Part 11: The Broken-Hearted
Baltimore, Maryland
"This is my first time in therapy"
Ellie Bartlet shifts uncomfortably on the couch, unable to keep still. She pushes her wavy blonde hair out of her face and behind her ears.
"Are you nervous?" Dr. Stevens asks.
"No," she answers, quickly. "I'm just…uncertain. I don't know if this is going to work out"
"Why is that"
"I'm not sure therapy is right for me as of this moment. Plus, I don't have a lot of time on my hands"
"Why did you come in the first place"
"A few reasons," Ellie replies. "I'm sure you've heard about the thing with my parents"
"Yes"
"And I haven't been able to talk to my mother. I can't bring myself to"
"But you've spoken to your father?" Dr. Stevens questions.
"Almost everyday, which is how I usually am with Mom"
"Are you upset with her"
"I feel like I shouldn't be, like it's not my place to judge. But yeah, I am upset. I don't know what's wrong with her, but I don't like it. I wish she would just come home"
"Do you feel like this is a personal attack on you"
"I don't know. Sometimes. I know it's not, but it's hard not to think so. This is between her and Dad, I realize that. It has nothing to do with me. But it's affecting my family in a big way, and I can't help but feel betrayed. It's horrible, I know"
"It's not horrible," Dr. Stevens says. "It's perfectly normal to feel that way"
"Yeah. I guess. I mean…she broke my dad's heart, but she broke mine too! I don't think she understands that. There's more to this whole situation than just her and Dad. And Zoey's not much help"
"How do you mean"
"Sometimes I think Zoey supports the relationship between my mother and Anthony Prescott. You know, just because she's dating his son. So I feel like Zoey's betraying me too. Is that selfish? I'm making it about me. That's selfish"
Dr. Stevens shakes her head.
"No, Ellie. It's not selfish"
"Do you think I should talk to her?" Ellie asks.
"I think you should talk to her when you're ready. Right now, you obviously aren't. Wait awhile. Keep coming to see me and you'll progress much faster, and more thoroughly"
"Is that just your wallet talking"
"No," Dr. Stevens laughs. "I truly think it would do you good. You don't have to come every day, and you probably won't still be coming a year from now. But as it is, I think it would be in your best interest"
"You think so"
"I do"
"Well, okay. I'll take your word for it"
Washington, D,C.
"I have this fear," Jed Bartlet confesses.
"Go on," Dr. Adams coaxes.
"It's like a recurring nightmare. It plagues me every night, in one form or another. Sometimes the details change, but the idea is the same"
"What happens"
"Well…I'm dead"
"You're dead"
"Yes," Jed says. "I keep having these visions of me dead. No particular cause of death, I'm just dead. I could be the MS, or it could be some freak accident. Anyway, that's not important. I'm dead and it doesn't much matter to anyone"
"Not anyone"
"Nope. Not a one. And Abbey finds out about it on the morning news. Nobody even thought to tell her, because they didn't think she'd care. She shrugs it off, marries Tony Prescott, buys a house in Switzerland like she's always wanted to, and invites all our children and grandchildren for a party. To celebrate my death, most likely"
"That's interseting," Dr. Adams comments. "Why do you think that is"
"I have no idea. Why do you think I'm sharing it with you"
"Do you think that's how Abbey would react upon hearing of your death"
"She better not!" Jed exclaims, with surprising intensity. "You'd think thirty-eight years with a person would"
"Would what"
"I don't know. It's just…the thing that gets me about the dream is, I die without ever seeing her again, without having seen her for months! I don't get to tell her anything, speak my last words to her, none of it. I die not knowing whether or not she still loves me. And that's worse than dying"
Dr. Adams suppresses the urge to respond when he notices a stray tear slide down his patient's cheek. The President of the United States' cheek. He is astonished.
"Sir"
"I'm fine," Jed says, struggling to regain his composure.
"Are you"
"Yeah. Just give me a minute"
"Okay"
"If I died, you know…she damn well better have a broken heart," Jed states, in a whisper.
"What was that, sir"
"I said she better have a broken heart when I die"
"You don't think she will?" Dr. Adams asks.
"I think she needs to get her ass back here so I can find out, that's what I think"
London, England "You know what I did last night?" Abbey asks, giggling like a schoolgirl.
"What?" Dr. Hewson smiles back at her.
"I went to a drive-in"
"Really"
"Tony took me to this drive-in…Lord, I don't even know where it was. Do you know how long its been since I've been to a drive-in? Forty years"
"What did you see?" Dr. Hewson asks.
Abbey pauses for a moment, in deep thought.
"I honestly can't remember! Isn't that crazy? I can't remember"
Dr. Hewson laughs.
"Most people don't remember what they saw at a drive-in. I believe that's the entire point behind the premise"
"Could be"
Startled, Abbey flinches when she feels her purse begin to vibrate beside her. Dr. Hewson watches with interest as she grabs the purse and frantically searches the insides.
"I'm sorry," she says, pulling out her cell phone. "It's my sister. I'll just be one second"
Dr. Hewson places his notepad and pen on the table beside him and folds his hands in his lap. Abbey flips her phone open and presses it to her ear.
"Julia, what's going on? What? What is it? Julia, honey, talk to me please. Tell me why you're crying! Dad? What about Dad? Julia! What. He…no. No. He…can't. I…oh, my God"
Before she has a chance to build up a wall of protection, the tears begin to fall at a rapid. Dr. Hewson sits up, observing her intently.
"I can't…I don't…oh, God. Oh, no. Okay, okay. All right. Yeah. Yes. Okay. Love you too. Bye"
Abbey flips the cell phone shut and drops it back into her purse, then looks up at Dr. Hewson vulnerably.
