Hae Na Ri, Not Cha Ji Ah

"Dont bring her into this." Kim tan said, as they stood near a window in an empty classroom.

Young Do leaned against the window frame, scratching his jaw. "Into what?"

"Into whatever game you are playing. Come find me whenever you feel like creating trouble. But I will not tolerate you hovering around her anymore."

He made it sound like Young Do was a pestering insect. It was weirdly insulting.

"You would have to," Young Do said, and clapped. "Okay, let's make a deal. You stay away from Cha Ji Ah, and I would protect her. What do you say?"

Kim Tan advanced towards him, stopping just into the punching range. Hands balled inside the trouser pockets. "You are the one she needs protecting from. If you touch her-"

"I have already done it. We even had dinner together. She had promised me black bean noodles you know. I walked her home afterwards. It was such a romantic night." He tried to look dreamy, but it was an alternate reality.

He knew he had fired the right shot the way Kim Tan's mouth opened and closed, then his face went stony. Time to put on guards for our Tan-ah. To hide. That was his thing. Acting like nothing could hurt him.

The bell rang at that moment and the class began to fill. Young Do sighed, stretching and smiling at Kim Tan. He exited the class.

It had been a good day.

"What happened?" Ji Ah asked, troubled, as Kim Tan dragged her into an empty corridor.

"Was it Choi Young Do? Were you with him last night?"

Ji Ah's heart sank. That useless jerk had told Kim Tan.

"Why? And Young Do?" Kim Tan's voice resonated startingly high in the empty corridor. "Didn't I tell you to stay away from him? Then who told you to go on dates with him?"

Ji Ah's cheeks burned. Did she have to follow whatever he told her? She should have maintained her distance from Kim Tan.

"I can decide for myself," Ji Ah said, hot inside. "No one has to tell me anything. It's my life."

"You can do whatever you want with your life but not with this face!" The words were harsh enough to slap Ji Ah in the face.

She stood struck.

He didn't seem regretful. Not even slightly. He simply walked away, his footsteps echoing in the corridor.

But Ji Ah stayed rooted to her spot. A burning rage was setting her insides to fire. Was she going to live with this forever? Was she supposed to live however others wanted her? Decide everything for her? How was it any different from the hell she was rotting in with her father?

She was not a slave. So why she had to live like one everytime, everywhere?

With trembling hands she stalked to a restroom and splashed cold water on her face several times. It didn't calm her nerves. She was still furious and shaking, her wet hair stuck to her face. Splotches of water on her sleeves and shirt. A sight to behold in the mirror.

She should not have let him leave like that. Should have said something. Anything. Told him that she was Hae Na Ri. That she was supposed to be her own person now.

Not a slave to others.

Music bounced off the room as Ji Ah's hands jammed the piano keys. Stiff and hurting, the muscles begging her to stop. But why would she? It was the best way to vent off the anger inside her.

Mr. Seo however noticed it. "The piano keys would not break -if that's what you are trying to do- but your wrists might," he commented. "Not worth it since it's completely out of tune anyway."

Sometimes Ji Ah wished he would just maintain silence

She stopped abruptly. She did feel like breaking something. But everything around here looked expensive. Nor she owned any of it.

"Did something happen at the school?" Mr. Seo questioned, coming to stand with the piano.

"Nothing happened," she said. But Mr. Seo still stared at her with that expressionless face. Probably waiting for her to reveal it herself. So she stood up and changed the topic. "What happened with the Park Soo Mi and your mother matter? Did they meet?"

The way he stared at her a few seconds longer meant he saw through her. For a moment she was afraid he was going to scold her.

Yet he strolled away, out of the room and she followed him into the corridor.

"Let's have lunch first," he said.

Over the lunch, Mr. Seo told her about his mother, Seo Dae Hee and Park Soo Mi's surprisingly cheerful and violence-free meeting. He was confused about it but Ji Ah knew the reason behind it; Seo Dae Hee was likely stuck with the same sharp clawing feeling called guilt that Ji Ah was familiar with. It was worst in the world.

It all seemed to have been resolved, and Mr. Seo had returned to his former self. Expressionless, almost cold, and a man of few but sarcastic words. It must have been hard on him.

Hard enough to seek help from Ji Ah.

After lunch, Ji Ah picked her bag and heard her cellphone vibrate in it.

"I have sent you the address and pincode for the new place," Mr. Seo said as they stood in the living room. "Go check the apartment with Secretary Ahn, then he will send someone to move your things."

A new place? Ji Ah didn't need one. Especially not the one Mr. Seo had bought for her. Probably some luxurious apartment. Mr. Seo was going too far.

"Ahjussi, I am okay where I live," she said. "It's close to school too."

"It's also close. Just move. I will take care of the rent. You are Cha Ji Ah. You can't live in that dingy apartment forever." He turned away from her dismissively, settling on a couch.

