What Kind of Person I Am?

What a jerk she had met. He knew that she was hesitant to reveal her family background, and he was using it.

He sat on his bike, smirking, and threw her the helmet. "Get on."

Ji Ah caught it, and glanced around, but Kim Tan was nowhere to be seen.

Young Do sighed dramatically. "Alright. Then what about if I tell you something interesting about Kim Tan?"

"Why would I want to know anything about Kim Tan?"

"Then do you want to know about me?"

"What?"

Young Do smiled and said, "You owe me something, do you remember?"

Ji Ah eyed him dubiously. She did not remembered taking any sort of help from him.

"You said you would have black bean noodles with me."

"You live in your head. I never said anything like that," she lied. She had only said that get rid of him.

"Besides," Young Do continued. "Kang Ye Seol and her friends are very curious about you. Particularly about your family and status. What an uproar it will cause at the school, can you imagine?"

In that moment, Young Do resembled the gossip girls precisely. Ji Ah closed her eyes, took a slow deep breath. Okay, it was better to talk. Let's not anger him. I will only ask him what exactly does he want. For the last time. She had not forgotten what he had done to Joon Young. He was capable of making her life more miserable.

She put on the helmet and made to climb the bike. Young Do immediately turned the key and roared it as if he had been totally expecting her to comply. It irked Ji Ah and she wanted to back off. The bike itself was bothering her too. She never been on a thing like that. It looked dangerous enough.

But maybe it would not be the same as a car.

"What are you waiting for?" Young Do was staring at her.

She eventually climbed on awkwardly. It didn't feel like herself. She again had a sense of being a square puzzle piece and getting thrust into a triangle.

"Drive slowly," she said quietly.

She didn't hold him, nor he told her to do so, as they sped off. She held the handle behind her.

He was driving too fast. They had barely crossed to another street when her hands began slipping off due to sweat. A bead of sweat rolled down the side of her face under the helmet. She closed her eyes and sat stiffly. She was breathing but it didn't feel like it. Her chest was constricting. She was going to slip off any moment now. Bike accidents were worse. If something collided into them right now or even grazed them, they might go spinning on the ground and nothing would remain of them – like in dramas. Or maybe only she was going to end up a mess, like every time.

It was hard – they were going at a high speed, and Young Do was not someone she wanted to hold tightly, but the latter didn't matter in this situation.

She leaned forward, abandoning the handle behind her, and quickly wrapped her arms around Young Do's waist. If he wouldn't stop the bike in a few seconds, she was going to scream.

Leaning against Young Do calmed her a bit. She could breathe better. At least she was not in the danger of falling off. He was probably going to tease her later.

The bike stopped, mercifully. Ji Ah immediately got off, but her jelly like legs were unreliable. She stumbled and fell right there.

"Ya!" Young Do hurried to get off the bike too as she began fumbling with the helmet. The strap seemed to have grown tighter. She heard a snap as Young Do put the bike on stand. He was crouching on the ground in a second and helping her take off the helmet. Her hands dropped as his gently unlocked the strap and pulled the helmet off. Cool air greeted her sweaty face and she gulped in air.

"What's wrong?" Young Do asked, moving strands out of her face.

She turned away and rasped. "Nothing. Just the first time on a bike."

She struggled to push herself to her feet. Young Do held her. She had to lean on him. Her legs were wobbly and the world was spinning a little.

"Alright," he said, unsure, and motioned toward the restaurant in front of them. "Let's go in."

She could feel him watching her closely, as she slowly walked beside him. She was relieved when they settled down on a table.

Young Do ordered noodles, while Ji Ah absentmindedly placed her shaking hands on the table. She tried to distract herself from this weird fearful feeling insider her by looking around the place. Distractions were her survival.

It wasn't a lavish place, unlike what she had expected of him. Just an ordinary kind of restaurant that Ji Ah would have visited when she could taste and eat at the same time. There were more high schoolers there, but not from their school. It was a relief.

Young Do was half regretting forcing her to come.

All color had drained from her face after she had gotten off the bike. She was trembling noticeably, looking everywhere except him. Her hands were toying with each other on the table and their shaking was worse.

Darn it! What was wrong? This was not a normal reaction. Had he been driving too fast?

He thought about reaching over and taking her hands into his. He couldn't bring himself to do it.

Ji Ah looked at him, then looked away again. He knew he was staring. He was not going to stop. That he could do.

Their order came. Young Do picked up the chopsticks, but Ji Ah didn't.

"Why are we here?" She stared –no, glared at him. It was always a glare.

"To eat," he said.

"Stop it, Choi Young Do."

