A/N Ooook so I finished this when I should have been cleaning, but oh well... My parents aren't home, so they won;t know how long I sat on my ass and did this. Hahaha. Ok so another Sahara slashfic. Because it's so damn addictive. And DirkAl is just sexy. Ok, so lotsa angst in this one, but also makeup sex. Postmovie, so yes, this is movieverse. Rating is M for lotsa F-bombs and sex. Characters belong to Cussler and Paramount.

There was one absolute in Al Giordino's relationship with Dirk Pitt: they would always be friends. Al grinned to himself and picked up the ball.

He paused when he caught sight of the cave drawing. Oh wait, there's a second absolute, Al thought absentmindedly, clutching the ball tightly, feeling the muscles in his throat clench uncontrollably.

That absolute was that Dirk was always going to be running off with women. And from the moment Al met her, he knew Eva Rojas would be just like the others. Well, maybe not just like them because she seemed to have a brain. And charms. And good looks.

"Damn!" Al kicked at the wall angrily and trudged back up the hill, trying to wipe his mind clear of the pattern that had been developing for years.

His mind was relentless, however, making images of similar events pop up, unwanted and cruel, before his eyes. Images of Dirk going off into the sunset with a woman, leaving Al behind with a promise he'd be back soon. Images of a returning Dirk, shoulders slumped and drunk off his ass, wallowing in depression.

"Don't do this to yourself, Al." He gritted his teeth and saw the approaching figures of the children who had befriended him. He feigned a smile for them and handed the ball to the smallest boy. "Hey, I need to go do some stuff for work, so keep playing without me, okay?" The little boy nodded, even though Al was pretty sure he didn't understand, but that didn't really matter; he was lying anyways.

His footsteps were washed away by the softness of the sand, and for a moment, Al wished it was the sand of a beach. Al shook his head fiercely and ran a hand through his dirtied hair. Stop. His mind resisted and started back up with memories of the pattern. Fine then, torture yourself to death.

Dirk and Al had a ritual. After Dirk came home drunk and moping, Al would always get him to tell what happened, and usually Dirk said the girl was bored and wanted to go back home or to work or whatever. He'd stare morosely down at a shot of tequila and slug it down aggressively. Al would sigh and tell him it was for the best and try to get him to cheer up. The alcohol would help the process along, and before either of them knew it, they were tangled in a despairing kiss.

The door to his room in the city loomed ahead, so Al reached out to grab it, washing himself in the memories without a struggle. His hand trembled slightly when he pushed it open.

The kiss would heat up, and more often than not, Al would be slammed into a wall or desk or whatever was available. Clothes would be shed at random moments, and Dirk would have his hand around Al's erection within seconds, making Al gasp into Dirk's mouth and clutch the hair at the nape of Dirk's neck. Dirk would grin and remove himself from the kiss to lick a trail down Al's neck to his collar bone, chuckling every time Al would moan or yelp.

Oh fuck, this isn't helping. Al was facing a small problem as a bulge developed in his pants. He smacked himself in the head disgustedly and flopped on the bed, hoping he'd be able to ignore it and get to sleep.

But the images danced in front of his eyes tauntingly. Dirk would flip Al around and continue to suck on his neck as he thrust in gently, whispering concerns about Al's wellbeing. Al would always tell him to shut the hell up and get on with it, and that would start the frenzy. Dirk would moan loudly with each thrust as Al yelped at the touch of Dirk's fingers pumping him steadily. Their free hands would intertwine at the final thrust that sent them spiraling over the edge and against the wall.

Al's eyes were glazed when a phone rang. What the? Oh, goddamn satellite phone… He got up and wandered absently throughout the room, trying to remember where he put it. He located it eventually in his bag, so he fished it out and answered it. "Hello?" he muttered sleepily.

"Al? Al, is that you?" The voice seemed a bit worried, but most of all, the voice was feminine.

"Eva?"

A sad chuckle rang in his ears, and Al couldn't believe it. How'd she get this number? More importantly, why was she calling? The questions seethed over in his mind and spilled out of his mouth. "Hey, what's up? How'd you get the number?"

"I called the number to the Martha Anne, and Rudi answered. He told me where you were and how to reach you, so… here I am." Her voice was cold and distant, most likely from the thousands of miles that probably separated them.

