-RE-WRITTEN-

Rikku: Updating is really difficult now that I've landed myself a job, but I'm trying!

Okay, on with the chapter. Make sure to read all re-writes…

Winter of Love
Chapter 6: Approval

It seemed my only pastime lately was going through Anna's Itako books. Secretly, I didn't know what good they did me. Everything I read went either unacknowledged or to little use, as I hadn't even gone beyond studying at that point. I was beginning to question Anna's training. Sure, she was cut out for working a shaman to his limits, but she had yet to fully explain the concepts of being an Itako to me.

I groaned, tossing the book aside as I propped my back against the nearest wall. "Why did I ever agree to this?"

That was a rhetorical question. I picked up the irritating book again and glared at it, almost daring it to answer me. After all, I was alone and a little obscurity wouldn't hurt…

Well, not for long.

"Miho!"

That oh-so-familiar sing-song voice began to echo through the shrine. I groaned, fully aware of who it was and what havoc he'd bring. It was early in the morning and my slumbering mind was still upholding its limitations… for one thing, a voice as persistent as his at this time wasn't something it could easily bear with.

Finally, I heard the door to my room slide open, and without even bothering to look up from the dusty book in my hands, I spoke up. "Hey Horo."

"Horo?" The said boy repeated with a chuckle. "Nicknaming me already, ne?"

I giggled and shook my head, finally meeting his gaze. "It's a lot less troublesome without the other half."

He laughed again, picking up one of the old books from a nearby pile. "So what are you reading?"

I frowned. "Old Itako stuff from Anna's bookshelves."

Horo smirked, noting my frustration. "I don't know whether to laugh or pity you."

"Shut up."

"No need for that tone, missy." Horo jeered, raising a clever brow. "I just came by for some friendly chit-chat."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, really." The shaman nodded, taking a seat on the wooden floor. Quickly, he gestured for me to scoot closer to him. "I've decided to let Pirika and Ren be."

I did as Horo said, motioning over and glancing at him with a hint of doubt and questioning. "Lies."

"Err… truth." He responded. "Even though I'm not thrilled with the matter, I figured Pirika's happiness isn't something to risk for the sake of my ego."

"You mean that big ol' thing?"

"Shut up."

I laughed. "That's good, I'm glad you took my advice."

"Yep," Horo agreed, nodding once again. "And I also realized my sister would give Ren hell anyways… so it's a win-win situation for us!"

I looked over at the boy with understanding and grinned. "Just not for Ren."

"I pity the foo'."

"But I don't want to see this mess up." I stated, placing the book I had been holding with the other torn paperbacks. "Pirika and Ren… it's almost cute, ne?"

"Hardly." Horo scoffed. "Just as long as he doesn't hurt her or touch her in… wrong ways."

"Understandable."

"And I'll see to it that he doesn't."

I raised a curious brow. "How?"

"Call it… initiation."

I shifted in my seat, uneasy with the idea. "Horo, leave the poor boy alone."

"Why?"

I sighed. "Just don't do anything… unnecessary… he's probably already at his limits without you interrogating his every move."

"Nah, I just wanna ask him a thing or two."

"Like?"

"Like… if he's ever - "

"Forget I asked." I quickly interjected.

"And you call me a pervert…" Horo muttered with a disapproving shake of his head.

"That's because you are one." I retorted.

The shaman grinned. "Well, you know what they say… great minds think alike."

"So what do they say when there's one 'great mind' and one halfwit?"

"I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that and get on with my point," Horo mumbled. "I need your help with my plan, Miho."

I turned to look at the rather large pile of books and frowned. Another day of worn-out pages, scriptures, diagrams, and maps was enough to twist around that little bit of sanity I had left. "As long as it doesn't involve anymore studying…"

"Okay!" A small smile graced his face. "Well… an interrogation like the one I have planned can't consist of any… 'interruptions'… and in order to keep that from happening, Pirika can't exactly know what's going on…"

"Wait, you're not implying that I have to…"

"It's this or studying, babe."

"B-but… Pirika doesn't even like me!" I rebutted as my eyes widened in outrage. "And don't call me that!"

