Chapter 20
Another Two Bite the Dust
Monday, September 2, 7:50 p.m.
The Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom
In the instant after relaxed John and relaxed Quirrell grasped hands in a friendly handshake, Paulina yanked her wand free of her wand holster.
The first thing she did was to cast a wordless Silencio spell, so that nobody outside the classroom could hear Quirrell's screaming.
By now, Quirrell was indeed screaming, loudly, because his shaking-hand had been captured between both of John's hands. Paulina could hear the sizzle, of Quirrell's hand burning, from across the room.
A high-pitched voice from underneath Quirrell's turban demanded, "QUIRRELL, WHAT IS GOING ON? WHY ARE WE IN PAIN? I HEARD NO SPELL CAST."
Paulina, having silenced the room to outsiders, now ran over and—by hand, not by magic—grabbed Quirrell's turban and flung it away from her. Then Paulina, instead of using Expelliarmus to bring Quirrell's wand forcibly to her (which would push Quirrell away from John in the process), Accioed Quirrell's wand.
Paulina tossed Quirrell's wand into a corner of the room.
John still had a death grip (so to speak) on Quirrell's right hand. Quirrell, in trying to break this grip, managed only to start the burning-process on his left hand.
Now John did a leg sweep, using his left leg to pull Quirrell's lower legs towards him. John let go of Quirrell's right hand, but only so Quirrell's butt, back, shoulders, and back of head would hit the floor.
"OW!" yelled the high-pitched voice. "I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING!"
John dropped down to the floor, grabbed Quirrell by a shoulder—which made Quirrell scream, and which started the burning-process on Quirrell's shoulder. Then John forcibly turned Quirrell over, so that the face on the back of the professor's head was looking up at John.
"Who are you?" John asked. Though of course he knew whose face he was seeing.
"I AM LORD VOLDEMORT! I AM IMMORTAL! I WILL DESTROY YOU! FEAR ME!" Voldemort-Face declared.
Paulina shrieked in pretended shock, "Voldemort is teaching Harry and Hermione?"
John said to Voldemort-Face, "Oh really, you'll destroy me? Right now, it looks like I'm destroying you. You're burning up, in case you haven't noticed."
Before Voldemort-Face spoke another word, John covered almost all of Voldemort-Face with both of John's hands.
Voldemort-Face screamed.
About fifteen seconds later, the screaming stopped. About thirty seconds after this, all of Quirrellmort was a human-shaped pile of ash on the floor.
This time, John saw no wraith with Voldemort's face, and there was no magical spectacle—killing Voldy was anticlimactic, to be honest.
Paulina cancelled her Silencio spell. Then she hugged John, and kissed him sexily enough to make John's blood boil—
—then Paulina stepped back and said, "I have an idea, honey: Let's send Amelia Bones a message-Patronus, and tell her what just happened."
The message-Patronus that John sent to the Minister for Magic said, "This is John Potter. I'm in the DADA classroom at Hogwarts. Professor Quirrell was possessed by the spirit of Voldemort, and it seems I've accidentally killed both of them. I need Aurors here. One thing to add: I don't trust Dumbledore."
Right after John sent the message-Patronus, the Spirit of Hogwarts appeared in the DADA classroom. Paulina blurted, "I recognize you! I've read about you."
(To which John replied, "Really? In what book?" Paulina promptly smacked John's arm.)
The Spirit of Hogwarts informed the Potters, "I am required to inform the headmaster of a death in the castle, but in this case, I will not do so till the Aurors have entered the castle. I also will inform the Aurors that, just as you shall claim, the spirit that possessed Professor Quirrell was the Dark Lord Tom Riddle."
John said, "I hope you know that Dumbledore will try to cover everything up. Imperiuses are illegal, but Confunduses and Obliviates are not."
The Spirit of Hogwarts replied, "All spells cast inside the castle are under my control. Tonight the headmaster will discover what my being the Founders' representative truly means, and whom I truly obey."
Ten minutes later, in the headmaster's office
Albus Dumbledore was questioning a house-elf. This house-elf had been listening, invisibly, in the Slytherin common room as several fifth-year Slytherins had pumped Gemma Farley for juicy gossip about her dinner with the Potters (and with the Muggle-born, Granger).
Albus already knew from other sources that Ron Weasley had been mentioned at the "Birthday Club" dinner, and that Harry Potter had expressed a scathing opinion of the redhead; now Albus wanted to know what Farley's own opinion of the youngest Weasley boy was.