Something twisted inside her as she remembered the similar words she had heard earlier today, "You can do whatever you want with your life but not with this face!"

Mr. Seo had said something similar. He had reminded her of her place.

She was a replacement of some sort. Both to Kim Tan and Mr. Seo. She had known it, but some things had been blurry around her. Or maybe the loneliness she had as 'Hae Na Ri' had accompanied her all the way here to 'Cha Ji Ah.'

Although it stung to see, her vision was clear now.

What had she been doing? Getting close to the real Cha Ji Ah's Uncle, to her ex-boyfriend? Going to a rich school in her place, taking piano lessons? She had been trying to become someone else too. At this rate, she might lose herself.

Or maybe she had already begun to.

It had felt odd. That he had been conversing so easily, discussing such personal details of his life with her. Completely at contrast with his first impression. Getting her into a prestigious school, giving her pocket money, teaching her piano, having meals together randomly, and now a new place. Gosh, she was so stupid. Going along with everything mutely. She had not had much choice but to listen to Mr. Seo.

But this was going too far now.

Either he had also been seeing her as the real 'Cha Ji Ah'. Or he wanted her to become 'Cha Ji Ah'.

And like Kim Tan and her father, he was also trying to take control of her life.

"Ahjussi," she said, coldly. "I am supposed to be Cha Ji Ah, but I am not. I am Hae Na Ri. Regardless of my current name and face. I can't slip into someone else's life like this. I cant become someone else. Isn't it disrespectful enough to Cha Ji Ah that I am living with her identity?" And her heart, she thought bitterly. "But we should draw the line here, don't you think? I think so." She picked her bag. "I should get going now."

She was not expecting Mr. Seo to react. And he didn't. Hands in pockets, he sat still as a statue, staring stern and aloof, as she started towards the door. Like she had not said anything at all. For some reason, that made her even more mad.

In the doorway, she turned. "And Ahjussi? I have decided to stop learning piano. It's not my thing."

Then she stormed out, passing Secretary Ahn on her way.

"Did I do something wrong again?" Mr. Seo tilted his head, clueless. "What's wrong with all the women in my life?"

"I told you I already foresaw it." Secretary Ahn said, pushing back his loose spectacles like an annoyingly proud nerd who had aced exams without anyone's help.

"Shut it," Mr. Seo said. "It's all because of you. Now get her to move somehow."

"Sajangnim, I can't just abduct her. In my opinion, you should let her stay there. Don't give her wrong ideas. You are too generous to her. You even give her private piano lessons -uh although she has 'kicked' them aside now, I happened to hear. What you are trying to do isn't-"

It took a really dark glare from Mr. Seo to shut him up, but he knew what Secretary Ahn had wanted to say.

"I know what I am doing," he said. In truth, he didn't know either if he were doing the right thing or not.

He only knew that he couldn't just do nothing.

Young Do sat on a table outside the same convenience store where he had run into Ji Ah. He was hoping for the same to happen again, while he was texting and calling her, but there was no response. As usual. He knew she deliberately did it.

Sometime after his meeting with Kim Tan, he had heard Kang Ye Seol say that someone had seen Ji Ah cry in the restroom today. It was definitely not Young Do's doing. Then was it Kim Tan? Or something else happened? Was she okay now? He had to know. Even her voice would be enough, if he could hear it.

If only she would pick his call.

"Damn it," he cursed out aloud, throwing his cellphone on the table in frustration.

Then he picked it again. Typed another message. "What are you doing? Answer me." Hit sent. Then threw it back in the same manner.

Would it hurt her to return a short message? Any response would be good. Because it would be a response at least.

Okay, he liked her. He liked her more than he thought he did. Perhaps 'like' was an understatement. What he felt for her was far more passionate than that. And the more he was seeing her, the stronger his feelings were growing. He would not be able to contain them anymore. It had started to hurt. He wanted her to smile at him, not ftown or scowl all the time. To look at him, give him attention, become as curious about him as he was about her. He imagined holding her small form protectively against himself again, feeling the warmth of her body on his, caressing her cheeks, her hair. And her lips...

He let out a long sigh. Stop here Choi Young Do.

Would it be right to call it first love?

There would be no denial now. Nor backing away. If he liked her, he was going to have her. Revenge? Bullshit! He couldn't care less about Kim Tan or anything else. All he wanted was Ji Ah. Ji Ah to look at him. Ji Ah to go out with him. Ji Ah to simply talk to him. To freaking respond to his texts.

He checked his cellphone again. No response. He rubbed his eyes, groaning.

It was crazy. Ji Ah totally despised him.

But he liked her too much to simply give up on her. He didn't have much of anything in his life now. So how could he let Ji Ah go? Be it Kim Tan or someone else, he would kick them out of the picture. Ji Ah was his. He would do whatever he could to keep her by his side. He was an asshole anyway, so doing a few more 'bad' things would not hurt, would it?

