Disclaimer: Well... it's floating around in this fic somewhere...
Kuroi-chan's Disclaimer: The nickname Sagi-chan is copyrighted to Kuroi. Any other who uses it will be mocked, laughed at, and will ultimately suffer at the hands of her vengeful and depressing wrath. That and she'll nag me into yelling at you.
Saaski-chan's disclaimer: The nickname Leeni-chan is copyrighted to Saaski-chan. Use it and die.

AN: Well, I really don't have much to ramble about right now – but I think you should all thank my boss, because if she hadn't sent me home early tonight, you wouldn't have gotten this chapter. And I didn't want to post it until I got a round 300 reviews, but I decided: "Che', I've got 298 – that's pretty close, right?" So – read and enjoy, I guess.

(Additional Authos Comment, feel free to skip: I was feeling self important and was wondering if I were to create a fan-club for myself, who would join it? Heh, sorry, random thoughts that make me feel special and arrogant. (blush). I'll shut up now.)

Chapter 13

For lack of anything better to start this chapter with, the author has decided to recap the school year thus far. Strangely enough, only four days have occurred during this school year - but the author is guessing nobody has figured that out yet. Now, one might recall that the first day of school involved a random freshman being squashed by fan girls, and Shukaku possessing Gaara's body for the second time in this fic. Thus, giving Gaara the power of sand. Also on the first day, Iruka-sensei began the first battle in a war with pigeons, and Neji became extremely perverted. Shikamaru was also introduced as the resident bi character.

On the second day of school, Jiraiya-sensei took his class on a trip to Happy Homes: A Center for the Incurably Insane. Sasuke's insane brother and another new character named Ino were revealed to the frightened Live Experiences class.

Day three involved Gaara gouging out a roomful of staring eyes with his new ability to control sand. And day four involved a brief introduction of Kyuubi, the near explanation towards Ino's insanity (which will be ignored for now), and the (long over due) Gaara/Naruto moment.

Horary!

So, now that everybody is bored with the authors ramblings, the story line will now continue (after a brief flashback) and the randomness will continue as it always does.

Flashback: And Gaara? Well, he managed to not only convey his feelings to Naruto, but also contract the flu.

Actual storyline: Now, it was natural for Naruto to feel extremely guilty about getting Gaara sick. So, he labored, and labored that night, making the most special gift he could think of for Gaara.

"Shikamaru!" Naruto cried, pounding on the front door of the Naru household. "Help meeee!"

An extremely sleepy looking Shikamaru opened the door and proceeded to yawn.

"Naruto, it's five in the morning," the boy complained before yawning again and slumping in the doorframe.

"I- I know..." Naruto said, looking sheepish. "But... Gaara's sick and I don't have a car... so will you drive me to Gaara's house please?"

"What makes you think I have a car?"

Naruto was silent, his blue eyes teary and pleading.

Shikamaru chanced opening one eye, and immediately regretted it. Why was he such a sucker for blonds? And blue eyes? And that pout? Curse his bad luck! Curse it to Happy Homes and back!

"Let me steal my dad's car keys..."

--

Twenty minutes later found Naruto and Shikamaru standing on the front stoop of Gaara's house. Naruto was ringing the doorbell, as he had been for the last three minutes, and Shikamaru was staring up at the clouds, still cursing his bad luck.

"WHAT?!" An irritated voice snarled. Wolves howled in the background. Naruto and Shikamaru looked up and revealed to their eyes a blond haired, blue eyed girl.

Shikamaru's eyes widened, a bit of something - quite possibly drool - dripping from his mouth and his knees quaking.

Naruto grinned. "Temari!" He said, bouncing on the balls of his feet happily.

"Naruto-kun," Temari said, scowling at the bouncy blond. Wolves howled in the background. "You're here to see otouto-kun?"

"Yes!" Naruto beamed.

In the background, wolves continued baying at the not-currently-present moon. "Who's your friend?"

"Naru Shikamaru!" Naruto grinned, grabbing Shikamaru's arm and pulling his friend forward. Shikamaru stumbled slightly in his fear-slash-awe of the blond girl.

"Hmm..." Wolves howled some more - if anything to just be annoying. Wolves', annoying... somehow that just doesn't seem to fit as well as the author wants it to. Oh well!

Chirp. Chirrrrp.

"Is Gaara in his room?"

A brief nod, to keep the wretched beasts of hell silent, sent Naruto and Shikamaru into the house and up the stairs towards Gaara's room.

"Why..." Shikamaru started to say in a low tone. "The wolves..."

"Temari - that's Gaara's older sister, by the way - well, when she was born, her soul was fused with a wolf's soul. About two weeks later, she got annoyed with it and kicked it out of her body. So, now she's forced to play mother for a pack of wolves. It doesn't make sense, really, but that's okay."