"Stop what?"

"You know what," she said, almost cautious. "Playing with me. Isn't that what you are doing?"

Of course, that's what she thought, of course that's what it looked like. He might not know anything else, but he knew was not playing with her. Playing did not feel this way.

"What if I am not playing?" He said.

There was a flicker of anxiety on her face as she contemplated. But it seemed she was trying to brush it aside. "Then what are you doing? I know Kim Tan and you have problems. But why are you dragging me into this?"

She was not contemplating. She didn't believe him.

Young Do placed the chopsticks down. He had nothing witty to say. What revenge? He didn't really know what he was doing either. He was just thinking about her, then he drove to her workplace and waited to see her. The rest just happened. He couldn't bring himself to say that he missed her. Even though he must have done. Why else was he here?

"We all have family problems. Don't you have anything you want to keep to yourself? That you don't want to announce to the world. "She continued coldly, and avoided his gaze, "You don't have the right to use anything about my family to blackmail me in any way."

Young Do tried to fake a smile, but it would not come easily. "Okay," he said, "Let's eat this time together. I would stop blackmailing you after that."

"This is also blackmailing," she said.

Darn it!

He tried a prince-charming smile. "I am not blackmailing. Remember you owed me this."

She gave him a dirty look, but picked up the chopsticks. "Then after today, I don't owe you anything."

"Of course," he said.

Even though she looked like she preferred to be anywhere but here right now, at least he had her with him for now.

They ate in silence. He wanted to say something, but he couldnt think of anything that would not make her get up and leave. He glanced at her every so often, seeing wipe her mouth again and again, even when there was no sauce on it. She fiddled with her hair too, tucking them behind ears, for the hundredth time. Her cellphone rang once and she looked at the screen nervously, then she turned it off.

He decided not to comment. He had often seen her looking uneasy, out of place with people at school. She kept herself cut off from everyone. He knew he was not the only reason for that. He couldn't be. There was more to her. Or was he making himself feel better?

She never looked entirely comfortable with Kim Tan either, he reminded himself. But they had some different sort of history. Both good and bad sort.

He got a bitter taste in his mouth. Something growled inside him whenever he saw her with Kim Tan. Or whenever he saw the way Kim Tan looked at her.

Good or bad, it would be better if history remained history.

As they left the restaurant, Ji Ah hurried to leave. Young Do grabbed her wrist gently. "Where are you going?"

"I am not sitting on that thing again." She pointed a finger at his precious bike insultingly.

"That thing?" He repeated to himself. "Its OK when you break mine, but don't break my bike's heart."

She murmured something in response he couldn't hear. Probably more insults now aimed both at him and his bike.

"Let me walk you home like a gentleman then," he said. He didn't believe she would let him, of course. He was not even a gentleman.

"Thank you very much, but there is no need," she said sarcastically and pulled away.

"It is customary for a guy to walk his girl home after their date."

Ji Ah turned to him fully. "What? What date? And who is your girl?"

"You, who else."

She took a step back. He saw her become lost for a moment as she blinked at him nervously. That only amused him.

"I am no one's girl,'' she said, "You live in your own world."

He leaned towards her, smiling without knowing. "Why don't you cross over to mine then? Let's live together?"

Ji Ah didn't say it out aloud but he could see her calling him crazy, lunatic in her head. He had not intended to before, but now he didn't mind thinking of it as a date.

"I am going," She said.

Other than her nervousness, she looked all good now. She was not shaking or stumbling anymore as she walked. That was good. Also now he could do whatever he wanted.

"What's wrong with being my girl?" He called after her.

Ji Ah stumbled now. She turned and her face was obscured by a reflection from a streetlight.

"I have just decided. There will be more dates in future. But I will not blackmail you again. If you don't come I will just drag you with me, although it will be good if you came on your own," he said, moving towards her. "Look forward to it."

As he moved, her face came into view. For some seconds, it was like a façade had accidently dropped and her fears were falling out in the open. She stared at him, eyes wide with fear. Something inside him melted so fast it shook him.

Young Do reached for her before he could stop himself. But before his hand could even touch her cheek, she recoiled.

It hurt. It hurt more than it should have.

With shaky movements, she tightened her coat around herself, and walked away from him without a word.

He watched her go. She was always trying to hide as if afraid. He didn't exactly make her feel safe either, did he?

A strong feeling possessed him then. That same thing stirred inside him that she had stirred on the night when she had laid her head on his chest and told him that he wasn't that bad of a guy. The feeling was so overpowering that it was almost painful.

He wanted to hold her to himself. Could he?

Despite what she had said in drunken stupor, she would never come to him willingly.

