Whew! This one took a while, but I think it was worth it. But seriously, guys and girls, I'm writing blind. I need to know if the characters are getting, well, out of character. When I say I need reviews, I mean I want critique of my writing. Spare me a moment more of your time and put in something you think was good or bad, or needs fixing. I spend a day or two writing each chapter, and all I want in return is your enjoyment and a little critique to improve my writing so you can all enjoy even more. A few seconds after reading is all I ask of you.
After all, I do want to become a writer.
… Why are you all laughing?
Well, here's chapter eleven! Enjoy.
Whoa, whoops. Review responses first.
celeste: I do believe your suspicions may come true… but you have to read to find out. I'm glad that you reread, because I added stuff to the story that wasn't there before, and with that I clarified certain things. If you write something and then look back on it six months later, you'll often find there are a thousand things you want to change, which was my case. And thank you for the compliment.
Virtue: Yes, I probably enjoyed writing the snowman scene as much as you enjoyed reading it. And I'm happy that you're into it again! This chapter is probably going to murder all you people out there, but that'll just make the next chapter more worthwhile. I think. Keep on reading, Virtue, 'cause I enjoy your support.
Now on with the chapter.
………
Chapter 11: World's Closest Shave and a Cut
The road Borus had taken led directly into the center of the city. He found it entirely baffling how they were deep underground, yet a sun shone brightly in a sky and clouds decorated the blue. He decided it was magic.
Daily life bustled around him; vendors on streets, families doing their business among said vendors. Minstrels sat on various objects, plucking merry tunes on their lutes and flutes. Well-dressed persons who looked as haughty as the Councilors of Zexen carried papers from one area to another. Couples sat outside restaurant talking of the daily news or whatever crossed their minds. Borus had to make sure he was not caught looking about in wonder. He had to fit in.
He passed many soldiers like himself. Few waved, many nodded, and he mimicked what he saw. He found himself wandering through a Vinay del Zexay–– one that was underground. He also found that the underground city was many times the size of Vinay del Zexay. It would make the Councilor's jealous.
He turned a street corner and noticed there were only soldiers on this street. They were all gathered and listening to a man with a blue ribbon tied around his arm. Borus joined them as quietly as possible and listened in on their discussion.
"… and so you must proceed carefully. They could be anywhere, and they are dressed as us. Ask each and every soldier you see for his or her badge. Should they show it, give them one of these." He held up a very bright orange ribbon. Bandits with white arm-ties passed out a cluster of these to each soldier. A tall and muscular one (from what he could see of the man, for the outfits hid almost everything) shoved a bunch at Borus, and he took them slowly.
"What's wrong, boy, they won't bite! Har har har!" The man laughed at his own joke before turning to another soldier. The man at the head of the gathering continued.
"Remember, every soldier must be accounted for. The intruders must be found!"
Borus froze.
So that is what this is all about. The other soldiers around him cheered the man with the blue arm-tie. "For the Black Bandits!" he called.
"For the Black Bandits!" the soldiers all called back, raising their arms in the air and shouting. Borus numbly raised his arm with them, but his mind was elsewhere. I have to warn the others!
……
Percival rubbed a hand back and forth across his chin underneath his mask. "I need a shave," he stated dumbly. Chris raised an eyebrow, adjusting the saber at her side, though otherwise ignoring the comment. Percival removed his hand from the mask and steered his horse closer the side of the road. Chris followed.
They had followed a main road through about half of the city, and were as awestruck as Borus was. They passed a park, healthy and green under the odd sun. Within dogs barked happily as owners tossed a stick; families picnicked near a softly lapping pond, and an elderly woman fed swans. Chris watched the people with an impassive look. But Percival knew that she wished she were one of them. Out of war, out of battle and blood shed, a dream in its own.
An odd feeling passed over him, as though he were being watched. Chris seemed to feel it too. They both glanced behind them, and sure enough, another bandit in black was riding behind them, an orange ribbon tied on tight. In one of his hands was a large amount of the same orange ribbons, though it looked as though there had once been more. The bandit noticed them looking, and called out.
"Halt! Hold up!" That was all Chris needed to hear before squeezing her horse's sides and picking up the pace. Percival was right with her, and they turned a corner. They entered a deserted alleyway and headed for its entrance onto another street. But the man in black was right behind them, and to their horror, another one appeared in front of them from the other street.
"Shit." Percival looked back and forth between the two before wildly reining his horse down another branch of the alleyway, Chris following right behind. Both bandits followed them down the narrow alleyway, and there was barely room for two horses to move side-by-side. Percival moved through the maze of paths, turning left, then right, then left, then left again. Chris did all she could to keep from falling off her horse as she followed recklessly after him, though she feared they would have to split up eventually.
Eventually never came.
"Damn it all, a dead end!" Percival found himself saying. He turned his horse around in the tight space, as did Chris, and they both unsheathed their swords. The first bandit came around the corner. He looked as though he meant to speak, but the second swerved around the corner, panting heavily.
"You there! What do you think you're doing? Show me your identification!" The second one said. The first one looked back and forth between Chris and Percival, and the second bandit. "I said show me some identification!"