After all, Farley, as a Slytherin prefect, could greatly help or could greatly hurt Albus's schemes for a friendship between Gryffindor Harry Potter and Slytherin Ron Weasley—
—unless Albus took the direct approach of potioning both Harry and Mr Weasley; but Albus had sworn on his magic not to be caught doing this.
*Flash* The Spirit of Hogwarts appeared in the headmaster's office. She said calmly, "Minister for Magic Amelia Bones, Department of Magical Law Enforcement Director Rufus Scrimgeour and five Aurors just have entered the castle. Professor Minerva McGonagall has received them and is leading them to the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom."
"WHAT?" Albus yelled. "Why is the Minister in the castle? Why are there Aurors in the castle? What happened in the DADA classroom? Why was I not informed?"
Bloody hell, Albus thought. Tom probably lost his temper and killed a student, and with Amelia here, it will be almost impossible to cover this up. Albus's usual technique to cover up embarrassing activities, Obliviates and Confunduses, would be unwise if Aurors were on site.
The Spirit of Hogwarts would not answer Albus's questions, beyond stating, "I am following the Founders' orders in this matter."
Albus apparated to inside the DADA classroom—or rather, he tried to apparate there. He found himself outside the open door of the DADA classroom.
Silently the Spirit of Hogwarts appeared beside Albus, in the corridor outside the DADA classroom.
Also outside the DADA classroom were five Aurors, Minerva, and two suits of armour that were mostly blocking the doorway. Albus could look into the classroom because the door was open, but no human bigger than a toddler could slip between the suits of armour unless the magical suits of armour allowed it.
Albus saw that inside the DADA classroom were John Potter and Mrs Potter, Amelia, Rufus, a long purple cloth on the floor, a wooden wand that lay in a corner on the floor—and a strange, oblong pile of ash.
"What happened?" Albus asked.
One of the younger Aurors replied, "That's what the Boss Lady is trying to figure out. Looks like your DADA professor burnt to ash, and your student accidentally killed him by touching him."
Albus thought, This can't be right. Only Harry Potter can kill Tom!
Aloud, Albus said, "It's quite kind of John Potter to take the blame for something that Harry did."
The Spirit of Hogwarts replied, "Harry Potter has not been in this classroom today or yesterday. It was John Potter who accidentally killed Quirinus Quirrell, who had been possessed by Tom Riddle."
"Possessed?" Minerva repeated.
"John Potter killed Quirinus?" Albus blurted. "How? John Potter's birthday is 1st July!"
Needless to say, everyone stopped to give Albus looks that said The old man has gone round the twist—except for John Potter. He smirked, then went back to talking to Amelia and Rufus.
Albus looked at the Aurors who were outside the classroom. "Since what happened here tonight is an accident, not murder, you in the DMLE are not needed. I will handle it from here; leave now."
"Albus!" Minerva said, looking scandalised.
The Senior Auror said, "The Boss Lady—Minister Bones—is questioning an admitted killer. We leave only when the Boss Lady says we leave."
"I need to get in there," Albus said pompously. "Move aside," he ordered the suits of armour.
The same Senior Auror said, "This is now a crime scene, sir. Nobody goes in there till the Boss Lady or the Director says it's okay."
Foop. Albus tried to apparate into the DADA classroom. Instead, he apparated to a spot in the corridor that was a foot away from where he had stood one second earlier.
Foop. Albus successfully apparated into the empty classroom that was next to the DADA classroom. From there, Albus tried to apparate into the DADA classroom from this new direction—
Foop. Albus wound up back amongst the crowd of onlookers again, in the corridor outside the DADA classroom.
The Spirit of Hogwarts said to him, "You are blocked from the classroom until and unless Minister Bones or Director Scrimgeour requests for you to come inside the classroom."
"Now see here! I am the headmaster of this school! You will do as I say."
"Not always true," the Spirit of Hogwarts replied. "I follow the Founders' orders when your orders conflict with theirs."
"This is my school, I am the headmaster, and one of my professors lies dead on the floor."
"This same professor was possessed by the Dark Lord Tom Riddle since early July of this year, if not sooner."
"Ssh!" said Albus. "Do not say things like that! It would frighten the students if you said such things where others could hear."
"Albus?" said Minerva, "Quirinus was possessed by an evil spirit, and you let him teach here?"
Albus said, "I do not remember the Spirit of Hogwarts ever telling me this—"
The statue-woman in the four-colour robes replied, "Five times, headmaster, I have told you about Professor Quirrell being possessed. The first time was 3rd July; the fifth time was yesterday, three hours before the children arrived."