"Here you are…" Al repeated faintly. He was getting more confused by the second. "Umm, why did you want to get a hold of me? I mean…" His eyes widened fearfully. "Dirk's okay, right?" He thought in fleeting panic about the possibility but calmed down when he actually thought about it. "No, you'd have told Rudi when you called him. Wouldn't you have? Or…?" The panic arose again and settled too comfortably in his stomach, and Al plunked into a chair fearfully.

Eva's voice breezed over the lines, her accent lilting the words. "Al, calm down. He's fine. Well, he's not hurt, at least…" Her words seemed to be a sigh of misfortune, so Al held the phone closer, knowing all too well what she was hinting at. Her voice rose with sadness as she continued, "He's fine, of course. He left a while ago, saying something about the Texas and meeting you to finish the job."

"Really?" Al's eyes widened, and he saw his knuckles go white, so he loosened his grasp on the phone. But his attention refused to waver.

Eva laughed bitterly. "Yeah, I told him he could stay longer if he wanted, but he said no. At first, I thought his vacation time was up, but I remember that he had close to three weeks." Al heard her inhaled and wondered for a second if she was crying. No, she's stronger than that. Eva seemed to gather herself together. "It's all for the best, really. We're both travelers, and it woulda never worked."

Al didn't really know how to respond; women weren't his forte. They were Dirk's. So he all he could do was mumble an apologetic, "Yeah."

There was an uncomfortable silence over the lines, and Al was just about to ask what she had called for when she did it for him. "Oh, I'm sorry, Al. Here I've had you going on for five minutes now. I'm sorry." Al tried to stammer that it was alright, but she charged forward. "I just thought I outta let you know that incident made me worry about Dirk. I dunno if that's normal for him or not, but I just figured I should warn you in case it's not."

Her voice sounded rushed and flustered, so Al knew it best to end the conversation soon. "Thanks, Eva. I… I hope I see you again somewhere, okay?"

"Okay." And then there was nothing but silence where her voice had been.

Al sighed and tried to think about what she said. Dirk? Acting… different? It startled Al that Dirk would walk away from someone he so obviously liked, from Eva. Hell, the woman was nice enough to warn the best friend of the guy who blatantly dumped her! What the fuck is going on?

Unless… Al shook his head and got up to put the phone away. No, it can't be. Yet, the possibility haunted him as he stared out the window to see the fading sun. He… He wouldn't do that. Would he? Al felt his chest grow tight, and the room began to spin in the approaching nausea.

He wouldn't have lied to me all these years. He just… wouldn't… Oh, God…

Al tripped over something on his way back to the bed, but he ignored the pain it created in his foot. His body felt numb as he covered himself in the blankets and tried to dissuade himself of the possibility. He felt cold, despite the fact he was in the middle of the Sahara desert, and not even the thought of Dirk returning to laugh it off warmed him. He didn't dare close his eyes for fear of the nightmares he knew his panic would create.

The bed creaked as he stood up, forfeiting all chances to get to sleep at the moment. Al made sure not to trip again and wound up in front of the door, unsure of where he would go. Anywhere but here…

His felt like puking but thought better off it, yet his mind refused to give him any mental rest. The concept just wasn't right in his mind. The breeze of the open air wrapped around his limbs like a gauzy blanket as he tried to concentrate.

Dirk wouldn't pretend and lie to Al about his reasons for leaving those women all these years. Dirk wouldn't make up excuses and ditch a perfectly hot model. Dirk wouldn't, even more so, use Al as a toy for his mind games. Because he didn't play mind games.

Does he?

The question danced in the night sky, trailing across the stars in the reflection of Al's eyes. He sighed inwardly and felt his body meld into calmness after a few deep breaths.

Something rustled in the sand to Al's left. The lengthening shadows made it difficult to discern who, but a shallow exhale that smelled of the ocean and tequila made it very clear to Al. Just like clockwork.

"Over here, Dirk." His words tasted bitter and hollow as he shrugged them off his tongue. He heard Dirk curse something about the dark and then shuffle closer.

Al held the door open and studied Dirk. His eyes were puffy, and his hair was a mess. The blueness of his eyes was as faded as his clothing as he looked vacantly into the candlelight beside Al's bed. He didn't even bother to look up when Al shut the door or sat on the bed or stared pointedly into Dirk's eyes.

Is he acting? I… I don't know anymore… Al cleared his throat of the swell building, and the noise seemed to snap Dirk out of it, his eyes fearfully resting upon Al's concerned face. "Hey, Al… How you been?"