"Of course she likes you!" Horo reassured me with persistent eyes. "Pirika gets along with all my fangirls!"

"Plastic dolls and your grade school teachers don't count, sweetie."

"Ouch." He chuckled, shaking his head. "Come on Miho, just this one favour? You don't have to put up with her all the time; take her to the mall or something!"

"Horo…"

"Do it for me."

"But…" I glanced at his dashing black orbs. They were even more persistent now. "I… I guess I can…"

"Great!" Horo cheered, catching me off guard in a tight embrace. "I'll repay you somehow Miho, thank you!"

I sighed again as my body told me not to fight against his strong bind. "The things I do for someone like you…"

Really, what was I getting myself into?

xxxxx

That afternoon, an intrigued Tamao and I watched the unfolding scene taking place in the living room from our safe distance in the cozy kitchen.

I sat myself on the counter, playfully kicking my feet into the air as I watched Horo strain in determination in an attempt to make an appeal to a rather reluctant Ren. Tamao, on the other hand, sat her petit self on a chair with her legs up and huddled to her chest. Her shy smile was also amused as she, too, focused on the boys in the other room.

"Oh, come on!" Horo insisted once more.

Ren calmly sat in front of the small television with a nonchalant expression. "For the last time, no."

"Aww…" the snow shaman pouted as he continued to flail his arms around in desperation, "but don't you want to spend the day with just Yoh and I? We're going to the fair, it's just around the corner – and this is the only time of the year that it's open!"

"Why the hell would I want to go anywhere with you two?"

Ren's words were pushing Horo to his edge. Especially since he didn't even want to put up with Ren for an entire day… it was all just part of his 'plan'. "You bastard!"

Ren shot Horo a dark glare, but just as soon as he had opened his mouth to spat what was assumed to be another sharp comeback, a voice everyone knew (and feared) began to echo throughout the little shrine.

"Horohoro! Where are you?"

Accompanied by her continuous bickering, Pirika was supposedly just down the hall and heading straight for the living room. I knew it, Horo knew it, and damn, did Ren know it too.

The shaman's visage then became fearful as he glanced at Horo with pleading eyes.

"What's with the look?" The other boy inquired, raising a brow.

I gulped. Whatever happened between Ren and Pirika the other day in the kitchen must've been disastrous for an expression like that to ever come across Ren Tao's proud face.

"O-on second thought…" Ren stuttered, glancing back at the hall. "It-it's a nice day, might as well go out, right?"

Horo looked at Ren suspiciously, almost doubting the agreement.

"Horo!"

Pirika's shrill voice shook Ren out of character yet again and he jumped to rush Horo outside, sweating bullets as he shoved the older boy as far as possible, trailing closely behind.

I shook my head and laughed at such misfortune. Not only was Ren forced to slip out of his anti-social mood for a whole day to play on mini-rollercoasters with the two people in the world he couldn't bear being with… but Horo, too, was in just as much pain, having to cope with the one person he'd jump at the chance to strangle - all for the sake of his ignorant little sister… Yes, those two were in for a long day.

But a small and helpless whimper from the tiny pink-haired girl nearby had cut into my train of thought. I glanced at Tamao to see her eyeing Yoh as he trudged into the kitchen with a camcorder in his right hand.

"Hey Yoh," I smirked as he dug into the fridge.

He turned around with a water bottle in the other hand and smiled. "Oh hey, Miho!"

"Going out with Horo and Ren, huh?" I grinned.

"Unfortunately." Yoh answered. "What about you? Any plans for today?"

At that moment Pirika had also walked in, pondering and glancing towards every corner. I sighed as I continued to watch her. "Loads of plans, actually…"

"Have any of you seen my brother?" the blue-haired girl questioned with a pout.

Tamao had just opened her mouth to respond, but I shot her a look of warning just in time. Quickly, she shut her mouth and silenced herself.

"Nope," I replied, trying to clear the tension in the air. "Haven't seen him at all."

Pirika shrugged. With a frown she turned on her heel and left as every eye in the room traced her movements.

I frowned and turned to Yoh. "Maybe you should get going before Pirika gets suspicious."

