Disclaimer: I don't own the XIII order... or most of the things that will be mentioned in this fic. -cries- I make no money off this...
Summary: Poor Vexen... All he wanted was a nap! One of Xigbar's time spells goes horribly wrong leaving him and the other order members with some pint sized problems... Pre-CoM
Warnings: OOCness, children (oh horror of horrors!), spelling and grammar errors, hints of shounen-ai, some Spoilers for XII Order members...
A/N: I IS ALIVE! After many moons and much brain-deadness, school work, and art blocks I have finally gotten around to writing chapter 6 of this fic. Sorry I took so long everyone... Thanks for all the reviews.
So many...
After playing the game and hearing everyone's voices things got scuttled in my head. Another reason I took so long to write this. Hopefully this chapter won't make your eyes bleed that much.
- the critical blow
Bairn
By: the critical blow
Chapter 6: The "B" Word
"So... What happened to you?"
"Wha?" Roxas asked unsure what the man with funky hair was talking about. He watched as the man dipped his cookie into his glass of milk and took a bite. Hm... that looked like it might taste good. The man sighed.
"What happened to make you so... short." Xaldin asked with a partially raised brow. Roxas dunked his cookie into the glass of milk, following his example, and ended up spilling some on the floor.
"What do yew mean?" The boy asked. Xaldin decided to just drop it, it was obvious he couldn't remember. And the more he asked the more he'd get frustrated. He wasn't about to stoop to arguing with a child. It would be as pointless as Saix talking to Axel.
"...Never mind."
"Kay." Roxas said.
He watched as Roxas took a messy bite of the cookie. He'd gotten too much wet with milk so the cookie crumbled in his hands and fell to the floor. Roxas stared at the fallen cookie with sad blue eyes before he simply shrugged and picked up a fallen piece. Xaldin took it from him before he could eat it and Roxas let out a cry of protest. Xaldin knew the floors were usually clean but he didn't trust them enough to allow the 7 second rule. He didn't want to have a food poisoned child on his hands. Roxas watched as Xaldin picked up his precious cookie bits and threw them away.
How could he! Cookies were... cookies were good things! They made the world go round! How could he just throw them away like that!
Sacrilege!
"My cookie!" He cried as he stared at the trash cans.
"It was dirty." Xaldin said. Roxas' eyes watered and he opened his mouth to start crying but he soon found a cookie preventing it. Roxas would have glared at Xaldin but the cookie was far too tasty to ignore so he munched away at it.
"Better?" Xaldin asked. Roxas paid him no mind and continued to eat his cookie. Xaldin sighed in a mix of annoyance and reliefe. Crisis averted. Well for now at least. What was he going to do again? Oh yeah. He was going to go an kill Saix for sending him on that mission. A malicious grin spread across his face and downed the rest of his milk in a single gulp. He put his empty glass in the sink and was about to leave when he felt something tug at his cloak. Roxas held his glass up to him and smiled widely.
"Finished." He said simply. Xaldin put the cup in the sink and walked out of the kitchen and into the commons room. Axel was still fuming about the unsolvable crossword puzzle and Xaldin was not in the mood to deal with his whining...
...or to get burnt.
So he went snuck out the back way. He needed his rage for Saix not the red head...
---
Xemnas stormed down the hallway intent to give Xaldin a good long lecture about hanging up on him without reporting his progress. He really hated it when the others did that to him. He could care less that Xaldin was on break. Oh how he could really care less. They were so close to getting Kingdom Hearts, so very close now, and all Xaldin cared about was his damned cookies and milk! Nobodies had no time for cookies and milk! Not when victory was so close and the darkness was so much more appealing!
Ah... yes... darkness...
Xemans was so caught up in his thoughts on the darkness that he failed to notice the Order member he'd been meaning to scold walk by with a very bouncy blonde haired toddler following close behind him.