"Uh…my father died this morning. Heart attack. And I…I have to go back home."
Ellie Bartlet shifts uncomfortably on the couch, unable to keep still. She pushes her wavy blonde hair out of her face and behind her ears.
"Are you nervous?" Dr. Stevens asks.
"No," she answers, quickly. "I'm just…uncertain. I don't know if this is going to work out"
"Why is that"
"I'm not sure therapy is right for me as of this moment. Plus, I don't have a lot of time on my hands"
"Why did you come in the first place"
"A few reasons," Ellie replies. "I'm sure you've heard about the thing with my parents"
"Yes"
"And I haven't been able to talk to my mother. I can't bring myself to"
"But you've spoken to your father?" Dr. Stevens questions.
"Almost everyday, which is how I usually am with Mom"
"Are you upset with her"
"I feel like I shouldn't be, like it's not my place to judge. But yeah, I am upset. I don't know what's wrong with her, but I don't like it. I wish she would just come home"
"Do you feel like this is a personal attack on you"
"I don't know. Sometimes. I know it's not, but it's hard not to think so. This is between her and Dad, I realize that. It has nothing to do with me. But it's affecting my family in a big way, and I can't help but feel betrayed. It's horrible, I know"
"It's not horrible," Dr. Stevens says. "It's perfectly normal to feel that way"
"Yeah. I guess. I mean…she broke my dad's heart, but she broke mine too! I don't think she understands that. There's more to this whole situation than just her and Dad. And Zoey's not much help"
"How do you mean"
"Sometimes I think Zoey supports the relationship between my mother and Anthony Prescott. You know, just because she's dating his son. So I feel like Zoey's betraying me too. Is that selfish? I'm making it about me. That's selfish"
Dr. Stevens shakes her head.
"No, Ellie. It's not selfish"
"Do you think I should talk to her?" Ellie asks.
"I think you should talk to her when you're ready. Right now, you obviously aren't. Wait awhile. Keep coming to see me and you'll progress much faster, and more thoroughly"
"Is that just your wallet talking"
"No," Dr. Stevens laughs. "I truly think it would do you good. You don't have to come every day, and you probably won't still be coming a year from now. But as it is, I think it would be in your best interest"
"You think so"
"I do"
"Well, okay. I'll take your word for it"
Washington, D,C.
"I have this fear," Jed Bartlet confesses.
"Go on," Dr. Adams coaxes.
"It's like a recurring nightmare. It plagues me every night, in one form or another. Sometimes the details change, but the idea is the same"
"What happens"
"Well…I'm dead"
"You're dead"
"Yes," Jed says. "I keep having these visions of me dead. No particular cause of death, I'm just dead. I could be the MS, or it could be some freak accident. Anyway, that's not important. I'm dead and it doesn't much matter to anyone"
"Not anyone"
"Nope. Not a one. And Abbey finds out about it on the morning news. Nobody even thought to tell her, because they didn't think she'd care. She shrugs it off, marries Tony Prescott, buys a house in Switzerland like she's always wanted to, and invites all our children and grandchildren for a party. To celebrate my death, most likely"
"That's interseting," Dr. Adams comments. "Why do you think that is"
"I have no idea. Why do you think I'm sharing it with you"
"Do you think that's how Abbey would react upon hearing of your death"
"She better not!" Jed exclaims, with surprising intensity. "You'd think thirty-eight years with a person would"
"Would what"
"I don't know. It's just…the thing that gets me about the dream is, I die without ever seeing her again, without having seen her for months! I don't get to tell her anything, speak my last words to her, none of it. I die not knowing whether or not she still loves me. And that's worse than dying"
Dr. Adams suppresses the urge to respond when he notices a stray tear slide down his patient's cheek. The President of the United States' cheek. He is astonished.
"Sir"
"I'm fine," Jed says, struggling to regain his composure.
"Are you"
"Yeah. Just give me a minute"
"Okay"
"If I died, you know…she damn well better have a broken heart," Jed states, in a whisper.
"What was that, sir"
"I said she better have a broken heart when I die"
"You don't think she will?" Dr. Adams asks.
"I think she needs to get her ass back here so I can find out, that's what I think"
London, England "You know what I did last night?" Abbey asks, giggling like a schoolgirl.
"What?" Dr. Hewson smiles back at her.
"I went to a drive-in"
"Really"
"Tony took me to this drive-in…Lord, I don't even know where it was. Do you know how long its been since I've been to a drive-in? Forty years"
"What did you see?" Dr. Hewson asks.
Abbey pauses for a moment, in deep thought.
"I honestly can't remember! Isn't that crazy? I can't remember"
Dr. Hewson laughs.
"Most people don't remember what they saw at a drive-in. I believe that's the entire point behind the premise"
"Could be"
Startled, Abbey flinches when she feels her purse begin to vibrate beside her. Dr. Hewson watches with interest as she grabs the purse and frantically searches the insides.
"I'm sorry," she says, pulling out her cell phone. "It's my sister. I'll just be one second"
Dr. Hewson places his notepad and pen on the table beside him and folds his hands in his lap. Abbey flips her phone open and presses it to her ear.
"Julia, what's going on? What? What is it? Julia, honey, talk to me please. Tell me why you're crying! Dad? What about Dad? Julia! What. He…no. No. He…can't. I…oh, my God"
Before she has a chance to build up a wall of protection, the tears begin to fall at a rapid. Dr. Hewson sits up, observing her intently.
"I can't…I don't…oh, God. Oh, no. Okay, okay. All right. Yeah. Yes. Okay. Love you too. Bye"
Abbey flips the cell phone shut and drops it back into her purse, then looks up at Dr. Hewson vulnerably.
"Uh…my father died this morning. Heart attack. And I…I have to go back home."