Okay, here I am again with the 5th chappie of "The Real Itachi"! And to those who reviewed, thanks so much! I greatly appreciate it! Now…ON WITH THE STORY! YAY! XD


In Itachi's room

OH GREAT…I know this is JUST A DREAM so…Itachi, please calm down! Thought Itachi, panting heavily

"These monster underarms has got to disappear!" said Itachi, looking around his room trying to find something that could solve his huge dilemma. "AHA! I'VE GOT IT!" - -

At Kisame's room

"I STILL don't get it, Kisame-san!" said Deidara, pacing back and forth. "Maybe Itachi-CHAN's a PSYCHIC or something!"

"DON'T jump to conclusions! Maybe he's an escapee from a mental institute!" said Kisame, trying hard not to laugh - -

Somebody starts banging wildy on the door

"Aw c'mon now, who could that be?" said Deidara, watching Kisame open the door- -

:Who would suspect? IT'S ITACHI:

Itachi crashes inside Kisame's room and falls on the floor - -

"ACK! ITACHI-SAN!" gasped Kisame, looking at Itachi who was all sprawled on the floor - -

Itachi quickly gets on his feet, not bothering what just happened to him

"KISAME! I know I shouldn't be telling you this but…YOU'VE GOT TO HELP ME!" shouted Itachi, grabbing hold on the collar of Kisame's robe and shaking it frantically

"Wh-wh-WHAT! Maybe you should consult Sasori-san instead!" said Kisame, almost falling apart

"Kisame-san…I think you should do as Itachi-CHAN says." Said Deidara, sitting on Kisame's bed and looking out the window. "You wouldn't want him to kill you on the spot now, would you?"

"Oh……FINE THEN!" said Kisame. "Err, Itachi-san…could you please calm down and let go of me?" - -

Itachi throws Kisame on the floor

"Now listen here! I DON'T KNOW WHY ON EARTH ARE THESE MISFORTUNATE AND TROUBLESOME PROBLEMS ARE ATTACKING ME…but I think you can help me solve ONE PROBLEM!" said Itachi, eyes widened to a pulp

"Wh-what it is, Itachi-san?" asked Kisame, starting to sweat. CRAP! HE'LL MURDER ME HERE! IN THIS VERY ROOM! GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!

"I WANT YOU TO SHAVE THESE HIDEOUS HAIRS ON MY UNDERARMS WITH YOUR SAMEHADA!" shouted Itachi, begging Kisame on bended knees.

"WHAT!" gasped both Deidara and Kisame

THIS IS IT! THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF THE 1ST STAGE OF MY SLOW, AND PAINFUL DEATH! Though Kisame, sweat all over his face

"W-ell…I'll see what I can do, Itachi-san! I'm sure removing the hairs won't be a problem!" said Kisame, looking all pressured and freaked out

"Good! Now hop to it! Ordered Itachi, taking off his robe, revealing the hairy eclipse of his underarms

Ewww, NASTY! Itachi-CHAN's armpits are all…DARK and FURRY! Gasped Deidara, looking away and trying hard not to laugh his body parts off

"I want to supervise! I want to supervise!" said Deidara, jumping up and down like a little kid :AWWW: - -

Kisame removes the Samehad out of it's sheath

"Okay…HERE WE GO!" said Kisame, proceding to slice off the hairs on Itachi's underarms with his Samehada - -

Kisame made a powerful slash over Itachi's armpits - -

The tip of the Samehada suddenly produced a huge and visible crack

Itachi, Kisame and Deidara all gasped in horror - -

"WHAT! I DON'T BELIEVE THIS!" shouted Kisame, eyes almost popping out of their sockets. "My Samehada should shave almost EVERYTHING!"

"GASP! The hairs on Itachi-CHAN's armpits look like they've been blessed by Tsunade! It's STRONG!" said Deidara, the look on his face started to look priceless - -

"AAAAH! THE HAIRS WON'T FALL OFF!" shouted Itachi, starting to pull the hairs himself - -

Soon, Itachi felt a huge throb of pain shoot down the palm of his hand - -

"OUCH, DANG IT!" shouted Itachi, quickly withdrawing his hand, only to reveal the redness on his palm

"Quick, get Sasori-KUN!" said Deidara, ordering Kisame

"Roger that!" said Kisame, returning the Samehada to it's sheath

Kisame leaves the room

"Okay…if Sasori STILL DOESN'T manage to get the hairs off…I'm really going to commit suicide!" said Itachi, almost out his sanity

"Don't, Itachi-CHAN! You'll only waste the value of your precious life!" said Deidara, trying to stop Itachi from doing anymore crazy acts

"I HAVE TO! I can't admit to the whole world that I'm GAY! If they DID find out, I'm still going to be dead meat!" said Itachi, starting to calm down - -

Kisame and Sasori suddenly enters the room

"OMG, Itachi!" shouted Sasori, running over to Itachi. "Your underarms…have become a DISASTER!"

"You're our only hope now, Sasori-san! You've got to use the power of your puppets to the fullest!" said Kisame

"If that's what you're going to do, then DO IT!" said Itachi, raising his underarms for Sasori to see

"Okay, this won't take long!" said Sasori, transferring chakra to the strings of his puppet - -

The puppet starts to attack the hairs on Itachi's underarms - -

As soon as the puppet goes near Itachi's underarms, it started to explode - -

"GACK! MY PUPPET!" shouted Sasori, already on the verge of tears as he watched his precious puppet explode in different parts of the room

"Ack, my room!" shouted Kisame, looking at the huge holes on the wall made by Sasori's puppet - -

"It's no use!" shouted Itachi, looking hoplessly at his underarms. "I-if I continue to keep the secret, all these troublesome things start to appear on me!"

"What…secret?" asked Sasori, starting to get all suspicious

"Err, IT'S NOTHING, Sasori-KUN!" said Deidara, sweatdropping

"Well, it's no use if you people don't want to tell me." Said Sasori. "I guess I'll be off now..and repair my broken puppet"

With that, Sasori leaves the room

"Grrr, I AM STARTING TO GET ANNOYED!" shouted Itachi. "If this persists, i'll be forced to do something nasty." - -

Itachi leaves the room

"Argh, MY ROOM!" cried Kisame, looking at the giant hole on the wall that was also made by Sasori's puppet

"Awww, that's ok, Kisame-san! You can always SLEEP WITH ZETSU-SAMA!" said chibified Deidara.

"WHAT!" shouted Kisame. "I'd rather sleep outside than with Zetsu!"

"I'm just joking, Kisame-san! Of course you can sleep in my room tonight!" said Deidara

"Phew…really?"

"Yes, REALLY. But don't get too gay like Ita-CHAN! I'll have some clay critters repair your room! So don't worry too much!"

"Phew….Thanks a lot, Deidara! You don't know how much this means to me!"


Aww, end of chapter! Now..i wonder what Itachi will do if those troublesome stuff start to make another attack on him? Read the next chappie to find out! Read and review, please! THANKS MUCH!