"Oh yeah," Yoh responded, glancing at the camcorder in his grip. "I'll just be on my way out then… bye Miho, and good luck!"

I scoffed and waved the boy off, only to hear another whimper like the one from before. This time, however, Yoh had heard it as well. He glanced at Tamao's uneasy expression.

"Oh, I didn't see you there, Tamao!" He chuckled. "Are you going out today too?"

Tamao suddenly blushed a deep red. "Uh… n-no, I have to cook."

Suspicion grew from within me as I studied her reactions. My mind had already come up with a valid answer, but now I was all the more intrigued…

"Take a break sometime, ya know… the weather just got good!" Yoh smiled at the younger girl, but his eye had suddenly caught sight of the silver watch around his wrist. "Speaking of which, I really gotta go! Bye guys!"

"See ya!" I cried to his retreating back as he dashed out the door. I turned to Tamao to see her eyes still following Yoh's figure. "Um… Tamao?"

"Y-yes?"

I watched as her hopeful eyes drained towards the floor. The amusement in her face from before had suddenly disappeared and was replaced by a fallen expression. I frowned and shook my head. "Nevermind…"

I gave Tamao a small smile and hopped off the counter, reminding myself of the duty Horo had entrusted me with… getting Pirika out of the house. I groaned as my feet dragged me down the hall, stopping in front of Horo's room where I had just caught a sight of blue.

'Wait…' My mind began to click backwards to about five minutes ago. I had noticed it, but I didn't question it before. Now my mind was refusing to let the subject slide. Yoh… he had a camcorder, but for what purpose? Horo was going to interrogate Ren… surely they wouldn't get some sort of evidence on tape just to change Pirika's mind and break her heart?

That was just wrong. Horo wouldn't do something like that… would he? I specifically told him not to hurt his sister… but at what heights was he willing to go to in hopes of ensuring her happiness?

"Nah," I whispered to myself. "Horo knows better… he wouldn't."

With that said I threw the thoughts aside, intending to focus on my part of the plot. "Pirika?" I called, knocking on the door.

It was about a moment before Pirika's cute face peered out of the room. "Oh. Hi Miho."

"Hi," I smiled at the younger girl. "I was just wondering…"

"Hm?"

"Well… being the new girl in town and all, I haven't actually gotten a real tour of this… erm, place." I came up with the excuse all at once. "No one's available to take me out, I mean, with Tamao doing chores, Yoh and Horo always on the run, and Anna being… well, Anna… so, I was wondering… you wouldn't mind taking me around, would you?"

Pirika raised a curious brow, almost questioning my motives. "Okay…" she replied with a hint of reluctance.

My smiled widened. "Great! Thank you!"

Pirika nodded. "So where do you want to go? The fair?"

"N-no!" I stammered, recalling Horo's talk with Ren. "That's alright, I've been to loads of fairs before… I wanted to go somewhere new…" I searched my mind for an idea, but the only one that came to mind was actually Horo's suggestion. "… How about the mall?"

"Sure, the mall's always fun!" Surprisingly, the younger girl smiled. It was strange seeing her so sweet and cute, but I definitely liked this side of her better. "It'll be a nice change from always going with a lousy brother."

I chuckled. "I don't know much about siblings, but you're probably right… especially if it's Horo."

Pirika grinned. "You like him a lot, don't you?"

"Eh?" I felt my cheeks blaze on fire.

"You call him 'Horo'…" she analyzed. "Aside from myself, no one else calls him that… you two must be really close."

"We're just friends." I assured her, biting my lip. "Really, that's all we'll ever be…"

Pirika didn't say anything else. She studied my stern expression for a moment before she slowly nodded. "Alright… let's get to the mall then."

xxxxx

Truthfully, I had expected a day with Pirika to be somewhat… horrible. But it wasn't. I was having a great time, with all my studies finally being set aside… and Pirika turned out to be a very likeable person, despite all of her brother's stories, once I got to know her.

Pirika suddenly stood on tiptoe just as we were leaving a small DVD shop. "You don't suppose Horo's here, do ya?"

I sighed. "I don't think so, Pirika… he's probably gone somewhere else with his friends."