Moon Sik fidgeted with the bundles of packages he held, as he walked through Cheongdamdong, one of the most affluent areas of Seoul. The houses on his both sides loomed tall, almost mockingly over him.

He reached the house and rang the bell. While he was waiting, a noticed a door open near the end of the street and a high school girl walk out. He was about to look away but had to do a double take.

Cha Ji Ah.

The poor-rich girl.

She had confused and intrigued him greatly. She went to a rich high school and her food was too expensive. For an orphan she was living quite lavishly. In a trashy apartment. Weird, right?

But why was she here?

She had already disappeared down the street. He heard a shuffling of feet come from the house in front of him, followed by a click. The Ahjumani in front of him appeared to be a maid, a clean white apron tightened around her waist.

She eyed him oddly. Probably because of his age. He always had a hard time finding work because of that. And his lack of voice too.

He handed her the packages, gave her the register to sign, and then turned away. He was done for the day.

As he neared the house which Ji Ah had exited, he looked up and caught sight of a middle-aged man standing on the balcony, a coffee mug in hand. Tall, pale and handsome. He was casually dressed. Yet he had his nose in air and an emotionless face. An arrogant and important looking man. And filthy rich too.

Moon Sik stared at him. Ji Ah had walked out from here.

Were they... in some kind of... weird relationship?

That would explain why she went to a rich school without scholarship. He was not sure how that made him feel. Disappointed maybe, and uneasy. He liked her. She had been nice to him.

And now he was angry.

That despicable man on the balcony caught sight of him. But Moon Shik didn't look away. He was not scared of anyone. He gave him scary eyes, and would have signed, "You bastard!" But he didn't want to give away his weakness. Or the fact that he knew.

The man's brows twitched for a second, and he tilted his head, eyes following Moon Shik. Was he scared? Moon Shik threw out his chest and marched out of the street. That Unnie was also an orphan like him. So this man must be taking advantage of her. She did look the stupid kind.

He still liked her though. So he had to do something about it.

Ji Ah slammed down the tray, nearly knocking the cups off it. The two customers on the table as well as her timid manager behind the counter jumped in their seats. As for the other parttimer, his cups went rolling on the floor.

"Ya, Cha Ji Ah!" He hissed upon coming closer. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

She gave him a glare and went about her work. Slamming, knocking, banging things. Surely they could bear with her today. She had been bearing everyone for 18 years now.

Her cellphone pinged again. Had been doing so for sometime now. It was either Kim Tan or Young Do. But she had refused to check. Though she had a guess about who was it.

Now she pulled out her phone -and yes Choi Young Do.

"Where are you?"

"What are you doing?"

"Cha Ji Ah."

"Ji Ah-ya."

"Don't ignore my heart."

"I will go to your workplace if you don't reply. You are working at that Olive Chicken place right?"

She smiled. His stalking skills had degenerated; She had left that place a week ago. No need to worry about seeing his annoying flirtatious smile.

Ji Ah was wiping tables. Other staff had gone home but she had to stay to lock up. It was a small place so there was not much to clean anyway. The last few customers were also leaving.

Except for one.

He was around her age. He had been sitting here, drinking a single latte for an hour. Now he was approaching her, the latte in his hand.

"This is for you," he held out the latte cup shyly.

Why was he handing it to her? She thought impatiently. He should throw it in the dustbin. She was about to tell him that, but let it go and took the cup from his hand. He smiled at her. A little too shyly. And left. That smile made her look at the cup. There was a number written there.

That was why he had not thrown it in the bin. She was too stupid.

She smiled slightly. What should she do? He was cute. Normally she would have ignored cute guys too. Dating was not the best idea in her situation. She wouldn't be able to reveal anything about her family, her background, nothing at all. It would be a mess.

But maybe she could make an exception this time.

One, because it would put Kim Tan at a distance. He ought to accept that she was not the real Cha Ji Ah. Two, because... well... she had never dated before. It would be a nice distraction from everything. Only temporary.

Her thoughts were still scattered when someone snatched the cup out of her hand.

"Woah, you are having the time of your life. I was worried needlessly." Young Do glanced at the number scrawled on the cup, then looked around. "Where's this loser?"

The last two customers walked out. Perfect timing. They were alone now. This happened every single time when she was with Young Do. But today she was not afraid.

Because she was furious.

"Give it back," she seethed. She was not going to be bullied anymore. By anyone.

"Why are you getting angry? Don't tell me you were going to call this loser?" He looked taken aback. "You didn't even answer my texts. Was he hotter than me?" He pretened to think. "Well I doubt he would look still hot with a black eye."

Ji Ah closed her eyes for a few seconds. Inhaled deeply. She had murdered someone once and it had wrecked her life. She couldn't do it again.