At this point, Al wanted to jump up and yell at Dirk, if just to wipe the drunken grin off his face. But he can't. His voice wavered as he coldly stated, looking at the floor, "Great. Just peachy."

"Aww, come on, Al. It can't have been that bad. You had the Texas to work on, which by the way, is going well, I presume?" His eyes seemed to brighten at the mention of his treasured Holy Grail.

Al bit his lip nervously. "It's going… Well, to be honest, it's going slow."

"Why?" Dirk's eyes bored holes into his forehead, so Al looked back up at him and glared.

"It's just going slow, alright?" Al can't bring himself to tell Dirk why and reveal these last few weeks have been full of him avoiding anything to with the memory of Dirk. And that meant the Texas.

Dirk stood up and looked around the dirty room. "Yeah, but I know you. I know you. You've had two weeks, and you still say things are going slow? What the fuck, man?" His words were sharpened by the tequila, and the cut through Al like a knife.

Al's voice rose in pitch as he spat, "Fuck off, Dirk. This… The Texas… It's yours, alright!" Dirk scoffed, obviously not catching his friend's idea. "She's your baby, your most valuable possession, whatever. But not mine… So…" He swallowed again and tried to bring his voice back down. "So, I thought it'd be alright if I slowed the project down until you got back, so that way you'd get to be doing what you've been dreaming of for years."

A small voice chided Al for not telling Dirk the other reason, the one Al had thought of just moments before, but he shut the voice up and tried to gauge Dirk's response. Dirk sucked in his cheeks and exhaled loudly, continuing to look away from Al, seemingly assessing the room. "Nice place you got here."

So that was it then. Dirk's usual way of ending a conversation by switching the subject. Bastard. Al nodded and stood up from the bed, taking a look around himself. "Yeah, Modibo was cool enough to let us all stay with his people here. I got my own room, too." Dirk didn't seem to be listening, staring morosely at the pictures Al had stolen from their quarters on the Martha Anne. Al sighed but gave in and tried to ease the tension. "Yeah, it's a nice place, but the cable rates are obscene. And the picture…" He pointed to the wall. "It's a bit grainy."

Dirk snickered and punched Al's arm playfully, moving past him to jump down on the cot. "Nice bed, but can it hold more than one?" His voice was hopeful as he grabbed Al's wrist and pulled him down to sit on the edge of the bed.

Don't do this, Dirk. Please… Al felt his eyes sting, and he forced himself to look away from the blue eyes that seemed to go on forever. "So you gonna tell me what happened or what?"

"Christ, Al!" Dirk sat up roughly and glowered at his friend.

The dirty blonde sighed and rubbed his temples. "We're gonna end up talking about it sooner or later, so we might as well get it over with."

"'Over with?' You make it sound like it's a chore." Dirk sounded like he was pleading now, letting his hand rest gently on Al's shoulder.

The contact didn't sooth Al, in fact, Dirk's fingers felt cold and abrasive. But he didn't shrug them off as he said quietly, "It's not, Dirk. It's just…" The fingers tightened. "It's just… I don't know…" Al hung his head and tried to block out the doctor's voice that was replaying shrilly in his head.

He heard a creak behind, and judging from the fact that the hand was gone, Dirk had lain back down. "Fine, Al. You wanna know what happened?" His voice was spiteful and embittered. "She said that she needed to go back to work. That's all. She needed to go back to the WHO, and that's it."

Al couldn't believe it. It was either the doctor's story or Dirk's. Al would normally screw the other person because hell, they hadn't been his best friend since kindergarten, but something in the way Dirk was using his forearm to shield his eyes made him shiver. "Al?"

He got up from the bed dizzily and looked forlornly at the pictures, letting his eyes rest on the one of them in the Navy, arms slung around each other and smiling. Al felt his heart sink into his stomach as he got up the nerve to say what was on his mind. "You're lying."

"Excuse me?"

Al grit his teeth and didn't turn around. "You're lying."

He heard the sounds of Dirk getting up behind him and felt Dirk's hand on his shoulder, spinning him around to face him. His eyes glinted dangerously, but Dirk kept his voice cool. "Now what would make you say that?"

For some strange reason, Al didn't feel afraid. "The doctor… She called me and told me how you left, and she failed to mention that it was because she had to work. In fact, everything about your departure had nothing to do with her!"

Dirk scoffed and let his hand fall to his side. "And you're gonna believe her over me?"