"Yeah…" Pirika mumbled. She looked rather reluctant to believe, still glimpsing around the mall, until she turned to me with pleading eyes. "So you wanna shop around some more?"

"Sure!" I grinned. "How about games now?"

"Games?" Pirika repeated. "What, no clothes? Nothing girly?"

"Nah," I shook my head. "I've been wearing clothes since birth. Games, on the other hand, would serve as a new experience."

It was Pirika's turn to sigh. "Whatever you say…" And without further ado, she led the way towards the nearest game store.

xxxxx

"How does this look?"

I tightly clutched onto the heavy bags from the game store as I turned around to see Pirika holding up a short blue skirt to her waist. We had finally gone shopping for clothes just as Pirika had requested while I was paying for a new system and additional games. "It matches you." I stated, referring to her hair.

"Thanks," she chirped, rushing to the one of the lines at the registers. "Why don't you try something on, Miho?"

"I did." I replied, showing her a pair of black denim jeans fashionably torn with holes. I followed her to the long line of women as she proceeded to squeal over my choice.

"I love that!" she commented, a wide smile spreading across her face. "And I can't believe you're such a small size!"

I chuckled. "I'm not sure whether or not that was a compliment."

She grinned and turned to admire her own skirt. "I wonder what Ren will think of this… Does he like cute girls?"

I could only raise a brow as a variety of questions ran through my mind. Was this more than mere infatuation? What possessed Pirika to abandon that frightening image just for a boy? How did Ren really feel about her? "Are you… in love with Ren?" I finally asked.

"Love is a strong word, Miho!" Pirika blushed.

"Are you?"

"I… I don't know…"

"Pirika," I frowned. "What if he doesn't feel the same?"

Her face fell as she gently squeezed the skirt in her hands. "You've seen it too… the way Ren acts around me… It's not the same way Horo responds whenever he's with you…"

I didn't know what to say. My throat clogged and I couldn't muster up a single word to comfort Pirika. She knew it all along… she knew Ren didn't return the feelings, but she was still bearing with it. I admired Pirika's determination, but that broken glint in her eye told me she was still struggling just to be that strong…

xxxxx

The two of us eventually left the mall, packed with shopping bags. Pirika didn't let the issue about Ren bother her anymore as we continued to chat about other unrelated things.

Calling it a day, we hopped onto the first bus in silence, both of us gripping at our bags with the little energy and strength we had left.

I stared out of one of the vehicle's large windows, watching the scenario outside. The bus rounded at one point, allowing me to catch a glimpse of the fair that had been setup not too far from the mall. I sighed, imagining how much fun Horo and the others were having. Truthfully, I had never once been to a fair in my life. Back at the shrine, I had lied to Pirika about it, just to drive her away from the topic.

"Miho?"

I turned in my seat to glance at a worried Pirika. "Yeah?"

"Is there something wrong?"

"Nah… I was just thinking about the fair."

"You know, we could have gone…"

"That's alright; I still had lots of fun at the mall with you." I made an attempt to smile, but Pirika wasn't buying it.

She frowned. "I bet you would've had more fun with Horo."

I blushed. "That's not the case, Pirika!"

"Tell me the truth."

Her tone was so stern I couldn't help but stare at her cold expression. I thought for a moment and turned away, looking back out the window. "You're probably right."

"I don't think you're 'just friends'… you have feelings for my brother, don't you?"

I shrugged. I didn't know what I felt towards Horo, whether or not it was just friendship… I couldn't reply because nothing was ever certain when it came to my relationships with people.

"Do you…" Pirika was venturing into another question… but rather hesitantly this time. "Do you want to be with him?"

I paused. "Even if I did want that… it's still not possible."

I looked over to see the younger girl quite surprised by my answer. Her eyes expanded with outrage. "W-why not? Horo has feelings for you; don't you know that?"

"Pirika -"

"Why can't you just accept him? Unlike Ren and I, you two actually share the same feelings! Isn't that enough for you?"

"Stop." I rebutted, drawing an uneasy breath. "I understand you're upset about Ren, but you can't just deal with your feelings like this."

"Like what?"

"Like through anger."

