B.K

I just couldn't keep my mouth off of him. I just couldn't keep myself from tarnishing his perfect innocence. How is any gay male supposed to keep their hands or lips off of him? He's one of the hottest guys I've seen in my life. I don't even know how I waited an entire month to just…touch him. I guess I should thank Chris Hobbs for giving me the chance to spend some alone time with Justin. But, I probably made a huge mistake. Justin had fucking freaked out on me and I don't know about you but that's not usually a good thing. No one has ever freaked out when I've kissed them. This is a first.

So, it's predictable, the next morning that Justin doesn't even so much as glance my way when I sit down next to him for first period. Daphne raises her eyebrow at me and I just shrug. If Justin hasn't told her about me kissing him yet she will hear about it. Whenever Justin's ready to tell her. Or maybe I should just spare her the waiting and tell her myself.

"New assignment, kids."

God, doesn't the fucking teacher know that we're seniors. Not kids. I glance over at Justin but he continues to stare ahead and pay Mr. Cato his full attention, hands folded on the desk but I know that he's perfectly aware of me looking at him. He never pays this much attention in class. In any class. Rolling my eyes at his…stupid attitude, I look up and listen as the teacher explains our assignment.

"Whoever you're sitting next to will be who you're working with,"

I glance over at Justin to see if he's having a fucking cow. Surprisingly, he's not.

"I'll be assigning a different piece of literature to each of you and you'll both read it together and have to tell me about it in seven page essay, no less than that. Alright – Daphne Chanders and Derek Holmes: Romeo & Juliet. Justin Taylor and Brian Kinney: The Odyssey. Chris Hobbs and…"

I glance over at him again. He's fidgeting with a strap on his backpack. I contemplate on asking him what the hell he's so freaked out about. He enjoyed it. I can feel and I definitely felt him responding. I definitely felt his mouth moving against mine. I definitely heard him make a silent moan inside my mouth. And I know I felt his dick getting hard against mine so I don't see what the problem is. After Mr. Cato gives all the students their assignment he passes out the literature to each of us. Our book is pretty old and ratty.

I look over at the silent blond.

"We'll have to work at your house."

There's no way in hell that we're going to my place. For the first time this morning Justin looks over at me. He even manages to hold eye contact. He slowly nods. "That's fine." I cross my arms over my chest and roll my eyes. "How's your stomach?" He's silent for a moment and I look over at him. His skin is becoming slightly flushed and he runs a hand quickly through his hair. During the month that I've known him I've learned all of his nervous habits. He'll bite his thumbnail or his bottom lip. He'll run his hand through his hair repeatedly. He'll just have this…look. He's easy for me to read.

"It's fine, thanks. So is my nose."

That's nine words he's said to me all morning. Maybe we're getting somewhere. I nod, tipping backwards in my chair. "That's good. Did your mom freak?" I've heard a one or a million stories about Jennifer Taylor. Stories from how much she loves Justin to stories about how protective she gets over him about certain things. Like bullies. Justin complains incessantly about how protective and worrisome she is about him. He complained because he's seventeen and doesn't think his mother should worry. I wish my mother worried about me, not that I would actually tell anyone that.

"She wasn't too happy when I told her what happened. I gave her the cleaner version, leaving out profanity and…stuff."

Stuff equaling Brian trying to rape me in the bathroom.

I nod, smiling slightly.

"Did your dad threaten to knock Chris's head off or something?"

Justin never talks about his father. Whenever I bring him up the blond always manages to change the subject before the discussion can get too far. Justin swallows, strange expression falling onto his face, and his body shifting uncomfortably in his chair. "My father wasn't home. He isn't home much." That's something I can't relate to. My dad's home all the time. I wish he wasn't home all the time. Maybe Jack should get together with Craig Taylor and they could go out together instead of staying home with their sons. "Oh, well, did your mom?" For the first time, the blond smiles. It's only slightly though.

"My mom's not exactly butch enough to do something like that. Or violent enough."

I nod, smiling over at him. Maybe things won't be so bad after all. Unless we're alone together. Justin will probably never let me be in the same space alone with him again. Fuck, I wish he'd at least tell me why he was so freaked about the sexual contact that had happened yesterday. "I would have done more. Then shove him on the floor I mean. If we hadn't been at school at the time." Justin smiles softly at me once more and shrugs. "Thanks, but, you did enough to help me." I'm not sure if he means this as a bad thing or a good thing so, I decide to ask. I've always been one to say what I was feeling. Well, most of the time anyway.

"Is that a good thing or bad thing?"

The blond pauses a moment, biting his lip. Then,

"It's a good thing…"

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking."

J.T

"Is there something wrong between you and Brian?"

I look over at Daphne, the two of us sitting on her bed doing our homework for today. I shrug and choose not to say anything. Is there? Sure, I had totally freaked out in the bathroom yesterday when Brian had kissed me. It wasn't that I hadn't enjoyed it. God, I had thoroughly enjoyed it. I had wanted it to last longer but…I freaked. I'm not sure exactly why I did but…I did and that's the end of the story. Maybe it's because I'm scared of the whole relationship thing. Last time Daphne got dumped by someone she had "loved" she hadn't been the same for several weeks.

I don't want to end up like that.

And then there's the fact that I'm totally inexperienced. Why would Brian want someone that doesn't know anything about relationships, sex and dating? Sure, I know about it all but I don't know. If that makes any sense. Daphne places her pencil down on her spiral notebook and raises an eyebrow over at me. Sensing her drilling stare, I glance up from my work and try to act as innocently and unknowing as possible.

"What happened?"

"It was yesterday…in the bathroom…"

"What happened?"

She suddenly looks very interested. I can only imagine what her dirty mind is thinking up.

"He kissed me."

"Oh. My. GOD. Are you serious? Is he a good kisser? Did you kiss him back? Did you enjoy it? What'd you say afterwards? What'd he say? Did,"

I throw my pencil at her causing her to clamp her mouth shut.

"Yes, I'm serious. Yes, he's an excellent kisser but I don't have anything to compare him to either. Yes, I kissed him back…after a few seconds of being frozen. Uh, yes, I mean…I guess I enjoyed it…a lot. I actually…ended it. I completely freaked, Daphne! I ran out of that bathroom as fast as I could telling him I had to get to class. So…I didn't really give either of us a chance to say anything…I'm such an idiot."

"You're such an innocent little boy, Justin."

"I'm not an innocent little boy."

She raises her eyebrow at me again.

"What?"

"You are too innocent."

"Fine, you're right. I have the sexual age of a fucking elementary school student. You don't have to rub it in."

B.K

I dial Justin's number hoping my father doesn't hear the sounds of the phone. He's asleep, drunk out of his fucking mind, on the couch downstairs. It's better when he's asleep. Much, much better. Four rings later the blond answers his phone.

"Hello?"

"Justin? It's Brian."

"Oh, um, hey."

"I was thinking, this weekend, Friday, tomorrow, which is tomorrow, maybe, we could get together and read 'The Odyssey' together…at your house. Or somewhere."

"Uh, yeah, that's fine. Uh – you wanna just come home with me Friday that way you don't have to drive. I could always give you a lift back home after we've had enough reading."

"Sure, that's fine. G'night, Sunshine."

"Night."

I hate fucking awkwardness. I hate him being awkward. Sighing, I throw my face into my pillows and the phone drops to the floor with a loud thump. I'm sure it sounds louder than it really is. I lie stock still and hear my father's snores cease. And then heavy footsteps striding up the stairs. I can almost hear his heavy breathing as he gets closer and closer to my door.

I am so fucked.