Chris and Percival looked at each other, steeled themselves, and turned back ready to fight. But the first bandit held up a hand to the second before they attacked. "These two have badges. They just showed them to me. Were you as good on your horse as you are with demands, you would have been here to see them." The second growled, unsheathing his own saber from his side. The first held up his hand again, farther out this time. "You mean to fight your own? Save it for the Zexens."
The second spat before sheathing his sword and wheeling his horse around. The horse's hoof beats faded, and the first bandit turned back to Percival and Chris. "Glad to see you two are okay." Chris and Percival exchanged confused looks. The bandit seemed to realize, and pulled off his mask. Golden locks fell from beneath it, and a handsome face to boot. Borus smiled at their surprise. "Thought you two would like to know that our presence is known."
Percival sheathed his saber with a mumble of, "We figured as much." Chris let out a sigh, casing her sword as well. Borus cast his gaze over her; no harm done, he concluded. He suddenly remembered the orange bands in his hand and gave them one. Percival eyed them curiously.
"What are these for?" Chris asked, voicing Percival's thoughts.
"Put them on; they will mark you as having your badge."
"Badge?" Chris asked, wrapping the orange tie around her arm. "I was not aware we needed one," she said dryly.
"As long as you have these orange ribbons, it will be fine. I can explain everything later. We must continue on before we are discovered." Borus pulled his mask back over his head.
"I wonder how the others fare," Chris asked, though mostly to herself. Percival and Borus glanced at each other, deciding something in their secret language, before exiting the alley. Chris followed.
"We are lucky we had you," she heard Percival say to Borus up ahead. "That was a close shave." His hand went back to his chin. ""Much closer than I needed."
……
They were almost upon the enemy base. It rose tall above them on a dangerous looking cliff. The majority of people in the area were now soldiers rather than townsfolk. None of them gave the three standing idly a second glance. A long road wound up and around the cliff, and with a nod of their heads, they continued up the road. Everyone there had an orange band; some had both orange and white, very few with orange and blue. They stopped at the top of the rise, and the structure rose above them. It was a castle of sorts, and though nothing like Brass Castle, it was still gigantic.
"Milady," Borus said urgently. She looked, and he pointed at the entrance. Everyone who entered showed their badge to the guards at the door. "How are we to enter?" Chris opened her mouth to speak, but words never came.
"You there!" The voice directed at the three scared them. They turned to see a man with a blue arm-band. He looked up at them from the ground. "What do you think you're doing? We don't have time for dilly-dallying, you get your asses to the stable then get inside." When they did not move, the man grabbed the reins of all three horses, two with one hand, and dragged them to the stables, which were to the right of the entrance. He yelled at them every other second, and they left their horses tacked but cozy. "Now hurry up! His Lordship doesn't have all day!"
He shoved them back outside then toward the entrance. The guards at the entrance, holding menacing looking pikes, crossed the pikes over the doorway as they tried to get through. Percival and Borus looked at each other nervously. Then the man came up behind them and thwacked the guards on their heads with the hilt of his saber. "Let us through, damn it, the speech is about to start!" The guards did not lower the pikes.
The man with the blue arm-tie became furious. "Here's my damned identification!" He pulled out a badge, and the pikes were uncrossed. "Now hurry up," he said to the three bewildered knights. He pushed them through the entrance, and they suddenly found themselves in a throng of other soldiers, all heading to a large room. A sort of stage stood at its head. The soldiers, including Chris, Borus, and Percival, were organized into lines facing front. Everyone quieted down as the great oak doors at the back closed and a man on the stage stood. He wore no arm-band, but a cloak with its hood drawn up.
Chris remembered the feeling as he cast his gaze on everyone in the room. The gaze of the cold and unseeable, non-human eyes driving into her own. She shuddered slightly, and the cold that had engulfed her before returned. Whenever she blinked, she remembered the feeling of her rune losing control, the hopelessness, and Borus cry of pain when the shard of ice had shot out from the ground. There is no doubt about it, she told herself, this is the man that led the attack that day. She was sure of it. The feeling passed over her, and the cloaked figure spoke.
"Soldiers of the Black Bandits! I call you here today to discuss the matters of intruders." Percival's eye twitched, though no one saw. "As of now, there are still three on the loose. We have captured two." The bandits cheered at this. "And, we have caught a spy."
The figure turned around and brought forth a bound and gagged man in Harmonian attire. Chris could not believe it. Harmonia? How is Harmonia involved in this? Some soldiers around them booed while others murmured to each other uncomfortably. The figure placated their calls with a wave of his hand.
"Though he may be of our own kin, as we were once Harmonian, we are not anymore, and he is now the enemy. Harmonia has betrayed us! We must strike back against them, and we will. But the Zexens come first. Now, find the remaining intruders! Do a badge check on everyone without orange. Check the alleyways and city edges.
"Should you find them, bring them here to me. I will deal with them. Remember that I want them alive! Now go, find them! Our next great battle will be soon! This War of Liberation will end in our victory! We will free the world of its chains, in the name of the Black Bandits!" The soldiers cheered and wildly applauded, chanting "Black Bandits" over and over again. Then they filed out of the room, assembling in groups and going out on a search.
