Sorry for the long wait! Here I am again, with the 4rth chappie of "The Real Itachi"! Enjoy!
At a huge, empy area with tainted glass-tiled floors
"You two are always up to no good!" said Sasori, scolding Deidara and Kisame. "You wouln't like it if Itachi hunted you down everyday!"
"B-but, Sasori-KUN!" said chibified Deidara, at his cutest. "We were just taking the necessary precautions!"
"Deidara's right, Sasori-san! We're doing this for Itachi-san!" said Kisame, defending Deidara and himself
"Well, I guess it can't be helped.." said Sasori, shaking his head slightly. "You two will just have to try something else, …shall I suggest flower arranging?"
"…….." no reply came out from Deidara and Kisame - -
At Itachi's room
"CURSE DEIDARA AND KISAME! LOOK WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO MY PRECIOUS..AND ONCE-WHITE UNDERARMS!" shouted Itachi, frantically attempting to remove the black ink from his underarms. "One of these days….POW! Right to the moon!" - -
At Kisame's room
"Ne ne, Kisame-san! What's in our to-do list for PLAN B?" asked chibified Deidara, jumping up and down in front of Kisame
"…I don't know. And I'm not in the mood to make a PLAN B right now.." said Kisame, giving a huge SIGH.
"Don't lie to me! You just said that because PLAN A was a failure, ne?" said Deidara, teasing Kisame
"Oh boy…I'VE TOLD YOU ALREADY, THAT I'M NOT IN THE MOOD! DO YOU WANT ME TO SHAVE YOU TO DEATH!" shouted Kisame. "Well…to make exceptions, we'll see what Itachi's up to, first!"
"ALRIGHT!" shouted Deidara, doing a high jump. "Oooh, this is going to be so much fun! I'll order my clay critters to spy on Itachi!"
"Please, Deidara." Said Kisame. "NOT NOW." - -
Deidara and Kisame suddenly hears voice talking outside of the room
:I think it's Itachi and Sasori having a conversation…well, read to find out! XD: - -
"…Sasori." Said Itachi. "I'm going out for a while, maybe take a stroll around the outskirts of Konoha village"
"What? But the leader might call for you any time now!" said Sasori, starting to look worried. "And…AREN'T YOU BRINGING KISAME ALONG?"
Itachi grumbles
"NO WAY AM I BRINGING THAT SADISTIC TROUBLEMAKER." Said Itachi, eyes starting to flame up. "He's too much trouble, compared to that Deidara subordinate of his."
GASP! WHEN DID DEIDARA BECOME KISAME'S SUBORDINATE! Thought Sasori, starting to get all suspicious
"Ahem, I see…" said Sasori. "Well, I'll just tell the leader that you're out on a bunny hunt."
"Okay, I'm off" said Itachi, starting to head for the main door. "And please, BABYSIT DEIDARA AND KISAME..MAKE SURE THEY BEHAVE!"
At Kisame's room
"D-did you hear what Itachi-san just said!" said Kisame, looking worried. "He's going to make Sasori-san BABYSIT US!"
"Keh. I don't give, Kisame-kun! We're still going to spy on Itachi, NO MATTER WHAT!" said Deidara, chibifying himself
"Oh yeah! We musn't let at anyone find out that he's GAY!" said Kisame. "To the D and K mobile!"
At the front lawn of the Akatsuki Headquarters
"DEIDARA!" shouted Kisame. "WHAT KIND OF D AND K MOBILE IS THIS!"
Kisame points frantically at some worn out wagon
"Well sorry, KISAME! This is the best I could do!" said Deidara. "At least THIS is better than having nothing to ride on!"
"Damn…CURSE THE AUTHOR!" shouted Kisame, raising a tightly clenched fist. - -
Deidara and Kisame carefully gets on the wagon
"Geez, I feel like a beggar riding on one of these!" said Kisame, feeling very uncomfortable
"Aww, stop complaining!" said Deidara, shouting in front of Kisame's face. "We can spy on Itachi with this!"
"And how are you sure!" said Kisame, folding his arms and looking away from Deidara. "If Itachi finds out we're here...He'll be the one to shave us with my Samehada!"
"Now YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S BECOMING A 'FRAIDY CAT!" said Deidara, turning into an angry chibi figure. "Don't worry! He'll be too busy trying to take off the black stuff on his underarms!"
"Right…whatever." Said Kisame, sulking. "Move this dang wagon then!"