Oh shit… This was the question Al had been asking himself, and he didn't know how to answer it. His mouth seemed to be running on autopilot as the words slipped out without him really thinking about it. "Yes… I do." Dirk's eyes narrowed, but that couldn't hide the hurt. "She seems trustworthy enough. And she called me just to tell me you might not be in the best of moods." It sounded like a stupid reason to Al, but it was too late. The words were already said and done.

But now Al was rambling, the anguish in his chest sailing out as accusations. "So now I gotta ask, how many other times did you lie to me? Huh?" Dirk looked away guiltily. "That many?" Neither could bring themselves to face the other, and for some reason, Al felt it easier to make these accusations to a dirty floor. "So I was just… nothing to you, then…"

"No…"

Al continued, his anger erupting. "I was just a fuck buddy, wasn't I?"

He didn't have time to think as he felt himself suddenly shoved against the wall, lights blossoming before his eyes. "Excuse me?" The hiss smelled strongly of tequila, and Al wondered if he might have pushed it too far. "'Fuck buddy?' What the fuck would make you say that?"

The blonde realized that Dirk had him pinned in such a way that he couldn't fight back, not without severely hurting Dirk, and he didn't want that. Not really. But Al couldn't look Dirk in the eyes after what he had said. "It… it…"

"Look at me, damn it." Dirk roughly seized Al's chin and forced it upwards. Al blinked rapidly to clear the tears that had fallen before Dirk had made him look upwards, but it was too late. "Jesus, Al."

Dirk let go, his hand wet from the tears. Al just slumped backwards against the wall and let the tears flow. "Why?" Dirk couldn't say anything else, being too shocked that Al was actually crying, something he hadn't seen in over fifteen years.

"'Why?'" The question sounded froggy, so Al cleared his throat. "Maybe because it's true. All of it…"

"Well, if you'd just let me explain…"

"Fine! Explain away! It's not like I've got anything better to do." His tears had dried, and the redness of his eyes seemed to enhance his cold glare.

Dirk bit his lip and shot back, "You sound so fucking childish." But when Al exhaled sharply in response and looked away sadly, he apologized. "I'm sorry, alright! Will you just come sit over here with me?" His hand gestured towards the bed, and he waited for Al's response with bated breath.

Finally, Al nodded, and the two slowly walked to the bed and sat on it, their knees slightly touching. Dirk sighed and looked over at Al. His hand trembled as he reached to push away some of the hair that had fallen into Al's face. Al smiled faintly at the gesture. Dirk brought his hand back into his lap and inhaled. "So… what do you want to know?"

Al looked at him fearfully, his eyes wide, but it calmed and dissipated. Al's mind flashed with all the questions he wanted to ask, but Al made himself pick the one that was bugging him the most. "So is Eva lying, or are you?" It was the question that could stop all of this in one instant, if it was the right answer.

Dirk appeared to know this, too. He mumbled softly and apologetically. "Me…"

The nausea stirred again within Al, but he wrestled it down. "Okay… How long have you been lying to me?"

The brunette looked sadly up at Al and tried to catch his breath. "For… for some time now…"

Al was at a loss. "Dirk, I…" He stood up and floundered, feeling the tears start to well up again.

Dirk grabbed his shirt and coaxed him back down. "I had a reason…"

The anger that Al had insisted go away came back, despite his attempts to stay calm. "You had a reason to lie to your best friend? And what reason is that?"

Dirk's face contorted into an expression of fear, but finally it went away to be replaced by a pink tinge. "Because… Well, because I love you."

Silence.

"What?" Al's confusion was vocalized throughout the desert night, and he stared blankly at Dirk.

Dirk shrugged and tried to explain. "I mean… every time I went off with some woman, all I could think of was you and how I missed you. So when I got back, I'd make up some bullshit about her wanting to end it so that way you wouldn't know or… or hate me…"

"Hate you?" Al parroted. "Why would I hate you?"

Dirk rolled his eyes, annoyed with the fact Al didn't get it. "Because. I… love… you…" He enunciated each word with a jab of his finger into Al's abdomen.

Al laughed abruptly but stopped when he saw the hurt look on Dirk's face. His body was warming, and he grinned widely when he spoke. "And what would make you think that I don't love you back?"

A small smile danced across Dirk's face, but it was quickly replaced by a troubled frown. "Well, I wasn't sure… I always thought…"

"Thought what? That the reason I'd let you have sex with me or kiss me was because I was your best friend?" Al was still smiling warmly, the feeling in his body slowly returning.

