CHAPTER 18

It was a short drive to the restaurant, the two of them making nervous, casual small talk the whole way, before they parked the car in front of the restaurant. It wasn't Marcus' vehicle - God knows he couldn't afford a car - but after around half an hour of swearing at him and forcing him to top the car up with gas from his own money, his dad had let him borrow his. They stepped out of the dirty, beaten down pickup truck and walked into the restaurant, taking a seat in a booth.

"So… this place looks interesting." Marcus remarked, as he looked around, never having been there before. "Why do they call it Breadsticks though?"

Almost as soon as the question left his mouth, a waitress came over and set down the largest plate of breadsticks Marcus had ever seen in front of them.

"Never mind." Marcus commented.

"Yeah, they're obligated to give you unlimited breadsticks. Last year, Santana brought a whole wheelbarrow and forced them to bring her more and more breadsticks until she had filled the entire thing up." Quinn replied. "Breadsticks is like the restaurant to go to in Lima. Everyone from McKinley comes here, especially on first dates."

Marcus' eyes fluttered downwards, avoiding Quinn's gaze for a while, before he eventually looked back up. He saw a slightly confused look on Quinn's face as she noticed his reaction to the word 'first date', but it quickly passed.

"What about you? What's dating like back in Canada? You must've been quite a heartbreaker." She remarked, assuming as much due to his good looks, but at the same time curious to hear the answer. There was almost… jealousy. But that was crazy, right? They weren't even together yet, Quinn told herself.

Marcus chuckled.

"What's dating like in Canada? Um… I wouldn't know actually. This is the first date I've been on since… well ever."

Quinn's jaw dropped in shock.

"You've never been on a date before?!" She shouted. Marcus laughed and shook his head.

"Please, shout a little louder. I don't think my old friend who moved back home to Shanghai, China quite heard you." Marcus remarked. "No, I haven't been on a proper date before. Not unless you include when I was a 12 year old in Middle School, going to Baskin Robbins with a girl in my class."

"What? H-how?" Quinn stammered. Marcus shrugged.

"Well our moms took us there and paid for the ice cream, so there wasn't much to…"

"Not the Baskin Robbins date, you idiot! How have you never been on a date before?"

Marcus again shrugged. He didn't really know what to say. On one hand, the truth was that his mom had died just before he had entered high school, and after that point he hadn't gotten close to anyone since. But he wasn't about to lay that bombshell on Quinn right then and there. As far as she knew, his mom died when he was too young to remember it, and he planned to keep it that way.

"I don't know. Never really wanted to, I guess. I was more than satisfied with the friends I had. Didn't really feel the need for a girlfriend on top of that, as I was happy where I was."

For a few moments, Marcus held his breath, anxiously waiting to see if she bought the lie. Thankfully, her face soon broke into a small smile, setting to rest his nerves a little. Quinn couldn't help but feel a little happy that he hadn't dated anyone before. She already felt insecurities about dating Marcus given that he didn't care about her social status, and having to measure up to other girls was something huge she feared. At least that, she didn't have to worry about.

The rest of the date ran pretty smoothly. They talked some more, learned more about each other. Quinn got to hear snippets about what Marcus' life was like back in Canada. She noticed that he steered clear of any mention of not just his mom, but his dad too. Quinn asked him about it and Marcus just put it down to the fact that him and his dad weren't that close, which wasn't exactly true. Because they were. They were close, but just not in a normal father-son way. Marcus knew his dad loved him, knew his dad would do anything for him. But at the same time, his dad was extremely tough on him and only ever accepted the best from him. Straight A's, captain of the Rugby team… he demanded Marcus do it all. He wasn't afraid to call Marcus out and insult him for his mistakes, and they rarely ever celebrated his achievements. But Marcus was fine with that. It worked for him. He was a pretty tough guy, so was definitely able to handle his father's toughness. He knew his father was proud of him. He just didn't want Marcus to rest on his laurels and get lazy, as he figured would be the case if he complimented Marcus too much.

Marcus, in turn, learned all about Quinn's past. When Marcus asked about Quinn's past before McKinley High school, she didn't answer, but instead reached into her purse and pulled out a small photograph, sliding it across the table towards him. Marcus picked it up and looked at it for a moment, before looking at Quinn, confused. She was just showing him a random photo of some overweight red-head girl?