Shikamaru blinked before shaking his head and deciding he really didn't want a better explanation. With that in mind, he continued to follow Naruto up the stairs, doing his best not to ogle the, er... blonds hind quarters as it danced up the stairs.

Naruto was taken; he had to remind himself several times. Not only was Naruto taken, but he had been taken by the most feared person enrolled at Konoha High, and quite possibly the most feared character in the entire fic. That didn't really bode well for Shikamaru, so his gaze alternated between the floor and fleeting glimpses at Naruto to make sure he hadn't yet gotten lost in the seemingly never-ending stairwell.

They reached Gaara's room after five flights of stairs.

Naruto knocked on the dark wood of the door a few times, calling out a cheerful greeting. The door creaked open slowly to allow the two boys admittance.

Shikamaru gulped, suddenly feeling like he was walking into his own demise.

--

Sasuke and Neji were - for lack of a better word - experimenting. They'd try a little of this, and a little of that. A little more of that, mixed with a little bit of this. Their hair clung to their foreheads, moist with sweat - and the entire kitchen was heated like a sauna.

"Sasuke," Neji panted, lifting his long hair off of his neck and fanning himself lightly. "That is the last time I ever try to bake cookies with you."

Sasuke scowled down at the latest blackened experiments that lay on the kitchen counter. He was sure that that batch would have come out right if the two of them hadn't gotten... distracted.

"We really shouldn't play Frogger while baking," he decided.

Neji rolled his eyes and pulled off his shirt, yet another ill conceived attempt to cool himself off.

"Damnit!" He finally whined. "Turn off the stove! It's hot in here!"

Sasuke grumbled and moved to turn off the stove, but in the process he slipped on a bit of egg on the floor and crashed into Neji.

They landed on the floor with identical "oomph's!" and were thus staring into each others eyes.

Neji immediately began nursing a nose-bleed.

Sasuke took advantage of the moment with his and Neji's first official "Sasuke/Neji moment". That is to say, well, he kissed him.

Five minutes later, Kakashi walked into the kitchen and immediately began screaming like a fan girl. "OMG!" He screamed. "My kitchen is on fire!!!"

--

Gaara turned away from his Troll Figurine collection the moment he heard his bedroom door creak open.

"Temari," he started to say, a threat laced in his voice. His sister really should know better than to disturb him in his own room. But, Gaara's words died in his throat the moment he saw who was really at his door.

"Naruto..." he whispered, his usually expressionless eyes welling up with tears of happiness that his one true love would visit him in his time of need. Need meaning, he's sick with the flu, not perverted like Neji.

"GAARA!" Naruto cheered before promptly flinging himself at the red head. "I brought you a present!"

Just then, Shikamaru walked into the room, causing one of Gaara's missing eyebrows to rise. "You want to have a threesome?" He asked skeptically.

Chirp. Chirrrrp.

Naruto blinked at him. "Huh?"

Gaara decided to remain silent.

Shikamaru blinked as he took in Gaara's bedroom. It was pretty much what he had imagined it to be, besides the rather out of place looking Troll collection. Meaning, each troll had a cut-out of Naruto's face pasted over its original face. Anyway, the room itself was done in shades of black. The walls were midnight black; the bed was ink black, and so on.

"Your present!" Naruto proclaimed proudly, holding out a gift wrapped in bright yellow paper.

Gaara took it eagerly, ripping off the paper like the excited little sick boy he currently was.

"A... bright pink fluffy scarf?" He asked, holding up the strip of fluffy thing formerly concealed in the paper.

"A hand knitted bright pink fluffy scarf!" Naruto corrected, taking the scarf and carefully wrapping it around Gaara's neck. "With a raccoon iron-on on each end."

He looked so proud of himself that Gaara really didn't have the heart to reject the gift. He decided it could also be used later on as a weapon, should he ever have the need to strangle his brother - or anybody.

"..." Gaara said instead.

"Your welcome," Naruto beamed before throwing himself at the red head for a hug. Iruka-sensei had instructed him not to kiss Gaara least he get sick again, so Naruto stuck with the hug.

Shikamaru shuffled his feet uncomfortably. This was clearly a sappy shonen-ai moment that he wasn't a part of.

Wolves howled in the background, and Shikamaru suddenly decided that he would like to hear the whole story behind them. So, the resident bisexual character left Gaara's room to find Temari - and hopefully hook up with her.

Gaara and Naruto didn't noticed, being too caught up in their second official: "Gaara/Naruto moment".

Chirp. Chirrrrp.

AN: This fic is slowly drawing towards its end, how sad is that? (I think it will round out at maybe 18 chapters.) Anyway, next time will probably include Ino's secret, and a bit more of Neji and Sasuke, because I love them to pieces.