The Banana 2-

Well, here is the entrance of the...drum roll...Banana! Here you go!

By the way, I'm not sure if I spelled 'Carmen Miranda' right, which was mentioned in the 2nd Season, in "Parallel Universe'.

Mentioned is the potato chips, Lays. They do not belong to me, and I give the makers full credit.

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Lister found Rimmer and Kryten sorting through a pile of chips. "Aaah, there you are! Finally! Glad you can make it this life-time." Rimmer smirked at Lister.

Lister rolled his eyes, and ignored Rimmer. "So, Kryten. What ya want me to do?"

"Ah, sir! We just need to sort through the supplies, then take them up to the ship cupboard. Then, we can restock your refrigerator. With Mr. Rimmer not being able to pick up anything, I thought it would go along quicker with you helping."

"Yes, and I will record what we have, as you guys bring it on up. Use the stairs." Rimmer ordered Lister and Kryten. "Why the stairs, and not the lift?"

"Are you kidding! You could crawl up the stairs, one in every year, and get there before the lift would."

"And where is that stupid creature, Cat? It would go a lot more quicker with him helping. Knowing him, he's probably in front of a full length mirror, brushing his hair, and picking out what clothes he is going to wear each day for the rest of eternity. Then, he's probably making plans for the next suits and outfits he is going to sew and make! Then, off to find accessories to match everything. No one has even dared to undertake what he will be, since Carmen Miranda did that whole fruit business!

"What is your problem, Rimmer? We'll get him to work, but I don't see why you care soooo much!" Lister shot at Rimmer as he picked up a pile of 'Lays' potato chips. Kryten picked up bags and bags of the potato chips, Crunches.

"I have things to do, m'laddo! I'm going up the up the ziggurat, lickety-split! Tickety-boo! I can't wait all day long, for you and Toilet Bowl to haul things up, not when help can be found and used. I could be revising, or doing something useful and important!" Rimmer stated as he wrote on his hologramatic clip-board, recording the chips.

"Yah, you can snuff it. You would be useful not yapping all the time with your big gob. It's important because you won't be distracting us from our VERY important, crucial duties!" Lister chuckled as he picked up already buttered cinema popcorn.

"Yah, and if these are VERY important duties, there was really no Big Nose." Holly intervened.

"Shut the smeg up."

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Lister stepped away from the microwave with a bowl of popcorn. He slipped into his chair, next to Kryten. Cat sat next to Kryten, with Rimmer at the far right. Holly was on a monitor next to Rimmer.

Lister reached the bowl over to Cat, who took a handful. They were watching the movie, The Lord of the Rings.

"So, which movie in the series is this again!" Cat asked, sounding very confused.

"Ah, I believe, this is the 21st century movie from the Lord of the Rings. My data banks say this is the 2nd movie in the set of 3 motion pictures. Processing... ah, yes, The Two Towers, directed by Peter Wragg."

Lister looked at him crazy. "Are you sure, Krytie! I thought it was...Paul Jackson!"

Cat wiggled his finger at Lister, nodding.

Music swelled in the background, the theme to the Lord of the Rings. Mountains scanned cross the screen, and voices from the 1st movie come to be heard. Lister and Cat opened up their lager. Rimmer sipped at his hologrammatic beer, as Kryten and Holly gulped down on some 'android brew'.

A scene from the 1st movie started to play. An old geezer was hanging off of a reddish cliff. A little guy runs to go save him, but a bigger man grabs him and holds him back. The little guy screams, "Gandalf!"

Rimmer looked up, confused as smeg. "Who has actually seen the 1st movie!"

Cat shrugged, Holly's eyebrows raised, and Kryten shook his head. Lister spoke up. "I have, at least I think. I can't remember, I might have been drunk."

The others sighed.

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Lister hiccupped as Kryten fell out of his seat, laughing. Gimli's voice echoed over the screen, as he counted how many Orcs he was killing. Kryten had found that VERY funny. Rimmer's drunken face saddened as he saw Aragorn rush up to the dying elf, Haldir.

Boy, were they all drunk! They were all having a good time, and they started forgetting what was happening.

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Gollum hissed his lines, as Holly snored. Lister kicked the layer of beer cans away from his feet. Boy they were past drunk. Holly was unconscious, and Lister, Cat, Kryten, and Rimmer were past watching the movie.

Lister and Cat were hungry, and they were coming up with crazy ideas to eat.

"Oooh! Pizza with onions on it! Noooo...spinach." Lister slurred.

"Wow! No, we should eat it with Goodwill clothes on!" Cat gulped. All sense of fashion were lost out the waste disposal, along with Lister's first round of throw up.

"I wonder who invented 'Goodwill'! I bet he named it after himself!" Rimmer asked no one in particular.

"Sirls, Me believe owner was named... Howard Goodall." Kryten slurred, his proper enunciation gone, like Rimmer's charm.

"Nah, that ain't it!" Cat said, crumpling up a bag of Thin Mints, as Lister nibbled at a Crispy chip.

"No, I want a BIG banana! Dipped in chocolate! Mmmm! No, dipped in salsa! Nooo, that won't do!" Lister tried to figure out the topping he wanted with his order of Big banana!

"Oooh, Maple syrup!" Kryten suggested.

"Where we gonna git big banana!"

All 4 of them looked behind them, where the large yellow, plastic banana, hung by the corner by the door.

They grinned. They had found there food! Lister remembered when and how they had 1st gotten that banana.

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Peter Wragg and Paul Jackson was mentioned instead of Peter Jackson. The Lord of the Rings is not mine, and I was just borrowing some scenes. All credit to New Line Cinema, and Peter. I just said it was a different name to be funny. Peter Wragg is the Visual Effects Designer for Red Dwarf, on the BBC. Inside joke. I know, there are a lot of them in here. Watch out for them! And Paul Jackson was the Executive Producer. Both inside jokes! Howard Goodall is the music director. All in good fun. I have no IDEA who started 'Goodwill', so I can't really give credit to him/her.

If you don't know, Goodwill is an American store, with cheap clothes, toys, etc. for people who can't afford stuff. Not POOR, but you get the point! People give them their unwanted stuff. You don't get paid for it, but you can get a tax refund paper, that takes some of your taxes away, because you gave to Goodwill.

I'm not sure what Holly would drink to make herself drunk. So bare with me!

Aah, the emergence of the banana. The next chapter will be a flashback to how, where, and when they got the banana!