Heads were now turning towards the source of the loud voices. I could feel eyes on me, but I thought nothing of it. Pirika's icy glare was already sending chills down my spine.

"It's not fair, Miho!" She had completely ignored what I had said. "Why can't you just give Horo a chance? What's wrong with you?"

"It's not that simple!" I snapped, loud enough to silence her. "Pirika, I've made a lot of tough decisions in my life… I was abandoned and so, in return, I abandoned others. I've made mistakes that I can't take back.

"But the least I can do now is stand for myself. I don't want to be hurt anymore, and I don't want to hurt anyone else. If I… If I were to be with Horo, I'm afraid one or the other will happen. I don't know myself, Pirika, I've been damaged; tainted. I'm not strong enough to make sure that I won't screw up… and until I'm certain that I've found the one person that can repair what was left broken in me… I can't get close to people without having my doubts."

For a while, neither of us spoke another word. It wasn't until a few minutes later when Pirika looked at me with understanding eyes. "Then promise me one thing."

I turned my gaze back to the outdoors. "What's that?"

"When you've finally re-collected yourself… when there's no more doubts, and Horo does end up being the one for you… don't let him down."

I focused my sight on the continuous line of trees passing by, feeling the pits of my stomachs churn with uncertainty. I couldn't look her in the eye as I opened my mouth to finally answer: "I promise."

xxxxx

About an hour into our arrival back at the shrine, the three boys piled in as well, exhausted and complaining. I was in my room the entire time, but their loud voices were enough to inform me of their return.

I laid on the hard wooden floor, releasing my breath. Not a single thought raced through my mind as I peered at the ceiling tiles, playing connect-the-dots in the back of my mind with the numerous little holes up there.

I frowned, slowly noting the fading sounds in the shrine. Eventually, there was not another peep as an awkward silence oozed into every room.

I couldn't help but feel intrigued as I propped myself to a seat, straining my ears for at least another curse, the clatter of dishes, the occasional cries of agony or pain…

Nothing.

"What the…" I brought myself to my feet, motioning towards the door and out into the empty halls. Finally, I caught sight of a familiar brunette, planted right before the TV. "Yoh, where is everyone?"

He shrugged. All of his attention had been drained by whatever was on the television as he then broke into a fit of laughter.

"What are you watching…?" I questioned, almost afraid to ask.

"Miho! You should see this! It's hilarious!"

Reluctantly, I walked over and took a seat by the shaman, facing the screen to see… a giant eye?

…

"Yoh, not that close!"

"Oops."

"Honestly, don't you know how to use a camcorder?"

Horo's face then came into view as the camera pulled away from the close sight of his eye.

"See, the whole purpose of this video… is to prove how much cooler I, Horohoro, am in comparison to someone like… Ren Tao!"

The direction of the camera changed so that it was now focused on the said boy. Glaring daggers, Ren suddenly flicked a certain finger.

I turned to Yoh. "You mean this tape is all just for Horo's amusement? He's not trying to blackmail Ren and show this to Pirika?"

"Of course not." Yoh replied with a wide grin on his face. "Sure, he wanted to interrogate the life out of Ren, but that's not on tape… This is entirely for his satisfaction, and I just agreed to helping."

I laughed and shook my head, secretly pleased that Horo had taken my words into account. I knew it. I knew he wouldn't do something so cruel… Actually, he had just end up doing something stupid instead.

"What the hell was that for?"

Horo was now outrageously yelling at Ren as he trailed behind the boy. However, Ren didn't pay any attention to him. He was trying to avoid the other two boys… that much was evident.

For a while most of the film consisted of Yoh, with the camera, following Horo, who followed Ren's lead. At one point Ren had stumbled over a rock and Horo had turned around to snicker at the camera… But that was as much as they did for a total of ten minutes or so.

Finally, Yoh spoke up.

"What's the point of this? I thought we were supposed to have fun."

Horo turned around again and frowned at the other shaman.

"Well if this halfass bothered to do anything uncool to prove how awesome I am, you wouldn't be so bored!"

Ren stopped in his tracks. Turning around, he fed the camera his darkest, most overwhelming glare yet.

"Who did you just call a 'halfass'?"