"This is me." Quinn told him, her heart racing as she spoke. She couldn't believe she was doing this. Couldn't believe that on just a first date, she was revealing all of this about herself. But she couldn't hide it from him. Couldn't lie to him. If this was going to be different to her past relationships, then she needed to be honest with him. "Or rather… who I used to be. 4 years, 80 extra pounds, a nose job and a dye job ago."

Marcus looked at her, even more confused, as he held up the small photograph and then held it beside her face to compare. It took him a few seconds, but he finally realized it.

"Oh I see the resemblance now!" Marcus exclaimed, gleefully. It took him a little while, but he could finally begin to see the similarities between Quinn and the girl in the photo. Quinn nodded, on the verge of tears.

"Look, I get it if you hate me, but I swear…"

"Hate you? Why would I do that?" Marcus asked, genuinely perplexed at this comment from Quinn.

"I'm a fraud!" She cried. "I'm an ugly, fat fraud!"

"How? Because you dyed your hair like pretty much every American woman at some point?" Marcus remarked, not at all fazed by the comment and speaking in a quiet, calm, soothing voice. "You lost weight? Started exercising? How is that something to be ashamed of? If I had managed to have such an incredible transformation, I'd be bragging about it 24/7."

"You don't have to say that, Marcus." Quinn murmured, looking down in shame. Marcus shook his head.

"Believe me. Don't believe me. It's up to you." He told her. "And as for the nose job… I've played Rugby for 10 years, Quinn. We don't wear helmets and protection like your football players do. Chances are between scars, broken noses and every other injury I've gotten, I've had more cosmetic surgery in the past decade than you ever will. You have nothing to be ashamed of, trust me. Me personally, I personally think, provided back then you were the same person on the inside you are now, you would've been just as awesome. But if you feel prettier now, that's what matters. It's like my dad always says… you might be a worthless, hopeless piece of shit destined to go nowhere, but at least wear that crown with pride."

Quinn raised an eyebrow in shock.

"You think I'm a worthless, hopeless piece of shit?" Quinn asked. Marcus shook his head.

"No. My point being you can't change who you are. You also can't change how others look at you. But if you are who you are without being ashamed of it, it makes everything a lot better."

Quinn slowly nodded, understanding his point. Before she realized something…

"Wait… your dad said that to you? Isn't that kind of mean?" Quinn asked. Marcus shook his head.

"Nah. That's just the type of person he is. He's an… interesting character." Marcus responded.

"Sounds like it."

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The rest of the date went pretty well. They finished eating, paid and left the restaurant. But despite that, they didn't really want the night to end yet, so they decided on a casual walk through the park as they continued to talk. Quinn grasped Marcus' arm and huddled close to him for warmth in the October chill, but their proximity and closeness to each other didn't change the fact that they were both thinking the exact opposite from the other. Quinn was thinking about the fact that this was far and away the best first date she had ever been on. It had been everything she had imagined it would be and more, and it was taking everything she had not to pull him into a passionate kiss right then and there. But less than a few inches away, Marcus was filled with nothing but a wracking guilt. As the date had progressed, as it seemed to be going better and better, Marcus knew one thing for sure: he shouldn't have come on this date. With every second that passed, he knew it was going to be inevitably that much harder to let Quinn down. He needed to suck up the courage and do it now, or else he risked hurting Quinn really badly.

Suddenly, Marcus stopped walking and came to a halt in the middle of the park that him and Quinn were walking through. Quinn also stopped and turned to face him, slightly confused. Marcus took a deep breath. He was going to do it now. He had to.

"Quinn, I need to…"

However, halfway through his sentence, he was interrupted as Quinn leaned in and kissed him. Marcus was immediately consumed by shock, so there was little else he could do than kiss back. The pair broke apart right after though, more for the need of air than anything else.

"Wow." Quinn whispered quietly, almost to herself. "That was amazing."

Marcus closed his eyes. This was going to be horrible, no doubt about it. But he needed to rip the band aid off or who knows if he ever would?

"I'm really sorry but I can't do this, Quinn." Marcus murmured. Quinn's immediate reaction was quiet laughter. She thought he was joking. After all, she had nothing to tell her otherwise, as they had just finished their amazing date. Well, nothing to tell her otherwise, other than the solemn look on Marcus' face. As she caught a glimpse of it, her eyes widened as she realized he was being serious.

"Wait… what?" Quinn asked. Marcus shook his head.

"I'm really, really sorry, Quinn. This was a mistake. I never should've come tonight." Marcus said, before turning on his heel and leaving Quinn, a bundle of shock and confusion, behind him…