Young Do tossed and turned in his bed at the hotel, not a hint of sleep behind his eyes.

He stared at his hands, regretting not holding Ji Ah's hands today. He knew exactly what was wrong with him. He wished Eomma was here to guide him. If she had been, he wouldn't be the 'bad guy' he was now.

That bloody Kim Tan. To take revenge, he didn't mind doing anything. After all he didn't have many rules. But Ji Ah was not it... It had not been a revenge since the beginning, he knew it, but why was he so reluctant to admit it? It was true that she had bothered him even when he had first met her. It was not always about Kim Tan.

He got up and left the bed to fetch water. His throat had grown too dry.

Ji Ah dreaded seeing Kim Tan, as she sat in the cafeteria, chewing lazily. They had no classes together since morning, so she had not seen much of him, but he was going to confront her about yesterday.

She terribly regretted going with Young Do. If she told Kim Tan that she had been with Young Do when she should have been with him, then hell would open. She felt as though she were a cheating girlfriend.

Going with Young Do had been a mistake. She didn't want to be involved with him in any way. Last night he had even made it clear that he was only trouble for her. Whatever was going on in his mind, she would rather not ask him about it again. She must not forget what kind of person he was.

Young Do pulled out the chair near her and sat down, placing his plate in front of him. Ji Ah couldn't hide her unhappiness fast enough. He was the last person she needed to see right now.

He ignored her unwelcoming expressions. "You looked so bored that I took pity on you."

"You don't need to. I am perfectly enjoying my own company." She replied. She considered getting up and leave but that could provoke him.

"Let me enjoy it too.'' He smirked.

Ji Ah almost jerked her chair away from him.

He began eating, totally unfazed. She hoped he would do it in silence. Would he really get mad if she got up and left?

"What happened to you yesterday?" He asked.

She regarded him mistrustfully, looking for any signs of derision. There were none. He seemed quite serious.

"What you mean?" She asked, nibbling on a dumpling.

"People don't usually look that pale or shake that badly upon their first ride on a bike," He said and went to place his hand on the table, but accidentally bumped it into the tea mug on the side.

Ji Ah acted on impulse. She lifted his hand up, out of the way of the spilling tea and leaned to the other side of her chair. The steaming hot tea spread faster than ink and dribbled down the table. Ji Ah grabbed tissue papers and began dabbing at it.

After cleaning a little, she realized she was still holding Young Do's hand and that was when she looked at him. The smugness had worn off. He looked serious, or was he annoyed? Ji Ah couldn't tell. She let go of his hand.

Why did she feel like she had done something wrong again? She always felt like this.

"What are you doing?" Kim Tan hovered over them.

Young Do looked away in irritation. "Why do you always appear when she is with me? I wanted to look at her a bit more."

It irked Kim Tan, just as Young Do had intended. Ji Ah fidgeted in her seat.

"We are eating together. See?" He said, faking a broad smile and waving at the food. "You can get lost now."

Kim Tan's glare only lacked shooting rays.

"Come. We need to talk," he said.

Young Do sensed Ji Ah tense up. Was she worried that they were going to break out in a fight, or was something else bothering her?

Young Do pursed his lips. He didn't want to talk. Still, it was a chance to mess with him. And to let him know. He stood up.

"You are no fun," he said, pouting, "Alright, let's talk."

Kim Tan glanced at Ji Ah once, only a flicker, then he turned and walked out of the Cafeteria. Young Do winked at Ji Ah before leaving as well. She flinched, giving him a weird face.

It must have been very seductive, he amused himself, smiling on his way out.

I LOVE YOU ALL. I mean it.

And I am sorry for disappearing. I became the kind of fanfic writer I hated the most :D

Again I love you all. Reading your reviews/comments and even the simple 'please update' made me happy. I keep rereading them to have enough motivation and continue this.

I am not out of ideas. Just motivation.

THANKKKK YOUUU ALLL!

I will try to devote more time to this fanfic.

TheDukeNight, thank you. I am also thinking about staying more original. Following the heirs' storyline actually helps me stay on track though. But I have recently watched many refreshing dramas and I am also thinking about dropping cliches and using ideas that are more original. (Though this brain keeps giving me stuff like 'You are first girl to treat me like this.' :D)

kcheema878, Thank you! I was adding these lines to separate scenes before too, but they were not appearing. I didnt realise it because I only skimmed through the chapter once was uploaded. I am sorry for the inconveniences.

thank you again, I never intended to write from Young Do's point of view when I started this. It happened on its own.

Ah and someone called me Unnie! Naru thank you!Choi Young Do is indeed the best.