"You! … Halfass!"

"Dickhead!"

"Ahahaha, that was clever… Asswipe!"

"How long does this argument last?" I inquired, watching the two boys on the screen continuously spat at each other.

"It'll get good soon." Yoh smirked.

…

Horo was a lot calmer now as he faced Ren with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Okay, how about we just finish this, man to man?"

"I don't see any other man."

Horo twitched, trying to ignore the comment. Suddenly, he sighed.

"Do you have feelings for my sister?"

"What kind of question is that?"

"If you don't, then why don't you just say that to her face?"

"Because…"

"Aha!"

Horo had turned back yet again to face the camera. He began to enthusiastically point a finger at Ren.

"He DOES have feelings after all! Look at that, little Ren being all sentimental – isn't that cute?"

"Horohoro, look out!"

Horo looked over his shoulder, heeding Yoh's warning, only to see a red-faced Ren jump what looked like three feet off the ground. He landed on Horo's back as the two then engaged into a mad fist fight.

"And this is what I missed…" I muttered, trying to resist from laughing as the two boys went all out. The camera violently shook as crowds began to circle around the shamans.

Yoh laughed. "That was pretty much our day at the fair."

The screen turned blank for a moment, until what looked like a blue spike appeared. The time on the lower right corner read about fifteen minutes after the previous brawl.

Once again, Yoh was having complications with the zooming, but eventually, the scene was intact. Horo was sitting on a curb, rubbing his bruised head. Ren was no where in sight.

"So much for cool, ne?"

"Shut up, Yoh."

"That's for being too egotistical."

"I know, I know…"

"What was the purpose of taping this anyways? Besides… you know, looking 'cool'?"

"Well… I wanted to impress Miho… but she probably won't end up watching this anyways; she's stubborn that way."

I felt my insides stir and my hands become sweaty. I could feel Yoh's eyes on me, making me all the more uncomfortable. But instead of turning around to face him, I kept my gaze on the television as I fought to control the embarrassment brewing inside of me.

Soft chuckling could be heard from the TV.

"Horohoro, just a shot in the dark… but do you have feelings for Miho?"

This time however, I chanced a look at Yoh to see him with wide eyes as he scrambled towards the VCR in an attempt to remove the tape. Quickly, I grabbed at his arm, tightly holding him back as I intended on watching the rest of it.

Horo didn't answer immediately. He turned his head, rubbing the back of his neck in silence. For a moment, he appeared hesitant; probably debating whether or not he should answer the question. The boy then let out a deep sigh, still looking away from the camera.

"I…"

The screen went blank again. My eyes expanded as I turned to Yoh, who was still held back by my grip, and then back at the VCR… only to find a hand retrieving the tape from the machine. I looked up to see an outraged Horo, out of the blue and blushing three different shades of red, clutching the tape in his hands before dashing out of the room without a single word or glance.

"Wha… what was he gonna…" the gears in my brain had begun clicking again as I released Yoh, still staring at the spot where Horo had just stood.

"Miho?" Yoh waved a hand in front of my face.

And just then, reality hit me like a ton of bricks. My body went numb as I jumped to my feet, racing over to the exit only to find the snow shaman out of sight. I wanted to chase after him, but something told me my efforts would only go to waste. I bit my lip, taking a glimpse back at Yoh. "Any chance of you telling me what happened in the end of that tape?"

He grinned and shook his head. "Sorry Miho."

"Damnit."

I never did find out what was on the rest of that tape. But looking back into the past, I don't think I needed to. In the end, what matters most aren't the pieces of evidence you dig to find… but rather, the small things that make you realize what goes beyond words or actions. Seeing or hearing things for yourself isn't required to believe… awakening to the truth and letting your heart discover what's real is what makes the journey all worth it.

That, or I'm just being a hopeless romantic.

Rikku: Yeah, I just added that sentimental stuff in the end because I figured it'd make for a sweeter ending of this chapter. xD

This chapter took a while, and I'm sorry!

Well, hope you enjoyed it! Please review!

-
Nishikido-Rikku
Formerly, x-Rikku-x

xxxxx

A friendly reminder to READ ALL RE-WRITES!