Disclaimer: I don't own the XIII order... or most of the things that will be mentioned in this fic. -cries- I make no money off this...
Summary: Poor Vexen... All he wanted was a nap! One of Xigbar's time spells goes horribly wrong leaving him and the other order members with some pint sized problems... Pre-CoM
Warnings: OOCness, children (oh horror of horrors!), spelling and grammar errors, hints of shounen-ai, some Spoilers for XII Order members...
A/N: Here we go. Chapter 5! Vexen and Xigbar think Marluxia and Larxene are dead after they find the mess in the closet... Axel toils with his crossword puzzle, the unlucky trio are stuck in a room with Saix and Xaldin shows up. Thanks for all the sweets, I now have a secret stash to last me through the winter! ... or at least the next five minutes. XD
Axel: Not anymore! -cackles-
;; My tears, they flow like twin waterfalls... Oh well. Thanks for all the kind words. I feel wam and fuzzy inside!
Xigbar: That's probably just the muffins.
...You're probably right. Meh, so what if they are! Hope you guys enjoy!
- the critical blow
Bairn
By: the critical blow
Chapter 5: I'm on Break
"Oh...my...God."
Vexen resisted the impulse to fall to his knees when he found the mess in the supply closet. Xigbar and Vexen had led the two children with them on a search and rescue mission of sorts, praying they could get to Larxene and Marluxia before Saix could. They'd been headed toward the commons room when they'd heard Marluxia scream out for Axel and had followed the sound of his voice... only to find this hideous mess.
The door had been hacked to bits suggesting that the children had give Saix some trouble so he'd had to slice his way inside. There were cans scattered everywhere, some still intact while the others were dented or sliced open. The walls were stained with red suggesting a massacre but not without some sort of fight back. Xigbar twitched uncontrolably. How could Saix have done this to a couple of children? Sure he'd seen the man tear into armies, heartless and animal and human alike and come out victorious... but to do this to two children armed with nothing but cans!
"Grandpa?" Demyx asked. He didn't like seeing his granpda so distressed. And honestly, Vexen looked like he wanted to throw up.
"I think I'm going to be sick." Vexen groaned and covered his mouth with his hand.
"Where are Larxene and Maluxa?" Roxas asked as he clutched the front of Xigbar' coat tightly. Xigbar didn't answer him and just continued to stare at the thick red splattered against the walls. And Roxas didn't like it.
"Damn it Saix, I'm going to kill you." Xigbar growled. Roxas looked to Demyx and Demyx stared back at him. What had happened? Why were the adults so freaked out? Had something bad happened? Niether could possibly understand the sight before them.
All they saw was a big mess. Vexen and Xigbar began to walk off and Demyx followed after them.
'Marluxa, where are you?' Roxas wondered silently.
'I just hope they're okay...' Demyx thought.
And sadly none of them seemed to notice the hacked open remains of the red paint cans laying behind the box of used Lysol cans.
----
Marluxia was far from okay.
He was currently sitting bound and gagged in a chair in a small room covered in red paint with Zexion and Larxene on either side of him. The two were still passed out so he'd had to face the horrors of the scary man alone. The past half an hour was a bit of a blur to him, though the thirty minutes seemed like an eternity on fast forward to him, as he'd been dragged kicking and screaming to this place. He'd tried to call for his Ni-san earlier but he figured he was either too far away to hear him or he'd heard him and just hadn't reached him in time to save him.
When Axel didn't come he'd played opossum, falling over and pretending to pass out like the his friends and when the scary man had picked him up and carried him a ways he'd bit his arm in an attempt to make him drop him so he could run and get help but it seemed this man could feel no pain. He'd bit him hard enough to draw blood and he didn't even flinch. He just laughed and cotniued to drag him away. And then he'd brought them here. He'd tied them each to chairs.
"You're a monster." Marluxia growled. The man just stared at him blankly, all the scary craziness drained from his eyes, and cocked his head to the side.
"I know." He said simply.
When Marluxia started crying he gagged him before he left the room. And here he was now. Sitting with a black strip of cloth in his mouth, glaring at the wall, waiting for the strange blue haired man to return.
'Ni-san... where are you?' Marluxia wondered to himself, hoping against hope that his big brother would come and save him from this horrible place. Come and beat the tar out of the scary man and take this stupid gag out of his mouth. He was so busy glaring a hole into the wall and hoping Axel would find them that he didn't even notice Zexion wake up.
"Mmm... Where am I? And why does it smell like pee?" Zexion groaned softly as he slowly began to regain his senses. He remembered beating Luxord at poker and taking all his munny, meeting Larxene and Marluxia in the supply closet, getting chased into the closet by some scary man, the scary man hacking down the door to the closet, Marluxia pissing his pants and then diving to the floor to avoid getting skwered by debris and then... nothing. Wait. If the scary man had broken down the door that meant that...
"OH GOD HE'S GONNA EAT US!" Zexion scream as his pale eyes shot open. Marluxia jumped casuing his chair to scoot over and bump into Larxene's tipping it enough to fall over. Larxene let out a squeak as the chair hit the floor. Let's just say her chair falling over caused the other two chairs to fall over ending with all three children on the floor still tied to their chairs. Larxene had no idea where she was, why she was ties to a chair or why Zexion was religiously chanting 'He's gonna eat us!' over and over and over again. All she knew was that it was gving her a head ache.
"Zexion... shut up!" She snapped. The lilac haired boy payed her no mind and continued to scream.
