Well, here's part number 3. This is, by far, the funniest part. Of course, that's just my opinion. I mean, I couldn't stop laughing while I was writing it...

Hey...today's my Grandma's birthday...

Anyway, enjoy, you guys!

Disclaimer: I own nothing. So, don't sue.

RECAP: Naruto and Sasuke have had a...tête-à-tête with Neji. They ran away cuz he was gonna kill them and have now decided to ask Mitarashi Anko, the proctor of the second part of the Chuunin Exam, to be part of their pimpy circle. So, it's off to the Jounin Lounge!

Not Happening-Prostitues:

Tsunade

Tenten

Ino

/The Jounin Lounge/

(A/N: Yes, I did make up the "Jounin Lounge". So, don't freak and think that it's a real place in the show or manga that you didn't know about…)

It was about six o'clock, and some of the Konoha jounin decided to meet in the Jounin Lounge to have some food. What kind of food? Well…it was Asuma that had to make it…so, it was…ramen. Yeah, Sarutobi Asuma couldn't cook to save his life…

"Ramen?" Yuuhi Kurenai asked, cutting her eyes at Asuma.

"Um…sorry…Kurenai?" Asuma answered, rubbing his head and shrugging.

"Oh, please Kurenai," Anko scoffed. "It's not like you could do any better."

Kurenai got ticked. "Oh, really? Well, at least I can actually make something other than friggin RAMEN!"

The whole room cowered slightly at the fuming kunoichi. When kunoichi get mad, they get mad.

"Kurenai-chan? Are we being visited by our special friend of the month?" Asuma asked, taking a step closer to her. Kurenai glared daggers at him. Asuma got scared and cowered behind Gai.

So, who were the jounin that decided to get together and eat Asuma's ramen? Well, there was Asuma, of course, Kurenai, Anko, and Gai. Kakashi was supposed to be there, too, but I think we all know why that didn't work out…

Just then, two little shinobi burst into the room. All the jounin gasped, but just brushed off the intruders and started to eat the ramen when they realized that it was just Naruto and Sasuke. The boys put on fake astonishment at being ignored and counted as unimportant by the older ninja.

"So, boys, why are you here?" Asuma questioned, slurping his ramen.

"Well, we came here to find Anko-san. And, look, there she is, right, Naruto?" Sasuke answered, looking to his comrade.

Naruto was drooling at the sight of all the jounins' ramen.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and slapped the back of Naruto's head. "Snap out of it!"

"OW! Sasuke-teme!" Naruto yelled, rubbing his poor head.

"Why are you looking for me, kids?" Anko inquired, stopping the fight that was about to ensue by the two boys.

Sasuke looked away from Naruto and to Anko. "Well, we need to ask you a question. But, it's kinda personal , so can we talk in a more private setting?" He put his cutest face on to try and persuade Anko. It was kinda unnecessary, because she was going to go with him anyway , but it was cute…

"And can you come, too, Kurenai-san?" Naruto asked, deciding to kill two birds with one stone.

Kurenai set her ramen down and stood up, joining Anko. "Um, sure, Naruto-kun. I'll come."

Sasuke, Naruto, Kurenai, and Anko walked out of the room and went to an empty conference room across the hall, leaving the men to ponder…Oh, dear God…

"So. What do you think that was all about? Huh, Gai?"

"Who knows, Asuma. Those boys were trained by Kakashi, after all. They could be up to anything…"

Asuma blinked several times. "You talking rape, Gai?"

"WHAT! No! I didn't say that! God, you're friggin sick! You are worse than Kakashi, Asuma! Oh, my God!" Gai yelled, smacking his head on the table. Asuma blushed furiously, and went back to eating his ramen…

In the conference room, Sasuke and Naruto had set Kurenai and Anko down in a couple of chairs. Taking seats of their own, they both decided to handle this very…business like. Just like real pimps would! Naruto elbowed Sasuke, signaling that Sasuke should be the one to do all the talking. Sasuke nodded in agreement, Naruto would probably just screw everything up anyway…

Clearing his throat, he began. "So. The reason that Uzumaki-kun and I have brought you two here is to give you two a proposition."

Anko and Kurenai exchanged looks of bewilderment before Kurenai responded, "And this 'proposition' of yours would be?"

"We would like you two to work for us and be prostitutes!" Naruto butted in, pushing Sasuke aside.

Anko and Kurenai's jaws dropped. Remember that whole thing about kunoichi and getting mad. Yeah, that doesn't really apply here right now, cuz they were not only surprised and confused, but they were ticked. Well, hell hath no fury like that of an offended woman…or kunoichi, in this case.

"YOU WANT US TO BE WHAT!" Anko and Kurenai screamed simultaneously, standing up furiously and grabbing a couple of kunai.