"Well, maybe my mind was on other things during those five times."
The Senior Auror walked up between the suits of armour. "Minister Bones, Director Scrimgeour," he called out to the two dignitaries in the classroom, "the Spirit of Hogwarts confirms that the DADA professor was possessed by someone named Tom Riddle."
"Who named himself Voldemort," the Spirit of Hogwarts said.
Everyone outside the classroom, except for Albus and the Spirit of Hogwarts, gasped, hearing that name. Inside the classroom, Rufus looked startled.
Albus, who was forced to remain outside the DADA classroom, watched helplessly as Amelia took a memory from Mrs Potter, then a memory from John Potter. Amelia then handed the two memory-vials to Rufus, who put the two memory-vials into a navy-blue pocket of his red robes.
Albus sighed. Obliviating John Potter and his blond wife now would be worse than useless.
Albus thought, Can this day get any worse?
(Albus forgot that the Three Fates cackle when they hear a mortal ask this question.)
Inside the classroom, Mrs Potter said to Amelia, "By the way, ma'am, I see you have Aurors here whom you're not using. Yesterday at the Welcoming Feast, Headmaster Dumbledore warned all the students away from the third-floor hallway on the right-hand side, unless they 'wish to die a very painful death.' May I suggest, ma'am, you send your Aurors up there to check the place out?"
Albus felt cold fear, because the young blond woman's face, as she had spoken, looked helpful and guileless. Alas, Amelia never would suspect that John Potter's wife had a hidden plan to destroy Albus's reputation in order to protect her husband.
Amelia facepalmed, then asked, "Did Dumbledore really say such a thing last night? 'Die a very painful death,' truly?"
John replied solemnly, "He did. Susan said at dinner tonight that inside the Hufflepuff common room last night, and at breakfast and lunch today, the older years were debating whether to explore the place or not. Fred and George Weasley reported at dinner tonight that behind a locked door was a room with a giant three-headed dog."
Amelia facepalmed again. Then she looked meaningfully at Rufus. Rufus called for the Senior Auror, whose name was Grenwick—then the two suits of armour let Grenwick pass into the DADA classroom with no bother. Albus felt a moment's envy.
For some reason, the Senior Auror took only three of the other four Aurors with him when he left the DADA classroom; one Auror remained behind. Albus could not guess why this one Auror stayed—maybe to act as a bodyguard to Amelia?
Not five seconds later, the two suits of armour moved apart; and Amelia, Rufus, John Potter and his wife stepped out of the DADA classroom. Amelia immediately asked Minerva, "How many students in this school are under seventeen today?"
Albus could not guess why Amelia was asking this question, but Albus suspected he would not like the "because."
Meanwhile, Minerva was answering the question: "Two hundred fifty-six students, minus however-many sixth-years who've celebrated their birthday yesterday or today. I suspect this second number is zero."
Amelia looked at the one Auror remaining in the corridor. "Bennett, to us."
Then Amelia looked at Rufus. "Child Endangerment, I'm thinking. Do you concur?"
Rufus nodded, then turned to face Albus. "You moron, you hired the Dark Lord Voldemort to teach Hogwarts students. Albus Dumbledore, you are under arrest for 256 counts of Child Endangerment.
"You do not have to say anything. But, it may harm your defence if you do not mention, when questioned, something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence. Do you understand what I have just said?"
John was tempted, oh so tempted, to speak a cryptic reference to the Prophecy that only Dumbledore would understand, or to make a reference to "soul containers." John wanted to let Dumbledore know that the old man had been outsmarted.
But in the end, John said nothing at all.
John and Paulina watched in silence as magic-suppression handcuffs were slapped on Dumbledore's wrists, and the bearded manipulator was frog-marched from the hallway outside the DADA classroom, to outside the Hogwarts wards.
Besides, John thought, how many times did Dumbledore withhold information from me, even when I desperately needed the information and I deserved to know? You get what you give, Dumbledore.
John's happy mood got even happier when Paulina leaned over and quietly purred in his ear, "You're going to get win-the-lottery lucky tonight, my husband. Expect your nerve endings to feel indescribable delights, honey."
John much wanted to head straight back to Gryffindor Married Suite 1 and to immediately celebrate "We did it!" with his wife.
But first, John wrote a note, and elf-mailed the note to Ragnok. Ragnok deserved to hear the note's good news before anyone else did—
.
It was Quirrellmort who killed the six goblin guards. Both Quirinus Quirrell and Voldemort now are dead. I killed them tonight.