"Stop joking around," She said, calmer now. "Return the cup."

"Wanna see how good my aim is?" Young Do asked playfully, raising the cup.

At first Ji Ah had this crazy thought that he was going to hit her with the cup, but then she followed his gaze. Over to the dustbin.

"Ya!" She shouted, but he had already flung the cup. It landed straight into the bin. The way he had broken her hair clip.

"Pretty good." He applauded himself.

"Ya Choi Young Do, this is enough! Who said you could throw it away?" She shouted, surprising him. "Stop touching my things. Do I look that easy to bully? Is that what you meant when you called me vulnerable?" She threw away the wiping cloth she had been holding. Young Do's expressions had changed too. He looked dead serious now. No hint of playfulness. "I don't care whatever you want. Just stay away from me. My life is my own. Whether I call some guy or not, it's none of your business."

"It's my business because I don't want you to see some other guy!" Young Do said, almost shouting. "Look at me damn it, I am here! If there is a man you want to call, then it should be me. If there is a man you want to text, it should be me. If there is anything you want to do with a man, then it should be me."

"What?" Ji Ah stilled, dumbstruck. What nonsense was he spewing?

Today it was obvious that he was not playing around. It was anger on his face. No, not anger. It was jealousy. Similar to how he reacted to Kim Tan. He was serious and he meant what he said. And slowly pieces started to connect and the meaning begun to sink in.

Then she had a frightening realisation.

"Didn't I tell you that you are a woman to me?" Young Do said quietly now, stepping up and holding her elbow. "Then I should be a man to you too."

She pulled away her elbow at once. "Get-get out if-if you are going to speak nonsense." Her heart was trembling. Gosh, what was this now? She was so dense. Why had not she taken Young Do seriously?

She moved back again when Young Do stepped even closer, scratching the corner of his eye. "Why do you think no other guy approaches you at school?" He paused. "Because they know not to. They know you are mine."

"What?" She stared. "I-I am not anyone's. Don't be delusional." She said. "Now get out, I need to lock up."

She was tense, afraid that he would be persistant. But he stood silent for a few more nervous seconds before speaking.

"I am going," he said with a sort of resolution. "But I am not going to stay away. See you at school, Cha Ji Ah." Was that a threat or something?

He looked reluctant as he took some steps back. Then to her relief, he finally left.

But there was no time to relax. She wrenched off her apron and hurried to lock up the restaurent. It had gotten dark but there were still people on the streets.

She had always thought Young Do was just flirting, fooling around. Playing with her. To mess with Kim Tan, or because he was simply a bully. Bullies didn't have a reason to be mean. They were just scumbags in general. And she must have been an easy target. That was why she had always been afraid of him.

But it turned out that Kim Tan was not the only guy Young Do had a problem with. Blackmailing her into eating together, calling, messaging all the time, teasing her at school, getting riled up whenever she ignored him, and the way he often stared at her -darn it, darn it, darn it!

It was not only because of Kim Tan. How had she not seen it before? And she was advising Mr. Seo on his love life. It was almost funny. She really was dumb.

Now she had another reason to be afraid of Young Do. What exactly was going on in his head? It was not a nice thing to be liked by someone like Young Do. She [absolutely] did not want that. That could have been the reason he had been bullying her. It probably was. Was he a kid? Pulling the ponytail of a girl he liked?

Now that she thought about it, he was always meaner whenever Kim Tan came up. Because he was the only guy around Ji Ah. It had always been jealousy on his part.

And that hair clip. It was also a gift by Kim Tan. Young Do had known about it.

She groaned, tired and disoriented as she unlocked her house and trudged inside. Throwing away her bag, wrenching off her jacket, she collasped on the bed. The dinner would have to become breakfast. She had no appetite.

The idea of going to school tomorrow was enough to make her sleepless. Was it that hard to have a peaceful year? Out of all people, why did it have to be Choi Young Do?

He was a bully, a spoiled rich brat who didn't care about other's feelings, who was used to getting what he wanted. Look what he had done to poor Joon Young. And probably to many others she didn't know about. A rich brat like Young Do could never genuinly like anyone. Maybe this had something to do with Kim Tan. Or maybe not. She was tired of these two men.

And one more man.

Why did Mr. Seo got her admission here?

Things would have been much simpler if she were going somewhere like her previous school. Satan parties when all the rich brats gather up. She was mad at him again. Mr. Seo just wanted to turn her into the real Cha Ji Ah somehow. He didn't really care about her. She had been too blind and indifferent towards many things happening around her.

It was all her own fault, as always. So it was her responsibility to fix it.

Well... hello? Hope you all have been well. Here is a long chapter after my long long absence. Don't hate me too much. I got some story favourite notifications and felt bad. So here I am. Have a good day/night!

~Fawns