Deidara manages to move to wagon with his chakra…but he accidentally put too much so…the wagon went speeing towards Konoha village like a space rocket - -
"AAAAACK, DEIDARA!" shouted Kisame, his skin almost falling out of place. "LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DOOOOONE!" - -
The wagon manages to reach Konoha, but unfortunately, it slams into a giant tree
Both Deidara and Kisame were sent flying into an abandoned shack - -
"Deidara…NEXT TIME, REMIND ME NEVER TO TAG ALONG WITH YOU!" said Kisame, spitting bits of wood from his mouth
"Hehe, sorry Kisame-san!" said chibi Deidara, looking innocent. "Now let's see….i'm guessing that Itachi's making out with a man! Shall I say…his brother?"
"HELL NO! THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT!" shouted Kisame. "Let's go find him then!" - -
At a local cosmetic shop in Konoha
"What lovely cometics." Said Itachi, carefully looking at all the lipsticks, make ups, eyeliners, etc. "I wonder which one will look good on me? Heehee. BUT, mor importantly…I have to find a solution that will erase the annoying black stuff on my underarms!"
A sales lady approaches Itachi
"Hello, sir! Welcome to Konoha Cosmetics! Is there something I can do for you?" smiled the sales lady. OMG, is this man GAY! She suddenly thought
"Err, yes. I'm looking for something…like a solution that can remove the blackness in one's underarms." Said Itachi without hesitation.
"Ahhh, I see. Well why don't you try this BLACK-AWAY WHITENING LOTION for your underarms?" suggested the sales lady, handing Itachi a big, silver bottle.
"..I guess this will do." Said Itachi, examining the bottle. "How much for it?"
"70 yen" replied the sales lady. - -
Itachi hands the lady 70 yen - -
At Deidara and Kisame's location
"You know, if Itachi's still trying to remove the black ink…it's a dead give away that he'll be at the cosmetics store" said Kisame, looking around the village shops
"Yeah, you've got a point there!" said Deidara with a huge smile on his face - -
Itachi suddenly exists from a building just across from where Deidara and Kisame are
"D-d-deidara…don't tell me who just came out..!" said Kisame, starting to shiver with fear
"I know, I know!" said Deidara, shaking frantically - -
Itachi suddenly looks at Deidara and Kisame with deadly eyes
"What are you two doing here?" said Itachi, looking slightly shocked
"N-nothing, Itachi-CHAN!" said Deidara, sweatdropping. "Err, we were just taking a stroll around Konoha!"
"Shouldn't you two be in the HQ? And…more importantly, HAVE YOU DIVULGED THE YOU-KNOW-WHAT, YET!" said Itachi, the PRICELESS face almost taking form on him
"No, no. NEVER, Itachi-san!" said Kisame. "We wouldn't do anything to hurt your precious feelings
"GOOD. Now I've got to run along and do something IMPORTANT." Said Itachi
And with that, Itachi runs back to the HQ in a flash - -
"What was THAT for!" said Deidara. "It seems like he knows our intentions! And if ya ask me, I don't care whether the WHOLE WORLD knows that he's GAY!"
"Well, I CARE!" said Kisame. "He'd be in a LOT OF TROUBLE if everyone knew about it! I mean, what would his hoard of fangirls think! What would Sasuke think! And more importantly, he'll be haunting us for the rest of our lives!"
"…You've got a point there! But oh well..it's not like he'll be remembering that forever now..wouldn't it?" said Deidara, slightly agreeing. "I suggest we go back to base and continue our spying!"
At Itachi's room
"This stuff HAS to work on me." Said Itachi, opening the cap and streaking the tip over his underarms - -
Itachi felt something REALLY, REALLY uncomfortable
"AAAAH! CURSE THIS WORLD!" shouted Itachi, now looking at his black and HAIRY underarms. "Now…my underarms are BLACK…and it's completely covered with THICK HAIR. MY KAMI, WHAT DID I EVER DO TO DESERVE THIS!"
Itachi looks at his hideous underarms in a mirror - -
"If this has something to do with my horoscope for this month, then I'd better start commiting suicide tomorrow! It's either I die, or admit to the WHOLE WORLD that I'M GAY!" shouted Itachi.
Wow, I wonder what will happen to poor Itachi? XD Opinions, suggestions, comments, constructive critisicms, please! Oh and..READ AND REVIEW!