---
Saix grinned down at the now squirming children toothily. Now the sight of Saix smiling period was horrifying enough, or so Axel had told him, so he assumed this must have been terrifying. Marluxia glared up at him and growled something unintelligible due to the gag he'd placed in his mouth earlier. Larxene was torn between glaring daggers at Zexion and keeping an eye on Saix to make sure he didn't try anything. She seemed to be the protector of the group as she'd been the one to throw books and various other objects at him when he'd cornered them in the library. Not to mention she was the one all the others hid behind.
Zexion seemed to be babbling about someone going to eat them...
How on earth his fellow order members had been turned into children was beyond him. But that didn't really matter at the moment. All three were covered in red paint from the can's he'd hacked up trying to get at them. He'd have to get after Axel for not placing them in the basement like he'd told him to later after he'd thought up the proper punishment. Perhaps sending him to the pride lands? No he'd just think up all sorts of fun things to try there...
Maybe Land of the Dragons? No, they had plenty of cannons and fireworks and snow there... 100 Acre Wood? No... to many flammable things...
A grin came to his face as the perfect world came to mind. Atlantica. A world completely underwater.
No fire.
No fish stir fry.
No explosions.
Just water, terrible singing, and a very scared Axel. All the order members knew that Axel hated musical. The blue haired nobody had just barely begun to picture the look of horror on Axel's face when another loud outburst interrupted his thoughts.
"OH GOD HE'S GONNA EAT US!" Zexion scream. Saix couldn't contain it anymore so he asked the question.
"Who's going to eat you?" He asked calmly.
"The bear!"
"Bear?"
"The psycho panda bear man!"
"Psycho panda bear man?"
"Yep!"
"...Who's Psycho panda bear man?"
"...You is."
"..." There was a long moment of silence as Saix stared down at the lilac haired boy with a partially raised brow.
The other two children took this as a bad sign seeing as how quiet he'd gotten when they first pissed him off. Marluxia was too scared to breath and Larxene sorely wanted to beat Zexion to a bloody pulp. Surprisingly though Saix wasn't angry in the least. He just smiled at Zexion and pat him on the head.
"Those paint fumes must have really gone to your head." He said. Zexion smiled faintly all previous terror evaporating from his features as the larger man pulled his hand away from his head. Saix figured he'd finally calmed down enough or was so high from the paint fumes hed be easier to control now. He lowered his hand to untie the rope binding the boy to the chair but sadly he did it a bit too slow.
And thus Zexion bit him.
---
Xaldin continued to walk down the hallway in hopes of running into Saix so he could beat the blue haired man to a bloody pulp... But mostly to get away from the cheerful little bundle of... blonde following behind him. Roxas had been following him ever since he'd left the kitchen and it honestly didn't look like he was going to stop anytime soon. Xaldin had told him to go and hang out with his Axel seeing as how good friends they were but for some strange reason Roxas hid under the kitchen sink at the mentions of the red head's name.
"...Stop following me already." Xaldin sighed. He didn't even bother to look back, he could hear Roxas running behind him in an effort to keep up to him. So Xaldin quickened his pace.
He would have shoved the kid on the pyro but Axel was still throwing a fit over his now scorched crossword puzzle. And nobody, not even Roxas, deserved to face Axel during one of his crossword tantrums... It was far too painful, as he'd learned first hand, not to mention they'd be short a member. Organization XII sounded no where near as intimidating or as cool as Organization XIII.
And besides even numbers annoyed Xaldin.
Thus the reason he was #3.
Maybe that was why he and Axel never got along very well?
A yowl of rage erupted from down the hall as Axel seemed to have realized he had just destroyed the very thing he had spent most of the morning trying to solve. Roxas squeaked and latched onto his leg obviosuly frightened Axel might come after them. However Xaldin didn't even seem to notice him as an explosion rocked the building signifying that Axel had left the common's room.
'Damn drama queen...' Xaldin thought to himself bitterly as he rolled his eyes. 'I'm not cleaning that up.'
