, she was willing to give him a chance to prove himself again. "Natalia's in surgery right now," she reported. "They're taking the baby."
"I know," Phillip said.
A sharp laugh snapped from Olivia's lungs. "I don't suppose you're at liberty to tell me how."
Phillip grinned. "Not if I value my sources in this town."
Olivia nodded. She could certainly relate. "Dr. Blaine has a call in to a neonatal specialist from St. Louis," she reported. "We're waiting for a response."
"This doctor is better than anyone in Chicago?" Phillip inquired gently, concern in his tone.
Shaking her head, Olivia said, "There's a Dr. Kait Mackenzie in Chicago. She's supposed to be the best there is, but she's unavailable—out of the country or some such bullshit." Dr. Blaine had explained this just prior to taking Natalia into surgery.
"Well, then we'll get her back in the country," Phillip said, as if he had the power to make her appear at will.
Olivia shook her head. "She's at a conference halfway around the world—there's no time. The specialist in St. Louis—a Doctor…" She searched her memory for the physician's name, "Dr. Maya Carter—is apparently our best chance."
"I'll send the Spaulding jet immediately; have it waiting at the airport for Dr. Carter when she calls. And while we're waiting, I'll make sure this Dr. Mackenzie is on board as well. I don't care where the hell she is, she can weigh in. That's what video conferencing is for—right?" he reasoned.
When Olivia said nothing in protest, he turned to leave. And then he heard his name being called in a voice so faint, it nearly brought him to his knees. The fight was clearly gone from her, and her pain was so palpable he could feel it in his soul. He wanted nothing more than to ease it, if only for a moment.
Turning back to her, he placed his hands firmly on her shoulders. "You don't have to say anything, Olivia," he whispered. Gently, he pressed his lips to her temple, as he squeezed her shoulders supportively. "I know…"
She simply nodded in response, and with that, he took his leave, already dialing the Spaulding pilot as he stepped from the room.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009… Geneva, Switzerland—5:30 p.m. Central European Summer Time
On the other side of the world, Dr. Kaitlynn MacKenzie tucked a lock of shoulder-length chestnut hair behind her right ear, and leaned back into the plush leather of her office chair, the elegant material of her cream-colored linen suit rustling as she crossed her legs, right over left. Skillful emerald eyes scanned the documents that had just been received via electronic transmission over a secure line, as she settled into the conference room that had become her temporary office.
A world-renowned specialist in the field of neonatology, she was accustomed to being called in for consults on tough cases, even from a distance. In fact, her specialty was exactly what had brought her to Switzerland, where she was now conducting clinicals with a small group of the world's most promising young neonatologists-in-training. Ordinarily, she wouldn't have accepted a consult case while teaching, but the details as they were presented to her, were intriguing, to stay the least. And it hadn't hurt that the request had come from Phillip Spaulding.
The deeper she delved, the more intrigued she became with this particular case. The records were devoid of any identifying information—a means of ensuring the patient's privacy—yet the particulars of the case felt like déjà vu. Not only with regard to the mother who, as of last report was still deemed to be in serious condition following the emergency Caesarean section, but also to the newborn baby girl whose fragile life hung in the balance. If she hadn't known any better, she would have sworn they were…
No, they simply could not be.
Willfully, she shoved the disquiet from her soul; though, she couldn't deny the similarities to the past case. They were, in fact, the reason she had been contacted for a consult on the case in her hands. She couldn't leave Geneva at the moment, but she could, and would, consult with Dr. Carter, the specialist who had been called on-sight. History made her fear the outcome—and it also made her prudent. She knew it would be in the best interests of everyone involved to have a world-class pediatric surgeon on call… just in case. Fishing her cell phone from the pocket of her pleated linen trousers, she hit the contacts button, and scrolled through to the "R's", tapping on the cell number of an old colleague and friend. If this case didn't destroy her, it just might bring her a touch of healing for the loss of a child she could not save; no matter how much she had loved her.
TBC in Chapter 18.5…