"Shut up!" If only she wasn't tied to this chair she'd throw something at him. Marluxia stifled a groan and just glared at the ceiling not even noticing that the scary man had returned carrying several cups of something. The man walked over to them and stared down at them as a bit of that crazy gleam had returned to his eyes. Zexion looked like he wanted to spontaniously combust, Larxene went stiff, and Marluxia glared at him.
"I'm back." He said with a sadistic grin.
----
Axel glared at the offending crossword puzzle. He'd figured the whole thing out except for question 7 across.
He ran a hand through his firey red locks and growled in growing frustration.
"Curse you Twilight Morning Star! Curse you!" He yelled.
----
"Grandpa. Where's-"
"Don't worry Dmyx. We'll find them soon." Vexen said smiling reassuringly at he boy.
"But Grandpa-"
"We'll find them in a little bit." Demyx looked at him oddly and opened his mouth to say something else but just sighed and shut his mouth.
"I'm gonna kill him." Xigbar growled. He'd been chanting that phrase the entire time they'd been walking down the hall. Vexen had barely been able to keep the man from storming into Saix's room and murdering him. Once again Xigbar cared nothing for the children. But how could they return them to normal if Saix had ripped them to itty bitty shreds? Hell if he was gonna get in trouble with the superior he might as well take the pointy eared freak down too!
And that's when he noticed something. The little hand that had been holding his was... no longer holding his hand. Xigbar paused and glanced around the hall. Roxas was no where to be seen.
"Where's Roxas!"
"I though you had him!"
"He went that way." Demyx sighed pointing back down the hallway.
"Shit!" Xigbar yelled and ran back the way they'd come. Vexen glared down at Demyx.
"Why didn't you say anything?" Vexen asked.
"I tried to tell you Grandpa but you wouldn't listen." Demyx huffed and rolled his eyes. Vexen sighed but there was no way he was going to go after Xigbar. He had bigger things to worry about.
----
Xaldin sighed as he trudged down the hallway ready to wring Saix's neck in his hands. Things hadn't exactly gone as planned at the Fabled Countryside. He'd prepared himself for many things such as heartless and the beast amongst other things. Retaliation was one of them. And retaliation he'd recieved. But it was not the kind he was expecting. Guards he could handle. Dogs he could handle. Hell, he'd even be able to handle an army talking gekos trying to sell him insurance.
But furniture?
Oh no.
Furniture he could not handle.
And talking furniture no less. It was one thing to have cups fling themselves at you but it was another thing entirely when cups flung themselves at you screaming obsene things about your non-esxistant mother and rambling about Zigs and setting up bombs and other non-sense like that. He shuddered slightly as he remembered the lamp hopping up and down on his chest scream all his bases were belonging to it. And he would never look at apple pie or forks the same way again.
Or feather dusters.
His eyes twitched furiously.
He was going to kill Saix.
He was going to kill him slowly and enjoy every minute of it. He may be recognized as the unofficial second in command but he was still a lower rank than him. He should have gone on that damned mission. He should have been attacked by inanimate objects screaming about bases. And he should have had to bear witness to the horrifying act of a certain candlestick holder and a feather duster trying to create a new breed of household object. Or he should have at least sent Axel.
Axel would have gotten a kick out of that last one. So yes. He was going to kill Saix. But first he was going to get a snack. There was nothing like a cold glass of milk and a couple chocolatechip cookies to make the horrifying memories fade away. He walked into the commons room and past a tantrum throwing Axel, taking care to keep from getting burned, and made his way into the kitchen. It would seem the red head had attempted to do the morning crossword again.
He entered the kitchen and pulled out the milk. He poured himself a glass and set it on the counter before returning the milk to the fridge. And when he went to get the milk... he found it gone. He raised a single brow before he heard the sound of someone gulping liquid and looked toward it to find a young boy standing beside him...
Drinking his milk. Th boy didn't even acknowledeg him, just kept drinking his milk till it was all gone, and only after he had finished the white liquid did he look at Xaldin. Bright blue eyes met deep violet as the boy held the glass up to him and smiled brightly with a milk moustache across his upper lip. Xaldin recognized him imediately.
It was Roxas. Only he was much shorter. Several questions came to mind, most revolving around how the brat had become even younger, but he figured it had something to deal with Xigbar. It was just a hunch though.
"More milk, please!" Roxas said smiling cheekily. Normally Xaldin would have been shocked or he would have just walked away.
Or he would have said something harsh or asked questions or said no.
But today Xaldin had witnessed too many horrifying and strange things in the span of 2 hours so nothing he saw here could shock him.
Unless it involved Xemnas and the kareoke machine.
He took the glass from Roxas and opened the fridge again. He poured Roxas and himself each a glass of milk, grabbed the cookie jar, and sat down on a stool. Roxas took his milk and cookies eagerly and sat on the floor since he really couldn't climb up on the stool.
"Thank yew!" He chirped.
"Whatever." Xaldin said and began to eat his snack. His communicator beeped and he flicked it on.
"Yeah?"
"Xaldin, make your report." The superior's voice came through loud and clear.
"No can do." Xaldin said.
"What? Why not!"
"I'm on break." He said and flicked it off.
"Who was that?" Roxas asked.
"Nobody important."
----
A/N: Squueeeee! Crappy ending. XD The real Saix torture will begin next chapter. I mean Saix tormenting the kiddies. Chocolatechip cookies always help me through traumatizing experiences. Anyway, hope you guys liked it. Did anyone get the whole candle stick holder and feather duster thing? If you didn't I was reffering to Lumier from Beauty and the Beast. He was such a playboy. If you still don't get it watch the movie though there was no real appliance sex there. I'm a sad and sick 19 year old.
I'll get ch 6 out asap.
Whatever that means. XD