He still had no idea how Roxas had been turned into a toddler but he was sure he'd hear all about it soon enough. He'd been tempted to shove the brat on Xemnas but he knew all too well that Xemnas wanted nothing more than to give him another boring lecture on how he was not to dismiss his superior's requests and how darkness was so much better than cookies, which was a total load of bullox, and he was in no mood to listen to it today.
What had he been meaning to do earlier...?
Oh right...Kill Saix for sending him to that horrible place. Kill him slowly and painfully... He grinned at the thought his previous rants and annoyances forgotten. Summoning his spears he stalked down the hall toward Saix's room with the full intent to skewer him alive.
"Oooo..." Roxas said as he saw the spears appear around the man who had given him cookies. It was then that he noticed the man had picked up his pace. And honestly... Roxas didn't want to be left alone. Not with fire man and the monster man on the loose. And seeing as Mr. Eyepatch was no where in sight his best bet at safety was this guy.
Not to mention he wanted to see if he could wheedle some more cookies out of him.
"Wait fo me!" Roxas yelled and chased after him.
---
"Roxas! Where the hell did you go you little twerp!" Xigbar yelled as he ran down the hall. Saix could wait for now, he'd kill him later, but now he had to find Roxas before someone else did.
That someone being the Superior.
He'd practically torn this place apart with the exception of the commons room and the other order members rooms. He doubted the kid had managed to get down stairs... Maybe he'd gone back to the library? No... He'd just come from there. Dammit all! Where was he!
"Any luck?" Vexen asked with a smug smile on his face. Demyx was sitting on the floor beside him intent on staring a hole into the floor. He seemed to be entertained but with what Xigbar had no idea. And he had a feeling he didn't want to know. This was the 5th time he'd passed them in the last 10 minutes. Suppressing a growl as well as a stream of curse words, Xigbar settled for a glare and shook his fist at the scientist before running off toward the commons room.
"...I'll take that as a no."
---
"You know... You should have waited for him to actually untie you before you bit him." Marluxia sighed. His gag had been removed due to the fact that it was now being used to restrain Zexion, which Marluxia supposed was blessing in disguise. But he had to give Zexion some props for trying. The boy had a powerful set of teeth on him. Larxene however was not pleased with him in the least and felt Zexion was a complete and total, if not a somewhat brave, idiot.
And brave in the stupid kind of way.
Larxene glared at Zexion with a look of pure venom. Zexion lowered his head in shame of his own stupidity. At the time it had seemed like a good idea but now it seemed he'd just landed himself and his friends in ever worse trouble than they'd been in before. The scary man had decided not to kill them just and have a little fun with them before he chopped them up into itty bitty pieces. He had left the room again to prepare the diabolical torment he'd thought up for them and Zexion could only imagine what it was...
Those thoughts included penguins, sporks, and prunes but mostly clowns... Zexion hated clowns.
The door opened causing Larxene to squeak, Marluxia to growl and Zexion to jump. Luckily though their chairs had been moved farther apart so they couldn;t knowck eachother over like they had earlier. The scary man grinned at them mockingly and Marluxia glared at him warily. The man passed him and went straight for Zexion's chair, dragging it toward the door he'd just come from. The other two looked on helplessly while they silently thanked God he hadn't picked them first.
"Mmm mmphm mph?" Zexion asked through the gag.
"What's going on? Two words for you... Bath. Time." The man said. Zexion's eyes widened in horror.
---
And somewhere down stairs Lexaeus woke with a start, swearing he could have heard Zexion scream in a very high pitched voice.
----
A/N: Panda... don't ask.
Xemans likes darkness.
Lexaeus will come out again later on. I just felt like adding that. Sacrilege is a fun word to scream at random people... I just wanted to have Zexion bite someone in this story... Since he's got no weapon he's gotta have some natural defense mechanism right? It was either primal instinct or squid ink. Bath time equalsdeath to most small children.
I ramble.
zomg... crap chapter. I make chapter 7 better... I promise. ;-; -crawls into dark corner to die-