Naruto and Sasuke sat silently, wide-eyed and scared out of their poor, little minds. When they saw the kunai, they understood what was about to occur and shot up out of their seats as well. They began to slowly back up towards the door. But the scorned kunoichi weren't going to let those sick, little brats get away that easily. They lunged forward and barely missed them. They sprinted out of the door and ran back to the shinobi in the room across the hall.

Asuma and Gai had heard Kurenai and Anko screaming, and had hidden under the table in pure horror of what happened to Sasuke and Naruto, and what would happen to them when the two came back into the room. When they heard the door nod turn and the door burst open, they took it upon themselves to start screaming like little girls. What morons…

When Sasuke and Naruto ran in to hide behind Gai and Asuma, they saw no one and heard little girls. Following the scream, they crouched to observe under the table, where they found their 'saviors' screaming in fear of Kurenai and Anko. Once the older shinobi realized that it was just the boys, they jumped up, hitting their heads. After crawling out, cursing their headaches, they each clung to one of the boys saying how they thought that they were killed by ravenous the kunoichi. The boys stared at the older, crying shinobi as if they were crazy, which, coincidentally, wasn't all inaccurate.

Then, a thought hit Naruto. "Umm, BusyBrow-Sensei, shouldn't you be with your team…in the forest…?"

Gai's crying ceased. Blinking furiously, he then remembered his team was waiting for him. "Aw…DAMN!" he cursed, beginning to totally freak out. Regaining his cool, or whatever he had of some, he pulled out his 'nice-guy pose' and said, "Well, you guys, it's been fun. But I have to be on my way and join my ever youthful team! However, I shall return. All in good time. Stay youthful and give my apologies to the ladies!" and with that, there was a puff of smoke. After it cleared, Gai was gone, and it was just Sasuke, Naruto, and Asuma. However, they hadn't realized how close to death they were. Well, Naruto and Sasuke were, anyway.

Kurenai and Anko had stealthfully snuck into the room and crept up behind the boys. Readying their kunai for the strike, with Kurenai behind Sasuke and Anko behind Naruto, they gave each other a quick nod before they grabbed the boys' shoulders with their free hands. Naruto and Sasuke yelped at the sudden contact. Turning them around to face them, Kurenai and Anko glared harshly at the two boys. Asuma had snuck away to the back of the room to avoid death by kunoichi. Naruto and Sasuke gulped and began to attempt to free themselves, but quickly stopped once the women raised their kunais to signal that they had the power.

"So, you wanna ask us to be whores again, boys?" Anko asked, a sadistic grin on her face.

"No ma'am!" they answered frantically, tears beginning to pour out of Naruto's eyes. Sasuke wasn't crying, but you could clearly see the fear in his eyes. Kurenai could be scary even without saying anything.

Naruto dropped to his knees, crying his poor eyes out. "PLEASE! Just let us go and we'll never bother you or ask you to be whores ever again! We promise!" He sobbed louder.

"It's true! Just please! Let us LIVE!" Sasuke pleaded, whimpering alongside Naruto.

"Well, Kurenai? What do you say? Do we let them go?" Anko asked, turning to her partner in crime.

Kurenai smirked. "Sure. I think we've traumatized them enough. You can leave now, boys."

Sasuke and Naruto rose quickly to their feet. "Oh, thank you merciful women!" they praised, hugging Kurenai and Anko before dashing out the door. The two women turned to see that Asuma has poofed out of the room, leaving just them and the ramen. Shrugging, they went back to the table, eating the rest of the ramen and laughing at the events that had just occurred.

/Back with Naruto and Sasuke/

"Well, damn!" Sasuke cured, kicking a soda can in the way. "What the hell are we gonna do? It's 6:30, we have to meet Kakashi-sensei at 8:30 tomorrow morning with prostitutes, and we can't find anyone willing to be one!"

Naruto shrugged. "I don't know, Sasuke. But, I'm hungry! You could've at least let me take some of their ramen for the road!"

Sasuke sweatdropped. "Do you ever think of anything other than ramen?"

Naruto thought hard. Then with a huge smile, he answered, "Nope."

"Figures," Sasuke mumbled, returning to kicking the stupid can.

There was a moment or two of silence.

"So, can we please go and get something to eat? I'm starving!" Naruto complained.

"Fine! Let's just go to Ichiraku's. We'll eat, then come up with some kind of plan for our situation," Sasuke suggested, sighing deeply.

"YAY!" He jumped up and down happily. Grabbing Sasuke's arm for the millionth time that day, Naruto proceeded to drag Sasuke to Ichiraku's Ramen Bar for some dinner, Sasuke's treat, of course.

Kay, if I had included the part where Sasuke and Naruto are at Ichiraku's, this part would have been a hell of a whole lot funnier.

Oh, and I'm not really a feminist (Ya know, the women who are all 'Women rule the world! Bow to them!'), so the whole thing of Sasuke and Naruto begging for their lives from the all-powerful Anko and Kurenai is just for laughs.

So...see where it says 'Review This Story' down there? You should totally do it. Just saying.

-LGF ;)

Updated:4/28