The breadth of Dirk's smile increased. "Well, when you put it that way, it does sound stupid…I just thought that you felt forced… I dunno…" His eyes looked watery as he planted a kiss on Al's dirtied cheek. "I'm so sorry for lying, Al… And not telling you sooner."

The spot where he was kissed felt sunburned and electrified, so Al blushed but remembered the hurt look on Dirk's face just moments before. "And I'm sorry for being such an ass and jumping to conclusions and not trusting you more…"

"What a long list!" Dirk joked, so Al slugged him on the shoulder, causing both to laugh.

Al looked forward into the reaches of the dark room. "We haven't fought like that in a long time."

Dirk sucked in a breath and scooted backwards so that he could lean against the wall. "I dunno… That coffee argument got pretty heated, if you ask me."

"Coffee… OH!" Al suddenly remembered, giggling at the memory as he joined Dirk against the wall. He made a face and teased, "Well, I didn't really consider that fighting." Dirk shot him a confused look. "I… I thought it more of flirting."

They both laughed again, and Dirk growled, "Come here, you," pinning Al underneath him on the bed. Al made a squeaking noise and couldn't believe they were actually doing this the right way. The way he had wanted to for so long.

Dirk tentatively lowered his lips to Al's, moaning softly when they made contact. Al's eyes glazed over when he allowed Dirk entrance into his mouth, their tongues battling gently with the other. The taller man crept his hand up Al's chest and back down, making fluttering patterns with his fingers.

Al let his fingers wrap themselves in Dirk's hair, and he groaned loudly when Dirk's knee came up to rub softly on his groin. Reaching down, Al tried to start undoing Dirk's pants, just as Dirk was trying to do so with his own, and their hands knocked into each other.

They separated from the kiss, laughing. Each allowed the other to undress quickly before they were locked in a searing kiss once again. Al felt his mind go numb when Dirk's erection met his own and clutched blindly at Dirk's shoulders.

Dirk freed himself from the kiss and nipped affectionately at Al's neck, eliciting gasps wherever he went. Al felt the breath of his words before he heard them. "We're doing this because you want to, right?"

Al couldn't think of a response, so he let his body do the talking, bringing his hands up to pull Dirk back into the kiss, which he seemed to understand willingly. Al felt his legs be pulled to rest on either side of Dirk's body and whimpered when the kiss was broken. "I won't hurt you, I promise…"

The words were the truth, and Al felt better upon hearing them, even if he knew Dirk would never hurt him. "I… I trust you." His lips were swollen from the kiss, and his cheeks felt as hot as the sand was that day underneath his toes. Dirk smiled at him and gently thrust inwards.

Al yelped at first, forgetting what it was like in how long it had been since the lat time, but he silenced himself by biting down on his lip. Dirk looked concerned, but he pushed all the way in when Al nodded at him. Al released his breath and took Dirk's hand in his own.

Their fingers intertwined as Dirk pulled out and thrust in again. With each thrust, Al made a small moan of diminishing pain, which finally turned into a rasp of pleasure when Dirk hit his prostate. "Fuck…" Dirk then remembered that Al was not a woman and had a problem to be dealt with, reaching his hand down to grasp Al's erection.

Al's eyes went wide, and he tightened his legs around Dirk's waist, pushing against Dirk as hard as he could. His stomach knotted as Dirk continued to rock into him and kiss his neck endearingly. His free hand roamed up Dirk's back and rested in his hair once again. The scent of the tequila had worn off, and sex was pervasive in the desert air.

"Oh, God…" Dirk moaned against Al's neck, sending vibrations that went all the way down to the appendage he had hold of. Both men skyrocketed towards their orgasm, both fighting not to scream out for fear of discovery.

That didn't stop Al from tugging at Dirk's hair or crying out quietly into his lover's neck. And that didn't stop Dirk from squeezing Al's hand or whispering Al's name into the darkness.

And the definitely didn't stop either of them from wishing they could lay there forever, pressed into the other's body, regardless of the mess they had created. Because there, it was safe, it was home, it was true.

A/N I know, kinda cliché ending, but it's me! i have to end it with that, you know, ending that fits the title or something. Okay, so tell me what you thought if you want. Did it suck? Did I do okay? Are they in character? Anything, I'm desperate for constructive criticism. LOL!