"So they have been captured," murmured Chris when the three found a safe place among the other bandits to talk.
"It seems that way," agreed Percival. "Perhaps they were not lucky enough to get their hands on either a badge or an orange ribbon."
"Well we cannot leave them here," stated Chris, glancing around to be sure they were not being watched. "They may torture them for information; those men were trained for reconnaissance, not torture. We have to get them out." Borus nodded his agreement, but Percival was thinking.
"Suppose we get caught?" he speculated. "Then what? We'd have no one to give what information we already have to Salome to use if necessary, and no one to even tell what has become of us." He let the two take this in. "I will head back to base and have Salome send for reinforcements. There must be thousands here ready to fight, and we've only five-hundred, give or take a few." Chris bit her lip, but she knew he was right.
They said their goodbyes, and Percival left through the large oak doors after handing Borus something. Chris and Borus followed shortly after, though they headed blindly further into the castle (rather than out of it) in hopes of stumbling upon their comrades. After nearly an hour of searching, they had long since realized that the castle was much bigger than it seemed.
"This is getting us no where," Borus whispered quietly. "We are in the dark here."
"Any bright ideas then?" Chris responded, smirking at her own pun. Borus visibly flinched.
"I may have one, in fact," he said smugly after a moment. He pulled the white ribbon Percival had once possessed from a pouch at his side and tied it around his arm above the orange, as he had seen others do.
To Chris's shock, he roughly seized her arms and put them behind her back. She automatically resisted, not realizing a soldier was passing by. The soldier looked at them in curiosity. "Stop resisting, spy!" Borus ordered of her. He turned to the guard while Chris still struggled against his strong grip. "Excuse me, I just caught one of the intruders." He grunted when Chris elbowed him in the side. "His Lordship ordered that she be placed within the prisoner cells. I'm new here––" he stopped to adjust his grip, "Where are the prisoner cells?" The soldier eyed Chris curiously, before responding.
"Awfully odd that a greenie be in white rank, eh? But mayb' that's just 'cause yer good." He paused. "Take a left up 'head, then go straight 'till you reach some stairs. At the bottom's the dungeons, if that's what His Lordship be meanin' by 'Prisoner Cells,'" Borus nodded his thanks before shoving Chris (gently, she thought) in the direction the soldier had pointed. As soon as they rounded the corner, Borus released his grip on her, and she rubbed her wrists tenderly. Borus dropped to one knee.
"Milady, I deeply apologize for my disrespect to you in that situation. I do not know what came over me and will accept any punishment you feel is necessary." He waited, eyes shut, as though he expected Chris to sock him one in the face.
"Rise, Sir Borus," she said firmly, though her eyes smiled. "You did well to do as you did. If not for your quick thinking, we may have never found the location of the dungeons."
"But Lady Chris, I––"
"I said rise, Borus." He did. "Now let us help our soldiers. They must be safe, and they may have information that would prove useful to us." Chris began to walk down the hallway, and Borus, feeling as though he had done something inexcusable, hung his head low. He followed her, but realized he was lucky. If it were someone–– anyone else–– who had been in Chris's shoes, his head would surly be on the ground, the Captain's dog's chew toy. He was quite lucky, he understood, to have Chris.
The hallway ended abruptly and stairs wound deep into the earth. Chris did not pause at their start, though she proceeded carefully at their end. The dungeons were a collection of barred cells, about twenty of them on each side of the room. They cautiously walked down the length of the room glancing into each cell to look for the Zexen prisoners.
"Something is not right," Chris spoke as she reached the end. "These cells, all of them are empty. There is no one here."
"Ah, but on the contrary," spoke a voice from the shadows. "You are here, are you not, Lady Christine Lightfellow, and Sir Borus Redrum.".
"Who's there?" Borus bellowed toward the shadows. "Show yourself, coward!"
Christine? Chris thought idly. No one has called me that in ages. She jumped back as the cloaked figure from the stage seemed to mold from the shadows.
"Do not worry, your friends are safe and sound, though from now on that entirely depends on your cooperation." From the same shadows the figure had appeared from, twenty soldiers emerged and surrounded the two knights in disguise, closing in. They seemed to move too fast to be human. Blue bands ornamented their arms. The figure cackled insanely.
"I'm looking forward to working with you, Miss Lightfellow."
………
Ho ho ho! Sorry to leave you guys in suspense like this, but I'm hoping it'll be worth it by the end of the story. When will that be you ask? Certainly not the next few chapters, I'm afraid.
The next chapter will be a bit gruesome. I'm not exactly sure how it's going to come out yet, but it'll have a bit of blood. My "Teen" rating may not cut it, but I'll warn you at the beginning of the chapter if need be.
Actually, I'll warn you now. The next chapter will be rated M for MATURE. I know because it's already done. I like being a chapter ahead.
If you did not read my starting notes to the chapter, please read them now.
Thanks for reading, folks. Stay alive; the next one'll be a doozey!